Say, this is Dr. Skid Row. Hello, this is Dr. Skid Row. That's a good accent. Because I don't want, never did I, was I the one who called? I don't need the nut. Are we rolling? Ringing? Yeah. This is the first time you've ever called? Yeah. Let's see what happens. Hello? Do you think he hung up? He answered and hung up? I don't know. Let's try one more time. I mean, that's the thing is, it's so unpredictable. My stomach sunk. You might see the 800 number and freak out. I don't know. That's true. Like, this could be, like, the biggest moment. Like, God. Like, if it's God. Right, yeah. He never called again after that. Hello? Do you hear a pickup that says, this is Dr. Skid Row? This is Dr. Skid Row. Hello? It's ringing more than it did the last time, isn't it? Seems to be. Hello, this is Dr. Skid Row. Please leave your message for Peyton Hirack. That was the wrong number. Hold on. Who is that? That was a different number. It's a new number. Yes, hello, this is Dr. Yes, hello. Hi, this is John. I really am not looking forward to hearing from anyone. Hello. Yes, how are you? This is Dr. Skid Row. At the tone, please record your message. When you have finished recording... He's nuts. That was the guy. Leaving a nonsensical outgoing message. That was his message. You should leave him a message. His mind's being blown right now. First time he hung up, I bet. Second time he let it go to voicemail. Hello. Hello, this is Dr. Skid Row. Hi, Mom. This is John. I really am not looking forward to hearing from anyone. Some sort of a Chinese message. Bye-bye. At the tone, please record your message. When you have finished recording, you may hang up or press 1 for more options. Hello. Hello, this is Dr. Skid Row. I hear all your messages. What do you want? What do you want? Speak to me. Hello. I hear all your messages. This is Dr. Skid Row. I get 50 messages a day from you. Hello. Hello. Apparate your frequencies. Tune in. Tune in. Tune in. Oh, CD. CD. Oh, I want a sausage. I want a sausage. Lighter. Lighter fluid. Lighter fluid. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. Drumstick. Drumstick. Drumstick. Drumstick. Oh, I like linoleum. I like linoleum. Wallpaper. Wallpaper. Wallpaper. Ashes butt. Spank me. Spank me. Spank me. I've had a bad boy. I've been a bad boy. I've been a bad boy. Oh, hello. It's Dr. Skid Row. I'm hearing you. I'm getting all your messages. I am tuned into you. Bow. Bow. Bow. Buh. Buh. Buh. Ruff. Ruff. Ruff. Ruff. Ruff. Ruff. Oh, man. That guy's going to go nuts. That's even better. He's going to fucking go crazy. Dr. Skid Row, are you prepared to hand over the scoliosis check for the Ruff food complaint? I've noted down, apparently we had medical doctor Stephanie Phillips was definitely the Ursula. She was definitely the Ursula. PUNISHMENT DEMANDS INTENDED PUNISHMENT. WHILE I ENTERED ARKANSAS STATE BANKS, FILED A RESTRAINING ORDER AND CONCLUDED ANY POSSIBLE CONVERSATION FOR THE POLICE OFFICER. I UNDERSTAND THE NUMBERS OF THE POLICE EXISTENCE IN JAIL, AND I UNDERSTAND THE NUMBERS OF about the impact with the Dave Stevens that has changed my life. I understand Dave Stevens has entered Box Hill, has entered Cedarwood Sits. Dave Stevens, have you entered Cedarwood Sits as a police defense fund referee? Well, I just lost another good man in my life. Those in trustful harness, Dave Stevens, definitely trace Dave Stevens. Even Stevens, yes, it is. Yes, Dave Stevens, even Stevens, those in trustful harness. Okay. And then I wanted to give him a chance to listen to your message. Hello, it's Dr. Skidron. It's Dr. Skidron. Okay, psych. Hello, this is Dr. Skidron. I'm good. He answers and then hangs up. I think he's having a mental breakdown because, you know. It's weird. Isn't that some weird shit, though? What's going on in that guy's head? Rip Spreader, what was your favorite part of Dave Stevens' show? My favorite part, when he announced the stripper that came on stage. Oh, wait a second. Was there a stripper on stage? What happened? What kind of show was this? It was actually, right here. It was hosted by the Curioso podcast. Right, right. And the tiki goddess came out and did some boy-lesque. Boy-lesque? And it was fucking phenomenal. I'm sure that's what he's referring to as the stripper. So, tiki goddess had a little extra down there? The tiki goddess was unbelievable. A little bit of God. So, something else was sticking straight up with the tiki goddess? That's right, yeah. The tiki goddess was definitely, had its pineapples there that day. So, Rip Spreader, you... I didn't even know who you were and I walked into the show and there was this giant balloon or something on stage and they were blowing it up and so I was just watching it and then the balloon popped and you came out of it. I thought that was pretty cool. Wow. That's kind of crazy. That's the balloon thing we were talking about. Rip Spreader, you rock, man. I appreciate the support. Yeah, man. Sounds good. Okay, let me know when you're coming back out. How do you put it on your website or something? I will. I'll keep it posted. Make sure you hit me up on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, all that stuff. Good deal. All right, man. Rip Spreader, you're the man. You rock, brother. Yeah, you do. Thanks, Rip Spreader. All right, bye. Later. Bye. Keep spreading them ribs. I don't want to know why you're doing Rip Spreader. I'm trying to picture it. Yeah, well, how did you get that name? He sounded kind of like a Jeffrey Dahmer. He was like, and, um, yeah, I think I'd love to, um... I really enjoyed when you introduced the strutter. Rip Spreader. That's a freaking scary name. Nicole, you could write a story about that. I could totally write a stripper. That could be one of your horror stories. Because, I mean, you know, a tiki stripper with a little bit extra. Yeah. Mark and a totem. A tiki stripper should be called Rip Spreader. Hell, I could put them on the road together. They could be an act. I can open up for them. That sounds awesome. Yeah, there you go. Yeah. Rip Spreader. That's fucking rad. Yeah. I want to be a part of this. I want to be like, hey. But, yeah, I was going to say, you weren't, you, you, you went back east. You performed in Washington. And, uh, and you, so, and you're back. And you're, um, so, uh, now, you, you've got this YouTube show now. Uh, yeah, yeah. It's, um, it's my own, like, web series. And basically what happened was I was shooting tons of shit and people would show, like, send me footage of shows and just crazy clips and all kinds of stuff. So, I compiled all this shit and I was like, what the fuck am I going to do with this? So, instead of, like, putting it on, like, just like a full length DVD, I actually released it as a monthly web series. Right. You know, Living Dangerously. So, we dropped these things and featured, like, all my homies' bands and the music in it and stuff. I mean, it's really, the angles and the veins to it are awesome. There's a lot of different things going on, sponsors and stuff that I've had, you know, throughout the years and stuff. Um, and we actually released it on DVD as the web series with some unedited shit. We got Sword Swallowing, Stunt Gun, Backyard Fire. Nice. So, you do shoot fire. You eat it and... Oh, yeah. Eat it, breathe it, spit it, love it. What was the first time you ate fire? I mean, how do you get... The very, the very first time, believe it or not, like, now, a regular, a regular torch for, like, a fire torch, the head on the torch that you're actually extinguishing in your mouth is pretty big. It's pretty large. It's about, like, maybe about the size of a golf ball if you're doing it right. Okay. So, the first time I do it is a buddy of mine, Christopher Scarborough. He was the host, he's the host of the Curioso podcast. And, um, he's the one that got me in a sideshow and he came to me and he took a, he took a paper clip and unfolded it and wrapped a little tiny piece of a t-shirt around it. It was, like, the size of literally, like, a Q-tip. He lit it on fire. He said to try to eat it. I went to go eat it and I burned my lip and I, like, threw it and I was like, I'm never gonna do fire again. I said, the only way I would ever do fire or learn how to eat fire, and I got a mustache, you know what I mean? Like, I was like, I was like, Sometimes you do, sometimes you don't. Now you got it curled up. Right. And you know what? I was gonna say, if I get a little too crazy doing fire, I end up losing it. I have to shave the whole fucker off and start over. But then I ended up ultimately learning from Chris and this guy named Todd Robbins who's a heavy hitter in the world of sideshow. And I told my buddy Chris, I was like, I only learn to eat fire if Todd Robbins teaches me. So like an asshole, he signed us up for one of his classes and boom, learned how to eat it. And if you look on the backyard fire, you're shooting quite a ways. Yeah, that's a lot of fun. How long has it been now? I've been performing sideshow for about six, maybe seven years, full time, all the fucking time for the past two years. So why the handlebar? And how do you get that? I don't know, right? You should know. You're Italian. I look in the mirror and just fucking flex and that bitch is like, pow, fucking happens. You know what I mean? It's good. It's good. Houdini's my fucking mini-me. Houdini's like, you know what I mean? But it's one of those things too because we get paired up and we do a lot of shows together and now we're like the Stash fucking brigade. I love it. Nice. You guys, you guys, you guys, you guys need to get like little singlets and little weights. I was like, fuck it. Yeah, I was going to say, fuck it. Let's just start. I can do the bass fucking. Oh man. Speaking of people who actually can sing, Joy, now you're going on a European tour. It's very exciting. I am. I am. I'm going to Istanbul next week. Oh wow. Is that Europe? Well actually, we got a lot of Turkey. He did actually. Turkey has half, half of it is in Europe, half of it is in Asia. Right. So, and then I'm going to do, I'm going to go back to Denmark for one day and then go to Canada. Yeah, well he's actually here now. He's in California, but yeah, he's from Denmark and I met somebody, I'm at the ASCAP Music Expo so I left, there was like this huge networking event and I was like, oh bye guys, I got to go. So everybody's there and you know, there's free booze so people are starting to get drunk and I'm like, oh I got to do a radio show. So any famous names you want to drop that you were hanging out with? It's mostly behind the scenes people. Oh okay. You wouldn't know, it's a musician. Oh really? No, I'm just kidding. You would. Sorry about that. She means like the roadies. Yeah, yeah. You look for a... No, but like you know, engineers and producers. There's the guy who discovered Megan Trainor, actually Kevin Kardish. I met him, he retweeted me and because they're doing like panels so there's educational, you know, it's called the I Create Music Expo and so I'm there, it's from day until night and that's the next couple days that's going to consume my life. And are people like recognizing you from the Grammys? Yes, actually. People are like, oh my God, we saw you at the Grammys. That's fucking awesome. Yeah, it was really cool. It was really cool. I mean, people that, you know, like there's an A&R company that I work with sometimes for, you know, I submit things and then they put my music for radio and TV and they said the whole office was talking about it, the Grammys. I was like, ah. No, you broke the internet. People are coming up to me now. I used to come up to the people and be like, hey, you know, find me on Instagram. Now they're coming up to me. It's really, it's really awesome. That's great. Yeah. That's great. And I have a show this Monday. Yep. I know about that. That's right. And I know how I know about that. I will be there. Where is it at? You're invited to it. Oh, really? Nicole booked me. I booked her. That's fucking awesome. Badass woman. Yes. By the way, I can actually say this now. I'm also booking stuff with the whiskey. So if you ever want to play the whiskey. That's nice. Thank you, Nicole. Or if you ever want to play the whiskey, Daniel. Yeah. You let me know you ever want to freak. Freak? You let me know. We should do a show. I would love to have a freak. You let me know. I would love to have a freak. I'm so down. I'm so down. I'm just so crazy because I do like pop rock. Yeah, that's awesome. But I get crazy with the rock and roll. That would be great with some fire. No, no, no. I can see the two of you. That's why I want to pair you guys up because I can tell you guys would totally hit it off. Can we bring fire in the whiskey? I don't know. Fire in the whiskey? We had some stuff for the Mushroomhead show. I would have to get permission. I'm not sure they'd say yes. No, but there's other things that Daners do. You know, old buildings. Actually, that's a good cue. It's Monday. It's Monday. Monday night is the rainbow. Monday night, yeah. You definitely can't bring fire in the rainbow. You can smoke outside on the patio, though. Right. Okay, that's good. Depends what you smoke. You can smoke outside on the patio. You can smoke. Yeah, it's pretty liberal out there. What time does the show start? It starts at nine. But we're doing dinner at eight, so anyone who wants to come out to eat, we're going to do dinner. Now you're telling me. Yeah, we're going to eat. And I usually have dinner there every Monday anyway. Perfect. The girl's going to be there. She's setting it up. We have dinner in a movie. Dan and I invited to dinner as well. Yeah. Everybody, everybody is here. You guys are VIPs. Anyway, we're rolling hard. Yeah, we're playing. Well, before you say you want to have Dangerous D on your show, you might want to see what he has to do. Dangerous D is going to give us some examples of what he does. All right, yeah. I have a few things. It looks like I don't want to crush a whole lot of time, so I'm going to do two bits for you. Okay. And you can kind of check out. Get a small little dose of what's going on. Yeah, you don't want to Yeah, you don't want to do everything. Do you get in trouble if I break shit and fuck shit up in here? Well, probably. Like you'll get in trouble for that whole other day? No, don't break anything. We're in the window shaking our heads. Jenny's like, don't break anything. Try not to break anything. It isn't going to be me held accountable. Well, then I'll just use just a few of the objects I found in here. Right, right. So this first bit that I'm going to do, it's called the human hourglass. Mark, you may want to film. I'm going to film this. Hold on, hold on. Let me get the Wait a second. Get yourself situated. Get situated. Jenny says the camera looks fine. So we're going to do the human hourglass now. All right. This is exciting. So this is what I was talking about where in the world of Sideshow, this is something that I made up on my own. 100%. I actually made this up as a Sideshow stunt and a feat. And I've done it so much and it's gotten so popular that literally up and coming cats that are doing Sideshow do this shit now. Wow. And that's what I was saying is that you can do a lot of shit and do all the heavy hitting stuff in Sideshow, but you got to fucking do something new. You have to do the blockhead. You have to do. Yeah, you got to do all the traditional shit to have respect and know. Right. And it helps you learn, you know, your stage presence and what to do. But if you want to stick around, you want world records and shit like that, you want to get paid for what you do, you got to bring something brand new to the table. And this, you have the world record on this. I do. Wow. Yes, I do. I actually have two different records for this one. Okay. And so the reason why I called the human hourglass, two different reasons here. One is literally I've traveled the world performing Sideshow. Right. I haven't learned too much. Not a whole lot of shit, but I have learned one thing that literally time waits for no man, especially not me, Dangerous D, the human hourglass. Oh my God. Now the reason I called the human hourglass is because I'm going to take this industrial zip tie and constrict it. I'm going to pull it as hard as I can and my waist is going to constrict to the size of a bagel. Whoa. So yeah, dudes. Right. Don't try this at home. Please don't. Don't try it at home. Don't get jealous. And as mentioned before, I don't watch stuff like this. One of my few things I won't watch. You won't watch this? You have to. I told you we're going to embarrass you. Now you have to watch. Dangerous D. Now you have to watch this. Okay. A little closer to the table. Oh my God. I'm excited. Is he good? Is he good? He's good. He's good. Okay. Nicole, you got to watch this. No. I'm okay. Well, then you're just going to have to start clapping for me. Clap for me. Start clapping for me. I'm cheering for you. I'm rooting for you I can't hear you. Nicole, I can't hear you. I'm sure you're awesome. Oh. That sounds terrifying. Oh, you guys see this? Oh. Okay. Oh my God. Look at that. You would be so jealous of this waistline right now. Look at this. He's touching the waist. He's touching the waist. Look at your eyes, Nicole. Look at your eyes. Oh my God. Oh my God. Good job. The human hourglass. That's the human hourglass. There might be blood in my underwear. Oh. That's okay. That's okay. That happens like three times a day. Three times a week. Yes. So that is the human hourglass. And like I said, I wanted to show you that because that is something that I guarantee you you're not going to see that anywhere else in the world. That's the whole reason you come to the sideshow. To see something you won't see anywhere else. Exactly. You won't forget. Speaking of which, let me move over here to my next installment. Okay, do it. Hold on one second. I'm going to work the microphone here. All right. I know we can hear you, but let's close out a little. And I'm going to try to watch this. If I look away, I'm just being pressed. Try it, Nicole. Jen. Jen, yeah. Jen. Jen can vouch too. I didn't rig this. I didn't bring this with me. I actually came here a little early and walked around and found the heaviest fucking portable thing that I can find. Right. Wow. And it was this fucking stepstool. Oh my God. So this is real. And these chains are real. It's the ears that are fake. As you notice, there is a Skid Row Studios sticker on there because that was just literally hanging around the studio. And I was like, hey, he's got his ears. There's a sticker on there. Dark Mark, give me an ATM. Huh? What's that? Oh, no, they're in my lobby. I've actually never done this before so I'm not sure if it will. Oh my God. Do you want to lift it with your hands so people can see how heavy it is? Yeah, this thing is... It's not light. I mean, it's a real stepstool. It has to be sturdy so you can do things with a light there. And it's actually not like a shit one. This isn't like the cheapest one at Depot. This is like the nice one. Oh my God. I'm going to attempt to... The only Skid Row Studios I think it's medium priced. I'm going to attempt a little work. If it does work and I get this thing up, you need to just scream and yell and shit. And by the way, people listening on audio, do you have things dangling from your earlobes? That's what you're going to be picking up. Yeah, these are well-pitched chains hooked to my ears with carabiners that are going to be hooked around this stepstool. Right. So yeah, if it works, scream and fucking yell. If it doesn't, just scream and fucking yell. We'll scream and yell. And the people on audio will never know. I won't scream anyways. Yeah. We got paper towels for the blood. Are you all right? Are you watching this, Nicole? I'm watching. This doesn't creep me out. Maybe it will if he fails. Oh my God. He's lifting it up with his ears. Oh my goodness. He is lifting it up. No. Oh my God. It's almost happening. Oh my God. Oh my God. That is amazing. This guy just lifted a stepstool with his earlobes. That is fucking real. That is real. That's real heavy. I can't hear shit right now. Congratulations. Congratulations. So that's what we call some Pierce weightlifting. I do work out kind of, right? Wow. Not conventionally, but we still get it in. Wow. That's awesome. That is so awesome. Amazing. How do you even train for that? That's crazy. So one thing grossed out Nicole and the other thing grossed out producer Jenny. That's fucking awesome. Yeah. This is almost as bad as when you brought plans. That's what I'm talking about. My ears are ringing. I'll bet they are. That was fun, though. You guys are fun. That's awesome. Good job. This is the type of thing that you do that updates the sideshow because you have the earlobes, the things that are, and you lift things with them. Now, when did you start doing that? It started, it was one of those things where when I got into sideshow, a buddy of mine got me into it because I was able to talk. I didn't do any stunts. He was performing, and his stage presence was garbage. He was sticking shit in his armpit, putting his ass to the crowd, not talking on the microphone. So I was like his fucking Flavor Flav. I just came out, started screaming and yelling, throwing shit all over the place, doing what I needed to do, hyping him up. And then it snowballed. I was like, show me some shit. He's like, well, you got to fucking figure shit out. Learn some shit, bring some shit to the deck. So I literally just tried. I mean, I tried hanging out of the trees with these fucking things. I tried every single thing you can think of. And that's why the web series kind of came in. We're shooting for the second season of that. Because I have literally footage of, like, failed feet attempts. The first time I tried to get a light bulb, I almost fucking died. You know what I mean? Trying to learn how to swallow a sword, shoving hangers down your throat. You know what I mean? So all that shit's been documented. We're getting ready to drop it. So you're going to drop the mistakes? Yes. Oh, that's good. That's going to be awesome. That's going to be super entertaining. I'm going to watch that. Behind the scenes, and just like what you said, like, the one question I get asked all the time, literally everywhere I go, is how did you do this? How did you learn to do this? How did you know you could fucking do that? Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. You don't wake up and think, I could swallow a sword or fucking, you know, banging down to your nose and do all that kind of shit. You know? Right. First, you got to be half fucking nuts. You got to be a little half fucking nuts. You got to be a little crazy. You got to be a little crazy. You got to be a little crazy. You got to be in there somewhere, you know? And literally, it's like. But you're fearless. You know? It's a mind over matter type of thing. It really is. I mean, your energy is like, I can try this. I can do this. There's no fear of failure. That's amazing. Because you know what? If you're not afraid of pain, because that's really what it is. Right. Granted, you do shit where you can literally die. You know what I mean? Right. You can actually lose your life and die. I ruptured my spleen doing the fucking human hourglass when I first started doing it because I didn't know anything about anatomy and I just fucking. Nicole's still like. Yeah. Nicole knows a lot about anatomy. And Joy knows a little about pain because I know you used to. I used to play. You used to do a little whip and chain play. Yeah. So you've been put through some pain. Yeah, that's right. That's right. You can't be afraid of pain. Yeah. Really? I mean, you have to. You know, it's just the same. This energy. You know, it's a certain type of person who really craves. That energy. It's that like adrenaline rush. Right. You know, and I mean, it's not everybody, but it can't always be everybody. There's a sense of control and power. Yeah. It is. He's talking about it. And the way you were discussing the fearlessness of it. Yeah. He knows what he can do. He knows his limits. And he likes to push it just a little bit. That's right. Yeah. And that entertains everybody. That entertains the rest of us. You know, and then it's just like a two way. And it really is. It's like, it's a bad, maybe a bad example, but it's like the car accident thing. Right. Everybody wants to see something. Some shit that like they don't normally see, especially if it's hurting someone else. As fucked up as it is. More than that. It is true. People are twisted and fucked up. They want to see that shit. The fact that you know that you're safe makes the audience feel safe. Right. Right. To experience it with you while feeling comfortable. Unless your head's turned away. She's getting deep in there. She's like a lot of people shit with her. I'm a visual person. By the way, that was the moment of intelligence by Nicole Sturgeon trying to have one on every show. But Joy, you just had a big Indeed GoGo campaign that was a triumph. Yeah, that's right. And I still don't know what you were raising money for. Well, you donated, didn't you? You bought a t-shirt. I donated. But you got a t-shirt. Thank you. I don't even need to know. I'm so involved. I'm so involved. I like the t-shirt design. Thank you. I like having you on my body. So I figured I would get a t-shirt. So I was going to get Nicole one. I didn't know if you wanted one or not. Of course she does. Yeah. Of course she wants one. Of course she wants one. So yeah, so the Indeed GoGo campaign for all the listeners is I did a t-shirt design of me at the Grammy. The snow fans. I'll try to show you a picture real quick. It's a snow fest t-shirt. I know. I know the t-shirt. And freaking people went nuts. And so I did an Indeed GoGo campaign. I said $2,000 to print the t-shirts and ship them out to everybody. Plus give away my music. You know. Yeah, that was. Tell them about the music. Tell them about the song and stuff. Yeah. So I have my songs. And then I have new music coming out as well. Well, that was what it was for, right? Yeah. It was for the new music so I could get a new music video put out. And I have this single dropping called Play. It's actually going to drop at my show. Me and Girl Crush are going to be performing it because we did it. We did a collab. I met her at the Grammys. So we did a collab. She literally filmed her scenes in the video here in LA. And I filmed mine in Denmark. Right. And so we hired an editor to put it together. Awesome. It looks really badass. So that's what the funds went for. And it was also like, you know, people are buying. They're pre-ordering my new music, my t-shirts, everything. So they're getting products in return. And I set the goal like kind of low, just $2,000. And I freaking made $3,000. Well, here's the thing. I got a panic email two days before saying, we're only at $1,800. Yes. And how did you get the $3,000? How did you get $1,200 in one day? I'm telling you, because it was like, if I don't make this, you know, literally there was like pressure from my management. They're like, basically it was like, if you don't make this, and plus I'm not someone who fails, you know, I'm going to do it. I'm not afraid of failing, but I don't accept defeat. I don't accept failing. So I was like, I can't do my first Indiegogo campaign and not make it. So I just sent out emails to everyone. I said, listen, you know, if you're a supporter of mine, if you're a friend of mine, please consider purchasing a t-shirt so we can make our goal. And I'm telling you, the last three hours, is when everybody pulled through. That's how it is. So you donated the rest of the money? By the time I got your email, she had already actually made her goal. No, I was about to. I was like, if it doesn't happen, I'll donate. I'm going to sell all these t-shirts today. Yeah. I was like, I'll make it. I'll make it. No, but I mean, literally people pulled through. Facebook friends, like everybody I know. And the great thing is like everyone in my community. Well, if you ever do that again, like you wouldn't know this because we've already discussed this. But that's what I used to do. So I will help you. Yeah, we're talking $100,000 campaigns. Oh my God, that's awesome. Nicole. Yes. I could use $100,000. Yeah, that's right. You can do it. It's an amazing thing. You know enough people. Because what I did is specifically I do celebrity campaigns. So you have to have. Oh, nice. I'll show you how to do it. Okay. Nicole, we're going to talk about it. We're going to talk. That's exciting. We're going to talk at Doomy's after the show about that. Yeah. We'll do it at Doomy's. You got a book here. Yeah. Please tell us about this. This is something that I thought you would dig. And especially being in the horror genre and stuff. I didn't write it because I can barely fucking read. I can barely read. But this is actually my first. But you can lift a ladder with your ears. Fuck yeah. And I know how to sell these fucking books. But this is actually my first published illustration works. Wow. A buddy of mine named John Lawson, another dude, Dustin LaVallee, had an idea. It's called A Child's Guide to Death. It's an A to Z illustrated guide of horrific ways to die. It's definitely not made for kids. So I'm not going to read it. But I appreciate it. There's like fucking bloody vaginas in here and all kinds of shit. Oh, well, that's my kind of ad. That's what I'm saying. That's horrifying. Good job. You can pick this up like everywhere. Fucking. I love this. You can get it off rawdogscreenpress.com. Wow. But I wanted to bring it. I got a copy for you guys so you can check it out. But like I said, I didn't write any of it. I just drew the whole fucking thing. That's awesome. How long have you been drawing? My whole life. Wow. I actually, I also do like, I do tattoos with my homies and stuff. I did that back home and shit. So I can always tell you. Real artists. Yeah. If you want a little anky danky, let me know. We'll get it done. We'll get it done. But yeah, I haven't done much promotion on this. So I figured it was something that would be like. Right. Let's talk to the camera, Joey. He makes easy as ABC. Definitely ABC. A child's guide to death, but not for children. This is for adults. Definitely. I mean, unless your children are fucked up. Raw dog screaming press. Yeah. But I got a copy. I'll let you guys check it out and let me know what you think. I love this so much. I know. Joey's like totally digging it. It fucking kills at horror conventions, dude. It's so complicated. It's only seven vaginas. I told you. Love it. I told you. Love it. You flip right to the bloody vagina and Nicole's digging it. No. What this makes me think of. This is fucked up. What this makes me think of is on A Thousand Ways to Die. No. Somebody killed. She killed herself masturbating with a carrot and part of the carrot broke off in her vagina and that always haunted me. Oh my God. I saw that episode. Yeah. I saw that. See, at the same time, those two people died in a bouncy castle because helium is poisonous and that one I thought was funny. So you never know what's going to fuck me up. That shit's awesome. Bouncy castle is dangerous. This is a true story. This could kill me. Lactose intolerant. Lactose intolerant, baby. Better stay away from that bloody ass butter. Because that's what'll happen, captain. So anyway, so where's the time go? Geez, I told you. I love this so much. Shit, I was just getting started. I know. You're just getting started. Joy. That's my teacher design, by the way. If people... Oh, yeah. I love it. I love it. I love it. I'll take one at a large. Can I just say, while I'm thinking about this, do not masturbate with carrots. Contact our sponsors. Get 50% off from Adam and Eve. Have safe sex. That's right. Go to our Facebook page, our Twitter page, our Tumblr page. Have safe sex. Get a vibrator set with carrots. You could probably get a custom real sex toy like a carrot. How can you die from that, though? How can you not... That broke off inside of her. But can't you get the carrot out? It broke off in his head. I don't know. I don't understand. You can get the carrot out, can't you? Yeah, he's alive. Joy, if people want to get your t-shirt, which I recommend, it's the Snow Fence. It's a Snow Fence t-shirt, and it's organic cotton, and we have children's sizes to grown-up, like XXX sizes. Right, right. And you can just go to joyvilla.com. Because the Indiegogo campaign has completed. It's great. Yet, you can still order from it, because we'll be shipping next week. Awesome. Do you want to represent? I was wondering what you were going to ship. That would be awesome. Thank you so much. Joyvilla. And if you can, come to the show, because we also have a surprise lined up involving new stuff. Just give me that one more time. It's Monday. Monday at the Rainbow. The Rainbow Bar is right on Sunset Boulevard. Yeah, it's for eight at eight. I'm in. Monday at eight. Rainbow, Monday at eight. The door is upstairs at 921 Over, because it's in a bar. So, that's right. But you can still come to dinner. All you just can come to dinner. But joyvilla.com. Follow her on Instagram. Yes. Follow her on Twitter. I'm going to follow her everywhere. Yes. That's how you're Instagram. And Jader's D. O. Hey, what shows do you have coming up? Oh, shit. Go to... DarrenMalfi.com. Yeah, four nights a week. Wow. Go to DarrenMalfi.com. D-A-R-I-N-M-A-L-F-I.com. Go to appearances. You can see everything from now until fucking next year. Nice. And you're going to be back at the California Institute of Abnormal Arts next month? Yeah, we're doing that as a regular show there. It's the last Friday of every month, the Beautiful Freaks Variety Show. That's where I saw you, and you were... I didn't see anything. I didn't see any stunts, but you did some hosting. I did, yeah. Well, I guess you missed my set because you were late. No. I was doing my own show at the hot cafe. I was going to be late. You know, we're busy people. But no, I love when I jump out. Usually, I'm walking around in the crowd getting stapled. No, no, no. I got that right. I'm always there right when you're getting stapled. He gets stapled to his body. Oh, my God. With money. Dollar bills to the body. Dollar bills. $10 to the ass, $20 to the face. If anybody's got a hundo, we'll get crazy. Did you provide the money, or did they provide the money? $100 gets a nutsack. That's genius. Hey, if you got the $100, just staple it to me. Fuck yeah. $100 goes to the balls. $20 to the face. That's your own Indiegogo campaign. You don't need an Indiegogo campaign. You raised $1,000. Those are the perks, right? Right. $100 and a t-shirt, you can get a ball sack shot. You want one? Yeah. Let's do it. There we go. Anyway, and Nicole6.com. Yes. All of your writing is on Amazon. And as I've mentioned before, I will have physical copies out now, or out very soon, like literally as I left my apartment today. It's in process. We got one quick caller. Caller? Go ahead. You're on the Dark Mark show. Yeah, I was logging onto Facebook, and I got like 600 people telling me that my brother is on the air right now. Oh. I had to call. And then when I call up, I hear about carrots and vaginas or something. I'm like, well, this must be the show. You're in the right place. Is this your brother, Dan? Is this Rondo? Aw. Yes. It is. What's happening, Kevin? This is my brother. What's going on, man? How you doing? Is this a police officer in Baltimore? We're on different sides of the country, so this is how I call up and make sure he's still alive when he's on the show. I call in and make sure he's still living and breathing. Yeah. I make sure it's not like a prerecorded thing that he's dead somewhere. He thinks I just make this shit up. Hey, Rondo, he lifted a stepladder with his ears. Oh, man. Tonight on the show. Oh, he did it easy tonight. Yeah. That was the only thing impressive we had in the studio. Hey, Rondo, where are you at? Are you in Baltimore or where are you at? I'm in Maryland, yeah. You're in Maryland. Okay. So, yeah, you're staying up late. It's almost midnight there. I am. I know. That's why I was checking his message and everybody's like, oh, your brother's on. I'm like, great. He's always on, like, in the West Coast. Right. Well, catch the replay. The replay of the show will be on this weekend. But do you do any stunts, Rondo? Do I do stunts? Yeah. I support his stunts. He actually, though, you should give it a quick plug, man. You need to go to my brother's website. What does he do? What does he do? No, no, no. No, you don't want him to go to your website? You should. He's too humble. Plug him. Rondo, what do you do? Yeah, Rondo. I do nothing. I was just calling him to give him a hard time. He said he doesn't know. To everyone listening, go to my Facebook page and I'll post it on there. Yeah. Oh, nice. Anyway, so that's, Rondo, we got to end the show, but I appreciate you calling in, buddy. Hey, no problem. Hey, Darren, have a good night, bud. Thanks, man. You rock, homie. All right. Love you, brother. Aw, that's so sweet. It is. It is. The family's calling in. That's like my idol, my older brother. Aw. He's my best friend. So this is your little brother? Okay. That's my older brother, but I also have a little, I have 100 siblings. Okay, you're Italian. Yeah, exactly. That was the older brother, Rondo, and that's my brother. Hey, everybody, have a wonderfully creepy week. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. I'll open that for you. It's a weird idea. But yeah, go ahead. You were saying? I already said it. Oh, okay, great. No, it wasn't fulfilled. A friend of mine introduced me to him. So he brought him up to me and said, you know, he's been looking for a dom. Because he was hush hush too because he's a lawyer. So he was looking for one. So a friend of mine introduced us. And it just went from there. A blind day with a bit of blindfolding. A lot of blindfolding. Oh, good. On his part at least. Wow. So like were you a bully in like grade school and high school and stuff since you're like this dominant? No, actually I was very, to myself. I was one of those kids. A lot of weird thoughts. I was one of those kids in like junior high, high school and stuff like that that I didn't want to be around everybody else. Everyone was just, you got two, you know, the jocks and the cheerleaders which think their shit don't stink. And the jocks think that they can't. They can't get everybody. And then you've got. Not anymore. And then you've got your, you know, your nerd crowd which I absolutely love because I am a major, you know, nerd and geek myself. Number one Star Wars geek all the way. What? But, and then you've got your, you know, your goth kids. And so like I, if I were to fit in anywhere it would probably be between the nerds and the goth kids. I'm looking for Star Wars tattoos. Yeah, that's my thought. You're not looking hard enough. No, no, no. I'm looking all the way. I keep being mesmerized with your breasts and what's going on there. And it's like a horse in a tree. There's one particular tattoo just right in there. Yeah. Right in the middle there. I'm not looking. No. I'm looking. I'm looking. Before you guys got here, I actually tried to get her to take her top off. She wouldn't do it. Yeah. Prude face. Prude hila. Well, you haven't always been this prudish. Now you. I told her. I go, we're going to be on air. And they're going, you know, they're going to be filming it. And she's like. But here's the deal. But they ain't paying me. I go, take your top off. They ain't paying me. I ain't taking no top off. Okay. Hello. Anyway, so next time. I got you some smart water. That wasn't in the contract. No. It was not in the contract. You know, let me tell you something. Even when I did Savage Streets, right? They asked me to do nudity. Right. And I said, no, go. Because as you know, Linda Blair was nude in the film. I know. And yeah, you know. I know. But I said, no. Stella, she don't do the it. Right? Right. So Savage Streets. That's a great segue. Savage Streets. This is why you were in. This is part of the reason. You were in a cult movie, Savage Streets, with an all-star cast. Linda Blair was the star. And little Linnea Quigley. Linnea Quigley, who became a horror queen. And who else was in that movie? There was a lot of. Van Ocher. Johnny Van Ocher. What's his name? Robert Dreyer. Right. Louisa LeShinn. Marsha. Marsha. Marsha. Marsha. I can't think of her name. Right. Right. John Vernon from Animal House was in the movie. That's right. And I cheated. I looked on IMDb. It's cool. But it's a cult movie. And I didn't know what a cult classic it was. But they had a whole panel of all you guys at Monster Blues. And Linda Blair was there. Although she was separate from you guys. She had her own little thing. Yes. And she looked great. Yes. She does look great. And she's really into animals and the whole bit. And funny enough, I just realized or found out a couple of years ago because people, the fans started finding me on Facebook. And I was kind of shocked that the movie had become a cult film. And I'm like. Why are these people trying to get in touch with me after all this time for that old movie? Was that your character voice? No. But you know, I'm a comic. So I like to make it up. Right. Right. I was just trying to figure it out. I've always got voices. Right. Because you played Stella. I played Stella. And I was just this really cute, fun chick. You know what I mean? Right. And oh, but let me tell y'all some dirt, Linda. I hope you're listening. Uh-oh. Vanity. I hope you're listening too. Even the edit. Look at the producer. She sat up straight. She like. Oh. She kind of sat. Vanity. Well, she sat up straight because look who's here. Josie Cat. Josie Cat. It's Josie Cat. See? She's right here. Right next to me. There she is. Although you got your Perrier right there. It's a. Thank you. Thank you. So here's the dirt. She's talking about the movie Savage Streets. Good dirt. Some really good dirt. Okay. Perfect timing. Linda Blair. Not only was I a kid, but I had never done a major feature before. And I was also married. How old were you? I was like 19 years old. Right? You were married at 19? Yeah. To a white man? I got married at 19 too. Yeah. That explains a lot. Don't be talking about my ex as a white man. Don't be talking about him as a white man. He was a man. Okay? And a hell of a man. He was all man. He was all man. Okay? He's from Detroit. No. So here's the thing. How much older was he than you before you get into the dirt? One year older than me. Okay. So that's not bad. No. No. He's a good boy. He's a good boy. Right. But in any event, Linda Blair had a. A trailer. We all had trailers. And one day I walked past the trailer. And I saw her in vanity kind of bent over. And I'm like, oh. Vanity? Like princess? Yeah. Like erotic city prince vanity? Okay. Yeah. Beautiful vanity. And I'm like, oh. I wonder what those girls are doing. I wonder if they're playing. That could be a hot situation. Right? Are they playing? Is there more to the story? And so they turn around and they see me walk by. They go, oh, oh. I figured out where that was going. Right. Right. Do you want to come in? I said. See you. At 19, I would have been there right with them. I was a bad 19-year-old punk rocker with a shaved head. And I was. Please. You wouldn't have been there now. Come on. I don't know. You got a leopard print bra. Well, this is when Linda was dating. Rick James. Rick James. So that's why I was trying to. Oh, why? I was expecting Rick James to come out of the trailer, too. She had the good stuff. Yes. No. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. She was dating. And Vanity was seeing the guy from, you know, the Pop and Lock guy, the Boogaloo guy. I can't think of his name. Shabadoo? Is that the guy? The one that started the whole. From Breaking 2, Electric Boogaloo? Yeah. The one that started the whole Pop and Lock. I can't believe you know that. I love Breaking 2, Electric Boogaloo. Come on. Yeah. I don't even think that's right. Let me see. Let's go to Vanity, who's dating who. But go ahead. Keep with the story. Well, and so it just was all very shocking to me because it was Hollywood and I'd read about Hollywood, but I'd never really participated in the debauchery. Where'd you come from? Detroit. Oh, from Detroit. Small town girl. Yes. And just pretty much. Have you been back there since? To Detroit? Yeah. Girl, have I been back? Oh, and I wish I had so much money to buy it all. I know, but my friend's been house shopping and some of the places like the ceilings are caving in. But the house is $2. And all the fixtures are caving in. The fixtures are like, well, yeah, like 15 grand. Right. They're these old homes and it's amazing the prices. Yeah. I mean, so like old historical places. Yeah, because the house I grew up in is an historical home with a plaque and the whole bit. I guess a lot of artists are moving into some of the areas and they're doing, you know, sustainable living and they're just trading and bartering, which I think is kind of cool. And no, and no put down on Doomy, Doomy, Doomy, the vegetarian place. But I'm all about White Castle. I'm all about White Castle. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. Food's gonna be there. White Castle. White Castle. That's what I like. Oh, so I'm looking at, I'm looking at who's dated who with Vanity. They call them sliders. And apparently I think you're, it's either James DeBarge or Mickey Free that you're thinking of because. Whichever one. Yeah. Because he was into the whole pop lock thing. He started the whole pop lock thing. Because she dated Anna Van, Billy Idol, Rick James. She dated Rick James too. Prince, Mickey Free, James DeBarge, John Stamos, Mickey Six, Anthony Smith. So they have something to talk about. Yeah. Let's give them something to talk about. Right, right. Oh, you have a good voice. Do you sing too? Just Broadway. I can sell a song. Oh, just Broadway. Just Broadway. Yeah, I can sell a song. I can sing. So what's your favorite Broadway song? Um, I don't really have one. Really? No. Can you sing Annie? Um, the sun will come out tomorrow. Who can't sing Annie? Oh, come on. I can't. I can sing it from rock style. You know, like I did a show called, um, I forgot this tour. I did. I did. And one of the songs we sang was, passing through, passing through. You know, like one of those old, like, off-Broadway things or whatever. I don't even remember half that stuff I did. I've done so much. What can I say? You know? So Josie, your band is back, right? Carrera, the show's all back on? Yeah, everything's back on. Okay, so February, if you want to hear somebody sing, February 13th at Loaded. Yes, and we're going to probably do a benefit for Jenna. Sasha, she goes by Sasha Knox. She's an adult film star. She was at Hedrick working this, it's kind of an adult-themed horror, you know, haunted house that's very intense. Was it Hedrick or Hedrick? I don't know. You know me with her. I always get, like, this one was, you know. She was working at a haunted house. It's one of the haunted houses. Anyway, she fell off a ledge or something, and her knee won't stop oozing. It's been like two months. And it's still swollen. It's like, oh, no. It's terrible. So she needs a benefit. So probably, yeah. So Josie has been in a few movies, including, I was trying to pull the clip of Lloyd Kaufman praising you, but you were in Tales from the Crapper, which you've mentioned about a hundred times on the show. Yes. How did you meet Lloyd Kaufman? Because he thinks the world of you. Apparently, you guys have done a lot together. We have. Go ahead. You're on, you know, How to Make a Movie. Like one of his things. Part one and two. I went with him to different production studios, and I basically interviewed, you know, the makeup artists and everyone to the special effects people. And we just basically went through how to make your own movie. It's called How to Make Your Own Damn Movie. He did two parts because he's, like, kind of the king of doing, like, guerrilla-style films. Guerrilla, like Toxic Avenger, Sergeant Kabuki Man. And I learned a lot from him through the years. We've been friends for 25 years. Which was good. Which was good. I was a traumat. Which goes to my original question. How did you meet Lloyd Kaufman? Geez, I don't even remember. I can't remember if it was conventions first or doing the, or working with him. I don't know. I did a lot of appearances with him. So I don't know which came first, the chicken or the egg. Right. If it was the films or the, you know. But it is true that you are the first. Do you want me to open this for you? No, I'm okay. Okay. You were the first black actress ever in Monsterpalooza? That can't be right. What was it, Van Gloria? Well, I'm, well, it was Monsterpalooza. Right. But also, I'm one of just a few black actresses who have done horror films. Oh. Because Savage Streets is also in the horror genre as well as Escape from L. A. Because I was the blonde hooker in Escape from L. A. Which is also a cult film. Did you have the massive afro? No, no, no. I wore a blonde wig. No, she had a blonde wig. Yeah, I started the whole blonde wig trend. Right. That was before RuPaul, before Beyonce. Before Nicki Minaj. Yeah. It was before any of them. And the reason I didn't get killed in the film is because Kurt Russell and I had a little love thing going on. Did you really? We sure did. Yes. We had a lot of chemistry. Was Golden all about this? Yeah, for sure. Really? But it was nothing. Really, Kurt and Golden, you like that? No, no, no, no, no. Our characters had a lot of chemistry. Right. So that's why I didn't get killed. Because I think that had the third come back, you know, that I would have come back as well and that we would have had a love relationship. Because you basically intimated that you had sex with Kurt Russell? No, I did not. No way. Because he loves his little wife and he would never, ever do anything against her. Was she with him a lot of the time? No. When I was there? She wasn't on set? No, no. But there was a little detraction between the two. But only on film. Okay. Only on film. Only on film. Really? He's very professional and so am I. No, no. I'm not saying he's not professional, but he's a good looking guy. Right. Well, I'm a good looking girl. I noticed that. And I was married. And the thing about it is I'm all for monogamy. And if you cheat on me, you got to step play ya. Right. I'm not having it. And I appreciate Kurt Russell's devotion. Step player. I like that. I like his, you know, devotion to his woman. She's good. So how was it like working with John Carpenter? She's getting serious. Oh my God. It was really good working with Carpenter because I didn't realize the enormity of who he was and all that he had done. And the horror genre. He's a legend. Oh man. He is a legend. But he was just so nice. He was just so nice to me. Oh my God. He was so nice to me. The cold old John Carpenter. Yeah. And I was like, God, I can't believe this guy is being so nice to me. Because just, let me just make one other point. I did Outbreak, right? Yeah. I was going to ask that. Okay. Frankenheimer directed that. Yeah. And on set he goes, where's that black woman? Oh, you're the black woman. Chop chop. I was like, is he going to send me to the gas chamber? I just came from Berlin. I saw Hitler's bunkers and it is a car lot now. You told me about that. And a condominium. They didn't want to, they flooded it and they closed it all down because they didn't want neo-Nazis to come and, you know, worship the ground. And pay homage. Yeah. So they decided to make it anonymous. Right. Speaking of that. It is a fucking lot. Speaking of that, Talisa. That's crazy. That's crazy. Has anybody had you dress up in a? The Nazi uniform? Not yet. Not yet? Okay. It'll happen after this show. I think we might have some requests. But you are, you are one of the, I shouldn't say the largest because that's a bad pun, but you are one of the most popular BBW porn stars I would say around. Well, thank you. I started off in 2009 and I worked my butt off. Literally. Only one time. Did you actually lose weight? Were you starting to lose weight from all the action? No. No? No? No. So what do you say? Only one time? You only did one movie or? No. One anal. That's what I meant. Oh. That's really working. That ass was earning it. That was actually my very first time ever doing anal too. And that was my very last time. Oh. You've only had anal sex one time. One time and it was on film. And I've never had anal sex. And I don't think I'm going to have it. It was for the anal sex. But no. I'm doing it to people. It's about pain. You completely missed that. Say that one more time. I love doing it to people. I love doing it to men. I love doing it to women. I love it. But just don't do it to me. Oh yeah. I heard that. I mean if it works for you, that's fine. What kind of instruments do you use when you're doing it to the man? Strap-ons. Oh man. You have strap-ons? All over her face. You have to tie her right here? I mean of course you need a strap-on. My fit is strap-on. Strap-off. I mean you gotta look at it. It's like either you're going to go with a tool or you're going to go with this. What do you want? Most of these are bad. Wait a minute. A Phillips head screwdriver? Of course it does. Did you say a bat? She said a bat. Oh no, no, no, no, no. And someone's ass? Wait, a wooden bat or an aluminum bat? A wooden bat. You know, the Louisville bats are really good. They're nice and smooth. There's a reason they call them the sluggers. I got it. Sorry, so when I was in Germany... Wait, wait, wait. Jessica Nielsen, sorry. Come on. It's better than that. When I was in Germany, I'm all by myself in my room and I'm like, I'm going to look at some porn. First thing that comes up on all the German porn sites are... Scheisse films? Shit films? Yes. And animals. Right. Welcome into Germany. Wunderbar. I actually watched one and I was like, having a debate. I was like... Wait, wait. That's not a debate. The animal? The animal or the scheisse? Who? The animal one. I couldn't watch such a shit one. Okay. And I thought, is that animal abuse? Or is that animal liking? It's BCL. Who's animal abuse? I consider it animal abuse. I mean, I think it's animal abuse. I think if you can't choose it, it's not your choice. Well, but then again, now, if you put peanut butter on something and the animal eats it... Oh! Is that animal abuse? That's animal abuse. Wait a minute. I'm still thinking about that Louisville slugger. Okay, let's go back to baseball. She's like, this whole conversation, let's talk about... Wait a minute. Now, do you normally put a condom over the bat or you just insert the bat? I do normally... What kind of baseball bat? I normally put a condom over it, but if it's their bat and it's staying with them... Then, yeah. Okay, so like... Do you have to use like a lube in order to put that bat up somebody's booty? Yeah, that's kind of terrible if you don't use a lube. Oh, for sure. Okay. It's very impossible. And so... So, Maddie, you put a bat on? Is it like that? My girlfriend's... I was a nurse and told me all these stories of like things that people... Hold on, hold on, hold on. I saw a wall of things that stuck up their butts. Hold on, hold on. I mean, I came up with all these excuses. Hold on, hold on. So, you put a... Oh, I fell on it. We'll get to that in a second. You put a condom on a baseball bat. Yes. You put some lube on and throw it in... And that's what goes. That's how it goes. Okay. And they love it. Yeah, it's really cool because then you have them walk around on all four and it's like walking a dog. You're holding the handle, walking a dog. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! So, that's his tail is the Louisville Slugger bat. Oh, my God. Pretty much. Wow. Wow. Tail or a leash, you know, anything like that. Anything I want it to be. So, these guys never, ever have to worry about getting colonoscopies. I mean, like, they're like wide open. You know what I mean? They're wide open. Because I've got to get a colonoscopy in a couple of weeks and I am like dreading it. So, Lisa, do you want to help her out or... Oh, hell to the no. I can use something smaller. I can use one of those mini bats. Oh, Julie, I was liking it too. I'm scared now. She's like, no, even a Q-tip. So, your friend, the nurse, what's the weirdest thing she pulled out of somebody's ass? She's just said that... What's the weirdest thing she pulled out of your ass? She's never pulled anything out of my ass. I've pulled a few rabbits out of my ass. I'm sure you have. Ha-ha. So, Keen is the comic around here. Go ahead. Oh! Wow. That was a burn. That was a burn. Yeah, no, no. No, not a good way to end things. I know. Wait, wait, wait. Wait till you see what's coming up. Oh, no. By the way, I'm going to tell you something. Before we get to that, Jeremy is here, the president of Skid Row Studios. Oh, hi, Jeremy. Jenny is here. Jeremy, what is your favorite Josie Cat moment on the show? Since this is her last show for a while. It's got to be the spanking the Santa that one year. Spanking Santa? Yeah, we had a Santa Claus in here. This guy totally looked like Santa Claus. And Josie started spanking him. Do it again. Do what you did to Santa. Say it. I said, you've been bad, Santa. You've been bad. And he... He loved it. I said, bend over more. And he did. Sex is a little Santa up in the air. Her hair is looking good. And I got that big thing on my head. And I'm looking at her going, she ain't got that big thing on her head. So I took that big thing off my head because my hair is so cute. It's okay. We don't play a lot of sound effects and wacky things. Yeah, thank God. So I'm like, ooh. For this show. And put this big black thing closer to my lips. Yes. Ooh. Yes. Thank you. And Jenny, what is your favorite Josie Cat moment on the show? Jenny, our producer. Oh, you just thought of something. Come on. You got to say it. What is your favorite Josie Cat moment on the show? I like her liner to say hi to everyone. Hello, dark minions. Say it again. Your liner to say hi to everyone. Oh, I didn't say it. Hello, dark minions. We're trying to find a new one for Nicole. I got to think of something sexy. We got to figure out what we can keep and what we can't. So we've already done the research thing. We're going to keep that one. I do a lot of... And Josie. I'll tell you how much research I do on my female guests. He'll know everything about you. He does a lot of research on the women. Especially women with photos. Yes. And you both have a lot of really cute photos. And so, hello, dark minions. You're leaving with that. Right? We're going to try to find something new. The spank train. I don't know if we're going to keep that. We'll see what happens. We weren't really doing that anymore either. Yeah. So what was your favorite? People were kind of... Yeah. When I started the show in 2000... It wasn't... 2013. It just kind of lost its... Right. It was so funny at first and fun. And then it just... It got old, you know? Well, well... I get into a bit of Penelope's face. All right. I mean, what was, you know, anal batting? Right. When I started the show in 2013, I didn't really... I wasn't... I didn't want to do what everybody else does and just be a comic and reading other comics about comedy and other things. And so... And Josie Cat was my third guest because she's fascinating. She's been an actress, singer, everything that you can produce her. And I was in her video. And we had her on with Gary Garver. And... And... At the old John Lovitz Club. And then after the show, you were like, this is so much fun. Can I come every week? And I didn't... I wouldn't even have thought that you would have the time to do it every week or that you even wanted to do it every week. Oh, I told you. Gary was like, do it, do it. You should be his co-host. You have to thank Gary for that. And I was like, you said, do you have the time? I was like, I don't know. It's kind of like... I can't promise for how long. You know, I did give you a disclaimer. I was like... I'm not sure how long I'll be able to keep it up. Well, you kept it up for a long time. And a lot of great memories and a lot of great shows. A lot of shows. I remember the first show that we did together where you were the co-host. Count Smokula and Wacko the Magician. And they're great. Wacko was one of my favorite guests. Actually, earlier today, I was saying some of my favorite guests, Wacko was one of my favorite people that I've met through the show. Right. And you met Nicole Six through the show. I did. And who else have you met that you've really become friends with? From the show? Um... That's it? Yeah. A lot of people. I mean, there's been a lot of people that I didn't know before. Um... Well, I'll tell you when it really clicked between me and Josie. We were at Deloved Studio, then we were doing it at Emery Emery's house, then we do it here. Was the show that we had Charlie Haynes from the Gorgeous Ladies Wrestling on. And she was the only guest. And, uh... We just clicked. And then three of us just had this great conversation. I was like, wow. It was just buzzing. The week before, we had Danny Danger and we did some tasing. That was fun. I was like... I tased her nipples. I was like... I was like, has anyone ever... This is the one thing... This is the show that I invited you on. This is the one thing that... Why we clicked. Because I'll think of these random things. Like, with Danny, she's done all this tasing with her lips and her tongue. And I'm like, have you ever tased your nipples? And she's like... No. I go, can I tase them? And that was like, okay. He was like... Because, you know, I'll provoke people to get them, you know, to open up a little more than I think they usually would. That's the nice thing about having a female host. Like, tase with a taser. With a taser, yes. That's what we do. You guys are saying some really painful stuff. People are a lot more comfortable, too. You just said, that's awesome. Oh, my God. I'm ready to kill my cat if she scratches me. You know? Well, none of my favorite... One of my favorite sexy cat moments is when Orpheus, who will be here in a couple weeks, set you on fire. That was fun. Yeah. Oh. Orpheus is really good at that. Yes, he really is. Oh. It actually tickled. Yes. It was nice. It feels really good. He uses little fire torches and does little fire play with women. Where on your body did he torch you? Just along the arms. It's kind of like this, but warm. It was kind of like a tickly warm. The stomach, the chest, the... I thought the same thing, but the girl who was supposed to be here wasn't. So I was like, okay. Was it erotic? Did it turn you on? No, not really, because it was on camera. I mean, I don't know. Maybe if I was with, you know... Don't give Ruby any ideas. If you were in a room alone, having fire play, would it turn you on? I was like, I don't know if fire is a good idea. Yeah. So, Talisa, you are, as I said, you're a BBW porn star. You're a BBW sex symbol. Do you mind the term BBW? Because Josie hates when I say that she's a BBW. What do you... Not at all. Actually, when I first walked in here, this beautiful lady right here, she goes, they call you a BBW? Right. Yeah. She was a little aggravated over that. But no. Definitely. Like she was saying with the Girls and Corpses magazine, you know, I am the first, not only full figure. I am the third, but first tattooed woman in Girls and Corpses magazine. And I've been in four issues, including the German one and on German TV for Girls and Corpses magazine. And how did you hook up with them? At Club Hill. I was actually doing a performance there where I was doing, you know, trampling and stomping and I was walking on this guy. At Trample. It was a trample mat. No. Jackie, a trample mat on the show. I've been talking about that. No. But I was actually... He came up to me because... He was literally standing both of my feet on his head while he was laying down. Men love this. Yeah. This guy, Trample Matt, you should hook up with him because he pays. I got all of my fear leaders. We were doing a topless car wash. Which meant when we put that window and people got there, we wouldn't wash the top of their cars. Oh my goodness. So this guy, Trample Matt comes and he has someone who will videotape it. So I'm like, okay, you have to pay each one of the girls $50. So we got on the fence and like 10 of us were just jumping on him like monkeys. And we were all happy. He goes to fetish clubs. He has a sign. Stand on me. It's okay. And so you were trampling his head. Yes. And he loved it. And you know, Corpse, the owner of the magazine... They like to really step on their face. Yeah. It's so creepy. The owner of the magazine came up to me. They have things. The owner of the magazine came up to me and he was just like, I have to have you in my magazine. Right. And I'm like, okay. And describe the magazine for me. We all know what it is, but... Girls and Corpses magazine is where it's supposed to be the girl next door, you know, really homely girls, no tattoos, very innocent looking. Get into positions, sexual positions or anything with corpses. Yes. Movie corpses. Movie corpses. Not real corpses. Oh no. Because that's kind of a real deal, right? No, but I did do an article for Girls and Corpses magazine. I went to Puerto Rico and I did an article on a cemetery out there and there is a picture of me holding a real skull. From the movie. Oh. But for the most part, it's all just photoshoots. Yeah. Oh, wow. Well, the girls. The girls in the pictures with the corpses, all those corpses, of course, are fake. But then they do have a lot of articles where they actually show real corpses. Okay. So let me ask, you know, the basic question. So the people that are looking at that magazine, they get turned on by thinking that a pretty girl is with a dead body? No, I don't think that might be the case. Actually, I think he, this is just my own opinion because he was very proud of the magazine being like the top 10 worst magazines in the world. And he went with that and he ran with that and it was amazing. But I think it was all for fun. It's kind of mixing cheesecake and horror. Yeah. Yeah, that's what it is. And from a male perspective, if a really hot, beautiful woman like Talisa is posing, she's posing and being seductive with a corpse that looks like the Crypt Keeper, I'm thinking, well, she'll lay like that. They're not looking at that. They're looking at the chick. No, no, no. Yeah. If you let me finish my thought, Josie, I think, well, if she's going to lay like that with them, she's going to lay like that with me. That's what I'm thinking. And it's more than that. In my own, I write scary stories. And in my own sex scenes, my job is to arouse you and disturb you and push you to that point that you're almost guilty about it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This one person gave the magazine back to, or said he wasn't going to give the magazine back to my roommate because he had been using it at home and some of the pages might be stuck together. And she told me that because she figured I'd enjoy that, which is, it's fine. I'm glad you enjoyed it. The point is, I want you to feel delightfully disturbed. That's what I thought. Right. So it's not really about turning you on about the concept of the girl with the corpse. It's about turning you on about how wrong it is to picture the girl with the corpse. Okay. Thank you. I think it's kind of like, more like, I don't know. Maybe because I worked with the show too many times. Right. Just can't be silly fun. It's can't be silly fun with a pretty girl. It's girlie fun. It's still a topless girl. It's still being turned on. It's still the fuck with you. That's what it's down to. It has no nudity. Yeah, you're right. They're always invented. The magazine has no nudity. Sexy girls and goofy stuff. It's just goofy. Because he said of who I am and being such a strong, empowering woman, he had me be the only, still to this day, the only corpse wrestler in the magazine. Well, I was going to get into your wrestling. And so you wrestle guys too. Yeah. Femdom wrestling. Yes. Yeah. Are you guys going to wrestle? No. Come on. She's got, she's got, we already talked about it. She's got it. Yeah. We were going to, we were going to wrestle. But when I was, I was on my way to work in New Orleans, my vanilla job. And I, I know I didn't do it at work. I was actually packing in my room and this beautiful, voluptuous, sexy woman was in my room, cupcake narcotic. Oh. And, um. You know cupcake narcotic? That's her name? Yeah. Okay. And, uh, she was, you know, her ass is so amazing that I didn't want to disturb her from bending over in front of me. So I jumped up on one side of my bed and I went to jump off the other side and I slipped and twisted my ankle. Oh, wow. But it was so worth it for that view with that ass. I'm looking at cupcake narcotic now. Yeah, that's a nice ass. Wow. Yeah. She's gorgeous. Now, uh, we got to get her on the show, but I mean, there's, I mean, you know, there's nothing to prevent you from getting, putting Josie. Yeah. She's got a headlock though, right? No. He just wants to see those two amazing chess wrestlers. I have, my neck has been injured for like three days now. I can barely even turn my neck. So how did you get into wrestling? I can't. Um, I actually, uh, was a wrestler for Santino Brothers Wrestling Academy. So you were going to be a professional wrestler? I was. I was. But, um, this was, uh, about four years ago I went to the academy and I was wrestling and it was amazing. It was a great workout. Uh, the first time I was in the academy, I was in the academy and I was wrestling. The first time I was there, they told me, you're not leaving until you throw up. And I'm like, oh, great. They worked me to the point where I went outside and threw up like the exorcist. And they're like, okay, you're done. You're done for the day. But, um. Did they teach you how to trash talk? Because, uh, you're so nice. I can't even think that you would trash talk. You know, what's funny is that, um, I, I am really nice and I'm very, uh, sweet and I'm very humble and, and whenever I do a session with a guy and they want me to degrade them, I have to blindfold them because after I say something very mean and hurtful, I'm like, I laugh. I laugh within myself because I think I don't laugh out loud, but I think it's funny and almost like a little girl. I guess I get that little, you know, little girl like, ha ha ha. I can't believe I just said that. You know, I feel the same way when I'm on stage. Right. I tell a really good joke. Right. Um, but yeah, I've done a lot of wrestling, but then my career, uh, that I'm working with right now in the oil industry, uh, that took off four years ago. So I've been traveling ever since with that job and never went back to the wrestling academy. But with my job, my vanilla job, traveling so much from state to state, I actually, uh, am a premier and I dance. I strip in clubs, in skinny girl clubs. Right. And how does that go over? Um, very good. I make a lot of money. And what kind of man is into BBW? That's, that's making, that's working overtime. It is because I work 12 to 16 hours at the oil refinery. Then I get off and I go to the strip club for, you know, four to six hours. I barely have enough time. To go back to my room, shower and sleep before I have to wake up and go back to work. Oh, but you worked at an oil refinery. I worked at an oil refinery all around the world. Yes. Well, but you made a good point about what kind of men are attracted to BBWs. And the thing about it is that's such a, that's such an archaic term. And it really is not a good term for women because women are curvy. What is wrong with just being a woman? She looks normal. That's what I say. And if you're beautiful and happy and just like it. She would have 10 guys, right? It's not a big issue. Her size is inconsequential. Because really, I think that this whole thing of declaring that women are BBWs now and all that. It's a bunch of crap. You go by the face and the personality. That's what men like. But then you get things on the internet like tattooed plumper to Lisa Brown wraps her flab around a cock. Yeah. Okay, but the thing is BBW doesn't bother me because BBW means big, beautiful woman, big breasted women, big butt women. So I just go by that. I have big tits. So I just go by that. That's right. That's right. That's right. I just go by that. Does tattooed plumper bother you? To be honest with you, the porn industry, the names that they put out there for BBW women and full figured women, curvy women, supersized BBWs, whatever. The names that they put for those movies are kind of degrading. Yeah. Okay. Say I'm a man and I am into a really big woman because I like her stomach. I like her ass. I like her tits. Right. I like her thighs. I'm with you. Yeah. I'm going to want to get a movie that has a good title to it. I'm going to want to get something sexual, something sensual, something that's going to turn me on. Not fat fuckers or something like that. You know, I mean, that's it. And you know, it's not so much as degrading. It's just the fact is that I want I want to find something sexual. I don't want to be like, oh, I don't know if I want to take that into the counter. You bring up a good point because that's why women are turned off by porn, because we're still women and we want some kind of romance. Except for the women to your right. I like funny. I love porn and I don't know about romance. Because I'm polyamorous. I mean, romance. She dates more than one person at a time. Yeah, I date more than one person at a time. And they all know about each other. We either date each other together or I have my own separate relationships. Guys, are you listening to this? How many in your circle right now? Actually, I am 100 percent single. Really? Yeah. It's called a rotation. Nikki's got the rotation. Nicole's got the rotation. You're going to show me your tattoos? I am. Oh, you want to see my tattoos? Okay, trust me. I'm so dark. This should be the dark Ina show. Okay. Let's see. Ina, let's see. We need like a spotlight for my tattoos. Okay, here goes one. Okay. I'll get myself. Wow. Okay. Okay. All right. There's one. Hey, go PJ. PJ is my kitty. Kitty, kitty PJ. Okay. Okay. And then I'll show you my good tattoo. Y'all ready for this? I'm all ready. Uh-huh. All right. Let's all get. Come on. What's happening? Let's go. Get ready for this. Come on. Get the groove. Come on. Come on. BBW. Oh, look at that. Look at that. Hey. Now, who's Brian? What is that? Mooney. Who's that? Mooney is me. Mooney. Okay. Yeah, because when I was a little kid, like they loved me so much. And so I'm the baby of the family out of seven. Right? And so they would call me Booney. Booney. Booney. And so my brother, I hadn't seen him in a really long time because he was locked up because, you know, he's like crazy. Right? And he goes, oh, little Booney. And I go, oh, my God. I forget anybody called me Booney. He goes, yeah. Hey, let me tell you something. I'm the youngest out of seven. Right? From Detroit. Went to Catholic school. Let me tell you. My mother used to complain all the time about my dad being an alcoholic. I swear to God, I thought we were Irish. Well, Booney, I didn't hear what you said. I'm still. That's a great ass. I'm still mesmerized. Why? You got a good view. Not bad, huh? You know what? Why do you think I didn't say anything? I was like. I was looking. I was looking. I was admiring. Squat clean. Squat clean. But you got so many tattoos yourself. When did you get your first tattoo? I was 16 when I got my first tattoo. Right. And you have tattoos. But normally I don't like tattoos on the breast. But you've done it in a tasteful manner. Well, thank you. Yeah. I love your tattoos. See, my trio life has two whole purposes. One purpose is the lotus flower between my breast represents a child innocence purity, which is me when I was born. Right. Long ago. Long ago. Long ago. Long time ago. The willow tree represents your life. Chaotic destruction, beauty, romance, like love, everything. The bathroom, the butterflies represent the good and evil in my life that I've done to myself. But if you. But if I didn't have this top on and if you went like this, no woman's boobs are even. So the lotus flower evens my boobs. Oh. Well, actually, actually, Josie's are even, but that's that's the doctor's handling. The doctor did a good job. Best. Best. Best money I ever invested. Well, you know me. It's all about chitlins and pork. No, no. Yours are fine. Yours are fantastic. The thing with Josie is she has this jacket on. Yes. I know. And yes, she's been on the show a lot, but I've been traveling the world this whole time. I have not seen her boobs. So I am being deprived right now. I want to see your boobs. I'm just in a sports bride. It's her awesome. Oh, Josie, show me your belly tattoo. Yeah, she does have a nice belly. She has a lotus too. Do we all have lotuses? Do you have a lotus? Do I have a lotus? I showed y'all my tattoo. Okay, what's your lotus? That's my lotus. What's the big deal with the lotus, everybody? Everybody says, oh, look at that. Hello. Nice. Oh, look at that. Very nice. And you have, is that your only tattoo, Nicole? No, I have, I have a narcissist. I go big. And then I'm actually getting a posy here right before Valentine's Day. I'm thinking next Tuesday or Thursday. Get a Friday the 13th tattoo. So what's the big deal about the lotus? I will be around you on Friday the 13th. The lotus flower, what's the big deal about that? Tell us about the lotus. I think it means a lot. Tell us about the lotus. Tell us about the lotus. Tell us about the lotus flower, everybody. Well, to me, the lotus flower represents innocence, purity, serenity, you know, tranquility, everything that is good about a person. So that's what a lotus flower represents to me. Right. And what do you use it for? I got mine when I started to break out on the scene. It represents Queen being regal, Cleopatra. What scene did you break out on? The entertainment scene. Okay. Multiple facets of it. So it means different things to different people. Yeah. So basically. Well, shit. I need to get me a little lotus. We're all going to the tattoo parlor. We're all getting lotuses. And where does the time go? I do have to say, it goes by so fast. So fast. So fast. I have to say, Talisa Brown, now you're back in town. I am back in town. I am going to be leaving, though, for work. But I did move back to Southern California. Yay! Do you have any dancing things coming up? I am going to be dancing probably if I'm still here next week at. The Vintage Strip Club in the Valley. Okay. I do that every Thursday night. I drove by there the other day and I thought this would be a great place to have a party. It is. And they are amazing. I've never been in there. They are amazing there. The name and the outside looks vintage-y. I'm like, I can't believe this is the one strip bar in LA I haven't been to. But it's amazing. It's so far. It's a good strip bar. Well, next Thursday you're not going to be on the show. So please, go and see Talisa and Strip. Bring the whole gang. And you're Mistress Talisa on Twitter. Yes. Mistress Talisa. Yes. Mistress Talisa on Twitter. Talisa Brown on Facebook. FetLife NYC Talisa Brown. NYC Turtle Talisa Brown. Yeah. My NYC family, the leather family. I've been with them for about a year and a half now. Oh, okay. So I have a great fetish community. I love my family. I absolutely love them. We've got to get into that next time you're on the show. Please come back. I'll see you soon. Yes. Definitely will. And it's Ina or Ina? Ina. Ina. That's what I thought. I think I said. I said Ina a couple times too. But Ina, I'm so sorry. First off, you were fantastic. I knew you would be. Where are you? Do you have any shows coming up? You're a terrific stand-up comedian. We didn't even touch on that. I know. I know. Which is good. And we didn't even touch on the fact that my little cute commercial, that Got Milk commercial. That's right. You're on the Got Milk commercial. Hello. That Got Milk commercial came in. Okay. Spike TV did their 20th annual funniest commercials of the year countdown. Out of all that were submitted, thousands, we came in number five. That's amazing. That's amazing. It's a great commercial. YouTube and you've got milk. It's very funny. But I have a show on Saturday at a recovery house for women. Okay. That's going to be good. Like 300 or 400 people. I'm going to rock the house. Right. And then Tuesday, I'm at, where's that place I'm at? With Lang Parker and Laura Hayden, everybody. Oh, I've forgotten the name of that place. 402 Comedy or something like that. I've forgotten. We need to pledge that. What's your Twitter so we could go there? Yeah, I'm at Ina Romeo. Follow her. And then I'm on Twitter. Follow her. Follow her. Follow her. And also InaRomeoTV.com. Okay. Right. I'm trying to see. There's nothing on your Facebook page. And how do you spell it? Yeah, it is. If you look down, you can see it. Okay. Hold on. The 402 Comedy. 402. Hold on. I'm scrolling down as fast as I can. Yeah. Because you got, okay. Because it's all the posts that I make. Yeah. I'm good like that. Yeah. But, so I-N-A Romeo. Okay. It's the West of the 405 Comedy. Yeah. At 116 Santa Monica Boulevard, Santa Monica, California, 90401. David's Four Sif, my Brian Mark, Kristen McHugh. This is a good lineup. Lori Hayden. So, definitely check that out. Tuesday. At 8 o'clock. Yeah, Tuesday. If I am still in town, I will be there. Oh, I would love it if you guys would come out. Oh, you too, my darling. Josie gets to make more friends at the end of her show. Exactly. And Josie, it's only a minute left, but I got to tell you, and you will be back as a guest many a time. And I just, I want to thank you for everything that you've done. Well, thank you for having me. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You've really made the show completely different and a lot better than I initially thought it would be. And, you know. I was telling Mark you were his cat woman, because I'm the new Robin, but you were the cat woman. Right. Apparently, I'm Batman, so. It's your show. But tell Nicole your reaction when I said that I was going to ask her to be my new co-host. Oh, so you were one of the people that I was going to suggest. Yeah. Thank you. Because I always thought you were a great guest. Thank you. So. So, you're leaving the show in good hands. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. Good hands and little tits. Right? They're not as little as you think. No. Oh, that's right. They're being hidden. They're quite nice. They're solid. They're solid. Everybody. Little tit girls. Everybody. I love her tits. I have a little tits too. It's Josie's final show. So, I love her tits. Bye to Josie. And then. Anyway, congratulations. Nestor's sister won a SAG award for being on the cast of Orange is the Black. Hey, who's that guy? One of my favorite shows. And also, if you're in Las Vegas this week, February 2nd, I will be at the Adrenaline Barn Grill 3103 North Rancho Drive with the 420 comic Jeffrey Peterson, our friend. Bobby Stouts is a great lineup. Everybody have a wonderfully creepy week. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bloody victim that's about to sit next to me. Just gruesome, disgusting corpse. You would not believe what happened to me in the bathroom. One of those ones, huh? This is a big reveal. There she is. Hi. As you've never seen her before. Disgusting, ugly, and gruesome. Maybe you have seen her like that before. She does look beautiful. You're a beautiful corpse. Nicole Six. Dad is gorgeous. I think a lot would. I think a lot of you would. I know a lot. Maybe Missy Munster can do a whole makeover on you. By the way, that is courtesy of our guests. I'm going to do this backwards because I usually do it this way. She's been briefly on the show and I forgot to bring my mic stand that she did. You better know her now because in a very short while she's going to be too big for all of us. Superstar in the making. FX artist. Makeup artist. She makes people beautiful and ugly. Either one, whatever you want. Or beautifully ugly. Beautifully ugly. Like we have here, Missy Munster. Hi. Hi, Missy. Thank you. Who just got on, is going to premiere. She's going to be on the new season of Face Off on Sci-Fi Channel. So you'll be seeing her all sorts of places. She'll be making up people and doing all sorts of Hollywood jobs. And next to you is somebody who, gruesome in his own way, but he's, this guy, he's, we've referenced him on the show before. I'm glad to have him on now because I am so envious of this man. This man gets to go to bed with Courtney Cruz every night. Living the dream. Living the dream. Well, I do in my mind, but I don't in actuality. But he also is the lead singer of Psycho Charger, the Jimmy Psycho Experiment. What other bands are you in? Oh, what day of the week is it? You know, it's something wacky. There he is. You can see it in his eyes. It's Jimmy Psycho. Thank you. Thank you. And we have somebody we haven't seen in a while. And actually, there's a whole new audience to the show. So. There's a whole audience that doesn't, has no idea who you are because they think Nicole Six, they think the show's starting in February. But it's our old co-host. Old? Hey, who are you calling old? Our former co-host. And she's got a lot going on. She's been very busy since, since she left the show. And she's got a lot of stuff going on. Josie Katz. Woo. Hello, Dark Minions. Oh, it's been a while since I've heard that. Anyway, let me do the sponsors really, really quick here because we actually have sponsors now, Josie. We had sponsors before. Yeah. We have even more sponsors now. I was in on the Doomies. You were in on the Doomies. That's right. Doomies Home Cooking was a sponsor when you were here. We had the T-shirt company. Yes. Audiobooks. Audible. Stamps. Oh, okay. Stamps is no longer a. No longer. Yeah, but. Oops. Ooh. Okay. Go to stamps.com. They're fine. They sponsored us for a while. They gave us a chance. Who else? Adam and Eve is sponsoring us now. But formerly, formerly. Sexy. Hillary's Vanity used to sponsor us. Yes. That was fun. And Baylor and Pack used to sponsor us. That was the first one. Baylor and Pack was our first sponsor. Yep. That's where you got all your black lipstick. Right. Exactly. I'm not wearing any makeup today because I figured in front of a makeup artist such as Missy Munster, it'd be embarrassing. But you ever been to Doomies Home Cooking, Missy? I have. I love that place. It's fun. Yeah. It's the most delicious vegan food you've ever had. We were there three weeks ago after the show. We go after the show from time to time. And you had the Big Mac that's on the secret menu. I did have the Big Mac. And I got to say, that Alfredo right there, that's like some shrimp Alfredo with garlic bread. It was. Let's click on that. I want to eat that. That is absolutely. I like the chicken and mashed potatoes. I had the fried chicken myself. I had the fried chicken myself. With the fake bone in it? Yeah. The wood. Piece of wood in there. It was delicious. It's so good. My favorite thing is the creme brulee though. It's the best. Creme brulee is delicious. Are you familiar with this place, Jimmy? I have. I'm more of a carnivore. But I was a vegetarian for 10 years. But whether you're a vegetarian or a carnivore, it's delicious stuff. I'm going. I'm going. I'm down. Let's go. They have Philly cheesesteaks. They have pulled. Pork sandwiches. Ridiculous. Wow. It's all vegan? All vegan. They cook the vegetable protein in a way that makes it taste like meat. Right. Because the whole story is Phil Doomey, his girlfriend, he kept dating a lot of vegetarians, vegans, and they would take him to these, you know, with the horrible vegan restaurants where it's all beansprouts and crap like that. He's like, I want to get a vegan restaurant. I want to get a vegan restaurant where I can get stuff that I can eat. So if you're in LA, we have a worldwide. If you're in LA, you can get a vegan restaurant. If you're in LA, or you're in LA, or just go to 1259 Vine Street, Los Angeles, California. Doomey's Home Cooking. They're on Facebook. Follow them on Facebook. There's something here about Haunted Hayride. I don't know what's going on, but Doomey's now delivers. Whoa. Oh, see, Nicole. Nicole's right in the neighborhood, too. I don't know. It's a two-mile radius. Might be just out of range. You'll never have to leave your house again. But you're with the Dark Mart chefs. If you're in Hollywood, they do deliver them. And two-mile. Two-mile radius. So if somebody in Buffalo or New York can't wait for that, they can make the vegan fair go to Doomey's Home Cooking. They're great. Yum. Actually, our new sponsor that we've acquired since Josie was here is adamandeve.com. Oh, yes. The number one adult toy store on the net. We're all familiar with that. Oh, yeah. So did they bring samples? They did not bring samples, but I did post two on our Facebook page, which you can go to darkmartshow.com and go to the. Facebook page. Let freedom ring. That's a different sort of ring. Facebook.com slash darkmartshow. There's two things I posted today. First off, you can get 15% off the SI Select 8x1 massager. It's a guaranteed orgasm in your hands. There's a link on our page. I haven't had an orgasm in my hands. I haven't. Really? I have. Yes. How's the orgasm? I've been single for a long time. So maybe a wild massager is something. Have you worn yours out? A few. Well, and then also we have. I also posted that this is the best deal we've ever had for adamand.com. I'm sorry, adamale.com. Excuse me. I messed it up a few times. Adamale.com, the number one gay adult toy store on the net. Also a sponsor. 50% off. And almost anything with and also a free gift. If you go get hot 15 and click on the link that we put on our show. And also audible.com. You're mentioning that audible.com is a sponsor. Audible.com. I'm putting in. I'm putting in Missy. Let's see what they have. And actually something from Duck Dynasty comes up, which is really, really good. Good call. Reflections of Faith, Family and Fowl by Jace Robertson. That's Fowl with a W. And Missy Robertson. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And we get to the good stuff. We get to branded sinners book one. We get to sexy erotic stories. Stories. Lesbian slut strippers in the preacher's wife. And the preacher's wife. Yes. Good pay. Good benefits. And great sex. All in one. Yeah. These are all different. These are all different books. Like, holy fuck. Same with the preacher's wife. On the app. Book seven by Missy Allen. Is preacher's wife. Is that a thing? Is that a fetish? Apparently so. I see that you are so sex-starved, madam. I. could fulfill your wildest fantasies. Now, if we put in Psycho, we get American Psycho by Brett Easton Ellis, of course, narrated by Pablo Schreiber, who plays Pornstache on Orange is the New Black, 15 hours and 18 minutes of it. Pornstache, I love that guy. 15 hours and 18 minutes of Pornstache reading American Psycho. You can get that free. Just go to darkmarkshow.com, click on the Audible button, you get a free book, whatever you want, and a free 30-day trial at audible.com. You can get the original Psycho by Robert Block and also the Babe, My Bumlin Psycho and the Babe, My Bumlin Psycho. And of course, if you put in Cats, you get one of my favorite books, and I actually have this in my queue. And where is that? Picking up an extra cock for Cat. I know it's in here somewhere. I always need that. And then if you put in Six, this is odd. And I have to, I did look this up today. You put in Six, this is going to hurt photography and life through the distorted lens of Nikki Six, which is interesting because that's a photo book and you have the audio book. And he narrated it. So maybe you have to have the pictures with it and then he like tells you about the pictures. Or flip through his Instagram. Wait, here's the thing. Let me narrate my Instagram. I don't know. It's a sample and he's just... That's all pictures of his dog. Anyway, just go to darkmarkshow.com, go to darkmarkshow.com, click on the Audible button, and also go to NicoleSix.com, pick up her actual book, Some Fucked Up Shit. Yes. It's a... Sounds like my day. It'll tingle your spine. I'm doing a show at the... And other places. I'm doing a show at the CIA on July 31st and I'm doing a couple shows in Vegas in August. But enough about me. Chelsea Cat is back. And the last we left off with you, you were finishing up the video for Pissant Road. Yes. You were the lead singer of Pissant. Yes, for 20 years. For 20 years. But you're the only member that's been in the band the whole 20 years. Is that right? No, Dave and I started the band together. He's in Skin Mouth. He's in the mask right now. You don't have your headphones on, so you don't know what you're playing. I don't know what you're playing. Super Chick or Something Stupid? Oh, Sex Junkie. Yes. Give me some more. This was your first semi-hit. This was my first song I wrote for the band. Right. Actually, it was about my boyfriend not giving it up to me one night. Right, right. He said, where are you, Sex Junkie? We can all relate to that. Sadly. Yes. Yes. Yeah, come on, baby. Don't put up a fight. And he needs some new boyfriends. But Pissant started now. You had been a teenage actress. You've been on a sitcom, a show with Ed Asner. You've been in movies. And then you started doing music. I started as a gore-gore dancer for the gore band Hana Garage. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was 18 years old. And with a fake ID, I was going all around Hollywood to all the 21 and over clubs. And... You don't need to do that anymore. It's like 21 or 18 years in now. I don't need to now. Right? Let's see. I just need to go to a bunch of clubs. Because usually I sneak around. Yeah. We've been doing that for what? Like five years now? Six years? Yikes. It's been a while. Since you were 14. Because you're 20 now. Yeah. So... You've been sticking here since you were 15. 16. 16, okay. We met when you were, what, 17? 16. Well, you met her at the same time because you were in the video. Yes, but I, you know, you introduced me to her, so yeah. And we're going to get to that. And that is when I met her. And she made everybody look pretty. I didn't get any makeup for some reason. They didn't put any makeup on me. But I was in one of your videos. That's because you look pretty enough. But I was in a video so close. So anyway, just to make a long story short, like, Pissant had, you, did the punk community, did you get any backlash? Yes. Because you're a fetish model? No, because, first of all, in the mid-90s, there wasn't a lot of female singers in punk bands. There were only a few. There were Exine, Debra Harry, and a handful of others. L7, Courtney Love. Yeah, we all kind of came out around the same time, except I didn't get famous. The leader. The leader. And playing a lot of the same clubs. But, yeah. So how did you get on Porn to Rock? Because you were on VH1 Porn to Rock. Because the band was a regular band on the Playboy channel, which is considered adult. How did you get on the Playboy channel? I went to them and pitched an idea for the Judge Judy show and took Apollo Starr with me. And he played our sleazy agent, and I was suing him. Not the Judge Judy show. Yeah. Or, I mean, Judge Julie. The Julie show. Julie Strain. Okay. Oh, that Judge Julie. Okay. Julie Strain from Heavy Metal Magazines and the horror movie Actress. It's been a while since I jerked off to it. I'm time-made. I mean, watched it. So then you got to Porn to Rock. And it's just kind of, I found a way to get my band on all different types of shows. We were a gay band on queer television. We were on E! Channel. We did Chelsea Handler's show. I played a prank on my drummer. Right. We did a show called Friends or Lovers on CBS, where I had to pick between my boyfriend and my band, and my band fired me on TV. Right. So I found a way, basically, to incorporate the band into any type of TV situation I could possibly think of. And you just directed a video two years in the making. I started it two years ago, and then I got busy and didn't finish it. You had another band and another band. And a podcast I was working on. Oh, that's right. The Dark Mark Show. Yes, you were going to do it. You're going to work on your video every Thursday night. Yeah, so anyway, we're going to show the video, but is this the first video that you've actually directed yourself? Because I know you're always producing, you're always involved in it, but... No, I've always given direction, but I don't give myself director credit. Because, you know, I look stupid, a producer, singer, writer, director, like on the whole thing. And also, I'd like to give credit where credit's due. You know, there are people who help out. The more people that help, the better. So this one, you said, fuck it. I'm taking the credit. Yeah. Okay. Well, let's see what that turns out. This is the new piss-and video for Road. That you guys can't see. Yeah, we'll hear it. It's gone. It's gone. From here in town, gotta get out of this ghost town. Kickin' the rocks, down the road. It's a long journey, so I've been told. I know what's wrong, I know what's wrong. Meet me again. I know what's wrong, I know what's wrong. Don't ask questions, just give me what you don't. Meet me again. I'm just a little hungry. Wearing a crown, on the verge of a nervous breakdown. So yeah, we'll meet again. So Jimmy, I know through your burlesque performer wife, Courtney Cruz, who does Stargirls, but how long have you been, you primarily sing Psychobilly? Yeah, it's kind of like an industrial Psychobilly surf rock, horror rock. You don't have to kiss my ass because I'm wearing KMFD, I'm sure. You can do whatever you want. Oh, yeah. Oh, it's like industrial, yeah. It is, it's true. I'm kidding, I've heard your music, I'm just kidding. But what's, because I asked Gary. Gator, our friend from Coffin Dragons when he was here, when we had a Rockabilly night. What's the difference between Rockabilly and Psychobilly? What's your definition? Man, you know, anymore, it's, the delineation is so minute now, I think. I think it's just, it's kind of like all become one big sound. So all the Rockabilly people are going Psycho or something? Well, Psychobilly's more punk rock. It's more punk. It's not as traditional 50s. Right, right. Yeah, it's a little more horror inspired, I guess, you know. Yeah. And like. Well, as everybody in Rockabilly is very much more about like the real old school-y traditional, you know. Yeah, there seems to be a schism there. Because I used to, actually, it's funny because I used to go to the, I used to have a Rockabilly night in the valley up by my house and I used to go. And I'm not really into Rockabilly, but I'm into the girls. I'm into the look. I'm into the boys too. And so I'd be sitting there and it's like, hey, hey, daddy-o, you digging this? And they're doom, doom, doom, doom. But that's not what you do. No, no. We do not. We don't have an upright bass. Sometimes we don't even have a bass player. So it's just. Right. Sometimes we have two bass players. So it just all depends on who shows up that night. So, so, so. But it rocks hard. I mean, it's hard rock music. It does. We'll hear some later. Yeah. And, but who dubbed you Jimmy Psycho? You know, that, that all started like back on the East Coast. Everybody just kind of like, you refer to each other as like by the first name, then whatever band they were in. So it was like Jimmy Psycho Charger. And then it kind of just got shortened. Okay. So you started from the East Coast. Yeah. Where in the East Coast? New York City. Oh, wow. Okay. That was the genesis. So Psycho Charger started in New York City. Yeah. We were up and down at East Coast every weekend, every night. I can imagine. Yeah. It was fun though. Oh, a lot of fun. A lot of fun. Great scene. Great scene. Right, right. Any Psycho stories from the road? One time we were in Miami. Yeah. And this is a true story. One time we were in Miami and we're in Little Haiti and we're loading out in the middle of nowhere, three o'clock in the morning in Little Haiti. A goat appears. Right. Coming up the street with us. Did you sacrifice it? No. We're heading out of town and we go, this guy's going to end up being somebody's dinner. So we actually put the goat in the van with us. We drove back up to New York City with the goat in tow. Nice. You put some paper down in the van. Just flush your goat. A goat's not like a dog. We all kind of, oh, he's got to go to the bathroom. He'll let us know. And he just flees all over? No. He just kind of. Dropped his duties. Just shit all over everybody. The best part was that we were in Georgia and we let the goat out of the van. And there's like three Georgia highway patrolmen looking at us with the goat getting out of the van. They thought you were going to sacrifice the goat. Actually, we had a show on the way back in. Did you guys milk it? No, it was a male goat. I was going to say, yeah. But there was one lady that wanted to take the goat off our hands, but she said she was a goat worshiper. And we're like, well, that's what we do. We said, we're afraid to ask. So. So you let it loose in New York City? So we ended up going. Be free. He made it to Virginia and then he went to somebody that had a really nice farm. And I guess he's still happy and doing goat stuff. We're hoping. Good thing you had some goat farmer. We had some goat farmer friends that kind of. Let's go back now. Is there a lot of rockabilly people in Little Haiti? I don't recall. There was a great little place in it called Churchill's. And it was like a British pub in the middle of Little Haiti. Right. And it was like this little punk rock, rockabilly live music venue. Right. About the size of this room. Okay. It was great. Yeah. It was the best. Yeah. So Missy's here. And Missy, very exciting. Yeah. Because you were fainting at it last time you were in the studio. But it's official. You're going to be on Face Off. Yeah. On season nine. On Sci-Fi Channel. When does that premiere? July 28th. July 28th. So. Yeah. Your life's already changed a little bit. Fuck yeah. A whole hell of a lot. It's been a fucking crazy experience. And it's been good, but it's been crazy. Because now it's just been a few. Has there even been commercials yet where you're on? Yeah. There's been commercials. It's announced all over the internet. Yeah. Yay. Your pictures. I mean, they have a picture of the whole cast. And your hair does stand out amongst the crowd. Oh, yeah. I look like a fucking haunted Cheeto in like a field of gray. That's hot. I mean, that's good. Yeah. That's good. Why was the field gray? Um, they wanted everybody in like gray scale. And then the host like in pink. So she would pop. But I don't know why they put me right behind her. Because I'm like a fucking ray of like satanic-ness behind this chick that's like blonde and hot. Well, I think they wanted to do the like the rainbow for the gay marriage without actually doing the half. Maybe that's what they were thinking. I think we forgot the other colors though. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. And I think this season did have the most number of gay people out of any other season, which is pretty fucking rad. Yeah. I think it's awesome. Yeah. So they're getting into horror makeup a lot? Because gays have always been in makeup. Yeah. But now we're into like bloody makeup like this? Season nine is, to me, like not like any other season. Faceoff has had a lot of talented artists, but I feel like season nine was a really, really diverse group of talent. so everybody was competing against each other. It was really anyone's game, honestly, which is really cool, and I think that's going to be cool for the season. Right, and, you know, we've alluded to this, but us old geezers are so jealous because you're 20 years old. You're not even drinking age yet, and you're already on national TV. Yeah. And so when did you start doing makeup? Like horror makeup? I've always been into it. I've always been into horror. I've always been into the occult, for sure, and, I mean, the thing that actually got me into horror was being in Catholic school and hating it and thinking it was stupid. Catholic school does it to everyone. So when you heard his code word story, you were thinking all sorts of things. Catholic school. Yep. But who was the first person you put makeup, scary makeup on? Myself. Yeah? Yeah, I used to just sit there and put makeup on myself as much as I could, and from there, just started work, and then, like, two days after I graduated high school, I was at makeup designery in Burbank, and after that, I've been working ever since. Is that where you met your surrogate mom, Josie Cat, or? Yeah, actually. Is she a... Big sister. Well, that's what I keep saying. She put an ad in for makeup artists through mud, and it was for a fetish music video, and nobody wanted to do it because they thought it was porn, and I was like, I'll fucking do it. That's rad. Was that so close? Yeah, that was the video you were in. That's the video I was in. That's why people thought it was porn. But, uh... Yeah. Yeah, so... And, uh... So, that was the first time you guys met? The first time you guys worked together? Yeah. Because you've been... You've become very close. Yeah. Yeah, we've worked together a lot. Right. Yes. And we hang out together, and she's... We are like family. Right. And you're gonna be on TV soon, too. Yes, next week, I will be on TLC for Dare to Wear. Dare to Wear. Now, you know when you go on the TLC website. And so will you. You're on it, too. Yes, I am on it. For a second. But you know when you go... It's funny, because TLC canceled Honey Boo Boo, and since then, you've been on a lot. Yeah, I'm starting to become a TLC regular. I don't know. I just worked with the makeup artist and the hairdresser last night for one of their shows. Josie Boo Boo. Oh. But I'd watch that. But on the TLC website, it says Dare to Wear are two fashion, and I'm quoting, fashion disasters that switch clothes. Right. Right. So you're a fashion disaster. I am a total disaster on that show. And I switch with someone who is basically a churchy and very conservative. And I'm not allowed to say anything on the show, but I'm on the commercial. Right. And her... You pop out of the dressing room and do the Josie Cat pose. I come out of the dressing room. They introduce me. I come out, and I'm in leopard with a spiked jacket, and she... is basically a woman of African-American descent, if I want to be politically correct. Is that the host or the person you switch with? I switch with. Okay. And she's heavier set than I am and in a muumuu. Right. So we swap. Okay. Basically swap clothing for a few days. So when you saw that there was a larger woman, what did you do? Oh, that didn't have anything to do with it. It was the muumuu. I didn't see you in a muumuu. Did I? No, they had me in another outfit that I can't talk about, or you can't. Right. I understand. Because you signed a release, too. I saw you in an outfit that wasn't a muumuu, but it was interesting. It wasn't flattering. Put it that way. It's pretty funny. You gotta see that. The show's funny. Right. It's funny. And at the, you know, it's basically putting people in... It's like wife swap, but clothing. I like the current shirt you're wearing. It's very nice. Thank you. Oh, that's right. You are wearing this shirt. I'm sorry. Distracted by the cleavage. So when did you first meet the psycho? We actually met when Psycho Charger played Ink and Iron like five years ago. Somehow, Josie ended up in our room in the Queen Mary. That's when you were in New York. I was living in New York at the time. He was living in New York, and it was an after party. I had worked... I've been a booth bitch forever for all the conventions. Right. And I worked that night. When everyone finishes, we party at the Queen Mary. Now you tell me. Yeah. We party with the bands, and a lot of the out-of-town bands are staying on the ship. Right. So it's fun. Yeah, that was fun. That was the inaugural meeting, and somehow she had the only bottle of vodka left. You know, they run a tight lid on that contraband there. She seems to... She seems to always have the last bottle of vodka. Were you familiar with this aunt when she crashed your party? No, but I definitely looked it up since I got back on the East Coast there. Well, the reason I say that is because I actually took Josie to see your wife's wonderful show, Stargirls, a couple months ago. And that has seemed to spark the collaboration between you two. And you were already thinking about... I was actually thinking about, yes. About having her sing on your record. Yeah. Yeah. And so, because you... I don't know why I'm telling this story, but you're at the show. Well, you're telling me about the show that's coming up. Well, you're at... No, here's the thing. So you're at the show, and you're like, I've got this project that you'd be perfect for. And it was great, because... Let me just say, Josie was singing with a glam metal band. What's good? You know, personality-wise, whatever. It wasn't your style of music, really. Not at all. And you were singing somebody else's lyrics. Exactly. And now you're back in the punk scene hanging out with your punk people. And it's... It's horror, which... Horror. You can't get any better than that. Yay! Because it's basically back to my roots when I was 18 years old and working with Ana Garage. Right. It's so cool, you know, full circle. Right. You know? Yeah. Because I can say, the song that we did is like, I go, okay, I'm not going to be able to sing this song, or I don't really... But Josie was honestly, she was like in the top three people. And I go, this is who I want... You know, when I saw her, I go, this is the person. This is going to make the most sense to make this happen, so... Right. And we worked with Gator. Right. I mean, I've known Gator for years. Right. From Coffin Drivers. So it was just great to be... I felt like I was back home again. Well... You know, with my people. Yeah. I can't say the title. I can't say... I can just say it's a cover of a classic. And we're going to play like a little bit of it. Yeah, we can give away a little bit. Just a little bit. And it's... We can't say it's a Ramones cover, right? Can we say that? You just said it, but no. Yeah, we can say... It's a New York band cover. New York band cover. And it's a classic horror movie. And they're making a remake at the same time. Right. And it has to do with some very big horror conventions who now has a record label. Yes. Right. And so... So this is... We need to go out for drinks and get tired. Yeah. So this is... Now, this is a record label that's putting on a compilation of horror... Covers of horror movies on drag. And I'll be producing the video for it. Yeah. Right. And let's... And we'll talk about that. 20 seconds. Hold on. Let's play 20 seconds of this. I haven't heard it. And we'll talk about that. 20 seconds. Hold on. Let's play 20 seconds of this. I haven't heard it. Let's do it. There we go. There we go. There we go. You don't know what that song is. I know. You're listening. You're watching the wrong show. It's the wrong show. We had four members of that band on the show in January. We did. We did. Anyway. It was one of my favorite shows. That was a good show. So, yeah. So, Psycho Charger is still charging along. Still making it happen. Yeah. Yeah. So, Psycho Charger, when Courtney was here, she was telling us about, and this is one of the pictures. It's the picture of the beautiful, naked, pregnant woman covered in blood that they're going to show right now, which is Courtney. And she said you talked her into that. Yeah. I kind of like had this, you know, every Psycho Charger record is called something of the psycho. And so, I go, spawn of the psycho. And it only made sense that we get an eight-month-old pregnant. So, you impregnated her for the album cover. Naturally. It was all, you know, a pre-planned thing. Yeah. So, they're showing it right now, I believe. And it's, I have never seen a pregnant woman covered in blood that gave me a boner before, but she did. It's so crazy. It's hot. Gator was saying that when we were recording. I'm sure he did. And he had some people in the studio, and there was a copy of the album. Great. And the lines think alike. She gave me a copy of that. Yeah. It's funny. You try to describe it, but you just don't know until you see it, right? Yeah. And then when you see it, and it got banned from iTunes? Or we got banned from iTunes? Yeah. Yeah. The iTunes kicked back the artwork, so we had the censored, where it's just the outline of a pregnant. Wow. That's even creepier. Yeah. It's kind of weird. Yeah. So. So, it's just alien. Yeah. But we shot that in the living room where we live. Well, speaking of alien, that's a great segue. Yeah. Because you have an alien. Yeah. Alien alter ego. Yeah. I had the Jimmy Psycho experiment. Experiment. You don't even know your bands. Alien. Alien lounge band. It's a Jimmy Psycho experiment. It's an alien lounge band. And you put, they're showing a picture right now, you put an alien mask on, and you kind of lounge it up a little bit. Yeah. Because, you know, this whole thing came about because Psycho Charged is always very loud and concussive, and all the bands I play with is very loud and concussive. So, in my downtime, I listen to a lot of really easy music, and lounge music is some of that, and I kind of go, you know? Right. There needs to be like a punk rock lounge band or something like that. And you do Bloodscreep Bob, right? Yeah, we do. There's a video that they just put up. It's pretty cool. Yeah. But with an alien mask. As aliens, yeah. Yeah. Because we do it at the Stargirl show. Right. July 31st at Dragonfly, by the way. Which is the same night as my show. But it seems to happen. The last show you did, I had the show the same night. I don't mean to do this. But, uh. But. But trust me, there'll be more people at Stargirls than my show. I guarantee it. And with good reason. So, but you'll be doing your alien mask and the whole thing? Yeah, the alien lounge band will be at Dragonfly on July 31st. Stargirl show. Yes, Nicole? That's the song. The song is the do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Oh, okay. Do-do-do. Oh. It's the alien lounge band song. Oh, okay. I'm sorry. Too much Frappuccino. But, uh. I think anybody who's an actual Star Wars nerd knew exactly what I was doing. Oh, you're doing the Star Wars aliens song. Okay. I'm sorry. By the way, that was a moment of intelligence by Nicole Six. I would just call it a moment of being a geek. We try to have one every show. But, uh. But, Missy, we're talking about, uh. Because you're on the website now. Some strange proposals from men and women. Yeah. I've had some weird shit. First day it got announced, my inbox got annihilated with, like, dick pics and, like, dude. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Welcome to my world. We're going to get to you in a second. We're going to get to you in a second. It's been like that for years. You're single by choice. Yeah. I'm single by choice. So, a big, big face off fan base in India. I don't fucking know. I don't know. I just. It was the weirdest thing because I'm really not used to, like. Don't check the other box. The box marked other. Oh, I checked that. Don't check that one. You were telling us in the lobby there was an Indian guy that showed you a picture of his feet. Yeah. Yeah. I've had a couple dudes send me pictures of their feet. Do they caption it? I mean, is it just, like, just feet or what? Yeah. I've had just pictures of feet. I've had dudes ask me to see my feet and I'm like, oh, fuck no. You're like, send me 50 bucks to my PayPal. Yeah. It's strange. I've had guys try to pay me to see my feet, but that's just. It's weird shit. You know, it's. I needed the money, but. No, it's okay. But. So, yeah. Just everybody. Everybody. This is just the tip of the iceberg. Because when it shows, you're going to be inundated. Yeah. At your tender young age of 20. It's so weird because I'm used to, you know, pretty much growing up being considered unattractive. And now I'm on national TV and I have all these dudes talking to me. Well, who considered you unattractive? I don't get this. It's been my whole life. I'm more than looking. Oh, will you stop it? You're beautiful. Stop it. Oh, thanks. I don't know you guys. I'm being completely serious. Thanks. You know that. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I've seen you post pictures. Her photos are gorgeous. Yeah. People on Facebook go nuts. I guess. It's a new thing for me. It's really new. I'm not used to the attention. Josie, Nicole, how does she get used to that? I'd screen now. I had a person in the middle of an active, not quite coitus, once ask me if I would make them famous. That was back when I was just doing PR stuff for certain clients. And I was just like, yeah, sure, kid. I'll make you a star. And then I didn't go out with them again. Do you have people that want you to teach them how to do makeup? Yeah. I have a lot of that, which is cool. I mean, the cool fans are always welcome. Like anybody that wants to watch me. You'll meet people who'll be all, they'll want you to put them on TV because they'll assume you have those kind of connections. Yeah. And you know. Oh, yeah. People think you're super star rich too. And Josie's on a different level. There's so many things people probably ask Josie for. Yeah. I guess as a segue, when you were on Porn to Rock and Playboy TV, what kind of, and of course, this was back in the, you know, the, you know, the, you know, the, you know, golden age pre cell phones and smartphones and internet, but. It was, well, 2003. Okay. So it was the face, the MySpace days. You were, you were, you were nine and you were. It was MySpace days. Oh, it was 2003. I graduated that year. Yeah. I had like a hundred thousand people on that page. Right. And how many feet, feet pictures and weird dick pics and things like, I guess dick pics weren't a big thing back in 2003. It's been a recent phenomenon. Yeah. Yeah. There wasn't a lot of that. I guess it abs a lot on MySpace. Dude showing me their abs. Hmm. There's not one story of one weird stalkers guy on the internet you can share with our audience. Oh gosh. Gary Hudson. Oh, Gary. Yeah. Gary was really bad. I mean, he started, this guy, Gary would comment on everything and would comment on anything I commented on and would start fights with my friends. Um, and he wasn't even in this country. He was in the UK and, and got my page pulled and it was just a nightmare. Um, I was hoping for something a little funnier. I was going to say, I will give this advice. I just block anyone fucking weird. I did. I did have someone send me a picture of their penis and a beer can next to it, which was impressive. For reference? Yeah. For a reference point. I was like, all right. So, so, so, so once in a while, you see a dick that surprised you? Yeah. Yeah. I thought that was very creative. Yeah. You know, that's probably one of those, uh, yeah, it's probably something from the mini fridge or something like that. That's why I need to get like a little, little vodka bottle, like from a mini fridge. That's not for Barbies. Right. But stick it next to my dick. You think it's a real bottle. Oh. Oh. There it is. Exactly. That's my fact. I know. Let's see. The things that, the things I think about between the show, but I thought you, I thought you were the youngest, uh, contestants ever been on Face Off, but no. No, no, no. No, no, no. Uh, season eight had Emily and she was 18, I think, when she was on the show. Right. Yeah. How far did she go? Uh, she made it to the finale. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. And, uh, so, uh, so, um, I mean, have you gotten any work out of this? Um. Besides Joseph Cat videos? I mean, I've had more people recognize me, which is, you know, going to the Instagram. Once it airs, you're going to meet contacts on it and it'll be on your IMDB page. Yeah. But I mean, I'm very less. I'm lucky to have like a really great list of like friends and clients and people that I love to work with. Right. That keeps me busy. I've been insanely busy. So. So you're always, you're always making money. You're always working. Yeah. I mean. Well, you're always working. She was just teaching up in San Francisco. Yeah. I was just teaching and, um. Well, now you tell me. Yeah. I work in a shop in the Valley. I just came back today. Autonomous FX. But I wouldn't be shocked at all if you were to get an actual horror film or something out of this, you know. Yeah. So I'm working, I'm walking dead. No, I didn't work. I'm walking dead. No, no, no. Oh, that's a different person. Sorry. No. No, I've worked in a lot of different shops. Just building stuff for, I mean, different shows. Like, I've worked on a lot of different shows, like building stuff for, like pre-production. Right. Onset stuff, not so much. Okay. I definitely like being in the shop a lot more. Is that, is that, is that kind of where, like, first you start in the shop and then you get on set? Is that kind of the way it goes? Sometimes. A lot of times you have to be in the union. And as of right now, I just want to do shop stuff. That's more my interest. I like building things, fabricating, doing mic stands, things like that. Yeah. I was at, I was at Signutron's house and he's got the mold from Naked Lunch at the typewriter and he's also got a mold of Jeff Goldblum's hand from The Fly. Do you have anything creepy and unique in your head? Oh God, I have tons of stuff. I'm kind of a hoarder. Whenever I find something weird and unusual, I bring it home. So I have, I have a lot of stuff. I have tons of creepy shit. I just worked on a music video a couple days ago and I ended up bringing basically all their props just by my own collection. Right. So I have tons of stuff. I love taxidermy. Who's the band? Who's the band? Oh, One's Human. One's Human. It's Lauren Hart and Logan Mader. He used to be in Machine Head. Oh, okay. Yeah. And I just did their music video, the makeup for it, and it was awesome. Everything's super bitchin'. And once it comes out, I'll be able to like, share that. And you did, you did a mic stand for me, which I'll be using on my show on July 31st. Awesome. If you don't go to Stargirls, you should go to that. But, and Josie was saying that you used actual bones. Yeah. Yeah. Josie's has actual bones all over it. Where do you get that? What kind of bones? Oh, I have all kinds. They do taxidermy work on the side. So yeah, I have tons of bones. Have you been to Hyena Gallery in Burbank? Oh yeah. I love Hyena. Yeah, it's the best. Oh yeah. So. They have a bone collection too. My friend Clint makes most of those bones. Oh, nice. So, I mean, are these like chicken bones? Are they? There's all sorts of bones. I have everything from human to cow to bison, all kinds of stuff. That's awesome. I'm trying to figure out. I'm going to have to look at my mic stand and see what kind of bones there are. I guess. Barbara. It's better if you don't know. There's a little mystery to it then. I guess so. I guess so. So, where did you meet Courtney Cruz? How did that? Well, how did the psycho meet the mother of the spotter psycho? That story is, she tells the story much better than I ever will. But we, Psycho Charger had a song in the remake of the film, Night of the Demons. It came out like five years ago. In the remake of Night of the Demons? Yeah. So, we had a song in that movie. And so, the director of that movie wanted to put on a show that showcased like all the bands that were, or some of the bands that had music on. Yeah. And the soundtracks was like Us and 45 Grave. Right. The Barbarella tones. So, Courtney was in charge of putting that show together. Right. And so, that's how we met. And so, the thing is, her story is a little different than mine. But I saw her and I go, oh, wow, all right. That seems to be the difficult way to have it. She was not very happy with me the first night we met because we did the show. Nobody told her that we stripped down to our underwear and covered ourselves in blood. Right. And she was in charge of cleaning up that mess. Oh. Oh. Yes. Oh, I've been banned about five times for that. Oh, we're going to get to the butt mess. We're going to get to the butt mess. Missy was all in on that. Yes. Oh, yeah. So, she saw you in your underwear covered with blood and had to clean up after you. Yeah. And now you're married. I know. I think I would do that the rest of my life. I wanted to take her out as a, someday to take her out as a. Yes. Repentance or whatever. Right. Were you still covered in blood in your underwear? No, actually. You dressed up and you cleaned up. I cleaned up. Okay. Okay. Because Missy has blood wrestled. Oh, yeah. At your shows before. Yeah. Yep. And not only did you sneak her into a actual Cleveland over bar, and you did that at the premiere of the road video, right? Yes. Yes. We got in trouble there. Big time. The security. I was wondering what happened. So pissed. And a fight broke out too between a couple of my friends. It was chaos. It was chaos. My boot broke and I fell on my face. The heel. My face was. I heard about that. Virginia told me about that. I was supposed to host that show with our friend Virginia Jones instead. It was fun chaos. The turnout was great. And everyone came in costume, which was really cool. A lot of Mad Max costumes. Everyone dressed up and we had grinders and a whole, you know, dead carpet. And I had all, Missy made headdresses for everybody. So we were all. Now, when did you first blood wrestle for this woman? And how did she talk you into it? Um. Your surrogate mother. I wrestled with them the first time we did it for a Carrera show. And they needed girls to do it. And my best friend, Sarah, did it. And then Jenna. Right. Beckwith or Sasha Knox. Yeah. Did it. And they ended up like pulling me in while they were wrestling. And then after that, I just did it. So just someone pulled you in and you're like, oh, okay. I might as well just do it anyway. I was like, fuck yeah. I mean, I'm covered in this shit every day. Yeah. Right. You know. Work. Because they got your band from King King. They got your band from three clubs. Right. They got your band from Loaded. I used to do it with Piss Hand. But I didn't get banned back then. I didn't think it was going to be such a problem. Well, you used to sing topless with stickers over your tits, too. Yeah. Yeah. I had a whole huge stage show thing, that performance that I did. I've seen some of the videos. It's just, yeah, you don't put stickers on the boobs anymore. Well, I've toned down a bit. I mean, I was in my early 20s. I just, you know, I'd rather go. You hear that? I see shirt off with stickers on your boobs. I all have other girls do it now. Oh, I've been naked on stage for Josie. I've been on a leash. Yeah, I remember a leash. I had her come up and I fed her dog food. I had her on a leash. Yeah, I was like, I didn't know what you were eating. But she was on stage, covered in blood, with a leash, just eating something. I'm all, that is a fetish. Was that really dog food? No, actually, it was. Was it like supper food or something? It was something that I made. It was like a gourmet. It was like a soup. Yeah. Out of a dog bowl. Yeah, I was like. I've had your gourmet cooking, Josie. It was like totally organic. It was totally fucking good. It was organic. It's all good. Greater joke. I actually get cooked. No, actually, you never have cooked for me, but that's fine. I'll cook for you. No, that's okay. But not after the dog food. I'll cook before you leave. It's sushi? Anyway. No, I was going to say. Sushi and snacks. Sushi and the waffles. Why do you think I said that? No, but I was going to. Is Pissy still an entity? Is it still a band? We have a recording studio. Right. And we. Because in the video, it's just you and the guitar player. Right. Right. Because. His name is? Dave. Dave Foster. He is currently performing with Skin Mask. Right. And we still record. So we're going to start licensing songs. Okay. But I don't think there's going to be any live performances anytime soon. Because the road. I mean, he's keeping me busy. Yeah, I see that. I can see this is a whole nother thing. Yeah. Sing one song. Then sing two songs. Then sing three songs. Oh, the noodly singer psycho. But with Pissant now the road video is the road song was on. And the So Close video that I was in that Missy did the break up for we're all in an album that was out a few years ago. What is that album? Um, which album was that? I have to think because I pulled songs from different albums. It's not Piss Off. And it's not Piss Off. It's not Piss Off. It's just a song. It's just a song. It's just a song. It's just a song. It's just a song. not your best sucks because i have those two uh i don't know anyway but so i guess there was there was some album that yeah i'll look up your discography later later but i'll have to look at my itunes but uh and and those were we're just creating a catalog so we could license the songs because that's where it's at right now and both those songs are decidedly not punk right so close it's more it's almost a trip-hop song and and the song victoria which was a vampire song that um syn fisted is in right that's a slow song too because so close it's almost a trip-hop song and the road is kind of a funk song so you're branching out no we've always been kind of all over the place that's right when you said in the early 90s when i put the band together did we not fit anywhere we didn't fit anywhere because i had a metal band basically and i was a punk rocker and um as different members came and went the band evolved and kind of went with the sound with the rhythm section because it was the guitar player myself and so every time there was a up until um amy and jeff came in the band they were in the band for about six years and that's when we did most of the work you know the touring and a lot of the tv shows and stuff like that do you have any good tour stories besides you know that it can match up with the goats she didn't have dog food on a stage and i'm sure you've had movies too uh oh yeah yeah we've we've had some interesting shows i mean what's coming to mind right now just tell us just blurt it out um we got popped for pornographic video covers on the way up to canada and we were interrogated probably for about five hours um gotten so much trouble with the promoters up there came back and ended up playing a strip club and having pizza and partying with the security all night yeah parked the van out front and it kind of turned into a really weird night i won't say anymore well was it was a strip club on the canadian side or on our side on our side because we didn't get into canada okay all right yeah how do you how do you rustle up a strip club gig at the last minute made some phone calls and how did how did because i've done comedy a lot of times i've done comedy a lot of times i've done strip clubs it doesn't go over too well how does we play jumbos a couple times really yeah i think jumbos is a good fit for that yeah i had a birthday party there and and piss ant played it was fun and we also did um one of the other ones the one that's on uh labrea did you put stickers on your tits for those or no no no so a fully clothed what is on there those were my earlier shows right you know yeah it's the one that has the buffet right crazy girls crazy girls yeah that was it which i would not eat a buffet at a strip club but that's crazy girls has a buffet because i know a lot of men in the rock and roll industry okay well speaking of that so jimmy psycho so you got the the psycho charger where's the time go psycho charger the jimmy psycho experiments and anything else there's a show coming up and we're doing a video well august 14th august 14th we'll be singing with psycho chargers i saw that where's that gonna be that's gonna be at the dragonfly for the devil's playground devil's playground you're doing a grindhouse burlesque show actually it's courtney cruz and olivia bella fontaine's thing this will be fun yeah and was what married to him and produced a bunch of yes i know i don't get navidad she's coming out for a special appearance yeah she won't come to the dark mark show but she will come to you i'm just gonna put up a great art gallery of uh exploitation posters right it's gonna be off the hook good we haven't even started promoting it and we already have like and we're shooting a video for the song that you couldn't really hear right are you gonna be directing the video josie i'm i'm gonna be i don't think you're gonna be bossing around the director as usual yes and missy's gonna do the makeup we're all in it together here yeah would you like to be a a voodoo woman or a yeah a skull dance yeah we're casting the video right now so she's just gonna basically pour a bucket of blood over you and you're gonna be in your underwear do you want me to change my hair color or do you want me whatever you want okay well we'll talk see we'll talk it's not a show we're just making connections here yeah that's all we do anyway jimmy if people want to get a hold of you how do they get a hold of you uh jimmy psycho.com psychocharger.com right and that oh by the way that show is august 14th we didn't i just put it on my calendar august 14th because you're gonna be that's a friday and missy uh you're gonna be on face off and then when is that premiere again uh july 28th face off premiere season nine right yeah and uh uh you can't say how far you go you go but uh you'll just have to watch it's worth watching into the first episode because you never know yeah are you the drama queen um i hope not we'll see how they edit it there's no there's no outbursts um i mean watch maybe i don't know that sounds like there's gonna be an outburst or two but i hope you throw down i'm a dirty metal head of the show if you look at the cast picture it's obvious are you the youngest one on this show uh yeah i think i am okay well i know you're the youngest one in the studio but you're the youngest one on face off yeah i'm the youngest one on my season right yeah okay well so don't worry you're the little brat um i mean i don't act like an asshole but i mean right no i just don't piss her off put it that way yeah just don't piss me off i'm sure i'm sure i don't want to be wrestling her with blood i don't know if you really want to do this but when people can follow you on facebook and twitter it's missy monster fx yeah uh facebook missy munster um twitter and instagram is at missy munster fx right um yeah because you posted some other twitter that i was like what for missy i think you missed it uh maybe i didn't have my glasses anyway so uh since uh uh since you left your blindfolds at home can you remember your how people get old to you or just google me josie j-o-s-i cat k-a-t and you'll find all my websites right and uh the order uh percent of uh songs on itunes and the josie cat's book and all the other stuff that she does the book's no longer on amazon oh i saw it used to be on the internet used for two hundred dollars what oh good yeah nice no no you don't get any of that but yeah there's some people i need to talk to i need to call my publishing company uh does the does a bottle of assling up with that or no pardon i trust you josie cat don't say it again i heard you and speaking of books go to nicole6.com some some fucked up shit thank you go to gothmedian.com doing some shows upcoming in vegas and la and just a one one note before we go and i really should i this is the last show that jenny our border opera producer is working oh bye jenny i love you part of the reason the show is so good is because of her and uh and we're gonna miss you bye jenny and thank you for asking for me can i just say yeah i i wanted you to come josie can i just say that the first time that i started here was with your show and i'm ending with your show oh really yeah that's just not coming no oh wow today yeah i thought that was cool that was crazy small circle what show was that by the way you know do you remember uh i remember josie was here no i don't remember it was two years ago in october so oh okay yeah wow it's uh there's there's nobody better well i'm sure you're gonna be very good yeah but she she's she's the best and we're gonna miss her and uh and uh so on that sad note like the first thing where you feel like you should sing a song but there's no goodbye jenny song yes goodbye jenny bye jenny jenna jenna wait wait yeah it's a see you later okay we'll see we'll see you later and uh so uh we're gonna get actually instead of singing 8 6 7 5 3 0 9 jenny we're going to be uh playing us some psycho charger on the way out so everybody have a wonderfully creepy week bye We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. You're sweet until you suck on the cock. Boy, if I had a dime for every woman that told me that. So, but how did you get to America? So you were American at 15? Yes, I went from Saigon to Oregon. I first went to Oregon first. Wow, there's a culture shock. Yeah, it was a big culture shock. I didn't know any English. I heard you were self-taught. I was self-taught. I was forced to because there's not many Asian in Oregon. There is now. Where I was. Yeah, is it? Yeah, there is now. I went to Florida. There is a lot. Sandal backed me up on that one. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Because my family is so conservative, so they sent me to a private school. So did your family move to Oregon? Is that what happened? No, no. I was sent for as a student program, like a student international study exchange. And I stay with a host family, which is American as well. And I was forced to learn English. And I went to these private schools. And I was like, oh, my God, you know. Catholic schools. I went to Catholic school. And I guess your parents probably were thinking, well, you'll go to America. You'll go to Catholic school. You'll learn some discipline. Yeah, I went to homeschool, Catholic school during high school. And yeah, discipline, all girls school. And of course. And of course, that's the worst. Because you're. It kind of backfires. Exactly. The Catholic school girl outfit. I posted a picture on Instagram and Facebook of you in a Catholic school girl outfit. You wear it very well. I love Catholic school girl outfit. I remember I always got in trouble because I keep. Rolling them up. Because, you know, the real Catholic school girl is not as slutty as a costume looking one. And. No. I wish it is. I wish it is. And I try to make it as it was. Right. And I just keep rolling it up, rolling it up. And I remember every morning the nuns would come in my classroom. Always getting in trouble. Rolling up the shirt or rolling up the dress? No, rolling up the skirt so it would be shorter. Rolling up the waistband so it comes up higher. Ah, Santa knows it. Yeah, Santa knows it. Because there's a naughty list and a nice list. And somehow you have to do something to get on the naughty. Right. So you're a naughty little colon stocking once in a while. Yeah, the nuns would always say, your skirt gets too short. And of course you being the only Asian girl in the school, I'm sure. I was the only Asian girl. The boys with the Asian fetish. Oh, man, if I really need to talk to the guys, I need to learn English somehow. Right. So you learned English the hard way? Well, let's see. Let's say I got to be a teacher's pet. I'll bet you didn't. I love being teacher's pet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The English teacher really liked you. The English teacher pet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So because you speak really well. I mean, you speak very, very well. Oh, thank you. Thank you. We've had some people that were born in America that don't speak near as well as you on the show. It's weird to me sometimes. I mean, I could do some broken English as well. Yeah, I know. And I'm sure you've had to do that in your adult films. Yeah, like sucky, sucky. You know, typical one. Well, that's the thing. Because you've done a lot of massage parlor porn. That's like a... Massage. Massage. You know, the... The stereotype porn. Yeah. No, tell me about it. I don't know what you're talking about. I love it. I enjoyed it. Something like this. Oh, Harold, big boy. He's on table. Or happy ending massage. Yeah. Happy ending massage. Oh, you want to massage me too? Okay. I'm pretty good now. I could be a certified massage therapist now. When was the first time a guy told you, love you, long time? When did you hear that one first? I think it was when I first came here. With some... It was some of my... My friends. And we were talking and they showed me the movie that you guys watch. It's the Full Metal Jacket or something like that. And there was a Vietnamese girl in there. I say, $5, $5. Yeah. Did you hear the song, the Miso Horny? No, no. I didn't hear the song. Well, you've heard it, right? You've heard it since, right? Yeah, yeah. I heard it since. Yeah. Okay. So, I just... Boy, that question went nowhere. So, anyway. Here's what I was intrigued by also. And... Because we'll get to you, Santa. Because you've been... No rush. No rush. You've been doing a lot of things lately. And not just your usual thing. But Santa actually has been... He's been dabbling a little bit. You had a... It was a Vegas? You had a whole thing? You were... Whoa, Santa. You went to Vegas. We went to Vegas to shoot a commercial. Right. We shot a commercial for Lion's Den, which is an online adult appliance store. You have Lion's Den, Cindy? Oh, interesting. Tell me more, Santa. So, now we can get you a discount at Lion's Den. Yeah, I love when Santa talks dirty. It was cool. We did a parody on Fifty Shades of Grey. Oh, really? So, Santa was Mr. Grey, and it was pretty cool. Oh, that's hilarious. I'd love to see that. That's probably better than the actual movie. It probably is. If you look at the trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey... Well, you're not in it, so... I'm not in that, but I'm in this parody that we did. And we did things like he had reindeer in his office. Oh, that's hilarious. And they were tied up. Right. It was good. It was fun. It was a good time. Yeah. We did a few other little things. Things like... I got... Hang on. We got some... I got a naughty one. I think he's got a phone call. No, Josie's been naughty, and she left her phone in the car, so... Oh, Josie. We gotta spank her when she's come in, Dad. Oh, I'm sure that will happen. Yes, we will. Probably more than once. Probably more than once. Yes. I want you to get all dirty. So, anyway. So, how did they contact you? How did they... How did Santa Claus... They contacted me through my agent. The agent knew that I'd done commercials, so... Right. Set me up with that, so I drove out to Vegas and hung out there in the studio for a while, and it was good. And there was another scene in it, too, totally different than the Fifty Shades of Grey. Right. Where the line was, before I leave on my World Ride trip for giving away gifts... Right. I always like to make sure that Mrs. Claus gets her gift first. I bet she did. I picked up a box and... Nice. Pretty well done. It was a good bunch of people. It was a lot of fun. Very interesting. So, I'm glad you're getting some work on your off hours. Yeah, because the Santa thing, you know, 24 hours one day a year, you got to find something else to do. Right. Managing the elves is one thing, but you need to kind of get out there. Oh, sure. Yeah, so... Oh, Santa sure gets out there. Now, this... Oh, look who's here. The naughty girl. Hello there. Josie's here. Josie Kent. Do you know... You know Santa Claus. Yes. Hi, Santa. Hi there. Good to see you again. Hi. And this is Cindy Starfall. Hi. She's been in some... We were saying that you're a bit naughty. Yeah. And that you need some spanking, right? Oh, yeah. So, we're going to... Yeah. Well, we're going to talk a little bit more. We're going to do all... He's like, we're going to talk a little bit more. We're going to talk a little bit more because... I don't know if you're aware because Cindy's been in such great films as Squirtgasms, Orgy Masters 3, and Naughty Nanny. Naughty Nanny. And Femme Dom Ass Worship 18. Yeah, that is the other side of me. I have two sides, the submissive side, and then there's the dominated side of me. Which one's your favorite? That's what I was going to ask. Hmm. It's really depending on the guys. You know, I could be very aggressive. What about girls? When it comes to girls, I find that when it comes to girls, I get more aggressive with the girls. Really? And for the guys, I like them to be manhandled. Because I would think... Because there was an interview where you said... You said you like really big, strong guys like Vin Diesel and Celeste Sloan. And Fanna. Fanna and Dark Mark. Bigger than me. Obviously, everybody's bigger than me, right? Right, but you like big, muscular guys, right? I want someone manly that can handle me. Yeah, there's a lot to handle. And I mean, not every woman's been in Throat Fucks 4, but you... But here's the story. Throat Fuck, yeah. And here's the thing, because... Yeah, go ahead, have some brownie brittle. I don't know whose that is, but go ahead. It's not brownies or brittle. What is it? It's crackers. Oh, okay. Who would want to eat crackers before they go on the show? Well, I did want to say that... Whose car is it, brownie brittle? That's Cindy. Yeah, I hate to interrupt. We're doing the show. But Cindy was actually... Cindy's from Vietnam, and I wanted to wait until you got into the door. You had a bad experience in Vietnam last year. Yeah, I had my... I got mugged by someone on a motorcycle. Oh, no. And I was told that that would happen by about... Different people from Vietnam. And they said, don't carry a purse. Yeah. It was my last day. I usually never do carry a purse when I travel. I usually don't carry a purse when I'm out in Hollywood either. You usually don't carry a purse. I don't worry either, but... That's the only way I wear leggings. See you next time. You should have stick me around. Stick you around? Yeah, and bring me with you. So I was going to ask now, when you grew up, I mean, did you go to the rough areas? Did you have any bad stories? The rough area? You mean like the urban area? It's Saigon, when you grew up in Saigon, yeah. You know, when I was growing up, my family doesn't really let me out as much. If I do let out, it would be somebody following me. Right. But I always... So you were that rich. You had like a security retail. I always managed to get out. Right, so you were that... I sneak out. You flipped away on your own, right? I sneak out all the time, and they always know when I'm coming out, because they would be like, oh, so-and-so's granddaughter. So it's just... So you had a security detail? Not like a full security detail that you would think. I mean, I had the drivers, and they would drive me to school. So they would drive me back and forth, so they know where I'm at and everything. But I mean, I do have a rebel... Are you from Ho Chi Minh City? Yeah, I'm from Saigon. But do you still call it Saigon, or do you call it Ho Chi Minh? I call it Saigon, but a lot of people like to call it Ho Chi Minh City. Because it's officially Ho Chi Minh City now. Yeah. It used to be Saigon. Well, thanks for the correction, Josie. Yeah, yeah. Look at her. Josie just got back from bed. Yeah. Josie, the Vietnam historian. But that is always the rebel side of me. No, we know you're a rebel. We know you're a rebel. So I just... Right. Well, I read a story. Into a porn star. I read a story that when you were a little girl, I guess not that little. I'm thinking 13, 14. You used to masturbate in the shower while your nanny was outside. Yes. Yes. You were that sexual that quick. See, I don't remember. I would say I was about 12, 11, around that age. And I was known to take the longest shower. Because my nanny... There's a movie title for you. And a girl needs her private time. Right. Because I can't do it outside. You know, there's always people watching and bugging me. And I found one day that the shower head really feel good. Oh, wow. Oh, you found the shower head at 12. Yeah, right. I was excited. I was excited. I was excited. I was excited. I was exploring. And I just stay in there. Because my nanny always have to wait. Because she get all the towel ready. Right. When I get out. So she always tell my mom, like, she takes a really long shower. I have a towel boy waiting for me, too. I'll bet you do. When was the first time you discovered the shower head, Josie? Wow, that's a good question. Probably... Because every girl knows about the shower head. Oh, yeah. Definitely. 11, 12, about the same time? Yeah, probably. I'd say. I mean, yeah. Maybe a little bit younger. In Vietnam, I didn't know much about vibrators or anything like that. I mean, there's no way you can ask this to go to an adult store like over here. Right. So you got to improvise. Right, right. Well, I mean, I'm sure there's adult stores in Saigon. Well, you're supposed to be 18. You're too. Yeah, I know. So I didn't know much about it. I just feel... I didn't even know when I have an orgasm. I was like, wow, this feels good. But I didn't know what it was. Right. I was like, this just feel good. So every day, I'm in the shower for like an hour. Wow. You're very clean. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. And then Santa... My skin was... Meantime, the nanny's there with a towel waiting for you to come out all naked and wet. I think we got it. Where's Santa? No, Santa's been pretty... Santa's been on our all this. So, Santa, when did you first notice that the shower had tickled the balls really nicely? Wasn't that... I think it was pretty early, probably around nine. It felt good on the shrink tear, all that stuff? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was good. You had to use hot water, though, because cold water was gone. Yes, the cold water was not good. It's got to be hot. But Santa, yeah, Santa's been... Santa's been... Santa's been... Santa's been busy. He's... So, Santa... So, would you say that the boys and girls... His beard is real. No, no. He's the real deal. Yeah, I've been petting him. No, that's not... No, she's been petting me. I've been petting him. And kissing him. So, Santa... What do you think about older men? I love older men. Oh, my God. You ask the right questions. What do you think of older women? I think Jesse's trying to get at something. You just give me like an orgasm asking that. I love older men. Do you want to sit on Santa's lap? Oh, we're going to do that. I want to get the Sidney Starvel story. I want to do that. Actually, we're going to do that very shortly because I got gifts for both of you. Oh. Both of you are going to sit on Santa's lap and we'll see what happens after that. Oh. I'm afraid to find out. I want to... Because Sidney... I know this Santa. He's a naughty one. Because Sidney, I did a lot of research on you. Josie will tell you, I do a lot of research on you. Yeah. A lot of research on you. A lot of story. So, I know about the shower head. I know about Oregon. I know about... But here's... This is... To me, what was really interesting about you is... From what I understand, this is from the stories, how you got into porn and that you were working a... And I don't want to say the company, but you were working a straight corporate job in L. A.? Yeah, a straight corporate job in L. A. What kind of work was it? It was in a fashion company. Were you a salesperson or... A buyer. Yeah. Oh, a buyer. So, you guys may have crossed paths a lot. Because I got the... I got the degree from FIDM. I went there too. Really? Nice. For the graduates. Awesome. That's why I was like, wait a minute. That sounds like a merchandising and marketing job. Yes, that's what I graduated with. Between you and Santa, I'm visiting something else, but... Yes, Santa, you can have fuck FIDM alumni. Two FIDMs in one. Actually, the first porn movie I ever saw, I ever rented by myself, Santa, and I'm ashamed to say it, is a film called Merry Xmas. Are you aware of this? Oh, that's a good one. Yes, that's a very good one. Merry Xmas is... It's Santa Claus' daughter. And I hate to tell you this, but... I hate to tell you who's in it because that really dates it, but Santa Claus' daughter comes around and fucks all these people. And she's got a... I didn't know Santa Claus had a daughter. Yeah, I didn't know that either. I didn't know either, but... Where is this daughter, huh? And she's got a little elf that's with her. So every time she's fucking a guy, it's like... And Ron Jeremy's in it the whole thing. It's just always like... He's like, fire, fire brains out, fire brains out. And then at the end, when the elf starts getting some action... So it's a little person. It's a little... No, it's a real elf. They actually got a real elf from a real elf. There was a movie called Elf with Will Ferrell, and he was full-size. No, I've never heard of it. It was just the biggest movie of 10 years ago. I'm aware of that. And so was us. No, they actually went to where they had the hobbit and got a real elf and put him in the movie. Anyway, so here's the story. So you were working as a fashion buyer. Yeah. By the way, Josie just came from the dentist, so she's all looped out from Nite Disoxide. So she's in there for... But anyway... I know. The shows are always interesting after I come back from the dentist. But here's the story. So you were working... You were working as a fashion buyer. Nice job, corporate job. You get called into the HR director's office because her son saw you on a webcam. Yes. And she was doing that on the side. And the son told his mother? See, that's what I found sketchy because whose son would tell their mother that they watched... I was informed by that. I was informed by that. I was doing a webcam show. You were doing a webcam, webcam. I was doing a webcam show. And he was like, oh, hey, mom, that's who I watch. You know, I just feel like that's kind of weird. Hi, mom. Guess who I... I think you were bluffed. Yeah, yeah. See, I don't know what happened. I don't know the backstory. Deny, deny, deny. But I just know that I went into the HR... No, actually, I knew it was a phone call and they called me down. I would have said, I feel sexually harassed by you. I think I should have my attorney talk to you because this is not true. And they gave me all these pictures of me and my webcam link. So they had, like, screenshots. Yeah, somebody sent it. Can you autograph those pictures for him? Because that'd be more something. Oh! Busted. Sign here. Yeah. This thing you call the race card. What, you're saying all us Asians look alike? That's not me. Exactly. That looks nothing like me. But now everybody has tattoos. I just thought that was kind of funny. I didn't... I don't know. I wasn't embarrassed. Do you have tattoos that identify you? No, I don't. I don't have... I'm all natural. I'm all tattoo. But maybe it's just my voice, my accent, anything. Anyway. I would say, are you saying all Asians look alike? That is not me. I am so bad. That's what I tell people sometimes. So then you're like... And then I just feel like, you know, the company and me is not a good fit because I'm more, like, very sexually open and I like to joke around and the company is very conservative. So that's when I'm like, okay, let's just go ahead. Because I wasn't even feeling embarrassed that they found it. I said, oh, wow, that's a good picture. And interestingly enough, the first... And you haven't been... You've only been doing it for a couple of years. Yeah. But, like, the first credits that come up on your IMDb page, like, Black by Cuckolding, I Love Big Toys 35 and Mandingo Massacre 5. Are you a size queen? Mm. I gotta love the big thing. But then I've read in another interview, you said, oh, I don't care about size as long as somebody knows what they're doing. See, I wouldn't want you to be, like, 12 inches because then I don't... I mean, I can't fuck you all the time. I can't fuck you all the time. Santa... Well, Santa's magic because he can come down the chimney so he can make it big and small whenever he wants. Yeah, exactly. He's got the Santa magic. As long as you know what you're doing, I'm good. You know, we have a good time. Now, I hear women say this all the time, but are there guys with big dicks that don't know what they're doing? I'm trying to figure out what... Yeah, definitely. They would just sit there and it gets boring. It gets boring. I know. It's no good, huh? It's kind of like super, super hot chicks. Like, they say a lot of the Victoria's Secret models are, like, they suck in bed. But, I mean, how bad can it be? Seriously. If you're with someone like that... Yeah, I mean, it's just... If you're with a big cock, how bad can it be? You have to know how to work it. I saw someone who was wonderful. I personally, I could get off on a Q-tip or a big cock. Sometimes you just want that to go. I mean, you know, the Q-tip, okay. Yeah, sometimes, I just like when they just grab me and fuck my throat and just really pull my hair. A lot of guys just kind of sit back when they have big cock because they know what my cock does all the way. Oh, okay, so it's like, yeah, they feel entitled, yeah. Yeah. But when you look like me, you put a lot of effort into it, and that's appreciated. I'm sure you got a big thing down there. You see? Right, Josie? She's a porn star. She knows. Anyway. Totally speechless over here. Anyway, so Santa's totally speechless. Santa, it's time. Well, there's one more story, and then we're going to get to the gifts, all right? And we're going to get to, you guys can play with Santa and do whatever you guys want. The one more story, because I thought I was horny. Josie, I'll tell you, I'm fucking horny. I read a story where you were stuck in traffic, which happens in L. A. a lot. Yeah. See, you know the story I'm talking about. Okay. Okay. Okay, listen to this. Okay, I don't know. Tell me. Tell me. Let's see. Well, if this is the story, yes, if there's another story, please tell it. You were stuck in traffic, and you were so bored stuck in traffic, you started masturbating on the freeway. A guy next to you checks you out. He's pretty cute. You tell him to pull over to the next exit, and you guys fucked? Yeah, so... That's how horny you are? Okay. I... Because, you know, waiting in traffic is, like, horrible. Was this on the 405? And I get so bored. I... Every time... And I drive a long time. So I always have these... These ring vibrators. I always have some kind of vibrator. It's really... I love this woman. I love Julie. It's really accessible. Right, right, right. No, I'm not familiar. Where do you get these ring vibrators? It's, like, from Hustler. They would give it to me... You don't own the ring vibrators? They're all over the place. Trojan makes them. You can get a target. They look like a regular ring. Yeah, yeah. They look like that. They look like a regular. They have flowers and everything, but there's a button on the side. I don't know the flowers, but, yeah. But they look like typical jewelry. Really? Yeah. Or they can have a lipstick one, or I have a gift. Did you hear that, Jenny? Jenny's hair is purple. It looks cool. Yeah, Jenny looks great. Because, I mean, you never know. I go to the airport. I'm being in a public crowd all the time. So, I don't know. I always have all kind of vibrators. Oh. And I always drive like this with my one leg up. That's just how I drive. No, seriously. I drive like that all the time. I drive like this with one leg up. It's so insane. It works. When you're in a sleigh, you're just like, yeah. Yeah. You just chill out. Okay, so you have one leg up. Yeah, and it's just so natural that me in traffic and this hand with my rings on will be down here. So, how many times does this happen where you guys... And I never wear panties. I never wear panties. I hate panties. Give me wedgies. So, I just might as well go without it. Thank you. That's true. So, yeah. Santa likes to G-string the rest of us. I understand. But, so, this happened once or how many times does this happen? This happened. Well, that... When it's... I actually have sex and that's just happened one time. But the rest, I just get a lot of honk from the truckers because they can see me, you know, and I just say hi because, I mean, I'm doing public service. Was that the story that you thought I was going to tell or is there another one? Yeah, I think that's the story. Okay. So, I... It was so fun because the guy was like, oh, you know, he gave me a signal. Oh, he was the one that he initiated it. Okay. I think we both kind of did. We're both kind of... I read... I read an interview with you at some... Yeah, I did a lot of interviews. How many movies have you done in total? About 100-something movies. That's in two years. In two years? Yeah. So, I... So, you squirt. I'm assuming because you're in a lot of squirting movies. Is that right? Yes, I was. So, you do squirt? I do. Santa, what's your opinion on squirting? What do you think about that? Would you like me to squirt on your face, Santa? Would that be your first impression? I would just be like, shh. Just say yes, Santa. Come on. Yes, I'm pro-squirting. Yes, yes. So, what was the first time you discovered that you could squirt? Oh, my God. The first time I felt like so embarrassed because I feel like I'm going to need to pee. Right. And everybody asked me and that's how I'm looking, you know, if you need to pee. And the guy would just tell me just let it go. And I was all afraid like, oh, it's your bed, everything else. Right. And he just said, just let it go. And I said, okay. So, I let it go. And it's not pee. I know. Yeah, I'm familiar. I've been with a couple squirters. Yeah. It's how I feel like. I'm serious, Chelsea. You look at me like I'm bullshitting. It's such a big orgasm. Yes, I'm aware. It's way more intense than a regular one. So, when you get a regular orgasm, you're disappointed? You just. No, no, no. I didn't. Jeez, are you crazy? I still feel good. I am crazy. But once you discover squirting, it's nice. Yeah. Yeah. It was nice. And sometimes the guys get shocked like, whoa. So, when was the, so, when was the when did the foreign producers find out that you squirted? When did they just, I mean, is that like on your resume that you put? When I realized that I could do it, but sometimes, and that's when I do with King, it was with the video for Fucking Machine and it was all over the place. Okay. Because of Fucking Machine. Well, yeah, when you were squirting, obviously it was all over the place. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it was all, the Fucking Machine just hitting me so, so deep and hard. And that's when I realized I really want to do it on King. Yeah. And you're nominated for a couple of Levy and Awards, if I recall correctly. Yes. Before we get to the Santa, so, you've been a nice girl today. You've been a good girl this year. So, you won the best threesome scene, is that correct? Yes, I got the best threesome scene nomination, two boys and one me. Oh, the two boys and one girl. The two boys and me, I love that. Very nice. Oh, really? Josie, get out. No, but. No, it's okay. More fun. Oh, so, so, do you, do you, do you, do you, do you, do you, no, no, no. I was a swinger before. I was going to ask you about that too. Are you still, are you still swinging? Yes, yes, I'm still a swinger. I gotta be honest with you. I know, I know a lot of swingers. They don't look like you. No. They're never attractive. They're never that. You know Santa's saying it's Santa's thing. What do you mean by that? They're all very sexually, at least the one I know. They're very sexual, I'll give you that. I agree. Yeah? For once, Mark and I agree. They're very sexual, but they don't look like you. That's for sure. Oh, I asked it. that's when I realized that's when I met my connection to get me into the adult industry too through swinging at the swinging party very nice so I mean that's crazy you must go to some different swinging parties you know how much I told you I love older men and usually I can find an older man respectful with their wife with no drama, I don't like dramas I just want to fuck you and I leave home don't call me, don't text me I just want to get what I want we don't have to go to dinner, romantics, anything like that I just get what I want that works for me that works for most men that's when I find swinging lifestyle is what fed me the most because so if I was to put you on Santa Claus' lap would you squirt? I don't want you to mess up the costume yeah I would squirt out over Santa's beard and on his glasses look at his glasses making spot on his glasses Santa got some gifts for you so if you want to get on his lap I'll grab the bag for you I'm going to be your helper bring that bag over here Santa's ready go ahead she's sticking her ass in his face she wants a good gift she's like make it good make it good I'm so excited now alright alright alright And I am who I am. That's why I'm in porn. Because I love sex, so. Okay, so, Cindy, open your presents. I mean, Santa got you some presents. Sorry, Santa's dick is right here. Santa's dick's right there. I can't focus. Oh, my. Santa got you a big old candy cane. A big candy cane. I'm afraid to know what she's going to do with that. Well, we'll see what happens. Santa got you some bath salts. Oh, thank you. Are you going to get in it with me, Santa? Oh, yes. And rub it all over my body. And we got some marshmallow treats. And some bubbles, too. We got some bubbles for you. Oh, bubble, bubble. If you watch my movie. Someone made it up to the 99 cents, too. If you watch my movie, you know I'm a cum bubble blower. You're a cum bubble blower. I love blowing bubbles in my movie. Oh, that was another thing. You put a thing on Facebook. I love this woman. She's fucking great. You put a thing on Facebook where it was you in the snow. And you said, who wants a cum-sicle? Or a cum-sicle. A cum-sicle. It was yesterday, yes. Has anybody really given you a cum-sicle? You know, like when they, yeah. What's that called? The cum. So, like, the cum in the ice tray and then... Wait, freeze it? What? Wow, this must be a Vietnamese thing. I thought it was a tropical climate there. Well, I always like to try something different. Sometimes I have cums in cappuccinos or coffees or something. Wow. Cumbuccinos. Cumbuccinos. Wow. In a cake. You're going a different Starbucks than I am. That's crazy. She likes the filling. Cumbuccinos. And now maybe I'll come in like... What's it called? What's it called? Candy cane. Candy cane. Yes. Candy cane. Why don't you open it? And Josie, I was... Oh, what is this then? There's a little bit of Santa to take home with you. That's a little Santa marshmallow treat. So, Josie, I forgot. Last year we were having so much fun with Simple Sex. I forgot to ask you because you were raised Jewish now, but you always celebrate Christmas. Or did you celebrate Hanukkah? No, I wasn't raised Jewish at all. Oh, okay. But you are Jewish. Both my grandparents were. We had Christmas with a Christmas tree. Okay. So you always celebrated Christmas. Yeah, I always celebrated Christmas. Oh, wait a second. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. She's got the candy cane. That's the biggest candy cane I've ever seen. I don't think you could... Yes, it does. I'm pretty sure it fit in my pussy. I don't know. If... I'm sure it would. It's not a cigar. Although, I don't know. I mean, you were with Lexi and Steele. Yeah, that was a good one. That was a bigger candy cane than that, right? I was on his show on Playboy. I was on a show on Playboy. Oh, yeah? Was it on Playboy? No, she did a movie. She did a movie. She did a movie on his show. Oh, you were on one of his movies. Yeah, it was a movie. Of course, though. She actually fucked Lexi and Steele. It was Lexi. On film. Yeah, I've heard things about him. Mandingo was my first interracial porn movie. Yeah, I remember my agent called me. He was like, can you fuck big dick? And I was like, oh, I don't know, but I could try. And you passed with flying colors. So, it was like, yay! It was actually, it was really good having Lexi so small, and his dick was way bigger than my face. Was Lexi and Steele, is he small? No, no, no. He's pretty big. He's small, and his dick was like, right. She said his dick was bigger than her face. Yeah, I would imagine, yeah. Yeah, my whole elbow. Right? This is elbow, right? Right. So, that's how it is. So. Your forearm. Right. Forearm. Forearm. Okay, yeah. Yeah. My dick's bigger than your elbow, but that's not saying much. Anyway, Josie, Josie, you gotta stay off the laugh. We'll, you guys can play a little bit later as Santa, but Josie's turned on Santa's laugh. Stay on his laugh. That's okay. Okay, Josie, are you gonna go on his laugh too? Oh, come on his laugh. Okay. Hi, Santa. Okay. Hi there, Josie. Good to see you again. I got a nice bag for you. Okay, let's see what's going on, Santa. Okay. All right. Let's see if we can get you something cool here. I'm too big for Santa's laugh. She's tiny. Oh, yeah, you can come in here. Oh, it's an all-day sucker. It's a My Little Pony sucker. Oh, how cute. Yeah. Going straight to my knees. Oh, okay. Is this a hint? Do I need to work out more? No, no. Cindy, I don't know if you're wearing Santa. Yoga pants. Josie got her class for yoga teaching license. I bet you look sexy in them. I love those. I bet so. Yoga pants are cool. I love those. Santa knew that you were going to teach yoga, so he got you some new yoga pants. You got to teach yoga? Yeah. Oh, my God. Can I just go to your class? I just beat you from the back. I'm going to teach you rock and roll yoga. Some bath salts and a loofah. Oh, my God. You couldn't resist, could you? You're such a dick. Well, you're going to Spain. I want to make sure that everything's clean and everything's... I got some Vagisil from the 99 cent store. Jeez. Because you're going to... You're going to Spain. Who knows? What's going on over there? You're going to be running with the moles? I'm not going to come back with Ebola. Are you going to fuck it? I don't think Vag... Are you going to fuck a lot of Spanish men? Yeah, Josie. I will. Yeah. Take the pictures. Thank you. Thank you, Santa. You should just wear the yoga pants. I have a present. I have presents, too. And Jenny needs to come in here because I have something for her. This was not my idea, Jenny. Jenny is our producer, and she's... We couldn't do the show without her. She's wonderful. So Jenny's going to be sitting on Santa's lap, too. Very nice. Come on, Jenny. Come on, Jenny. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Well, you already dared her to come in here. It's got to be good if she doesn't want to come in. Jenny very rarely comes in. What is it? I have no idea what it is. You got to tell the audience what this is. We're doing the show. Maybe it's one of those things you wear on a... It's a special time. Is that a ring? Is that a vibrating ring? It's a vibrator ring. Is that a vibrating ring, Josie? She knows me so well, yeah. You can masturbate in traffic now. You mean... Oh, what's a vibrating ring, Josie? Yeah, I know, right? What? You were just goofing around. Oh, what's a vibrating ring? No, I've never seen one. Oh, I gave her something. She can smoke. Oh, okay. We don't want... Yes, I understand. Uh-oh. What's going on here? I got some chocolates, some peppermint bark. So what is this here? Oh, a calendar. Now, Josie, why don't you... Oh, sweet. Josie, why don't you get on the mic and tell people what this is because... Well, this is the calendar that... Come here. Okay. I'll put it on camera. Go ahead. You tell what's going on. Hi. This calendar I'm in, it's called Tim Hunter's Honey Bunnies. And it's all... It's all pinup girls. And they're all on planes, trains, and automobiles. And my page is the month of May because that's my birthday. And I'm on this beautiful 1920, I don't know, something classic car from Creve Motors. Oh, look at that. Wow, very nice. Look at that. Sweet. Beautiful. There's me. Ah. We're doing a little bit of gaffes. Great gaffes. See? Yeah. Tim specializes in... He loves photographing beautiful women in front of mechanical stuff, airplanes, and... And you can order it. And where do we order it, Josie? Just Google Tim Hunter's Honey Bunnies and calendar. Tim Hunter's Honey Bunnies. I love Tim Hunter. We'll have him on the show. Thank you, Josie. And how long has this pissant shirt been in the closet? How long has it been in the closet? Yeah. That one is probably about 10 years old. I understand. I understand, because it's Your Best Sucks, which is one of my favorite songs. Yeah. Pissant, pissant. I didn't even see that. Cindy, pissant is Josie's old band. She was in the band Pissant. When she was on Lexican Steel Show, she was with the band Pissant. Josie's been on VH1's Rocka. Nice. What was it? It was Porn to Rock. It was Porn to Rock. We got Porn to Rock because I was on Playboy Channel, which is adult. Yeah. As is this show. Thank you so much, Josie. Opposed to actually... You didn't even have me. I've never done porn. You didn't even have me. This is it. I've done sex stuff. You can try with me. It's okay. Okay, so now... I will set up a camera. Yeah. Well, we've got a camera on you guys, so... What do you got? It's for... For Jenny? Oh, Jeremy. Okay. All right. I'm sure Jenny will make sure he gets it. So... Merry Christmas, Jeremy. Thanks for having us. Thank you, Jeremy. I want to say... Wish Merry Christmas. I got to say, I want to wish Merry Christmas to Jenny, who is always here. Mindy, you filled in every now and then. She's always here. She's fucking... She's terrific. I was going to say, she's fucking great. She's terrific. And Jeremy. And everybody here at Skid Row. Neighborhood love. Johnny Gramercy's birthday was last week, so I forgot to wish him a happy birthday last week. He has a show on 7 o'clock where he plays a lot of soul and R&B stuff. Johnny, it was his birthday last week. Ah. Happy birthday. And Nestor, who's 9 o'clock. So, now I have to ask Josie and Cindy, has Santa Claus been naughty or nice this year? He's been naughty. He's been naughty? He's been giving me kisses and touching my booty. Is that right? Yes. Have you really been doing that, Santa? Santa is touching my booty. Santa, you know what that means? That means the naughty list, I think. That means the naughty list. You know what you have to do? I do. But you know what? It was worth it. Okay. Cindy, you're going to have to get off his lap for a second. You're going to have to assume the position. What? You and Josie are going to have to... What? What? You're going to have to punish him for being naughty. Yeah. Santa? Josie? Oh, I have to spank him? It could happen. It could happen. Hands on the... Hands on the table, Santa. Table. Stand up. Yeah, stand up. Stand up. How many slaps? I have to spank Santa. I don't know. Okay, Santa. By the way, how's Santa's ass? Nice, huh? Actually, it has a great firm butt. Naughty Santa. Come on, Cindy. Go ahead. Go ahead. Santa. Thank him. That's enough. That's enough? Yeah. I don't think that's enough because I think Josie was a little naughty this year, too. Out of there. The hand hurt a little bit or what? Now, Santa and Cindy... I think she's been naughty. She's been very naughty. Have you been naughty, Cindy? No. But there is something really amazing coming out for my fans. I would love to hear about this, Cindy. Tell us about that. I can't talk about it yet. I can't talk about it yet, but it will be coming. It's a surprise for my fans. Does this have something to do with your website? Yeah, website, scenes, naughty scenes. Santa Claus scenes? Something I've never seen before. What could that be? I don't know. Give us a hint. I don't know. What body part does it involve? They can find out an AVN boot, which I will be having at AVN next month. Oh, my God. I'm sorry. Next year, next month. Are you going to have a booth at AVN? Yeah. I'm nominated. This year's in my booth is Starfall booth at AVN. Oh, okay. Starfall. Starfall. Uh-huh. Cindy, Starfall. Your English has gotten worse as the show's gone along. I know. But Starfall booth. I know. She's regressing. You should see me. She got Santa's laugh. Must have done something to you. You're regressing to childhood. What is that about? I don't know English. You're so horny. You should hear me after a game day or something. I totally don't know English. Oh, really? I just started talking in Vietnamese after a game day. I just got dick drunk or something. Oh, I was kidding. I was going to ask you. I was going to ask you because could you say something dirty in Vietnamese? Yeah. Can you say it a long time? She already did. What does that mean? If I go up to a Vietnamese girl and say that, what does that mean? It just means like, do you want to fuck me now? Okay. So you'll be seeing me down in Garden Grove there, right? Down in Garden Grove. Yeah, Garden Grove. Yes. That's where the little Saigon. That's where the little Saigon is. That's right. Santa knows every place all over the world. Garden Grove and Westminster right there. Right, right, right. Hello, Santa. Santa, where's your least favorite place to go? Bakersfield. Really? Why is that? I didn't even have to think about that, did I? That's the worst in Detroit? Oh, Detroit's got it all over Bakersfield. Really? Yeah. Detroit at least has a lake there somewhere. Bakersfield's got nothing but bad air and bad everything else. Okay. And no good restaurants in Bakersfield. Right. Not like Doobie's Home Cooking. No. Not like that. That's a great place. He ought to open up another place over there in Bakersfield. Well, I'll talk to Phil about that. Yeah, talk to him about it. What's your favorite place to go? Las Vegas. Las Vegas. Are you lucky? A lot of slutty girls there. There are a lot of slutty girls in Las Vegas. That's right. Santa gets lucky in Las Vegas. No, we already talked about it before. Jesus gets lucky with the slutty girls. Yeah, well, you know, what are you going to do? So when you stop by... Did you stop by every...