Pussy episode with comedians and callers

all right guys yes it is the pussy episode of oral stimulation i am melissa i am joined by my amazing co-host alex good evening melissa how you doing tonight i'm doing great i am super excited about tonight i am too you know why why because we get to put pussy on a pedestal i'm all about that i'm all about that but you know what before we get to that i have a little issue to take up yeah now we have email right we have oral stim at gmail.com that is our email we've got twitter what's our twitter account at oral stim we've got a facebook page we've got personal pages we have cell phones we have the studio number 800-893-9562 there's all these ways to reach us but i've been talking about a skittles blowjob for a long time and everyone just goes along with it no one says no to it and i'm like okay i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do it there's a word i came across a little issue what's the issue what if the guy is so big if you put a skittle in your mouth you're gonna choke on it this is a legitimate concern i ran into this issue recently i came across this guy's cock well the whole guy but specifically that area and i'm thinking oh i'm gonna show this guy everything i'm at a total loss i'm gonna have to start over my theories are out the window what am i supposed to do i would get a fruit roll up and wrap it around that's brilliant would that work or you know those stuff fruit the footlong fruit things yes i would do that wrap it around it and add a twist to it why didn't i ask you first well how'd it go was it did you uh end up eating the skittles by yourself luckily there were no skittles no skittles well yeah you can't just bust out a bag of skittles be like hey new guy well why not because that's weird give him something to remember yeah but what if it goes somewhere with this guy then you can't you can't start up like my last relationship it started off with like you know some illicit activity in a place where there shouldn't have been and i never lived it down so i'm gonna start things off normally by looking at his cock size and thinking about how you're gonna get skittles on it that's normal that's normal for in here i think it's normal everywhere people actually a lot of my friends they discuss like the whole altoids thing and they talk about the um skittles doesn't that seem painful which one altoids i think it's like a fresh it freshens it it's like a refresher they have jelly minty's down you can make it tingle yes listen i'm gonna i'm gonna give you guys a little confession out there okay sometimes when i'm talking to my girlfriends and i'm describing a guy's junk as i often do i use comparisons of candy bars okay i want to hear about this i always like to hear about females and what they think about guys junk so like um one of the previous guys i was with you could compare maybe to like seven rolos or like three quarters of one of those um reese's candy bars what's it called the fast break yeah yeah like three quarters of that not the king size one the regular one you're talking like 100 grand are we talking kit kats no kit kats baby ruth yeah maybe yeah because those those have gotten small over the past couple years huh sorry you more of like a butterfinger are you more of like a snickers girl well it's hard to say i mean because this guy that i'm talking about there's no candy bar for that we're talking like loaves of bread now we're into baguettes and croissants so how does that work out so you usually your comparison is are usually candy bars yeah so how do you like when you talk to your girlfriends how do you compare them to your girlfriends they go like there's not a candy bar for this guy yeah i mean usually it's like haha Holy shit. There's not a candy bar for this guy. Yeah. I mean, usually it's like, ha, ha, ha. It was like this. And what'd they say? Mindy gets it. Mindy understands. I used to draw little cartoon characters. Oh, perfect. Characters of penises? Yeah, and then I'd give them voices. Like there was Long Duck Dong, which was, you know, this really big one. And then the little chubby guy that always wanted to go to the left, you know. I don't remember his name. This was middle school. This was all imagination. Uh-huh. That's awesome. No, it's not. Would you make him like really veiny? Like put hair on him and stuff? No, no. When you're in middle school, you don't know about veins. I didn't find out about veins until like high school. Yeah, I don't think I knew about veins at this time. They were more like anime eyes in like the shape of a penis, which is like a little thing. Yeah. With some like ball feet or something. Gotcha. How about you, Melissa? You know what? Actually, one time there was this guy that I had a huge crush on and he sent me a picture of his junk and it had a bunch of veins. And so my friend nicknamed him, You're So Vein. Would you guys hum it to each other when he came around secretly? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. But what about you, Alex? I mean, what do you guys do comparison-wise? As far as penises or vaginas? No, like pussies, girls' titties, whatever. You know what? That's funny because I think on our end, we come up with different names for them. As far as like, you know, there's pussy, twat, snatch. I don't know. It's weird because I think some of... I've had friends that actually name their girlfriends' pussies. Something other than their girlfriend's name? Is it their ex-girlfriend's name? Well, some of them. Some of them are still together. Some aren't. I don't want to disclose. I'm only listening. That's so gross. There's so many. But do girls actually do that? I mean, do you have a name for yours? No. No, not at all? I don't name my vibrators. I don't name my man's junk. I don't even name my car, okay? But did any of your boyfriends or exes, have they ever named your pussy? Besides like theirs or mine? My iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç iç One of my previous relationships did name his junk for like a minute. I think he named it Henry or something. I don't know. But there's a lot of pussy names that are set to turn off. If a guy was like, hey, bring your snatch over here, I would take my snatch the other direction. Are you serious? Oh, that's so gross. I got called Poonani all through high school, okay? Nay Nay, Poonani. There's so many. They're so gross. I just stick with pussy or roast beef pussy. How about, you ever seen like Vijay J? I used to. Used to, no? Not anymore. No. Oh, you know what? When I was in college, a girlfriend of mine and I, we used to call it a cooter. A cooter? Yeah. We would, when we were being squirrely, we would go three, two, one, cooter contact. Are you serious? Yeah. Yeah. What about like Pink Taco? Oh. That doesn't work. If you guys can hear that, we're really sorry. I'm scared over here. I feel like there's a ghost trying to break in on me. I know. They're going to pound through the wall. I feel like we need to wear a hard hat. I didn't even bring mine. All right. You know, since we're talking about pussy, all the construction workers wanted to stop by and, you know, bring the man point of view. They were hoping for a glimpse. Yeah. Well, maybe. I mean, we do have the video. If anybody wants to check that out. Mindy's saying hello. Later in the show, we're going to be joined by some very funny East Coast comedians, Keith Furstenberg and Henry Cruz. Cool. So we're going to have to get their take on all this because maybe East Coasters have different names for pussies. Yeah. I can't wait. I'm going to ask. I have a couple of questions to ask them. Is pussy an okay name? You guys, is that cool for guys? Yeah, straight up. Can we all agree on that? I think we, I use that a lot. Like I want to tear up that pussy. Tear that pussy up. I think that's common. I think that's something that's used a lot. I don't know. For anybody that's listening out there, do you have names or what do you guys call pussy? Please call in at 1-800-893-9562. Yeah. Tell us all those dirty names or send it to us on Twitter. We have our guy remotely Twittering, so we won't actually see it, but we'll catch up with it next week. We'll get everyone back in the room. Thank you, Austin. We know you're out there. We appreciate you. Shout out to Austin. Yeah. Um, so other than names, like a Christmas tree, some people like to decorate their pussy. Really? Yes. And how and what? Okay, well, first of all, you strip it down of all the natural decor and then they start piling junk on like crystals, fur, and feathers. How would they get that to stick? How does it stand? I don't know. They have glue, I guess. I mean, there's spas that do this, but it's so nasty because after you get waxed, it's all like, you don't want anyone to look down there, especially not at your new jewelry. Wait, what do they call it? What's the term for that? Merkins. Merkins? That's the feathery ones, but like the crystals called like vajazzling. Vajazzling, a form of, a stem off of bedazzling, right? Yeah. Okay. That makes sense. Maybe you'd rather get bedazzled. What do you tell your girls? Hey, I'm going to go. I'm going to go and vajazzle my vajayjay later. Let's all go together. I could see a bunch of girls laying on like a bed or one of those, those like massage probably tables or those tables all talking about, oh, I'm going to get like a heart on mine. What are you getting on yours? Have you ever gotten anything waxed? Have I? Yeah. My eyebrows. I've got my eyebrows waxed. Dude, fuck that. It hurts? It hurts so bad. I don't think it's that bad. Well, maybe in certain spots. Well, get your junk done. I probably wouldn't. I did it for a long time and it was like, I can't even, I don't even know the benefits of it. Wait, so you've gotten like your vagina area done? Yes. How about like towards your asshole? Yeah, the whole thing. The whole thing? The whole thing. It's clean? Yeah. How long does that usually last before it goes back? A couple of weeks. That's pretty high maintenance then. Every couple of weeks you got to get that cleaned up? Yeah. Yeah. Every. Well, you have to let it grow out. You have to let it grow out. You have to let it grow out enough for the wax to get it all and then rip it out violently. Really? Yeah. But actually like a lot of girls nowadays, I think they would maybe probably get them lasered, right? You can get a laser, but that hurts just as bad. That feels like a snapping rubber band. That's what it feels like. Yes. But I think at that point, I think at least you won't have to worry about it. Like, right. It's continuous. I mean, at that point. Right. But here's the thing. Changing trends. Mm-hmm. Right. A couple of years ago, everybody wanted everything shaved off. And then it kind of goes back and forth. You don't know if you want a lot or you want a little. Yeah. Like a little surprise when you're with someone new. To find out or not if they're shaved? Yeah. What do you prefer? I prefer a little hair. I like a trim. What do you got, Mindy? Well, for the ladies, I think there should be a little bit of hair. I like carpets. Yeah. I agree. I agree. I agree. I think if they're completely shaved. I don't care that. It throws me off like a... Mets is my... Me, Mets. I wouldn't mind it. I'm not going to lie to you. I mean, I don't mind if it's completely shaved. I always think it's kind of weird if you just kind of come across a guy that's completely shaved. Like, whoa, what are you doing? That would... Yeah. I mean, it's nice. It's nice. Don't get me wrong. It's really good to go down on. But it's kind of like, what exactly were you thinking when you were doing this? Maybe they missed a spot. So it was awkward. And I just had to clean it all up. So it grew back evenly. That happens. Maybe they wanted to take a picture of it. They were getting it ready for some photo shoots. Oh, they wanted it to look bigger. Does that work? Maybe. Maybe they're doing a little porn. Porn stars do it all the time. Oh, well, both of them shave, the men and women. Maybe they're trying to please a lady. Like they were worried that their hair smelled bad. Ugh. Or, yeah. You know what kind of throws me off is the guy who does it right before you go down on him. And then you're choking and gagging. On the leftovers. Or the stubble. It's nasty. It's like you missed a spot. Yeah, but now. So I actually have a question. It just popped up in my head randomly. So say if a guy, you like say you missed a spot. I mean, if he had like a couple, like the sides, like he had sideburns on his penis, does that totally throw you off? Sideburns? Yeah. Like he just got the middle? Yeah. Like he maybe like around on his penis and then there was like extra hair right there. And he totally missed it. Does that throw you off completely? Mutton chops? Is that what they're called? A penis. Yeah. Ew. No? That'd be interesting. I mean, have you been with a guy that had maybe like, what do they call? I mean, could a guy have a landing strip? Does that happen? Yeah. Have you been with a guy that was like that? Well, kind of. I mean, it wasn't like, it wasn't so neatly touched up. I think it's so sexy when like Asian guys, especially. Because they're not really like that. Yeah. Yeah. They're not really hairy. Yeah. It's just a little bit of hair. It's just so perfectly placed. And I love Asian guys' bodies. If you are Asian, please call in and talk to Melissa. She has a couple of fetishes and the fantasies she would want to work out with you at 1-800-893-9562. Also, I want to test my theory. I want to see if I can cram some Skittles in my mouth around your cock. I think the Asians are calling. I think they're calling. All right. We'll see here. Skittles in my mouth around your cock. Hi, caller. Who's this? Hello? Wrong number? I think I heard them playing you back to yourself. That's one of those weird, creepy stalker people. I think there was a delay and they didn't know. Whoever it was, call back. Call back and turn your radio down, please. Okay. So anyways, we were talking about the jazzling. I think I heard them. I think I heard them. I think they were jazzling, like pussies being shaved or not, right? Mm-hmm. But naturally for you, would you rather have it like, would you do like a landing strip? Would you just trim it? Yeah. I keep it nice and clean down there. That's good. There's a little something, but if any guy, not any guy, but if any guy- An Asian guy? An Asian guy? That one special guy? you with like a whole bush of oh my god how about that that makes sense I like to stay prepared I think you've inspired me I've been thinking about this I never really the thought of shaving you never have have you no I shave it but I don't really put a lot of time or attention like it's not a priority but I just decided I'm going to try to do a design next time I shave are you going to show it off on the next show maybe if I can do a pot leaf I'll take a picture of it I'll try and if I can do something awesome like that I'll take a picture of it oh my god you could fat vajazzle around the edge oh with green yes you could dye it you could chalk it I'll get glitter and make smoke rising up like all the way to my breasts this sounds amazing this is like a whole Halloween costume you're inspiring me your talks of shaving and my love of weed have combined beautiful that's what we do inspiring people yeah alright we've got another caller hi caller what's your name it's Keith Furstenberg hey Keith Furstenberg how's it going alright I don't know if I haven't got through yet I don't know where he is you know Jersey boys take a few how are you doing tonight um okay it seems like we're showing a lot of people I'm talking about pussy we're talking a lot about dick yeah we're just building up to it okay what do you like when you are with a girl for the first time I'm sorry when you're with a girl for the first time and you get down there what do you like to see oh it's gotta be shaving all the way yeah hell yeah alright let's see I think we have another call here so let's see if we can get him through okay we're working on it all the way shaved that doesn't throw you off no not at all I could get right in there okay would you would you tell a girl to shave it all the way if she wasn't not the first time second or third okay leave little hints leave the razor yeah leave the razor out just leave it laying around with a little cream shaving cream shaving cream work it out interesting is there a second caller on the line that can hear us I don't know can you hear me hey Henry how's it going do we have two callers on the line hey Henry what's up look at this dude party line at skid row studios okay so that check out that check out that check out that check out that technology Henry told me a theory on vagina okay tell us I can I get I can say pussy you can say whatever you want all right so just to introduce you guys we have Keith Furstenberg from New York who does have electricity and we've got Henry Cruz from New Jersey both of you guys are comedians and what you're working on a show together yes we have a show on Friday yeah I hear you do you want to take that Henry am I working on the show with you I don't know Keith we have a show on Friday yeah well you take the pitch Henry what's the name of the show trainwreck comedy we have a show on Friday at 8 o'clock triple crown I can't tell when Keith is talking so I might be talking over him I gotcha okay we'll address the questions to each of you okay I can't hear you okay I'm talking Henry when you go down on a girl for the first time what do you like to see well you know it's been a minute since I've gone down on a girl I'm sure that would tell you I don't think I've been into the pussy trail it's probably since college so I switch teams okay what do you like to see down there I think you know like a trim if I remember correctly the time that I did enjoy the pussy was probably like a trim but see you know what you guys get all crazy because you don't even worry about just that area it gets into bears otters what else is there I know all this I know all about this that's funny Keith calls me the comedy bear I think that's a gay term when you get a certain it's a man with gay person yeah it is the hairy gay guy and he's definitely the man in the gay relationship I think that's a good question I think that's a good question I think that's a good question it is I see. Okay. So you know what? We have a whole other show for the top and the bottom and the whole thing. No, actually, it's really interesting because you guys have this entire culture that a lot of people don't know about. I mean, you have it all worked out. If male and female couples could categorize it so nicely the way you guys have it worked out. Well, it's awesome. I'm like behind the lines with Henry. I'm like behind the lines. He tells me all the gay shit. I know all of it. It's awesome. I'm like right there. Do you enjoy hearing about it? It's formative. You know, when things get a little bit too close, you know what's going on. So if you're in the situation, you're like, oh. Yeah, that's a penis. Yeah. Okay. No thanks. No, respectfully, of course. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I mean, would you be a little bit flattered if that was the case? Hell yeah, I would be. Oh, yeah. Hey, what are you doing, Deb? I love it when girls hit on me. It's kind of hot. It's a little bit different, I think, when a guy hits on a guy and a girl hits on a girl. Why? Yeah, I think when a girl hits on a girl, it's kind of cool now. I have a niece and she tells me about girls that hit on her. And she's like, it's okay. She's flattered, but I don't think a guy would feel the same way. I remember my ex was hit on once and she started telling me about it. And she was like, weirded out about it. And I was like, tell me more, tell me more. I was telling her if I was hit on, she wouldn't want to hear more and more and more. She'd be like, oh, okay, big deal. I wanted to hear details. I was like, shit, you know. Someone got excited. That was me. What the hell is going on over there? We got our hard hats on. There's actually construction going on next door to the studio. And I don't think they anticipated someone doing a show at this point. Hang on the wall or something. No, I'm going to make Melissa scream as loud as she can in a minute. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I'm going to get into it. Okay, guys. So let's stay on topic here like we never have before. So the show is on Friday. I like talking about pussy, though, even though I've never, well, I have, but I haven't recently. And I left the topic. Well, get ready. I'm going to blow your mind. Did you know women can have one of two types of orgasms? They can have clitoral, which is external, easier to reach. If a guy uses. If a guy uses his hips the right way. I heard jujitsu guys are especially adept at making this happen. And then there's also a vaginal orgasm, which is internal by stimulating the G spot. It's a little more difficult, I think, but there's special toys. There's also a squirting orgasm. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. We're going to get there. Alex is so ready for this. Actually, let me ask you. Have you been with a girl that squirted before? By accident. Yes. I don't know what the hell I did. And how was that? Did you feel like she was pissing on you? It freaked me out. I didn't know what the hell was happening. Did she know what was happening? There was a squirting orgasm. I was back in, I was like 19, a long time ago. And the girl started squirting. I was like, what the fuck is that? I didn't know they could do that. Did you kind of pat yourself on the back and say, hello, my boy? I don't know why you had to do a little bit of research, but yeah, I found out that it was good. And I was actually, Melissa, I'm wondering if this is an investment. I was actually watching a video on this yesterday. They have a video that will teach you how to give a girl a squirting orgasm for $200. Wait, is this the one with the bottle of salad oil and the massage table? I have not seen the video yet. I have not invested the $200 yet. I want to find out. I want to find this video. I saw it before. It's this girl just like laying out on a massage table. And this dude has like salad oil. And they're both completely greased up, right? I think so. And he's like, this is how you do this. See what I'm doing here? You just do this. You just do this. It's the most awkward video. It's one of those things you don't forget. Much like your first time squirting. Now, actually, we do have a squirting expert. In studio. Mindy. I've been dubbed this. Okay. I have one question I'm dying to ask. What? Can you turn it off and on? That? Yeah. Actually, it just takes a lot more work to get there than it does to get to the other types of orgasms. It takes hard work and determination. But is it something that you could control or is it easier if somebody's helping you or assisting you? I really only, aside from like two times, do it when I'm whacking it by myself. So, because you could control it, right, at that point? Yeah, because I know what to do. Is it more of a... Can you do it as a party trick? No. Like on cue? No. Christmas party. I'm not all like, hey, people I don't know, watch me do this. See, because, okay, I've never done it. But I was with this guy who... Who just knew what to do with his fingers. Yeah. And like, I feel like it was really getting there. But, like, my feet were getting really hot for some reason. But I just couldn't get to that point because I couldn't get over thinking about how much laundry I was going to have to do. Aw. It's not always that much. Or you can try it in the bathtub where you don't have issues or lay down a towel. So, a towel would be sufficient? Because I've got a lot of layers of sheets and things. Yeah. Yeah. Or be on the carpet or on the floor or something. Carpet. Don't wash the sheets. Just get it on the carpet. Well, hopefully you have tiles or something. Why are you going to lay on cold ass tiles trying to pull out these advanced techniques? I don't know. Do it on the kitchen table. That's the most smart, creakiest kitchen table you've ever seen. So that wouldn't work. But then you've got to go get a new kitchen. Kitchen table. That's the only issue with that. Yeah. I could probably use a new kitchen table anyway. I'll do it on the couch and then I'll set it up. Well, here's your... I have a question that might help you. When you masturbate, do you stop after one orgasm? Usually. Okay. Okay. Because I'm usually in a hurry. Trying to get off the floor. Yeah. That's why I don't... I don't know. I just have like super epic like, let me light some candles. All right, Mindy. Where's my special toys? What's the music? Sometimes I'm just like, oh man, I just got home from work. I have to go somewhere else. What can I do to release some stress? Yeah. You know what? I've got a whole box full of toys. I use one of them. Yeah. I don't have any real toys. I use a butcher knife handle. I do. What? That's awesome. Just when I thought I've heard it all. Is the knife still attached? No, it was the rubber handle covering. Mindy. I took it off. My fingers fit in it. Girl, I'm going to hook you up. I'm going to help you out. I don't take used supplies. Trust me. I've got a lot of new stuff too. Okay. So Mindy actually recycled her butcher knife. You know, the old saying. Handle. Handle. Not the knife. You're so earth friendly. Aw. Aw. More like I'm trying to save some money here. Trying to save money. Oh, I'll just give you a hint. A good thing that works. Like if you are trying to do this and you're in the bathtub or shower. Like your razor shaving handles. They're like specially like shaped in a way. Like if I guess the brand I get, but. What's the brand? I think it's like probably like one of the higher class Bic brands or something like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is it disposable or like. Yeah, but it's like curved in something. So it has just like a little curved handle. I know what you're talking about. That's perfect for going in and up. Like what you need to do. Fancy. I kind of love the woman to buy that one. Yeah. Right. Right. Just some girl. I'm not going to spend all the money on a high end. Of course. Razor. No way. I could shave my legs and whack it. All at once. But don't you. I don't know. I don't really like doing it in the shower because then I have to concentrate on not slipping. Oh. And I put a lot of work into my hair. There's a lot of products that go into that. Yeah. I mean, I'm usually. I'm usually watching porn. Not always. In the shower? When I whack it. Melissa will turn into pruning at that point. All right. I saw guys only watch porn. Oh, no. Porn is huge. How often do you ladies watch porn a week? Would you say? I think he's talking to me. Four to five days. Probably. Four to five days? Yeah. Like an hour, two hours, three hours a day? 20 minutes? Oh, no. It depends. Like on my days off, if I'm home alone and bored, I might like watch it like three different times throughout the day, maybe for like 20 minutes each time. But usually like it's like a stress thing. Like I came home from one job. I got to go to the next. My boyfriend's at work. I'll do some yoga. I'll play some drums. I'll whack it. I feel great. Perfect. It takes 20 minutes. No, that's like multiple sessions. It depends. I don't know. Sometimes I sit and enjoy the porn. I watch the whole thing and like pay attention to like the ladies kissing each other or like the storyline. The storyline. But sometimes I just like go straight for like. The money shot. Yeah. Like the money shot. And like, OK, I got five minutes. I got to go get on the train. What am I going to do here? Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Quarantine storyline? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Sometimes. There's some fantastic acting going on in porn. Speaking from experience, I think they do have storylines, at least in the initial outset. Oh, yeah. You know what, Henry? Why don't you tell us your experience? Oh, I worked as a adult video porn producer in a prior existence. So I have some experience in the portal world. Is that what turned you? I don't know. Well, I think, you know, maybe I did direct a all lesbian. I did a video direction, a director. I directed a video for Vivid Video on their all girl video. And I think that possibly that could have turned me. That's what did you in, huh? All that pussy in the room. And they use a lot of toys. Actually, toys is like a whole other show within itself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Actually toys is like a whole other show within itself. There's so many different things out there. The strap-ons are very popular. Oh no. You know what? There's the strap-ons without the straps. Like the underwear ones? No, no. It's called like the field-o or the real-do or something. It's like got the donger thing, but then it's got a part that a girl puts up inside. Oh yeah. So it's kind of like the double dildo, but shaped- Kind of, yeah. It's shaped kind of like an L. Like an attachment. Yeah, that looks cool. I'm going to use it on you. You're talking to Mindy, right? Bend over, boy. I'll take it like a champ. Only if you give it, Melissa. I'll give it. Give it again. The double-sided dildo where one woman inserts it in one woman and another one inserts it in the other, and they kind of push on each other, and that creates a sexual experience. That's kind of hot, actually. One of the first porns I ever saw that was in there. No wonder you're all into anal and squirting and everything. You've been experienced from the beginning, huh? Yeah, I discovered porn at an early age. You've seen it all. You've done it all. All right, so you guys, do you have anything else you want to tell us? Anything you want to promote your show or anything? I think if you're in New York and you're listening to this. Are we talking at the same time? Yes, we are. Okay, I'll let Keith talk. Okay, Keith, tell us about the show. All right, we have a show Friday at Triple Crown, which is 330 7th Avenue here in New York. If you're in the area, stop by. If you're from out of town, fly in. And it starts at 8. It's going to be a great show. You can follow us on Twitter at Comedy Rec. And for myself, F.U. Keith. And for Henry, Henry Cruz 101. Perfect. Thank you so much, guys. Thanks for talking to you. We will talk soon. Thank you. Have a good night, guys. Have a good night. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. That was awesome, actually. That was kind of awesome. To get both sides of the story. Yeah. We should do a gay show. We should. It'll be awesome. Okay, now we had an email question because someone uses our email. What's our email again? It is oralstem at gmail.com. Also Twitter at oralstem. Facebook, I'll bet you can guess what it is. Okay, so someone emailed us. And they asked if they can make their girl come anally. Really? Yes. Is that possible? Yeah. You've never done the anal thing, so you can't really answer that question. I haven't done it, but I do know that it doesn't take insertion to get a girl to come. I mean, you can do it through nipple stimulation. If a girl's really turned on, I mean, it's not going to take a lot. Mm-hmm. So, yes. I would say try it anally and see what happens. So, not only... Well, going back to like the whole G-spot versus the clit, right? Mm-hmm. Are you more of a clit girl or are you more of like a G-spot girl? It's definitely all about the clit. The clit for you? Yeah, because when I'm alone, I don't even mess around in there. At all? No. So, you're more of a clitoral stimulation? Yeah. So, if a guy was like eating you out and he was kind of like finger banging you, would you... Could you get like a clitoral stimulation? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Could you get like a multiple sensation that way or are you just trickling? Okay. This guy. Okay. With his fingers. Okay. We went there. I think the game's over. All this talk, I just had to turn on my vibrator. Is that what it was? You guys can't see what's going on. It's under my table. Industrial. Mindy, are you more of a screamer? Wow. Have you ever seen the drill though? Yes, I have. I went... Actually, true story. I've been to a bachelor party and they brought one out, a total DeWalt drill with a dildo attached to it and the girls were sitting there drill-doing each other. Shut up. Did they have like buckets of lube? It was an insane experience because... It was... It was... I'll never forget what happened at that thing. I saw one where it was like one person drilling this massive drill though and then there were two dudes like continuously pouring lube and the lady was talking in the Darth Vader voice and just going, drill me, drill me. It was epic. Okay. On that note, we have another call. Hi, caller. What's your name? Hi, who's this? Hi. Hi. This is Mr. Lee. Hi, Mr. Lee. Mr. No, Mr. Lee. All right, Mrs. Lee. Mr. Heng Lee. Okay. What do you have to tell us tonight? I want to call her to tell you I love your topic of the pussy. The pussy. Do you enjoy yourself some pussy lips? No. No. I actually work here. I'm a massage parlor. Oh, so you know about happy ending massage. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I do. But you have to come to the to the massage parlor. Okay. Where are you at? So I can show you how to really do the pussy. Do it. Let's go. So do you want... Yeah, wait, no. Do you do happy ending massage on a girl? On girl? On guy? On guy? On guy? That look like girl? That girl that look like guy? Whatever you want to do, I do pussy. How do you do a happy ending massage on a girl? Oh, with my nose. With your nose? With the tip of my nose. Like Pinocchio? Yeah. You say a lie. You say lie when I go down there. You see what happened? Oh, my God. This is actually a dude, man. Yeah. My name is Butterfly Franco, and I'm actually calling just to say hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Third A. Baby got your money. What's up, Butterfly? How you doing tonight? Doing great, man. I'm sitting here watching the Clippers smash on the Miami Heat. So... Oh, they're in town. The Heat's in town. What's the score in that game? Oh, 89-74. Hold on. Hold on. What was it? 89-74. Wow. So, Butterfly, quick question for you. How do you like your pussy? Nice and stinky. Oh, really? Seriously. No, I'm just playing. I'm just playing. No, I actually... I'm the kind of guy who doesn't really care. I don't care if it's shaved. I don't care if it's 1973 porno status. You'd go down on that? I'll go down on whatever. My nose hairs will get tangled up with that piece of hair down there. Wow. That's committed. Yeah, my little... My handlebar mustache will come out looking crazy once I'm done. It's like a bunch of snails crawled all over my mustache. Oh, God. Yeah, so much about the snail trail. Gee. Oh. So, wait. Okay, do you guys have a technique to deal with a stinky pussy? A huge one? A stinky one. Well, a stinky one. I just hold my breath as much as I can. No. No. No. No. That year, sometimes, sometimes, you know, you go home and you smell your upper lip and you just have, you know, it's like a reminder. It's like something you take home with you. Like, to remember that experience, right? Exactly, exactly, so with... That's really romantic. Well, you know what... Abuelo, it smelled like the taunch, and that's what I... The funny thing is, I have that joke with my friends, like, we'll see a girl, and be like, Oh, damn, she's fine, or blah, blah, blah with the case. And then I would stick my finger to the guy's nose. I'd go, do you want to know what she smells like? And I'd go, boom, right to their nose. Good. Why are guys so gross? No, it's the gift that keeps on giving. You want to, you know, remember it. If it keeps giving, there's a problem. Because that should fade away. It's like promoting a good item. Like, you get like, oh, girl, I just found me this blush that you got to try. You going to show the girls pretty much the same thing, kind of like the same concept. You guys are, wow, what a show. It's just, you know, how I think. Are you a comedian? No, I'm not a comedian. I'm your average Joe who just got something funny to say. Got it. Well, thank you so much for your call. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I really appreciate it. Thanks for calling in, Butterfly. Have a good night. You guys keep on doing a good deed and talking about stank pussy and good pussy and all that. Thank you so much. You got it. Have a good night. All right, guys. You guys have a good night. Thank you. Thanks for calling in. Bye-bye. Wow. I got some random people calling in now. Fill us in, Alex, because I know you've come across some stanky pussy. What do you do? Well, actually, you know what? In talking to him during the whole thing, the one question I wanted to ask all any females, like, how often do you actually douche? Never. Never? No. So you're telling me, have you ever, like, have you ever smelled, like, known that your shit stank? No. Like, gone down there, like, oh. No, because I'm a vegetarian. So that means your pussy doesn't stink? Yeah. Sorry, pardon my ignorance. I'm just questioning. No, yeah, because you know what? It's true. You are what you eat. So if you're clean, if you eat clean, your sweat isn't as nasty. Any kind of... Excretion isn't as intense, you know? If you eat a lot of garlic, if you eat a lot of spicy foods, that'll come out over the next day or two. But there's actually a product called My Maple Cookie Tea that I've tried, and it's got the herb fenugreek in it, and it will make you taste and smell like maple syrup. What? Yes. See, the two things that popped up when you kind of mentioned the whole smell, the smelling and the whole thing, the first thing that popped up was like coffee. If I go get like a cup of coffee from Starbucks, I go piss that out, it smells just like what I just drank. Yeah. Right? And on the opposite end of it, I thought about asparagus. And I don't know what it is about asparagus, but when you go piss that out, the way it goes through your system... It reacts with the chemicals in your body, yeah. And that's some stinky shit. All I really eat is like French fries, so... French fries? Yeah. So maybe in the oil. Peanut oil or something. Well, how about like on your end, a few weeks back, we talked about like, you know, with guys, the whole sperm thing, right? Or I mean, semen. So if a guy... Have you ever been with a vegetarian guy? No. No? So most of them are like meat eaters or whatever the case may be. Yeah. But I don't know. Most guys, I just assume that it's not going to be awesome, but it's just par for the course. Really? Yeah. But have you ever been with a guy where like, oh shit, his shit was good? No. Or the smell wasn't as bad or I mean... No. Is it more like that one was bearable? Yeah. The last... Well... Yeah. Like it didn't taste like a salt lick. No, they all do. It's always been pretty consistently the same except for there was one guy. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't care what... Either one of you said... I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... I think... But JJ can smell a lot worse than a guy's semen. Really? Have you ever tasted Clorox semen? I haven't really tasted semen on purpose to begin with. On purpose. But you have. Yeah. I've exchanged... Ew. Your own? Well, yeah. My own in someone else's mouth back to my mouth. Okay. Yeah. Not like your friend across the room or something. I like to hear that. That takes a real man. Well, here. Let me talk to you. I mean, it's not like I'm like jacking off on my bed and my legs against the wall. I'm trying to catch it in my mouth. It's not like that at all. Because you know what? I just got that image and I'm pretty sure that's exactly how it is. I would like it to be like that. But no, I mean, it was one of those things where, you know, you get caught up in the moment. The whole sharing is caring thing. But I mean, I've been with some girls where that shit just isn't right. It just stinks. You know what? Actually, I was with a guy before who would not let me near him if I had any of his secretion on me. Oh, he was so grossed out. I don't know. But I was with this other guy who would let me go down on him and then kiss him. So hot. Like right after? Yeah. No, no, he wouldn't come or anything. But, you know, just the whole like back and forth thing. It's so like intimate. It's so hot. It's so like trusting. And just in the moment. See, I think that's the difference. I think that, I mean, I've said this in past shows. I think that's the difference of like liking someone and loving someone. When you love someone, you don't give a fuck. You'll go that extra mile. If you like them, you're like, I like you, but I don't love you. Yeah, but what if it's just like, not that I would ever do this. But what if it was just like a one-time thing or it was the first time you're with them and they let you do that? Then are they just a freak? I agree with you. Because I have a friend that does the whole Dominique Wilkins thing. He'll go like from like from there. Pussy to their mouth. Yeah. I mean, if you get caught up in the moment, I could totally see how that could happen. So, yeah, I mean, the clean freak guy, it just, it was, it was too much. It was like, it made it awkward and like clinical almost. It was. Maybe he worked in a hospital. Trust me, he didn't work in a hospital. I don't know. Some people are very like obsessive compulsive. About that stuff. You know, like they're got the whole like bacterial gels and everything. I know, but it's just sex. Just let it be. Just have fun with it. We have a caller. Hi, caller. What's your name? Hi, my name is Richard. Hi, Richard. Okay. Okay. I, I know you guys are having a lot of fun there. Okay. But, you know, I'm listening to this radio station. And I am just. Appalled. At the stuff. That I am listening to. And you guys are talking about. Licking each other's cum. And putting, making squirts come out of the vagina. And I mean, is this the kind of radio station that we have going on? Is this the new face of radio? I am just appalled. And offended. And I never. And my children are listening to this. Well, turn it off. You. They are crying. Okay. You should ask your children if they want a squirt. Mike, how dare you? That is. I'm talking about the delicious beverage. We serve it here in our studio. The soda. Oh, you mean the soda pop. Yeah, we have a dispenser that dispenses squirt right here in the soda. You were confused. That's the squirt we were talking about. Huh? Well, if that's the case, then. What is my face red? Oh, I mean, I. I don't know where my brain is. If that's what if that's the case and I'm hearing. You know, female ejaculate. And you guys are just talking about squirt. Okay. No, it's totally innocent. My apology. Yeah. No, we're good. We're good. Well, listen, Dick, you have a choice. All right. And we do appreciate you. Excuse me. Hold on. One second. What did I. What did the homosexual man tell me right now? We got to go. Thank you for calling. Isn't his name Richard? I don't know. Anyway, that's our time. That was our mess of a show tonight. We actually got a lot covered in a little bit of time. I guess. And we got some construction done. Pussy could be an ongoing topic here. I think so. Actually. And you know what goes well with pussy is penis. And we talked about a lot of penis, too. Perfect. Yeah. Next, we're going to have to play an intro about. Dick. Thanks for listening, guys. Have a good night, everybody. I'm sorry.