Dating out of your league, Vegas stories, and a caller's wealthy ex

Straight up now tell me do you really want to love me forever? Oh, oh, oh Or is it just a hit and run? We got a good day What's up my friends? It is Oral Stimulation. You are listening to us of course on XM165 in collaboration with Skid Row Studios.com I am Melissa and as always I am joined by my luscious co-host Alex. How's it going tonight Alex? I'm doing fine. Thanks for asking yourself. It's so good to see you again. It's always nice to see you as well. I missed you last week but I do have all the dirty details from Vegas. Like filthy dirty or like naughty dirty? No, these are pretty innocent. Definitely not like your herpes episode. I'm still laughing about that. I'm not. That's not awkward. I'm not awkward at all. Has she tried to call you at all or anything? No, I left it at that. She wanted to kind of hook up and I really admired that she was honest and told me she had herpes and at that point I was like deuces I'm out. Thank you. Yeah. I couldn't carry that on any further. No, that makes sense. All right. So we have Vegas coming up. Coming up? Well, I mean, yeah, I'm going back to Vegas again. Really? I'm sure you are too. Maybe St. Patrick's Day I think. Are you serious? Yeah. I'm going to be out there then too. Are you serious? Are we going to be in Vegas at the same time? Oh, shut up. We should seriously go get married. Dude, we got to hook up. Yeah. It's going to be amazing. Dude, I can't wait to give you anal. Oh my God. Okay. Wait. That just escalated like out of control there. I'm sorry. I just started talking. We were going to get married then all of a sudden it's anal? I can't help it. I want to be your first. You will be. Okay. Oh, you definitely will be. I can't wait. Okay. All right. So? I'm going to go buy that ring pop tonight. Oh my God. Are we getting married? Do you like cherry grape? This was an on-air proposal, wasn't it? I'm down on both knees right now. I'm so in love with you. Are you unbending it? I didn't even give you an accent yet. Oh yeah. We'll get to that. Dude, in Vegas, little preview. I was hooking up with this Chinese guy. Hooking up. Define hooking up. You know. Like you guys were like, giving each other goo goo eyes. I mean. No, like banging. Banging? Yeah. Like finger banging? No. Like phone banging? No. Like doing the nasty in between the sheets? Yeah, like naked. What? I know, right? So you got down? Mm-hmm. In Vegas? Yeah. Why are you making it sound so... No, I'm excited. Tell me about it. Okay. Well, it was good. Well, we'll get to it. We'll get to it. But I'm just saying, if he had... How do you like, how do you like lean me up to it? And then like, oh, we'll get to it later. We'll get there. But if he had, if any guy would speak to me in an Asian accent in bed, like in their native language, do you know how much I would lose it? You are the only person that I know has this Asian fetish. Oh my God. Seriously, if I Google Asian fetish, your face would pop up. You're the only person I know. Hopefully oral stimulation would pop up too, yeah? Hopefully. If you are looking to pop up with us, follow us on Twitter at Oral Stim, Facebook.com slash Oral Stimulation Radio. And of course you can get right to us, Oral Stim at gmail.com. If you want to call in and speak to me with an authentic Asian accent, call us at 800-893-9562. I'm going to start like putting your phone number and like when I go like to Chinatown or if I go like Little Saigon, all those places when I go eat. In the bathroom? I'm just going to call for a good time. Dude, we should just put the flyers out. Your flyers. So what's up with this proposal? I thought there was a wedding proposal going on. Yeah, I think we're getting married on St. Patrick's Day. I found something special for you guys. Oh, okay. What do you got? I got a gift. He's always hooking us up. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Wait, this is the wrong song. No, this is good. This is good. This is good. This is good. This is what you said. You're down on bended knee. He knows. Girls always know what's up. This is the end of the road. No. No, it's not. This is bended knee. Do you not know your boys to men? Don't you know? I'm your future wife and you don't even know boys to men? Here we go. The big horse. Here it is. Here it is. Is the camera on? I'm going to go down on my knee right now. Oh. I'm going to put your legs up in the air. Whoa. Get down on those bended knees. We're doing well. We're doing well. Wedding and honeymoon all in one? Oh, yeah. Oh, my gosh. I hope the ceremony lasts about five minutes because I want to throw you or would it like lift you up and carry you through the threshold? Yes. Oh, yeah. Where are we going to stay? I don't care. Motel 6. I only need like an hour. I can't marry you if you're going to hook me up with Motel 6. What? All of a sudden there's my criteria? Oh, yeah. Dude, I'm Filipino. I'll shave my head. I'll pretend to have an accent. What else? Do you know? I don't need. You're doing good so far. I'll pretend to make love to you when you want me to. You'll pretend? Well, sing. I can't sing. I'll lip sync. Okay. Like Beyonce or something. That would be hot, kind of. Oh, yeah. Whatever. Speaking of the Super Bowl. But I'm going to make you go on top. No. Oh, yeah. I have a lazy. I have a lazy whore story for you. Someone had the balls to call me a lazy whore while they were fucking me. What? Only I could call you a lazy whore. I'm a lazy whore. Nobody else. Can you believe that shit? That's fucked up. I know. I can't even believe it. After all we've been through, somebody else is using my shit. Oh, I'm so angry right now. We have fans and they take it to the extreme. That's good. I'm glad people listen. Right? And I'm glad somebody could agree that it wasn't just me, that you are a lazy whore. Listen. You listen. I'll take the whore part. But lazy, it's just really, it just really gets me. Okay. What would you rather be called than a lazy whore? I don't know. I'll let you pick. Oh God. I don't know. We'll look up some synonyms for lazy. Okay. Anyway, back to the super world. I heard there was a blackout in a Scientology commercial. Okay. Is that all? That's it. Okay, cool. So there was also another commercial though. There was Bar Raffaele and some dude. And they were totally gossips. Going at it. Making out for some website. The godaddy.com commercial? Yeah, yeah. So I would tend to say that she was way out of his league. Okay. Yeah. Well, I don't know. They might have had like a special connection. They might have. Besides their lips. That's what we're going to get into tonight is dating out of your similarity. Way different age or maybe different economic class. Yes. Or are you getting the notes right now? Or if a guy is way hotter than a girl or a girl's way hotter than the guy. Okay. I hope you're ready. I'm ready. But first, I have a little issue with some cereal that I want to discuss with you. How do we go from that to cereal? I'm just telling you what we're going to get into. I just have to get this out of the way. All right, hurry up. Just so I could get into that ass. I had a bowl of cookie crisp today because it looked like it had chocolate in it. And that shit is nasty. What? Yes. It's terrible. But don't you remember as a kid, freaking a bowl full of cookies was like liquid gold? I was more of a Fruity Pebbles type of guy. I wasn't big on cookie crisp. Really? Really? This is the guy I'm going to marry in a couple weeks? Oh, yeah. What are you setting me up with here, Austin? Well, I'm setting you up for the whole gay. Okay. Marriage in the UK part. Yes. Okay. Duh. That's what you. What a smooth transition. Fruity Pebbles. So tell me about it. The UK is well on their way to legalizing gay marriage. Yes. Yay. Party leaders voted and they're going to go for it. I mean, they're in favor of it. And there was like a majority in the past. Really? Yeah. And so now it's like crazy. The UK is going to have a whole bunch of out of the closet. Yeah. I mean, I mean, I'm not going to lie. I mean, I'm not going to lie. I mean, I'm not going to lie. I mean, I'm not going to lie. I mean, I'm not going to lie. I mean, I'm not going to lie. I mean, I'm not going to lie. Gay marriages. They won't be hidden. What's an in the closet gay marriage? Well, I mean, they could come out and actually like take pride. And I mean, not that they're proud already, but as far as like getting married. I mean, I think that's like if you love someone. We talked about marriage not too long ago. It seems like a theme for the night. Like 30 seconds ago. Yeah. Oh, yeah. What size is your ring finger anyways? It's like a six. I have really slender fingers. Of course you would know. Every size is off the top of your head. How often do you ask that? Quite a few times, actually. You know what? I think it's kind of cool because at least, you know, that's something that they could, you know, you could actually get married. I mean, like for like a man and a woman. I mean, it happens all the time. But for like a gay couple, for them to kind of take to the next level as far as that goes. Personally, I think it's completely ridiculous that people are banned from marrying anyone. I mean, of legal age, obviously. But it's like a person is a person. I agree. Every person is an individual. They all have thoughts, feelings, ideas along the gay spectrum, the straight spectrum, whatever. You know, I mean, it's just, it's absurd to me that there are people who are so concerned about what other people are doing in love. Well, there's like a lot of politics. There's a lot of politics involved. I mean, you could go like, I mean, you could go, first thing that comes to mind was like the Bible, you know, like different things. Like there's a lot of different views that come to that. You know, they say you shouldn't eat shellfish in the Bible too. Okay. And you should own slaves. And you should what? You should own slaves. Okay. I'm just saying, I don't want to get biblical on you on XM165. I'm just trying to get educated. In collaboration with Skid Row Studios.com. However, there are a lot of things the Bible says to do. And not to do. But that's not the point of the show, Alex. The point of the show is to grow in our glowing love for each other and celebrate that if I was a dude and you were a dude, we could totally get married in the UK, hopefully. Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. Like right now. Yes. Show me your tits. You want to see them right now? Yeah. I'll totally show you. Okay, here we go. I'm still not happy about the cookie crisp though. Oh my gosh. Right? Right? No one's around. No one's looking. Mindy saw. I don't know if Mindy liked them. I didn't saw. You might want to redo them again. Yeah. Yeah. Show them. Put them up against the glass. Yeah, you have to show Mindy. That's like the eighth time I've done it tonight. Okay. I'll show Mindy too. I got to see that. Really? Okay. I'll describe. Is the camera on? Okay. What do you got, Mindy? I see them. They're nice. Oh yeah. What do her nipples look like? They're good size. Good size. Good size nipples. We have a request from the sound booth. Yes. Against the glass. Against the glass. Ew. Maybe later. I'll show you guys later. Well, thank you very much for that. I didn't even have to get a dollar bill out. I know. I feel swanky. Oh, Mindy, later. Mine against this side. Yours against that side. Oh, what? Speaking of marriage, Vegas is, of course, the marriage capital. Okay. I was just there. I have to give a shout out to Ryan and Yassine. Shout out to Ryan and what? Yassine. Yassine? Dude, I hear his name like 3,000 times a day. Why? From his dad. It's so adorable. These are the guys I work with at the luxury lights booth. Okay. And his dad just says his name over and over and over and over. Is he like yelling at him? Is he calling at him? Yeah, he's calling him. He needs information or whatever. They're so cool. Oh, I love working with those guys. Seems like a lot of fun. Did you have a lot of fun with those guys? It is a lot of fun. However, I was exhausted. Okay. The whole time. The whole time. They wore you out. Yeah. And then cutie Chinese guy wanted to hook up. Cutie Chinese guy. He's so cute. He's so cute. Was he out there for the convention or did he just come out to see you? He just came out to hang out. Yeah. He had some work to do. Work on that ass. No, but anyways, so we hooked up. I was so tired. And then after we were done, he looks at me, he goes, Oh, yeah. You really are a lazy whore. Yeah. Oh, I almost died. So the Chinese guy called you a lazy whore? Yes. So the rumors are true. No, I was really tired. Okay. I was really tired. But did he even try to like flip you over like doggy style? Yeah, I mean, I moved and whatever, but. Yeah, moved what? Side to side? I wasn't like really trying. At all? Dude, I was really tired. Well, I guess if you've been working. You don't understand. You don't understand. You don't understand. You don't understand. You don't understand. Whereas you've been reading like a magazine or watching TV. I thought I was going to die of kidney failure on the way out there. Wait, what? That's serious. First of all. And that just really wore me out. Which is intense. I could see that. Thank you. Yeah. It's a long time. But are you okay? I mean. I mean, yeah, I guess. Yeah. Doesn't hurt anymore. So it hurt that one time. It's not like a stone or nothing. I mean, did you get it checked? I mean. No, I didn't get it checked. It just went away. So. Okay. Let's go back to the sex story. So, I mean, did he try to fuck you? Yeah. Did he try to flip you around? I mean. Yeah, he did. I moved. No, like doggy style. Did he go roll you over and go on top? Yeah. He did everything. So you went on top? I'm proud of you. No, I did not go on top. Okay. Everything but that. Everything does not include being on top. You know what? That's your goal for next week. That your homework is to fuck a guy on top. He's balanced like a little jackrabbit. Do a little reverse cowgirl. Actually. Remember the Thai guy? Yeah. Okay. So I have this chair in my living room. I think I've told you this before. I've seen it. It's like a lounge chair. Yeah. Yeah. So I was on top of him on that because then I can have my feet on the ground and bounce. Wait. So did you do it or you're going to do it? Yeah, I did do it. Like recently? No, like a couple months ago. That doesn't count. Was it before or after the lazy whore episode? It was well before. Yeah. It doesn't count. I gave up after that guy. Whatever. I don't even care right now. You're out of control. I do what I can. Yeah. But in Vegas, we also went to the ghost bar and I ended up meeting this really cute guy. Business owner. He was cute and he wasn't even Asian. He was just that cute. Okay. Okay. Like, you know. Describe him. Describe him. If he's like any celebrity. So our listeners can have an idea. I don't know celebrities. He looked kind of like East Coast. He was like really like buff. What? Like. That's a thing. Like. East Coast. He's like non. Like Jersey. Like Jersey. Jersey Shore guy. Yeah. But non-cartoony. Like non-cartoony Jersey Shore. That's what he reminded me of. Okay. Okay. Was he tan? Like dark? A little bit. Yeah. But I think that was natural. Okay. Did he have like a muscle shirt on or something? No. I think he was wearing a t-shirt. I don't know. Did he say like cabs are here? No. T-shirt time? No. So. He did not mention laundry or anything like that. So. We. But he was DTF. Yeah. Yeah. No. Because he has a girlfriend. He is. Like. Yeah. But anyway. Good job homewrecker. Shut up. I didn't know that until after. After I talked to him for a while. So I'm talking to him and he's got his own business and he's like all successful and cool. And I'm like please. Please. Please don't be 26 years old. I'm just begging him. I'm like please do not be young. Please God don't be young. Because all these guys I know are so awesome and they're so much younger than me. So much younger. Yeah. Aren't you like 28 anyways? I wish. Yeah. Yeah. I'm something like 28. But. So. There's so much younger than me. And I'm like please just don't be 26. He's like no. No. I'm not 26. I'm not 26. I was like okay cool. And he pulls out his license. Dude he's freaking 25. Like no. But he sounds really successful. Like a lot of young guys are successful. I know. But here's my problem. My ex-boyfriend. Okay. Was two years younger than me. And it was fine at first. And then the more serious the relationship got. The less serious he got. And then the more often he would pull out this. I'm only 28. Going on 18. You know. I'm only. I'm only this. I'm only that. Like he acted like being 28 was the equivalent to like just getting out of high school. So I'm very scared. To actually get into a relationship with a much younger guy. Because what if that happens again? Because like when I was in my early 20s. I was really responsible. You know. Married. You know. You know. You know. And all this stuff. And then as I got to my later 20s. I was like. With that I kind of want to live my life. You know. I want to have more fun. Let your hair down. Let loose. Exactly. So I'm scared that I'm going to meet this younger 20s guy. Who's all mature and successful. And then as he hits 30. He's going to be like. Why am I with you old lady? And then he's going to kick me to the curb. And then I'm going to have wasted all that time. Well. At least you have like little flags that pop up. I mean. You have little feelers. Or like. To see what you want or don't want. I think. I think that's crucial. Yeah. But I think all of the guys who are my age. Are married. Yeah. All the good ones. So now I'm just going to have to wait. Until they start getting divorced or something. How does that work out? Not that well. Not that well for me at all. Well. Even if they're divorced. I mean. Are you okay with that? I mean. A guy who's divorced? Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Because I mean. I'm sure there's ties to the ex. I mean. If they have kids. The whole thing. I mean. I don't mind. You're okay. Everyone has a past. Yeah. You know. And if that comes into the current. All you can do is just celebrate. That that's what helped make them who they are now. So you're understanding toward it. Absolutely. I mean. I learned so much from my exes. That I can apply. And be a better person in a relationship. Now. You know. I don't have anything against a guy being divorced. Or having kids. Or anything like that. That's good. What about you? What about me? Have you dated any old ladies? Yeah. A few years older. Yeah. What's the oldest? Like the biggest separation? Gosh. I don't know. Probably like. I don't know. Maybe like six, seven years older than me. How old were you at the time? Should I? I'm trying to think. Because I'm. How old now? No. Actually. It was probably. You know. I was probably like in my early 30s. And she was probably like in her 40s. Really? Yeah. And was. Did she have kids or anything? Yeah. She had a daughter. Yeah. Yeah. She had a daughter. And that was it. Okay. Good story. How. No. How. I mean. How long. How long did you guys date? Was it any. Was there a significant difference? As far as. Like. I don't know. The type of music you guys liked. Was she all into disco? And you really like Backstreet Boys? Or. Backdoor Boys. More like it. No. It wasn't even like that at all. Actually. I think. You know. When you have like a connection with someone. It's different. Like the age. I don't think. Like really matters. I think. You know. Certain things. You have to like remind yourself. It's like. She probably was thinking like. You know. Obviously looking at me. I'm thinking of like. I don't know. Like you're right. Maybe I'm listening like to hip hop. Or like to rap. And she's probably more into like the cranberries. Or some shit like that. Cranberries. You never heard of the cranberries? No. Oh my gosh. I need to keep you up on. Well. I think I've heard of it. But I might be getting it confused with the fruit. I'm sorry. Do you know who? I don't know. How about like Alanis Morissette? Yeah. I know her. I know her. What's one song she sang? The one about spoons and rain. Yeah. Okay. Yes. Can I give you that? Yes. All right. Of course. You know what an activity that people across all ages can enjoy? Eating. Yes. But also shopping on adamandeve.com. What about that? If you use promo code Skid Row. You get a sweet discount. And then you can stuff a vibrator in your old lover. My old lover? Yes. Or you could buy an old man a penis pump. You could. They've got all kinds of good stuff on there. Yeah. I'm trying to get a new flashlight. Really? I have to check it out. Yeah. I would get a sleeve. Really? Yeah. I actually need to look into it. I've never heard of it. Yeah. Because I mean, I've heard flashlights are really good. But if you want to just, if you haven't gone down that road before, try a sleeve. They're pretty inexpensive and they've got different textures. Like one side can be ridged and you can turn it the other way and then that can be bumpy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And don't use too much lube because if you get the lube between your hand and the sleeve, then you're screwed. It's just going to be a mess all over. So you have to keep your hand dry on the outside. Wait, so is it not a mess at the end anyways or is it keep it clean? Yeah, but you can contain it all in there. Okay. But if you just, you know. Okay. I gotcha. I have heard some really good reviews on those. It's cool. I can't wait to write one about myself. Yeah. I gotta check out the website. Do it. Definitely. but you know going back to what we were talking about you are kind of are you dating someone a little bit younger than you? no I've actually dated people usually around my age really? yeah you just keep it because what are you like 35 now? 35 yeah I'll be 36 in June okay so you stick to like the 30s ish? actually you know what I have a tendency to date probably like younger actually the crazy thing is I've been dating kind of older chicks or girls around my age but wait are they older or are they around your age? a little bit of both I mean maybe like a couple years older you know what now that I got older or now that I'm older like I don't really pay attention like if I have a connection with someone and we click I think that's more important to me than anything I know but see it's easier for guys of course it always is it's not fair actually it's easier for girls all I get to say is like hey you want to fuck? okay what guy's going to tell you no? okay sure yeah a guy would love to fuck I have to put in work of course a guy wants to fuck but is he going to want to go home and like hang out with my kids no I don't want just a guy I really yeah who wants to do that it's like I'm going to fuck mommy and then I'm going to take you to school god I just wait you need me to help you with your homework? you know what there's nights I really don't mind sleeping alone like when I take melatonin to fall asleep and it's good because I can just spread out everywhere but there's I just there's times I just really want to be in love of course I mean there's times for me like when I I miss having like a warm body to sleep next to I think that's key I don't really like sleeping next to people I kind of decided I really have like in the past whatever because you've been sleeping next to the wrong guy that's your problem or guys I just I don't know I like falling asleep next to a guy I don't necessarily like waking up next to a guy what's wrong with that? I just want to have my space to be like you know you're not pretty when you wake up you aren't pretty? I'm pretty but most people aren't pretty so I'm just trying to look at it from an outside perspective so you're telling me that you put on this face there's an illusion about you so you go have sex with a guy you just don't want him to see you the next morning because you look like shit? no I don't know yeah that's what you're saying it's just it's really hot in here so I'm about to start taking my clothes off yeah please start with your pants this time I already saw your tits I know why am I even wearing pants? I forgot it was so warm okay you can take off your socks you're listening to me you're listening to me you're listening to me you're listening to me you're listening of course to Oral Stimulation on XM165 in collaboration with skidrowstudios.com I am taking my clothes off I really am I'm watching you I wish I had a couple dollars I'd throw them your way dollars? thanks is that what I'm worth to you? my socks are worth a couple dollars? dude I will turn this place into a hurricane right now with all the ones no yeah oh okay I think you're worth more than that thanks I appreciate that can I get a 3430 by the way? what do you mean? what's that? what's that mean? no it's just strip club lingo oh our local expert here yeah would you ever date a stripper? absolutely just like that just absolutely because they know what to do huh? no I think they're just normal human beings like anybody else like why would that really matter? well because actually someone on Facebook posted a thing about what jobs would you never date someone? and there's a lot of interesting responses people were like I said I would never date someone who deals with dead people really? it's just uh uh but a lot of people were saying like you know what I wouldn't really want to date a guy who works at a desk job either really? mhm you like like guys that are interesting like magicians or comedians yeah guys who have no money what was it about money to you? no but I mean money does come with an office job just like that generally unless you're like in a cube or whatever it's just really hot I'm sorry yeah I'm having a hard time focusing I'm sorry I hope everybody's watching on the cam the live cam is anybody watching? go to the website skidrowstudios.com and watch the video or the live feed watch me take my clothes off yeah what size are your tits anyways? uh like 34D 34D? yeah damn I was gonna say 36 I'm off they use they use they used to be a lot bigger really? yeah yeah I was right at one point I guess yeah sorry I'm sorry am I distracting you? okay no I'm just you know what the funny thing is I mean usually when I sit across from you when we do the show mhm I kind of like pretend to undress you like in my head okay but it's like I have like the whole like Yoda thing on you oh now it's happening yeah I'm like I'm thinking it but you're doing it which is cool lucky you I'm lucky every Wednesday when I get to see you aww you're gonna make such a good husband oh gosh I can't wait what is it in March? March yeah alright I'll get the prenup ready dude if we're serious oh what you don't love me that much? what do you think you're like a baller now? do I just get lucky? oh you do live in a castle I want a bunch of money on the super wall go Ravens ah money money actually what about dating someone from a different economic class? that's interesting you know what there's I mean there's two ways to look at it there's a guy who has way more money which I think generally happens that's typical it's it just works out that way but a woman can kind of get resentful and feel like she's a kept woman if the guy's always paying for everything and it can add up to a debt that she can never repay but at that point does a woman feel like she like owes the guy? you think she feels guilty for it? I mean she could yeah it could either be that or the guy could kind of hold it over her like you know like hey I bought your boobs or something and then at that point you like you feel like you have to be with the guy because he did that for you? yeah like you feel like if you walk away you know he's done all these generous things and so you're you kind of feel obligated to stay with him guilty huh? you know you think that happens a lot in relationships? um and people stay in it for like the wrong reasons or whatever the case may be? I know it really happened in my marriage really? I was a stay-at-home mom and so it was just like I was always indebted to him and then when I got out of it I didn't have the 10 years of working history that he had so it's like you know it's hard to get a job and build myself back up to that level right you pull that sacrifice right? yeah to do that like to like raise the kids and so on and so forth where you I mean instead of maybe advancing in a career like you know school or whatever the case may be you kind of back up a little bit right? yeah absolutely if you guys want to call in and talk about your social class dating call us at 800-893-9562 if a guy happens to be the one with a lot less money it can be awkward for him too because he can feel like you know he can never contribute enough you know what I think a lot of guys are intimidated by that like you know like there's a lot of stuff that's going on in their life like there's a lot of stuff that's going on in their life and they make their own money they do their own thing you know like I remember going on a date like trying to pay for something with a girl and the girl like snapped at me she's like what you don't think I could pay for my own shit? I looked at her like I'm just a gentleman yeah like what? can you let me be a gentleman and pay? you know what? I always try to make sure I have enough money to cover my portion of a date but if a guy actually lets me pay oh I'm taking notes we have a caller on the line all right let's see what our caller has to say hi caller who's this? hey it's Ross Rob, how you doing? Hey, Rob. How's it going tonight? Not too bad. Is this Rob, our good friend from Fanboy Nation? That it is. Awesome. I heard you talking about the economic thing, and I got a doozy for you. Yeah, lay it on us here. Well, I dated this girl who, you know, worked at Target, and I just thought, oh, okay, she works there. I was in grad school. It wasn't a big deal. And then I punched in my GPS to go pick her up, and it turned out that it was in a restricted area. Well, the girl comes from so much money that her whole neighborhood paid that they couldn't be found on a GPS. Like, it was crazy money. I was too scared to even sit on the couch. Is that in Southern California? Yeah, it was in Monarch Beach, right by Dana Point. It's this really ritzy area. Oh, yeah, that's beautiful. If we go on PCH, I can even point to the house from the coast. But you can't access it, can you? Hey, Rob. Not anymore. At that point, are you intimidated by that at all? Like, how, as a guy, like, how do you deal with that? I didn't know how to. I just sat there. I was like, okay, this is cool, whatever. But, you know, to the point where it's like, oh, let's go watch a movie. We have a home theater downstairs, but I want to shoot pool at the same time. And the wall retracted in order to watch the movie in the theater and shoot pool at the same time. It was extremely intimidating. Wait, so this whole wall goes down? The whole wall went down between the theater and the game room. This is her house or her parents' house? Wait, it didn't, like, go down? It didn't, like, go down? It didn't, like, go down? It didn't, like, go down? It didn't, like, go down? It didn't, like, slide? You know, I'm thinking, like, sliding doors. Maybe they go, yeah. No, I'm talking, like, push a button and it goes into the floor. Wow. I mean. Yeah. That's insane. This is a real house? This is a real house, man. Like, you could fit three of my houses into one of hers. What, did it have, like, elevators and all kinds of things, too? It had elevators. No, it did not. Are you serious? Yeah. Where is this girl now? Why aren't you at home? Why aren't you at home cooking her dinner and scrubbing the floors? Because I'm too much of a man's man. I can't be bossed around and I can't be bought. So, it's like, you're trying to push me around and go, I have cash. And I was like, ah, sorry, it doesn't work for me. I got to be the man. So, was it the money that intimidated you or her personality? At first, it was the money, but I got over it. But it was the pushiness with the personality of I can buy the world that got kind of annoying. How long were you with her? Probably about three months. My birthday was the day before hers. And she didn't wish me a happy birthday, so I didn't wish her one either. And then she called me complaining. I was like, yeah, guess what? Turn her about to fair play. Oh, are you serious? Birthdays are such a huge deal for me. Yeah, way to stick it to her. Damn. And how hard is it to forget the person's birthday that's the day before yours? Right? It doesn't get any easier than that. Maybe she thought it was the day after. Who knows? Maybe. A part of me now thinks, God damn it, stupid. You could have been living in the last. Not the luxury. But then my ego as a man goes, no, you're not a housewife. Yeah, because at that point, she might feel like she has you by the balls. You got to be like that little bitch. Exactly. I wasn't going to be a poodle. No. When you guys did go out, did you pay for the dates? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I paid for everything. But it's like, you know, and she was she was cool about it. It's not like she wanted all this luxurious stuff. I mean, she drove a PT cruiser. But just knowing that she had the power to buy the Mercedes dealership was kind of intimidating. Yeah. Damn. Did you feel like you had maybe some cultural overload? Like, did she take you to all the fancy places and just really immerse you in her lifestyle? Or were you guys able to find a common ground? We were able to find a bit of a common ground. But, you know, when you're when you're dealing with her dad, who's got all this cash and he finds out, oh, you're in grad school and you're going to start an online magazine. Uh-huh. There's money in that. Like, it just got to the point of money became the conversation. Oh, yeah. That's hard. That's especially hard when you get parents involved. Yeah. Speaking of conversation, like, what were your conversations like, Rob? Well, like, I remember when I went to first pick her up because I'm walking to the door. I was like, am I sure I got the right house? Because you work at Target. And I had these 20 foot double door stained glass oak things. I'm just like, OK, yeah, I guess I'm here. And the Italian marble that was shipped over and then the dining room table set 18 people. And it was made from one tree. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy Yeah so the first date was rather intimidating So after that I mean Did you know right away Were you like thinking like I want to marry this girl Or are you thinking like I'm out of my league Like we were kind of mentioning earlier Financially I thought I was out of my league but personality We clicked fairly well But the money thing just got in the way Because when you know you can't give her the lifestyle That she's accustomed to It's like you know I mean I'm not poor but I don't have enough money to buy a three story house On the edge of the cliff And there definitely needs to be something deeper A deeper connection Well I mean I think for me It's like one of those things where you You want that balance I mean she could probably File or whatever she wants Or have all the things but maybe you fulfilled What she didn't have Right but there's also the fact of Working for it like There's always something more important like Hey wait a minute I can afford you know I saved up to buy it it was more special Instead of just instant gratification Having it and it wasn't as powerful Right so The real question is how was the sex Yeah I'm gonna respect her And not say anything about that Oh what a gentleman look at that See there are gentlemen out there I appreciate that Wow okay you have just blown me away With that answer Can we give this guy a t-shirt or something Take down his info give him a t-shirt There's not too many gentlemen out there anymore Rob hang on the line Sometimes I wish I was still stupid Enough and stayed with her for the money but No you did the right thing You definitely did the right thing and true love Will be coming your way thank you so much For calling in Alright talk to you guys later Bye So that's cool you know what One of the tips I Definitely saw when I was researching this topic Is If you have money Or even if you don't have money don't use Gifts as a substitution for Showing your love because Something you know if When I was with my husband and we had No money at all One of the gifts I gave him One time was a jar full of notes And memories And it's like that I think is more meaningful than any I don't know $300 leather jacket However I did give somebody that once too And that was also meaningful Well I mean I think you know gifts in general I think there's meaning you know what I mean Some have more meanings More meaning than others It just kind of depends We're definitely going to get into that more Next week as Valentine's Day Comes up but let's go to a quick break And we have so much more To talk about afterwards We'll be back soon We'll be right back Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day Next week as Valentine's Day because I'm so worried about what I look like. I'm just like, I don't want my hair to be a mess. Okay, you're a self-centered whore. You're not a lazy whore anymore. Oh, thank you. I'm going to take that as an upgrade. I'll take anything over lazy whore. Oh, jeez. You're still a whore. I don't care what you say. Whatever. I don't care about the whore part. It's the adjective. That describes you. I love it. Well, I don't... At that point, do you really care what you look like though? Yes, I absolutely care what I look like. I mean, you have a guy's penis inside of you. And at that point, you're like, oh my gosh, my hair is going to get fucked up. You know what? The only time I didn't care was with my first boyfriend because I actually trusted him. What, to look at you with the lights on? Yeah. Any other guy afterwards? Seriously, I'm totally serious. I could see you with maybe like a shower cap on or like a bag over your head. Like, I don't want to get my face fucked up. Wait. You're like, you have to like not... Don't move and be pretty. I don't want to make ugly faces because that can totally kill the moment. I think at that point, they're worried about you moaning and groaning. Well, no, I totally make the noises. Come on. You know I have the noises. Let me hear. Oh, if I'm fucking a guy? You can moan on cue. And I'm laying completely still like Barbie? Yeah. And I just bust out. Yeah, easy. Just like that? The face. The face is what I'm worried about. Yeah. At that point, what if his like head is like next to yours and you're like moaning in his ear? That's good. I like that. If a guy's on top, I love pulling him down and like scratching his back, right? And just having his face next to mine. Unless he's got a scratchy beard. Then just keep your face a little bit away. But... What if he's like, like, do you like it when he like kisses you, makes out with you? Of course. So at that point, is there more passion and drive behind it? You're okay with that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. His eyes are closed. Have you kissed a guy and his eyes are open, like staring at you while you guys are kissing? Yes. It's bullshit. But your eyes are open then too, if you know that. Because I can feel it on me. I can feel it. So I have to peek. It feels like the eyelashes blinking. Gross. You know, Asian people have like teeny eyelashes. Dude, ours is slanted. You wouldn't even know if his eyes were open or not. How would you know? You're so racist. You're so racist. You're so racist. You're so racist. I'm stating facts. Just because we have like the widescreen panoramic view. Is that what it looks like in there? Oh, yeah. Are you serious? Oh, yeah. Oh, I wanna see. Yeah. Instead of you looking tall, you look whiter. You set yourself up for that one. No, you're calling me fat? No, you asked what our view is. I'm telling you. Oh, you're telling me I'm fat. Are you serious? Is that what you're saying right now? No, I want you to take off more clothes and then I'll tell you. and then I'll tell you. Well, now you're making me feel self-conscious. You don't look like you weigh 140. Oh, are you serious right now? What is wrong with you? No, cause you don't, you look nice. You okay? Oh my God, it's already hot in here and you're just making me melt. Oh my God, I have to go home and work out obsessively now. No, you look good. Why would you just say that to everyone in the whole world? They don't know. So you just admitted to it, that's your problem. This is bullshit and then all of a sudden. Oh my God, whatever. No, I can't say shit, I'm a chubby dude. How do you even know that? Cause I've lifted you up before. Oh, okay. And I'm, you know. Just by gaging. Well, I was off with your breast measurements. I said 36, you said 34. Austin, no. I think I have to let Alex sit alone on that. Alex. Melissa. Look at me. I'm the guy you're gonna marry in March. I don't even wanna look at you. I don't know if we can go through with this right now. Yeah, we can. Trust me. You're gonna be such a domineering husband. You like it. I'll put you in your place. You're gonna be. See, you like it already. You can't stop laughing. I've been there before. I don't wanna go back to that. Don't worry. I demand separate bedrooms. Okay. I snore anyways. I probably, it's like my mating call. Ew, in your sleep? Do you snore when you're awake? What do you mean? You mate in your sleep? No, I said it's like a mating call when I snore. Have you ever had that? Have you ever had someone bang you while you were asleep? Bang me? Mm-hmm. Like, bang me? Like, bang me? Like, have sex? Yeah, like fuck you while you were asleep. Have you ever woken up to somebody fucking you? Yeah, I've, well, getting head at that point, I pretended to be asleep, but I woke up and then. What? Was it like a role-playing thing or? No, I was asleep and then she wanted it. And the next thing you know, like I'm getting head and then I pretended to be asleep. So that she would keep going? Oh yeah, she got on top of me and I'm like, what are you? Okay. And said like, no, no, no, stop. Yeah. At that point, you know. You just went with it. I wanted to nut right away to go back to sleep. I tried so hard to come so fast. I'm like, fuck you woke me up for this shit. That's the best sleeper. This is what you're gonna get. Oh, but she was on top. I thought you liked that. I like it on top, yeah. When she's on top? Yeah. Why do guys like that so much? Because we're lazy guys. Ah. There can't be two lazy people in a relationship. That's true. But what if I make you a sandwich afterwards? What if you know like the best grilled cheese ever is coming, then is that cool with you being on top? I thought guys like to pound it in and feel all powerful. Yeah, but I think there's a time and place. You know what I mean? Like every time and every place. I don't know. I think change it up. I mean, honestly, you're okay with just taking it all the time, being on the bottom? Yeah, I kind of like that. You don't like want to change it up at all? I mean, no. Okay, so now you're boring. Self-centered whore. I'm telling you, I really need to not have sex for like a while because I was so creative with my ex-boyfriend that it just really took it all out of me. Like I loved being with him because he was always pushing my creativity and I really just don't have the energy to start over right now. But though, you know what though, you make it up by giving a great head. Thank you. You give the best. I guess I'll take that after you called out my fatness. Whatever, you don't even weigh that much, I was just fucking with you. I do. Oh, shit. I can't lie, I'm sorry, I don't have like the lying bone or whatever, I do... The lying bone, can I also Google that, is there a lying bones? There's a funny bone. So, there's gotta be a lying one if there's a funny one, right, or is that a joke? That makes sense. Your funny bones are being funny. I can't wait to see, I cannot wait, I can't wait, I can't wait, I can't wait, I cannot wait to see the picture Austin comes up with for lying bone. It's easy. It's you lying down. I thought that was the lazy bone. Now go. Is this thing on? We're so off track right now. Oh, my God. No, it's just shenanigans. Listen. You listen. All you people out there listen. Call in. 800-893-9562. Somebody call in with an Asian accent. Please. Somebody save me. I'm like Melissa's going to kill me on the way home. This is Oral Stimulation on XM165 in collaboration with Skid Row Studios.com. If you want a sweet discount on AdamandEve.com, just type in promo code Skid Row and buy yourself something amazing. Well, actually Valentine's is coming up. And your relationships has. And your boyfriend's got you like a gift. No. Or like a sex toy, I should say. No. I don't have a date for Chinese New Year's. I don't have a date for Valentine's Day. That's a holiday that you celebrate. I'm so confused with you. You know how much I love fireworks. Oh, yeah. Now I know. I'm going to get you fireworks for Valentine's Day. I guess that'll make up for missing New Year's. I'm going to get all the ones they didn't sell or like and give them to you. Yeah, dude. That's a great holiday. Everything's red. That's like my favorite color. I didn't know that. So red's your favorite color? Yeah. Okay, cool. And there's money all over the place. Okay. Always a good thing. And they have those awesome dragons. Like dragons? You know, those dancing dragon things. Okay, I got you. No fortune cookies though, unfortunately. Those are rare at Chinese New Year's celebrations. Yeah, it's usually like the red envelopes and the money. And those little coins with holes in them. Okay. Those are awesome. Gosh, you know more about the Asian culture than I do. I'm so impressed. What's your favorite Asian food? Oh, do you even really? Do you really want to get into it? Yeah. I don't know. You know me, I'm an eater. I love Taiwanese food. Really? Yeah. Give me what's a sample dish I don't eat. Chinese donuts? No. What's a sample food of a Taiwanese? Like explain the dish. Okay. Well, there's so many of them. There's this restaurant over by me called A&J. Uh-huh. And it's like all authentic Taiwanese food. Okay. And I think it's run by like all these sisters or something. I don't know. But they always know my order when I go in there because they're like, oh, yeah, you, you ordered this, this and that. And I can go in once every three or four months. Okay. So what name a dish or like what's in it? What's it made out of? I don't know because, oh, well, here's the thing. The whole menu is in Chinese characters. And then, but they have like the order form. But the numbers don't align with the order form numbers. So you have to kind of go back and forth. You have to like line them up like, okay, box. And then this is a box on the order form. And then mountain. I don't know. Just a bunch of stuff. It's good though. Okay, cool. Taiwanese food with boxes and characters. Yeah. Sign me up, please. You could be eating like, like scorpions or something. No. I'm not a vegetarian. They know. See, that's all you have to say. What kind of food it was. Are Taiwanese, are they, are they vegetarian? No. So how do you know what you're eating? It's like tofu stuff. Like a lot of veggies, obviously. Yeah. There's like a lot of mushrooms going on. Okay, cool. I don't know. Get your veggies. Are you okay? Austin's dying over there. Anyway. Okay. If I was a hot woman and you were a less attractive man, would you take me out for Taiwanese food? Absolutely. What if I was a less attractive woman? I would take you to McDonald's. Well, maybe you like hamburgers. Maybe I don't. Even if I was ugly, I'm still a vegetarian. Oh, well, we'll get like a salad. The salads have chicken in them. You could get them without the chicken. Chicken on the side. No. They just pick the chicken off and then there's still bits of chicken in there. I know that. Oh, you sound angry at McDonald's. Fine. We'll go eat the Taiwanese food, please. What else you got? I don't even know. I know. We're getting married in March. Oh, we are. I'm going to have to rethink this. I mean, you're calling me fat. No. And lazy. I didn't call you fat. I never once called you fat. You implied fat. Because of my vision? No. Because of what? I don't know. I never called you fat. Listen. Your interpretation is completely off. Speaking of implications, there was this study done. On? Women and men and ugliness. And it says women are more open to an uglier man's game than men are open to flirting with uglier women. Okay. I can agree with that. So... Even though I flirt all the time. Yeah, but you're good looking. What? Thank you. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. What are you doing later? We're getting married. We have to pick out our colors. Red. For the new year and whatever. Even though it's going to be St. Patrick's Day. That's perfect. We'll totally stand out. Okay. I like it. I'm going with it. So you're going with the looks thing here. With the men and the women. Like, men are less likely. Yeah. Even if a guy is ugly, he can still have good game and get a hot girl. You know what? I believe that. If a girl is ugly, she's pretty much screwed. She's going to have... You're going to have to go for an even less attractive guy. Yeah. Actually, you know what? Honestly, that sounds about right. I mean, I see it all the time. Not to sound shallow, but I think it's the truth. I really think it happens a lot. So this is going to be weird. You know, this is actually perfect. Because next week, Valentine's Day is coming up. Yep. I'm single for Valentine's Day. SAD, which is the acronym for Single Awareness Day. Yeah. We could talk about great stuff for next week. Oh, we have all kinds of things to talk about. Anyway, this has been Melissa and Alex on Oral Stimulation XM165 in collaboration with Skid Row Studios.com. We want to thank our caller, Rob. Shout out to Rob. Fanboynation.com. Fanboynation. What is that? Like an online magazine? Actually, it's a blog. It writes about a lot of different stuff regarding... Like... Wait. We're running out of time. Interesting stuff. Okay, cool. Follow us on Twitter at Oral Stim. Oh! Why don't you guys... It's just a hit and run. We got a good day. We got a good day.