you Welcome to the Verbal Vomit Show. I'm Dave Chaos. And Dr. Rozzy is here. Hi. And Pity Anarchy. And we'll be back after the set. Tattoo, tattoo. Casino. Tattoo. Here we go again, man. Yeah. All the time. Fuck. Fuck. Yeah. Take your shoes to shit You wouldn't have been a broke lazy lying tobacco bitch I'ma tell em I don't buy drinks bitch I sell em You don't know what I know Bitch I'm so unbimpable Can't break me unbreakable You don't see what I see I guess it's just a pimp in me You ain't a shit to yourself you ain't a nobody I'm about to catch a case up in this motherfucker y'all And just get my number back a year ago dawg Westside checker I'll search you till I get ya I bet ya Pomona town westside pimpin' ass credit up We havin' things when it's nothin' to have We grabbin' things when it's nothin' to grab Fuck you stupid hoe Tell me just what you know None you lonely all your friends gone Fuck you bitch and the horse you rode in on Let me finish I think your lazy ass pussy Ran out of long distance weekend at any time in it Sugar bumpin' on y'all Tryna tell you about a bitch in your mix waitin' for somethin' to fall You need to grow up bitch you can't show a shit Your sugar freak got the chair And a motherfuckin' whip But I'm supposed to watch your ass 24 hours a month Forget about my homegirls in the studio Forget my kids and their knees and my bitches for who? For a jealous ass tired ass prostitute You ain't shit without me bitch free gon' win Cause I'll beat your ass and I'll do it again You must be lookin' for a motherfuckin' flaw I'm sugar free bitch I'll suck you in your motherfuckin' jaw I'm the boss I'm the leader bitch I run this shit Just don't forget who's runnin' things and I won't bust your lip Now Pimpin' goin' on Now You don't know what I know No you don't Now Bitch I'm so un-pimpable Can't bring me unbreakable You don't see what I see Uh uh uh uh I guess it's just a pimp in me You ain't the shit to yourself you ain't to nobody else Bitch I'm a pimpin' ass maniac Spouse of youth, wife beater, lunatic, predator Macaroni mind reader, good judgment, a character, gentleman of leisure Fucker, squeezer, teaser, pimpin' her back Slap her with a dick, slap her with a dick Slap her with a dick, slap her with a dick Now put a dick in her ear, a dick in her ear Put a dick in her ear, a dick in her ear Now blind the bitch, blind the bitch Blind the bitch, blind the bitch Now lie to her ass before she lie to you Just don't forget to knock her teeth out of her mouth before she do it Now remind me to whoop your ass Remind me to whoop your ass Bitch gon' get me something to beat you with I know you crafty but you ain't puttin' me through shit Take some money from me bitch, sugar free ain't shit Fuck around a week later, can't find the bitch She out of pocket, yeah I know the shit she done to your ass That's why I'ma knock her ass out right in front of your ass I'm sugar free to pimp a Mona style bangin' on your cubs I'm the boss of that city, what you thought this was? You got brov on, fuck around and get stole on Ride with me, you'll get rolled on So if you see my hoe actin' out of order I know you want reporter, that's why I'm about to floor Go do your nails bitch, your cuticle's dead Now, now, something happened to one hair on my beautiful head Now you don't know what I know No you don't, yeah Bitch I'm so un-pimp-able Can't break me, unbreakable You don't see what I see Uh-uh, uh-uh I guess it's just a pimp in me You ain't the shit to yourself, you ain't to nobody else You don't know what I know Bitch I'm so un-pimp-able And you don't see what I see I guess it's just a pimp in me Pimp in me, pimp in me I guess it's just a pimp in me You don't know what I know Bitch I'm so un-pimp-able You ain't been where I've been Around the world and back again You don't pop your collar, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man You don't stack no dollars, man Hit it! It was me and the posse with bunny feet We were cruising in the Jags or the Lamborghinis When lo and behold, there appeared a mirage He was hooking up a car In his daddy's garage We stopped short, did a double-take He was looking so fly I thought I wasn't awake He was obviously hooking up face I assumed But then he turned the little button And the car went boom We like the cars The cars that go boom We're Tigra and Bunny And we like the boom We like the cars The cars that go boom We like the cars We like the cars We like the cars We're Tigra and Bunny and we like the boom. We like them short and we like them tall. We like them one and we like them all. They're always adding speakers when they find the room. Cause they know we love the guys with the cars that go boom. And see my boyfriend really knows where it's at. He's got 50 inch wolfers all along the back. He makes a comment on going to my room. But I'd rather stay out with his car that goes boom. We like the cars, the cars that go boom. We're Tigra and Bunny and we like the boom. We like the cars, the cars that go boom. We're Tigra and Bunny and we like the boom. Now if your car ain't got it, go out and get it. We like the boom and don't you forget it. So turn down the treble and flaunt your bass. So your car could be heard almost any place. Cause when you're in the street, you can't go. Far without hearing the boom pouring out your car. So if your speaker's weak, then please turn it off. Cause we like the cars that sound so tough. We like the cars, the cars that go boom. We're Tigra and Bunny and we like the boom. We like the cars, the cars that go boom. We're Tigra and Bunny and we like the boom. Everybody just be. Your horn, if you hear us, it's the Z-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er- You know, I don't understand why everyone keeps calling us sluts. Me neither. I'm a good girl. Yeah, me too. Hell, I just went to church the other day. Here's a story about the boys at the altar. Some of them got between me and my hunter. But I don't think the good Lord wouldn't mind. I was calling his name the whole time. Sometimes I get a little drunk and I go home with some crazy puns. But don't judge me by what I do. Cause baby, you know I want to hit it too. Shit, you know they all want to hit it. Yeah, they're just talking shit cause they want it. But I don't think they want to hit it. Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh. Shut up. You know, maybe it's these outfits we wear. I mean, I can see your boobies. Shit, my stylist is on a budget. He's just trying to save some fabric. It really doesn't matter. I'm just going to end up taking it off anyway. So what if I'm a little newbie? It don't mean you're going to get some booty. Baby, I just want to shake it. It took more than nine months to make it. Dude, they fit just right. They squeeze my coochie really tight. So that when I shake and dance, there's a party in my pants. Shit, I like your Daisy Dukes. I think they're real classy. Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh. Shut up. Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh. Shut up. Do I look like a slut? Is it the way I move my butt? Is it the way my clothes are cut? I like to do it. And what? Do I look like a slut? Is it the way I move my butt? Is it how my clothes are cut? I don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck. I saw Mikey on the street yesterday. And do you know what he called me? What? He called me a slut. No. Yeah. Honey, don't worry. He's just a faggot. It's not a faggot. It's a faggot. It's a faggot. It's a faggot. It's a faggot. It's a faggot. a slut. No. Yeah. Honey, don't worry. He's just a fag anyway. I'm not a fucking slut, you fucking cocksucker. Your mom's the one letting everyone fuck her. Everybody knows she's a fucking hoe. Sucks dick on the cone for a little blow. Just because I like to freak out each and every night of the week. Don't mean I can't resist temptation. Hell, I don't give a damn about my reputation. Shit, you know I look great. A hot joy sweet baby. This is one classy ass. Do I look like a slut? Is it the way I move my butt? Is it the way my clothes are cut? I like to do it. And what? Do I look like a slut? Is it the way I move my butt? Is it how my clothes are cut? I don't give a fuck. Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh. Shut up. Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh. Shut up. Uh-huh. Shut up. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh Shut up Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh Shut up Do I look like a slut? Uh-huh Shut up I can't believe she'd get off talking shit like that. I mean, she's one to talk. At least we don't let just anyone stick it in. What a fucking slut. Slut. Well, we're back. Go ahead, Kitty, why don't you announce the songs we just played? They'll be online, but I'll announce them right here. Anyways. Children, children. I don't know what the intro is, but when the song started playing, I think those were all my picks. It's So Unpimpable by Sugar Freeze from P-Town, not La Puente, but Pomona. Bless the Mic by Visionaries. We Like the Cars That Go Boom, La Trim. Not like everyone else thinks that it's... Who sings that one song? Well, it's because when you... No, no, no. What song? Who sings that one song that's all like... Yeah, yeah, that's it, that's it. That is not Salt-N-Pepa Push It. Salt-N-Pepa Push It. That is not Salt-N-Pepa Push It. Wait, which one? That's Super Sonic. Sorry, Super Sonic. Super Sonic. Who sings that? By J.J. Fatt. Okay, it's not J.J. Fatt. Everyone thinks that freaking We Like the Cars That Go Boom is J.J. Fatt. It is not J.J. Fatt. It's La Trim. Okay, and the last one is Slut. Do I look like a slut? Yeah. For those that know what I look like. To make your own judgment. But that's by The Queens, Avenue D. That unfortunately retired. I know. I tried to go see them at a... They were doing a DJ set in Riverside. When? Oh my God. No, this was like a couple years ago. And it didn't work out too good because I even changed it to my costume. And it was like a little costume, so it was all cold. But it was all outside. And we just couldn't wait. I just wanted to leave and we never get to see them. Boo, I saw them a couple times before they retired. I saw them at the... What is it called? It used to be the Hollywood Athletic Club. And then I saw them also at Little Pedro's, which is like around here somewhere. Oh, yeah, which is on First Street. It's Little Pedro's, but now it's called Wardello. Wardello Bar, now it's called something else. Oh, really? They keep changing the name of that club all the time. But it's still Little Pedro's on the outside. Okay, crazy. I saw them there. They were crazy when they were pumping people's boys' faces and all that stuff. Crazy, man. You know what's funny about Sugar Free? I remember him. He used to sell his demo CDs at the Plenty Hills Mall. He'd go walking in there and be like, hey, you want to buy a CD? Hey, you want to buy a CD? He's done. My name's Sugar Free. And back then, he was up and coming. And then all of a sudden, he's like, hey. You don't say, because he was selling tapes at Plenty Hills Mall. He was selling CDs. That could have been the first. Oh, I'm sorry. CDs at Plenty Hills Mall. He was moving on up back then. Well, that's what the girls from Avenue D used to do. We used to have to follow them around the club and be like, hey, hey, can we get a CD? And then they'd kiss it for us. That makes it just more special. She's like, wait, wait, wait. And then she'd put it on. And it was actual bootleg CDs. It was actual burnt CDs. Oh, cool. Well, that's how most bands do it in the beginning. They'll burn it themselves, and then eventually they'll be on a label, and they'll reissue that shit out. So everybody apparently survived the biggest event this past weekend, which was fucking. Karma getting, which is an absolute waste of fucking time. An absolute waste of time. It really was. They pumped it up. I mean, I understand that they needed to work on the freeway. Fine. But to pump it up the way they did, to have everybody just all of a sudden, you know, put the instill the fear in God that if everybody moves, all of a sudden there's going to be massive gridlock everywhere. That's just ridiculous. They did the same thing back in 1984 with the Olympics. They said that L.A. wouldn't want to be able to. They didn't want to handle the Olympics because of all the traffic, from everybody coming in from the international waters to the U.S. You know, the streets would be clogged. You know what happened back in 84? Absolutely nothing. Streets were flowing just fine. Hello, what happened in 99? What happened in 99? Oh, with KY. KY Jelly? No, Y2K. Sorry, I'm Dr. Rozzy, and all I have is sex on the brain. But what is it? Y2K. There we go. Oh, that Y2K, that was another championship. Or just like the Rapture back in May. I know. So we're still here. 10 years in the making. 10 years in the making. And I believe. Our 12, what is it, 12, 21, 12? Oh, next year. That's another one. 2012. That's going to come and go. It's going to be another day. 21, 12 would give us like another 100 years. 12, December 21, 12. 12, 21, 12? 12, 21, 12. December 21st of 2012. Oh, okay. That would be the last day. I'm a doctor. I know what I'm talking about. Oh, my God. Well, I'm not. So I just know. We discussed that a couple minutes ago. Just because we're average. I know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Doesn't mean we're not. This is educating you guys. We're all going to die. Doesn't matter. We're all the same in the beginning and in the end. Dust to dust. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. Don't leave. Don't let boys between your bust. No? You never heard that? I thought you were going to say dust in the wind. Bacon and bacon. Eggs and eggs. Don't let boys between your legs. No. No? Okay. Yo no. Yo no sé cosas pervertidas. Ay, no sé. I don't know perverted things. That's Nancy that knows the perverted things. And I just do sexual. I'm calling bullshit on that because I hear your show on Sunday. I am here to do sexual health. Nancy is the pervert. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I dare her to call in and debate me on that one. Yes, Nancy, call in, please. I want to hear this debate. It's a dare from Dr. Rozzy. You can call in at 1-800-893-9562. She won't take my dare. I know her. Give us a call. Give her a bait. Give her some bait. If she calls in, what? What do you see? If she doesn't call in, you can't call in. I'll be on house arrest on Friday. I'll be on house arrest on Friday. Yes. Why do you have to be on pussy probation? Oh, yeah. Why does she have to be the one that suffers? Because I can take her out. Because you can take her out? Hey, she's my pimp, so she can do whatever she wants. Hey, aren't you going out with novice Nancy on Friday, right? That is if she calls in, I guess, because now that's... Yep, that's the challenge. That's up for debate nowadays now. That's the challenge. Well, let's see. We survived Carmageddon. And last week, Jeremy, was down with the strep throat. I just got to ask you real quick, Jeremy. Did the Mormons, did they come in and bathe you and take care of you like they said they were on their post? Weren't they going to bring you like virgins to come and heal you and stuff? Like all kinds of stuff. No, I got none of that. Oh, my God. Follows advertising. Don't believe it. But you still listen to their show on Thursdays. They're still up and coming. But, yeah, Jeremy, you're doing a lot better. Selling CDs and... Yeah, yeah. You know, strep throat. I was down. Well, so did you hear what happened? Last Thursday during the infamous, quote, unquote, art walk? Oh, yeah, the baby. About the baby who died, who was two months old. Yeah. No, the rumor was that he died. He did not die. He was in intensive care. No, he... He eventually died? He eventually died. And the mom was in intensive care, too. Did she die, too? No, no, no. What happened was... Yes, yes. I saw it. I read the story. What happened was a guy was backing in and he was pulling forward and he hit the stroller. No, two cars were going to crash and one came in. Oh, we have a call. And went on to... Who is it? Who is this on Verbal Vomit? Hello, you're on... It's Nancy. Oh, she called in. And all I have to say is challenge accepted. You're my friend. Dun, dun, dun. Oh, well, actually, I was just telling Dr. Rossi that Hustler's having, like, you get something for free if you spend I don't know what, but she said not to go to Hustler. I didn't say don't go to Hustler. It's just Hustler... Is it overpriced? It's one, it's overpriced. It's super overpriced. Right. And another thing, it's the name. It's Hustler. You got to support... You got to support Levy Flint's wheelchair habit. You have, like, a... You get, like, a Hustler bag for your toys or something if you buy something over, like, something dollars. But that's great, but it's kind of like saying, oh, here, you're going to pay this for the name. Do you know where you're going to get a better product? Do you know where you're going to take me yet? Now, have you... Nancy. What do you think is better, Hustler or Pleasure Chest? Oh, okay, sorry. Totally getting distracted. I was having my pozole, drinking my 7-Up, and then all of a sudden, I get pulled in. Wait, what was the question? You liked getting sucked in. Or pulled out. Pulled, sucked. Eaten. Yeah. I like that one. Scratched. Yeah, I like that on my back. Which one? Taking notes, Nancy. Are you taking notes? Let me take notes. Scratched. Scratched on back. Scratched on back. Eating out. Eating out. Why did that sound electronic? The aliens are coming. Oh, my God. Ew. Did you hear that? Yeah. It's just me. Eating out. Oh, my goodness. I needed to bend myself. I was called a pervert, and I refute that comment. Okay, Nancy. I am giving you the floor to say what you got to say about you not being a pervert. Go ahead. Go. Thanks. Thank you so much. Okay, so here's my thing. Everyone should be able to be open about their sexuality and the things that they're into. Should that make them a pervert? No. That makes me just as normal. As the lady next door that's probably praying the rosary because I'm standing in front of my door in my underwear, and that doesn't make me a pervert. That doesn't make me any different than her. Maybe my spirituality centers around being sexual. Is it because you're more sexually open? It does. Venus was a god. What was that? Venus was a god. Is it because you're more sexually open than, per se, your neighbor? Not necessarily. I don't think that that makes me a pervert. No, no. I'm not saying you're a pervert. No, no. I'm not saying you're... No. I'm agreeing with you. I don't think you're a pervert. I listen to your show, by the way, and I think it's the doc that's the perv. How dare you? I think so, too. I mean, if you guys didn't listen to the show this past Sunday, you need to listen to it or download it because Dr. Ross was so hard trying to get those pics of Nancy's boobs. Exactly. But you know what? It worked. Oh, God. The fucking lawyer. But it worked because I went to FetLife and I saw him. Right? Her number one... She does. She has nice boobs. You have a nice rack. I'm sorry. She does pride herself in her boobs. She does pride herself in her boobs, you know? And I was like, if you love her so much, flaunt them. So, you know? She did? And I just like calling her a perv because I know it gets her crotchless panties all in the red, so... Does she turn on her butterfly? Yeah. No, her vibrating egg. The bullet? Yeah. Yeah. No, I think she said it was an egg. It's an egg? Yeah, the remote control egg. Yeah. I have heard about that before. One of my friends actually owns one. And she's... Sure, friend. Her and her boyfriend when... Intimate. Intimate. Or when they're just like fucking around like in the house. It's a normal Saturday and ain't doing shit. He has a remote control. She has it on her. Okay. And all of a sudden, there it goes. Let the games begin. So, you should come on the love drive. I should what? I should what? Come? You're going to come all the way. Oh, please. Yes. Oh, no. Don't worry. That'll happen. And you'll come on the show. Oh, actually, should we talk to Nancy about what we were talking about before? Yes. We have a challenge for Kitty. We have an idea for you guys' show, but that's up to you guys. I know. Well, that's why I have both you guys here. And that's why we're talking. Because you know how we were talking about like going... You know what happened to my first vibrator? She broke it. It broke it before I even got inserted or anything. Or even touched my... How did you break your vibrator? How did you break it before you used it? I think in the frustration. The built up tension. Yes. I need to do this. And it broke. It fucking broke. Okay. Because I... Yeah. Like I said, I've never had one. So, I guess it had some kind of sleeve on it. I just... I couldn't like put the batteries in. So, I got a screwdriver and took off the... Some kind of little screw it had on. And then it led to like nothing. So, then I put it on. And then like I finally like unsheathed it and found the battery thing. And put the battery in. And by that time it was... It was just done. No refunds. No. Where did you buy this? Where did you buy the vibrator at? I don't know. My friend took me to this place that sold magazines and toys. And it was run by men. By men. So, if you heard our show on Sunday, it probably wasn't something that was fit for you. It was something that was... I never got that far. Conducing for you. Yeah. See. But maybe the universe was saying that's not the... You need to come to Dr. Rozzy and Nancy and they'll hook you up. So, getting to that... Can you guys take pictures of her buying a new vibrator so we can put it up on the Verbal Vomit site? We haven't put up anything on Verbal Vomit. We always make all these promises that we're going to put all this shit up. I'd rather not promise. It's like the song you like. Unless it's not going to come. Promises, promises. We're going to do field research. Field research? So, we were talking about... We were talking about... We were talking about... We were talking about... Maybe that could be a segment on you guys' show. Possibly if just my adventures of trying to find and what works and what doesn't and what I think of different stuff. What are you going to name the segment? What sexually gratifies Kitty? The Adventures of Making Kitty Purr. Oh, wow. A purr. I love the name. I love the name. I love the name. I love the name. I love the name. I love the name. I love the name. I love the name. I love the name. Well, I mean, we all know I'm going to make you purr, but I guess the point would be to find a vibrator that makes you purr. Okay. And then I don't know if I was just high or if this is like a viable idea because I had heard that there's a Japanese game show that people go on there actually and perform cunnilingus. Cunnilingus. Cunnilingus on the girls. If you're going to do it, say it right. Cunnilingus. And they have a contest and I guess they judge on who... Who does it better. I don't know if the girl's like blindfolded and maybe it could be like one could be a girl and one could be a boy. First, why isn't this... Why is this a competition in Japan? Why should... Why isn't this a competition in America? Because Japan is more open. We're lame. Japan is definitely way more open. I've noticed Asian countries and South American countries and Europe, they're more liberal with the sexuality, with stuff like that. They definitely are. They definitely are. Like I know that we were... I remember as a kid when we first got out, we had satellite and I remember we used to get the South American channels and those Brazilian... The Brazilian channels were great. Oh, I remember it was like on the Simpsons left. I would literally like toss off to those shows because they were like... Literally? Literally. Toss off to those shows because they were so great. You know, because naked women. A lot of... Yeah. That was a big deal because like Shusha. You know? Shusha. No, but that was a little kid's show, but the novellas were like hardcore because it was boobies. When they show Brazilian novellas on Mexican channels, they blur out stuff because when it comes to their sex scenes, it isn't like censored over there. But over here, of course, everything is. So do you accept the challenge, Kitty? Well... Nancy has set the challenge of making you per. Wait, I'm so confused now because I feel like we're talking about so many different things at once. So, okay. Yeah, I'm not confused. That's pretty much what the show is. Nice point. Nice point. There went the disorganization. There it went. There it went. So, bottom line is your goal or your mission is to make Kitty per and are you up to that challenge? Oh, oh, oh. That challenge was accepted long ago. Okay. Long, long ago. And you call that a challenge? I didn't. Whatever. I would call it a challenge. But what about the... That's Nancy. Nancy's like... Exploration of the violence. I got this. I got this. I got this. Exploration of the vibe. Exploring the vibe. Wait, what? Exploring the vibe. You guys are... Oh, she's documenting... You guys got to stop talking about it and start... Documenting the adventures of... I don't know if I want to do that. ...Kitties buying and trying... Well, just throwing all the ideas out there. We'll see what happens. I mean, you guys can go vibrator shopping, dildo shopping, you know. Get a gigantic black dildo is what I recommend. Oh, gross. Okay. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. Get a gigantic black dildo is what I recommend. Oh, gross. Okay. That is the one that... Okay, Jeremy's not coming with us. Big rubber fist. Uh-uh. He's not coming with us. Big rubber fist. How did it go from a vibrator to fisting? Because of germs? Big rubber fist. Because of big rubber fist behind us. They have those germs if you... I guess we can pick you one up on the way. Yeah. We have to get him the anal training kit. There you go. Oh, no. Wow, they just volunteered you. A training kit. Yeah. An anal training kit. Mm-hmm. They have a... Yeah. It has beads and all kinds of... If you're trying something new, I think Jeremy should try something new. Yeah. We have the feminine side and now we need the masculine side. Yin and yang. Yes. We got to balance this feng shui. Feng shui. I need to train my anus. Who? Yes. Train that ass. Me? Spread those cheeks germs. It won't be the last time we hear that. He might enjoy it. Okay. Okay. We had this conversation on Sunday. Never say never because you're guaranteeing that it's going to happen. Dun, dun, dun. In that case, may I never... No, I'm just kidding. May I never, ever, ever sit on someone's face? May never, never, never I sit on someone's face? Twice. Many times. May I never, ever, ever sit on... What's your vibrating machine, Jeremy, that you're going to get? Oh, the Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. Sibian. It's like a gigantor. I thought you guys were going to say Sibian. It's working pretty good. It's like that. It turns into nothing. Hey, what's the show all about tonight? All kinds of things. Yeah, it starts out with Carmageddon and we ended up with... It's the crossover. Vomit. There's a whole bunch of different kinds of stuff inside the Vomit room. It's a lot of different tongues that make up the Vomit. It's Vomit. It's Vomit. It's Vomit. It's Vomit. It's Vomit. It's Vomit. For people who are asking what verbal vomit is all about, you just got the description right now. There it is. So stop fucking asking me what verbal vomit is all about. Who's asking you? There's a little piece of broccoli in it. They may ask you, you're not there. Yeah. The world doesn't revolve around you. Okay, Dr. Rossi, you're not the son. There's a meatball in there. I'm not the what? I'm the son. You're not the son. A piece of rice, some corn. Nancy may tell you. Well, I will say this, though. I'm the son. Okay. Who's the moon? I don't know. Sammy's my moon. Son and moon. Son and moon. I fly away into the sunshine. Y'all give me a sugar coma with that. For a guy that's so sweet, I'm going to die of diabetes soon. You're my cutie cutie cupcake. The apple of my eye. I don't know how I got it. Oh, my goodness. So, are we on? Thank you for calling Nancy. We're on for Friday, then. I appreciate it. Yeah, I'm going to go back to my pozole, and I will text you, Kitty. And your seven up. Oh, I know my seven up. With fucking Captain America on the side of it. What the fuck, man? That took me by surprise. Nancy, tell your BFF I said hello, okay? Before you leave, Nancy, I just got to, since I have both you gals on the line, I just want to say your show, by far, is a great show. Thank you. It's like the female version of me. It's like the female version of Dan Savage. I don't know if you guys know who Dan Savage is. Yes. Oh, yes. I love Dan Savage. I'm like a huge Dan Savage fan, because that dude will talk about anything. And you guys talk about anything, too, and I like that. You guys are, it's that freedom. Oh, my God. You guys are answering, you guys bring me into a new world of, like, sexual freedom, where I can just picture it in my head. And, like, that checklist that you guys have up is really nice. Oh, cool. Thank you. It's really helpful. I don't know if I'll ever use it, because I'm not into that, but maybe one day I will be. Who knows? And I'll have a checklist with me. That's the best compliment I think ever. Wow. You just made Nancy blush. But the thing is, like, we put on... Did I make your breasts blush, though? I'm sure they flushed. They may not have blushed, but they're flushed. Stop putting me on blast, bitch. Just because I know you, okay? No, but just because, I know Nancy did a great job of putting those checklists up there, but if you're ever interested in anything and you search it, there'll be other checklists out there that you're probably into. Yeah, because, you know, I'm into, like, a lot of things, but it's hard to find somebody who's into what I'm into. Mm-hmm. You know, like, I'm into... There's probably someone else. Like, I'm into water sports, and it's very hard for me to find somebody who's into water sports. I mean, I've tried the Adult Finder route, the Craigslist route, like, the other routes. Have you tried FetLife? No, I haven't tried that, you know. Well, you've already checked out Nancy's boobs. Well, how about you go on FetLife? Why don't you just... Exactly. Thank you. You put yours right out of my mouth. I have an account now, so I might as well start using it, right? Yeah, why don't you add us? We're a big old family now. Uh-huh. Because, you know, it doesn't... So, you saw her boobs. Now, you got to show us some of yours. Yeah, it's only even. I'll show you my boobs. Oh, he flashed me. He flashed me. I saw his boobs. You saw my boobs. I saw his boobs. And you know what's funny? One areola's bigger than the other. Oh, damn. Look at that. Oh, that's right. I noticed that last night when I was... And they're different colors. Yes, they're different colors. They're different colors. I saw his boobs. I need to find somebody who's into man boobs, because I think... I think there's... There's chicks out there who are into man boobs. I mean... I have them. I might as well use them. Ask that question. Ask a female question. If you got them, find them. Exactly. And ask, who's into boobs? You will get a response. This is why this is the summer I'm going to go braless. That's it. Go braless. Burn your bra, dude. I'm going to burn my bra. Burn your bra. You're going to burn your bro? Yeah, burn my bro. All righty then, Nancy. Go back to your dinner. Tell your BFF I said hello. Thanks for calling in, Nancy. Okay, see you Friday. Wait. I'm so... I don't even know... Okay. All right. Anyways. All right. Bye. I'll text you what I meant. Okay, bye. Okay, thanks. Bye. Well, we got a lot... Yay. You got a lot taken care of then for Friday. You guys are on like Donkey Kong, and that's awesome. So, I can't wait. Okay, no. No, getting back to that... No, getting back to that sad story of that kid dying. My thing is, why the fuck are you taking a two-month-old out at 9 o'clock at night? Because you got to be cool. No, fuck that shit. You're a parent. Be fucking responsible. Wait, hold on. Hold on. Yeah, she was like... She was two months old, 57 days. And they were taking her out... They took her out for an art walk, and the baby died. It's like... Art walk to me is nothing but an excuse for hipsters to get out there and get drunk. That's all it is. Are you sure, though, that they were out there for art walk? I looked at the picture of the dude. Yeah, he was out there for art walk. What dude? The father. Because I walked by where it happened like the next night, and they were having like a candlelight visual kind of thing. Yeah, the guy's Mexican, so of course we're going to have that. Yeah. Yeah. Mexican hipster? But that's the reason why I said that is because I knew that they were Mexican, and the majority of the people at art walk, honestly, are like rich white kids. I'll tell you why he's a hipster, because he's from Montebello. Enough said. Okay. Enough said. Anybody who was in Montebello listens to Morrissey, and they're into all that stuff. You know, but... You know, regardless... Do they hang out at the Venice Room? Because... Probably. I like that place. Well... Point being, if you're going to be a responsible parent, that's fine. Find a babysitter. You know, you don't need to be taking your two-month-old out to art walk, and look what happened. Tragedy. You know, do I feel bad for the kid because the kid died? Do I feel bad for the parents now? Because they're idiots. You know, they should know better. But people take their babies to freaking movies, and there should not be in movies either. Yeah. You know, there's a restaurant, and I think it's in New York. That they're banned? Yeah, in Pennsylvania, where they're banning kids. Oh my God. Six and under. But now they're... They're probably... They're protesting against it. No, it's a... There's churches here where kids are banned. They have that little room behind the glass, and like, take your kids over there. It's not taking away anybody's freedom of rights, because it's a business, and they're there to make money. Just like with the church. It's a business. They're there to make money. Those parents that got kicked off of the airplane because their baby wouldn't shut the door up. I'm sorry, but on my flight back from Europe, and that kid's screaming. That's what I'm saying. Like, they sued and all this. Yeah, they should be... That's bullshit, dude. Like, or a baby flight. Freaking put them all freaking somewhere else. Well, baby sectioners, I mean, they shouldn't be traveling. I mean, a kid should not be traveling like that, you know, until they're old enough to understand and comprehend. I mean, it's understandable. If you're going to go to... If it's an emergency. It's understandable. But I don't want my dining experience to be ruined by screaming kids. And I have screaming kids, you know, and I know better. I know better not to take them to a fucking... To a nice restaurant. Like, I'll take them to Olive Garden. They can throw a fissy fit there. I don't give a shit. Because that's shit food. But if I'm going to go somewhere where I'm going to, you know, put some money down and it's a nice ambience, I'm not going to take my kids, you know? I don't want my Taco Bell meal disturbed, okay? Exactly. Yeah. Like, if you're a Taco Bell, fuck it. All bets are off. Because, you know... They should divide the world into, like, the half with people with kids and the half for the... Babies. And half for the normal of us that just likes to... That's not fair, though. Because when I start procreating... Then you have to move on the other side. Then you have to go on the other side. Yeah, you have to go on the other side. Right now, I'm on the non-breeder side. Yeah. No breeding. Yeah. It's a rate... You can go to your rated G world once you have your... See, I'm on the... And then I was... My ADHD kicked in and we went from babies to Morrissey to Montebello back to baby killing. Morrissey. That's verbal vomit. Morrissey wasn't... Morrissey? We talked about Morrissey. Yeah, because Morrisseybello. Montebello. Because a lot of Morrissey fans are from Montebello. Oh, like... Los Angeles. Did anyone get that? Like, Los Angeles. Los Angeles. But I kept it in the background. I kept it in the back of my head and I was like, how did baby killing go from Morrissey to... Okay, I get it now. Well, either way. Now, with that being taken, okay, you guys obviously have parents. Do you guys get along with your parents? I do. All right. Would your parents let you have a party if you wanted to? Kitty? No. Okay. Would you go to the extent of killing your parents for a party? Oh, I heard about this. Well, apparently some kid in Miami, Florida... I would if I was... What is it? The millennial? The Melendez Brothers. The Melendez Brothers? Melendez Brothers. Well, they did it for the money. They did it for the money. This kid, he was a 17-year-old from Miami, Florida. I guess he asked his parents if he could have a party. They said no. So what he ended up doing was he posted it up on Facebook. And he invited like 40 to 60 kids to come over. Before they came over, he decided to bash their heads in with a hammer. And drag the bodies into their room. Cover them up with paper, files, blankets, towels. And just... How old was he? He was 17. And they put the hammer right in between them. And just locked the parents' door. So it was nothing out of the ordinary. The only reason why the cops actually looked around was because they got a disturbing the peace call when the party was breaking up. And then somebody had to call for a welfare check. Because they were concerned. Like, where's this guy's parents at? Why is this party going on so late? So when they did the welfare check, they found the parents deceased. Apparently his motive... I mean, they don't really give the exact motive of why he did it. They don't know that yet. There must have been some party for him. To do, like, life now. To fucking kill his kid. It must have been one hell of a fucking party. I mean, there must have been, like, shut loads of ecstasy, cocaine, marijuana, alcohol. Wait. Ecstasy is a happy drug. Ecstasy doesn't make you kill people. He used to be an under-depressant. But was this kid, like, fucked up? I think he was fucked up. I don't think he has to do it with a party. You know, quite possibly. That is my analysis, Dr. Rozzy. Well, obviously he was fucked up. I mean, what he did is a fucked up thing. But, like, did he show remorse? No. He was just like, oh, yeah. That's his social personality. I wanted to have a party. That's crazy. Did he have any pets? Or were they all dead already? That right there is access to stuff. So there's other stuff going on. Access to from the five axial diagnosis. Yeah, in order to be diagnosed with a psychological disorder, there's five axes of disorder. What are the five? Access one, access two, access three, access four, access five. Okay, but can you give me, like, access? Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Access one. Like your anxiety, depression, things like that. That's like on the low end. No, no, no. It's not. Don't jump to access five. Okay, access one. Hold on. Access one just basically says what kind of disorder it is. Access one, treatable. Access two, personality disorders. Personality disorders. No minors can be on the. And mental retardation. So minors can be on access two. Bam. No personality on the adult because your personality. Personality. That's a development. Yeah. Access three is medical condition. Access four is your environment. Access five is your assessment scale. Like how. Global assessment of functioning. So basically. How good. You can have bipolar with like 50 GAF or you can have bipolar with like an 85 GAF. Just depends how well they're functioning in every day. A GAF is functioning. And what the functioning is, is the higher your score. The better. So you can be bipolar. Zero to 100. Zero to 100. And you can be like, let's say bipolar. If you're like 45, less than 50 or below. If you're less than 50. You usually need hospitalization. Yeah. You need ongoing treatment. Above 50, you can probably be discharged on your own. Everything you're doing fine. Like 50 to like 75, you still need some kind of services. But it's not where you need services like on a weekly. You could probably have like case management. Yeah. But services. Check-ins. Check-ins. Things like that. With that being said, has psychology gone to the point to where if my, hypothetically, if my kid was like, let's say acting up and I just like took him to the doctor, would it be diagnosis disorder or is it just like growing pains as a kid growing up? I mean, how do you discern between the both? It depends on the functional impairments. Okay. The severity of the disorders and if it's getting in the way of your life. That's how I've always explained it to the clients also. It's just like, okay, everyone, because I believe everyone can be diagnosed. It's just how high your gap is, how high your functioning is. So if you have, let's just keep going with the bipolar thing. If you have bipolar and you're on your meds and you're doing this and this and this and that, you may not, if that's working for you, then go for it. Because some people will be like, well, I don't need it. Okay, fine. Like, how are your relationships with others? If they're fine, you have a job, you have this and this and that. Then, yeah, no. But if your symptoms are getting in the way of your functioning, of getting a job or keeping a job or keeping a relationship or doing things that you want to do, then it's kind of like, well, what needs to happen for that to happen? So in what you do in your field as a doctor, do you find more people are self-medicating themselves with illicit drugs or are they actually on the drugs that they're being prescribed? Both. I think it's a combination of both. Do you think it makes it potentially worse? I think, yeah, definitely. Because if you're not following what your psychiatrist is telling you or hopefully you're with your psychiatrist and not just a general physician, then there shouldn't be a problem. Nurse practitioners can prescribe too, right? No. Yeah, but I, and I'm not saying that that's bad, but a psychiatrist has the training in psychotropic medication. And if the nurse practitioner has training in psychotropic medication, then okay. And that's all the psychiatric medication. Do you, as in the field that you're in, do you constantly get barraged with new products of antidepressants, anti-anxiety drugs? Do you get a lot of those pamphlets and tell me, well, this is the one that's going to be the one that works? Or how do you, I mean, how do you figure out what's going to work for them medically? For us, no, because we don't prescribe. So that's the good thing. The psychiatrist always deals with that. Okay. So, but we have to be in... Can you make a recommendation like to the psychiatrist? No. No. Well, we could if we wanted to, but he's going to be like... Off the record. Yeah. He's going to be like, yeah, right. It's kind of like us going to our physicians and saying, hey, can you give me blah, blah, blah for something? And keep in mind that a psychiatrist is a doctor with a specialty. So just think about like when you talk to your doctor, do you say like, hey, I think this and that, do this. And they're like, anyway, so what's your symptoms? Like... My psychiatrist that I work with, he's a great psychiatrist. He's a great psychiatrist. He's a great psychiatrist. Yeah. He's a great psychiatrist. He's a great psychiatrist. He's a psychiatrist. He's actually one that asks for my opinion. What do you think? What do you think this is? Do you think we should medicate him? Other people know the client better. But there's other like... Funny one here. At other places where I used to work, where it was just, oh no, this kid doesn't have anything. I would see stuff. I would have thought between a psychiatrist and the psychologist that's treating the... That's with the same patient, there would be some type of dialogue between the doctor and the therapist about how... Recommendations and stuff like that. No, because... Well, there should be. Because there should be. A lot of things should be, but they're not. When I was being treated for depression or ADHD, as they called it for me, the doctor, the psychiatrist I saw and the therapist I saw, they were in the same building, they were in the same office and they would communicate with each other because my doctor, my psychiatrist would tell me, oh, well, this is what your therapist told me and this is what we talked off the record. This is what he recommended, but these are my recommendations. I'm gonna have you go with mine, but I'm gonna take what he said into consideration. There was dialogue between you both. Both of them. And that's the way that it should be, but there's other people who just are very much, well, I'm the MD and I know what... But it sounds like that's what happened anyways, that he overrode whatever the therapist said. But either way, MD always overrides us anyway. The MD will... Diagnosis and recommendations and everything. Have you met any shady MD, any shady psychiatrists who just prescribe... They're shady in everything too. Yeah. I hear stories left and right. I haven't heard... I haven't heard of like kid psychiatrists being shady. You think kid psychiatrists can potentially... That's risky though. I don't think so. There's too much to lose. Yeah. With kids, I don't think so. There's too much to lose and it's very regulated. Even though all the medications they use is off label. See, what I never understood, because when I was... When we were kids growing up, well, psychiatry and therapy was sort of a taboo subject. That's the list. Because I went through that stigma when I was 15 years old when the doctor had told me that I was depressed. And when my dad told me it was get over it, you're not gonna see a doctor. So it took initiative out of me when I was 18 to actually do it my own. Now I used to chalk it up as, okay, it's kids being kids, but it wasn't until I found out later on that there are kids who are severely... Who have mental problems because of the environment that they're in because their parents are fucked up. So a lot of it has to do with the environment generally or... Well, it could... A lot of the symptoms can be... I don't know. I don't know what the word would be. Maybe you can help me with it, Kitty. Induced maybe or... What's the other word I'm looking for? Aggravated by your environment. You know what I mean? Influence? Yeah. Conditional because of your environment. If you take someone out of their environment, sometimes they're... Yeah. There we go. Sometimes... It just depends if you live with fucked up people that are... For instance, my kids. I would think one of my kids... That's survival. Yeah. I have certain kids that would do so much better. They're depressed, they're anxious, whatever, but would do so much better if they weren't with their parents. Just didn't live there. Yeah. If didn't live with their parents. It's so sad because a lot... Because they add to the symptoms. But you tell me, Dr. Rozzy, some of the kids that we've worked with, you're just like, how is this kid so fucked up? And it means the parents and you're like, oh, that's why. Yeah. And I'd be as fucked up or worse than you or than that kid. Sometimes I'm not lying. Your kid shouldn't be here. It's you that needs to see the therapist. Yeah. I actually told that to one parent once. If you want to chime in about your childhood and how destructive it was, you want to talk to the doctor, 1-800-893-9562. That's 1-800-893-9562. Go ahead, Dr. Get some free therapy. Yes. Get some free medicine advice. Hello? Hello? Oh my God. Is it Tracy? Yeah. Hey, man. How y'all doing? I'm good. What's up, my nigga Tracy? It's your son, T. Morgan. It's up to your son, Morgan. Yeah. How you doing, my brother? Hey, man. Hey. You know, I bet I'll beat Milt Gibson in a fight. I bet you will. Yeah. He's a Scientologist. You know that? Who? Milt Gibson's a Scientologist? I didn't know that. Milt Gibson is a Scientologist. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. He like, yeah, he pays money to be like rich. You know, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. He's like high up on the Scientology. Really? I thought it would be more like 10. He's like an alien then. No, he's like a Thetan 5 or 6. Mel Gibson's like a Thetan 4. He's strong. He's high up there. He's high up there. What about, so is he higher than Tom Cruise? Because I know Tom Cruise is a Scientologist. Man, this guy is a Jesus freak, you know? Mel Gibson. So you know the power of the Lord. Yes. It's God with this one. The force be strong with this one, my friend. That's right. So did you spend your weekend in New York or were you in L.A.? Why you got to know my business? Because I want to know your business. I ain't telling you where I am. People want to be dead and shit. I'm not seeing where you're at now, seeing this past weekend. People want me dead. Who wants you dead, Tracy? Tina Fey want to kill me. Why does she? She's a good friend of mine and she want me dead. Why does she want you dead? She hate me. The whole world hates Tracy Morgan. What the fuck? Everybody needs to show Tracy a little love because I'm starting to feel a little self-conscious. I fell. You know? Like you make one little goddamn comment. Oh, man. And you hurt everybody's damn feelings. What's up with that? I didn't pay for this shit. Yeah. Come on. I'm cool. You know, I said my apology. I'm a nice guy. But people want to hang me. Hang man. They wrote songs about that shit. Being hanged. Hang the black man. Hang the black man. You know what I'm saying? That's all right with me. That's all right. Come on. That's the life of Tracy Morgan, huh? Yeah. I guess so. I guess so. You know, you got to be hung and tortured for your sins. Yes. But if you're a Scientologist then that don't matter. Why? Because you can pay your way into heaven? Hell yeah. Lay your way on up. I've been doing my Scientology research, man. So are you saying on the air that you're going to convert to Scientology? Yeah. I'm not saying a goddamn thing. We're just going to have to wait and find out. Hey man, you'll read about it in the papers. I'll tell you what. If I do, everybody up my ass with a damn fine toothed call. You know what I mean? Yes, Tracy. Everybody in my business. Right now is where if I had some child pornography, I'd be going to jail. You know what I'm saying? Well, why would Tracy Morgan have child pornography with him and me? I'm just saying, man. Tracy Morgan would never have. Tracy Morgan would never have child pornography. Right. Good. I'll tell you what. It would be on the fucking Wall Street Journal if I did. Yeah, it would be on the Wall Street Journal. Yeah, because you got to pay attention to the stocks. Of course, because Tracy Morgan's stock is so up there right now, right? Yeah, man. I got some. I got back, you know. I got Dow Jones up in my sleeve. So would you say your stock is better than Adam Sandler's stock? Yeah. Adam Sandler's my bro. He's good. He's down for America. He's making money. He's making money. He don't spend it in the stock market. I'll tell you that much. Well, it's because he's, you know. Yes, Dave. Say it. Because he's Jewish. You said the N word. Why don't you say the J word? Jew-ish? J word? I ain't no J word. You a J word. You a J word. That's right. That's right. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. He's a J word. All right. In the face. You know what? What, Tracy? Deal with it. Yes, we will deal with it. I was supposed to be in that movie Rush Hour. But then two weeks in the shoot and I was replaced by Jackie Chan. Yes, we know about that. But you were in that movie Cop Out, weren't you, with Bruce Willis? That was a fun time. I had a good time. You did? So how was it? You know what? I had a good time. You did? You did? You did? You did? You did? You did? You did? You did? You did? You did? You did? How would you rate Bruce Willis? Is he a stand-up guy? I mean, because he did get fucked out of his life. Oh, nobody say anything about Bruce Willis, man. He'll kick your ass. Well, he did get fucked out of his life. I mean, Demi Moore left him for Ashton Kutcher. She didn't leave him. I think they were divorced already. I can't just see why. But he, she wanted a little piece of young meat. A little piece of young meat. Tell it. Young meat. So the cougar wanted a cub. I like cubs. You know what I'm saying? Yes. Well, I know you like cubs. I like otters. I like otters. What's an otter? Like, they're so cute. Yeah. Well, Tracy, we got to get together and have a drink, you and I. Hey, I got an idea. Let's meet in New Orleans. Yes, let's meet in New Orleans because last time you called from New Orleans, you sounded like you were having a fucking good time and I wanted to be part of it. I miss that place, man. That place was real good. I'll tell you what. Sometime during the week, we'll go to New Orleans and we'll get trashed Tracy Morgan style. Hey, man, I'm down with it. All right. I'll see if Jerry Seinfeld comes. Yeah, let's get Jerry. He likes it down there too. He likes it down there too? Awesome. All right. All right. Then we'll definitely have to plan that. All right, cuz. All right, brother. Well, uh- All right, man. Hey, y'all have a good night. All right, good night. Thank you, sir. Thanks for calling in, Tracy. Hey, Ted. Hey, man, if y'all talk to Tina Fey, tell her I love her. I will. You want to plug in- And don't forget to check me out. Check me out. Don't forget to check me out. I'm going to go to New Orleans. I'm going to go to New Orleans. On my YouTube channel. On your YouTube channel, Tracy Morgan YouTube channel? Yeah. Got it. Yeah, just go to thumb.com and put in my name, and there I'll come. All right, then, you got it. I love y'all. I love you too, man. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. All right, how about we take a musical break? May I introduce the songs, or- Yeah, we'll come back, and we'll- Well, you don't- Yeah, we'll start off with- We're going to start off talking about- They're set with Ravens in Autumn by Sancela Asylum, here on the Verbal Vomit Show. Ravens in Autumn Ravens in Autumn are coming to your town. Ravens in Autumn will pass this willow brow. Ravens in Autumn will crawl inside your pants and make you do a very, very, very silly dance. Ravens in Autumn Ravens in Autumn And a cat should not be eating spaghetti. But you just keep on eating that spaghetti. Because you will always be. Spaghetti Jack I'm waiting for you. Spaghetti Jack There's nothing I can do. Spaghetti Jack To keep the fun apart. Spaghetti Jack Cause you're breaking my heart. Spaghetti Jack Oh, baby. Baby, I eat this shit from right out the bag. Dedicated to all the pretty girls. All the pretty girls. All the pretty girls. All the pretty girls in the world. And the ugly girls too. But to me you're pretty anyway, baby. You give me your number, I call you up. You act like your pussy on interrupt. I don't have no trouble with you fucking me. But I have a little problem with you not fucking me. Baby, you know I'ma take care of you. Cause you say you got my baby and I know it ain't true. Is it a good thing? No, it's bad, bitch. For good or worse. Makes you sick. You switch. So I walk on over with my Chris style. Bitches, niggas put away your pissed out. Dirty won't be having that in this house. Cause bitch, I'll cripple your style. Now that you heard my charming voice. You couldn't get another nigga. Your coochie won't get moist. If you wanna look good and not be bubby. Girl, you better give me that money. Hey, Dirty. Baby, I got your money. Don't you worry. I said hey. Baby, I got your money. Hey, Dirty. Dirty. I said hey. Baby, I got your money. Don't you worry. I said hey. Baby, I got your money. Yo, so I glanced at the girl. Girl glanced at me. I whispered in the air you wanna be with me. You wanna look pretty though in my video. Old Dirty on the hat and I let you all know. Just dance if you caught up in the Holy Ghost trend. If you stop, I'ma put some killer ants in your pants. I'm the ODB as you can see. FBI don't you be watching me. I don't want no problems cause I put you down. In the brown where you cannot be found. I'm just Dirty Dog trying to make some money. So give me my streaks and give me my honey. Radios play this all day every day. Recognize I'm a fool and you love me. None of you know. Better look at me funny. You know my name down. Give me my money. Hey, Dirty. Sing it. Baby, I got your money. Sing it, girls. I said hey. Just sing it right now. Baby, I got your money. And Dirty want his money. I think y'all should give him his money. Baby, I got your money. That's how I like to go. Baby, I got your money. That's how I like to go. I said hey. Baby, I got your money. Sexy, sexy, sexy. Sexy, sexy, sexy. Sexy, sexy, sexy. Yo, yo. Nigga played in the club like this all night. Bitches put your ass out and let me hold it tight. Yo, yo. You're looking at my wrist saying, this so nice. The price, bitch, is diamond shining, disco lights. You better help me solve my problem. I'm going to get this money and rob them. Lucky dog when I won the lotto. Ran up on my car, I'm going to carry it right on. But hold on. You can call me Dirty and then lift up your skirt. And you want some of this Dirty. God made Dirty. Dirty bust your ass. Stop annoying me. Yeah, play my music loud. And take the back of those Dirty to move the crowd. And say hey. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. Hey, Dirty. baby baby baby baby I need my money. Uncle Ricky, would you read us a bedtime story, please? Oh, please. All right, you kids get to bed. I get the story more. Yeah. You all tucked in? Yeah. Here we go. Once upon a time not long ago When people wore pyjamas and lived life slow The laws were stern and justice stood And people were behaving like they ought to Good night, good night, good night Good night, good night, good night Why'd you hit me? The barrel set straight for the cop's kidney The cop got scared, the kiddie starts to figure I'll do years if I pull this trigger So he cold dashed and ran around a block Cop radios into another lady cop He ran by a tree, there he saw the sister Shot for the head, he shot back, but he missed her Looked around good and from expectations He decided he'd hit for the subway stations But she was coming and he made a left He was running top speed till he was out of breath Knocked an old man down and swore he killed him Then he made his move to a new place To an abandoned building Ran up the stairs up to the top floor Opened up a door there, guess who he saw? Who? Dave the Dope Fiend shooting dope Who don't know the meaning of water nor soap He said, I need bullets, hurry up, run The Dope Fiend brought back a spanking shotgun He went outside, well there was cops all over Then he dipped into a car, a stolen Nova Raced up the block doing 83 Crashed into a tree near university Escaped alive though the car was battered Rat-a-tat-tatted and all the cops scattered Ran out the door, ran out the door Ran out of bullets and he still had static Grabbed the pregnant lady and pulled out the automatic Pointed at her head, he said the gun was full of lead He told the cops, back off, her honey hair's dead Deep in his heart, he knew he was wrong So he let the lady go and he starts to run on Sirens sounded, he seemed astounded and Before long the little boy got surrounded He dropped his gun, so went the glory And this is the way I have to end this story He was only what? Seventeen In a madman's dream The cops shot the kid, I still hear him scream This ain't funny so don't you dare laugh Just another case about the wrong path Straight an arrow or your soul gets cast Goodnight Knock em out the box rig Knock em out rig Ooh boy, that Uncle Ricky is really weird Knock em out rig I don't know right, what does he mean straight an arrow? It's so disgusting Knock em out rig I don't know, I think he'd be cracking an episode Knock em, knock em, knock em, knock em out rig Knock em, knock em, knock em, knock em out rig Knock em out the box rig Goodnight talking about talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking talking Break the ruler Presentation Crumbs Oh yeah We're back You just heard Sick Rick doing Children's Story Before that was Got Your Money by ODB Old Dirty Bastard and Kielis Oh Kielis, sorry Before that was a Maria pick Actually ODB was Maria's pick And the pick before that was Spaghetti Cat That was my pick That was a pick When I first heard that song it made me laugh I actually bought more songs off that dude Yeah I love that song, my cousin posted it on my MySpace back in the day And it has a video If you ever get a chance to look it up Ever since that I was like I wish they had, if anyone can find it Please let me know, extended Remix or something cause that song is way too short And it's a good song and it should be extended His album on iTunes I like those nichey songs That are just weird and retarded And they're kind of funny too Fun songs like that are always great I know Alright, so if you want to call in The number here is 1-800-893-9562 This is Verbal Vomit With Dave Kitty Doctor and Kitty Who's gonna be purring on Friday If I knew how to purr I'd purr And telling you about it on the Lovebites Sunday You gotta tell us Me and the audience what happened You gotta chime in You gotta tell us, you gotta chime in Well I'm gonna be here so yeah Oh next week people You need to tune in because we're having La Bistia come in Bistile's own La Bistia She's been in She's been in Media Blitz before That band was Before that had some members from a band called Undertakers which is easily hardcore And You got Rudy Medina who's an excellent Guitarist who's been in the punk rock scene For God knows who, God knows how long But he's been in there for a long time So next week tune in, you actually Sunday at the Redwood Bar you can catch him They're gonna be playing with Another 80's hardcore band Sin 34 Which is actually one, which was one of the First hardcore bands I got into One of the first California punk rock bands I got into When I was starting to get into punk And that I mean there's one thing I like about punk rock It's female punk rock singers and she's not the typical One she actually sings And she has good songs like New Wave Slut, Only Love Fads, 12 Hour Trip Stuff like that Alright so that's next week So tune in for La Bistia on Verbal Vomit So we're gonna have a nice And that's how you say it, Bistia? No Bestia I think it's Bestia, I think I'm pronouncing it wrong So she'll probably correct me next week So yeah we'll find the real Way to say it, I think it's Bestia You think you're right it is Bestia What did you say? Bistia, well he's a coconut It's okay You said Coco? A little bit, but I'm proud of that fact I don't give a shit I see you Coco I use Spanish when I need to use Spanish When he can Oh do you speak Spanish? I speak a little bit of Spanish Not fluently like that But I know enough to get by No, no puede Si se puede, pero el no puede Haha no puede You know I understand what you guys are talking So I'm not stupid Well that's because we're saying very simple stuff But I think if we If you guys had a conversation If you had a conversation I would be able to understand Because my grandma, she speaks nothing but Spanish Oh okay cool Oh yeah well my mom speaks nothing but Spanish Yeah so I understand what your mom would say when she would talk to me Well you know what my grandma speaks nothing but Spanish So what is it? What's up? What's up? Spanish pick Latin Spanish pick Latin? So when we were around she was like Oh hey I didn't know there was Spanish pick Latin That is crazy And she spoke it Burble vomit exclusive Guatemalan pick Latin I don't like Guatemalan say guatapeor It makes me feel bad Yeah the Guatemala They're always like so nice though Guatemaltecos Us Chapinas are very nice I think they're the nicest out of the Latin American Aw thank you I think they're the nicest out of the Latin American list Let's see I always want to start my shit list right Blast, put my shit list on blast Argentinians hate us Whoever doesn't hate us Salvadorians hate us But Argentina is part of South America They're not part of Latin America Wait run that by me one more time Argentina is part of South America Not Latin America Latin America is in between Mexico and South America That's Central America Latin America is from Mexico all the way down To Chile Chile Well actually that came out in the news That we're not being taught geography right here Well I was kick ass at geography I really was I don't even know where I'm at Like seriously Skid Row Studios I was gonna try to check in but I couldn't check in Hey we're on Foursquare Well it's on Foursquare I don't know if I've been out there as mayor I only have Facebook I only have Yelp And Twitter Yelp yeah I love Yelp Yelp helps me out in my restaurant decisions And that's it I use Groupon to help me with restaurant decisions I've always wanted to use Groupon But I don't know I don't use it like for the actual deals I use it to find places to eat And I've found really nice places I've heard With the Groupon I've heard a lot of people have a lot of problems With using those Groupons Because a lot of restaurants they'll put them up there But they won't honor that shit That's bullshit Do they put it on blast that Groupon does not work And to boycott from now on They will put the restaurant There's a sushi place right by where I live Called Sushi Haroba And they were accepting Groupons When I was reading the Yelp reviews But then all of a sudden they stopped using it And I read that the food quality there sucks For being an expensive sushi restaurant And the quality sucks Because I wanted to take my daughter because she loves sushi No we're not gonna have that Crunchy roll mmm delicious I don't know anything about sushi But that should be your mission I don't eat sushi You don't eat sushi why not I've never had anybody take me Sushi Gen in Little Tokyo That place kicks off I have never been there I went there for the first time a couple weeks ago What did you think Pussy Gato Yes What did you think I said but I thought you did eat sushi No I don't eat sushi Nooooooo My bad You should start eating sushi Because it kicks ass Well if someone wants to eat my sushi Go for it Won't your sushi be eaten on Friday Is it I thought we were just going Dildo shopping No not dildo vibrator shopping Didn't we just say I never ever want to sit on someone's face Yes I would like a competition Between either two guys or two girls Or a guy and a girl to see who's better If they think they have skills Hold on Cunnilingus Cunnilingus four syllables Concentration Or a cunning linguist A cunning linguist Or a master debater Obviously never heard of them Like I just said Haven't I been saying that I like Eating now hasn't that been established Already but in case it Just an announcement Yes I like that You know And we can tell if the guy or the girl I guess Likes doing it or not you can tell If you don't eat it you don't deserve it That's all I have to say Ohhhhh Okay now do you You go down or Yeah so even if it's stinky Oh it is never stinky You handle your business Please whether it's a guy or it's a girl Please do that I listened on Sunday we talked about hygiene We talked about wipeys and all that It has to be clean Because if it smells funky There's something wrong down there One of my big things is If I'm out and I'm going out And I'm going to hook up with somebody I will excuse myself and take a shower Really quick to get myself freshened up I don't want to go down there with I don't want to go down with guns ablaze and dirty I got to be clean down there To me it's a big thing you need to be clean down there Because if the clam is smelling like fish I don't want to go down there But see if the clam See that's a myth because Like I know we all have BO But if it smells really really really bad There's natural odor And then there's funk Like unhealthy funk I went to school with a girl in high school And she smelled And after high school She was married and she still smelled And I just thought about it How does her husband do it They say it's pheromones Ooh extra powerful pheromones And she lenders them to her husband Yeah are pheromones attractive to one another They say that Because we're so cleansed now And perfumed that We may not find our soul mate Because we can't smell them I found my soul mate So anyways back to the rest of the bitter crowd here Bitter who's bitter So Going back to The stinky muff We have to turn off the turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off We have to turn off turn off a relationship and all of a sudden you just do it. Bust out a wipey? Yeah, you do kind of get offended, but if you're kind of like, oh, hey, babe, you know, blah, blah, blah, and you bring it up in conversation, I wish Nancy was here and we could totally, like, do a role play and everything. But how... Okay, that's if you're in a relationship. How about if it's just straight out, just... And you bust out a wipey? Bust out sex and that's all it is, just sex. Well, if you're just busting out sex, then... Should they get offended? I mean, because she was working all day and she sweated and smelled. Well, that's what I'm saying. If it's just smelled like... And you happen to have a wipey right there? If it's... I was with... I was with the psycho bitch back then. If it smells... What does it have to do with wipeys? Like, if it's odor. Like, if it's odor, like, you know, we all put deodorant on in the morning, but as the day goes by, hey, it starts wearing off, whatever. You know, our natural aroma starts coming out. But if it's tolerable where you're just like, okay, that's what a girl smells like, then you... Because guys smell too. There's, like, guys... Guys smell. That's... I mean, there's smell, but then there's, like... And then there's sweaty balls. You should not have pulled your pants down. There's certain female smells that's natural and smells good. And then there's just funk. Yeah, but see, that's what I'm saying. If it's funk, there's something wrong and you shouldn't be down there. Because it's bacteria and infection. That makes it smell bad. Yeah, that makes it smell that way. Like, it's when you're with your partner and I know that, you know, I have my partner and everything, and when we have our partner and after, you're having sex or whatever, and then the day goes by and you kind of like, oh my god, you know, and you kind of get, what do they call, phantom smells or whatever, where you remember or right when you're done having sex and it smells in the air. Yeah. That's just the funk. That's natural. That's the natural. That's the natural. That's okay. There would be times when I was with, when I was in a relationship where we would have sex and I would smell myself because she was still on me. I wouldn't clean myself because I would like to have her scent on me. You know, and it would turn me on. It would turn her on too. I mean, to me, nothing turned me on more than her coming off work because she was clean about a lot of things and just eating that pussy out right after she came out of work in the car while we were still in the parking lot of her job. Because nothing turned me on more than that. Then I met this other girl and, shh, funk. She had some serious funk. And I was just like, ooh, and I go, I busted her wife. She's like, what are you doing? I'm like, well, you know, don't get offended, but you kind of smell something. Maybe because you worked all day and you're sweating. She's like, ugh. And she pulled up her pants and took off. I was like, well, bye. See you later. Well, yeah. It's kind of like, aw, kitty, you smell right now. You're like, what? Like, yeah, it makes you feel bad. You know, it's the way you present it. You know, you just be like, ugh. I didn't know how to present it back then. Maybe you should have gone back up and just fingered her or something. Yeah. You should have worked around it. Like, you know, and then like brought it up. I don't know. Because that obviously is going to be a mood killer. It was a mood killer. And you know what? That pretty much ended the whole thing between the both of us. And you know what? Oh, well. C'est la vie, you know. C'est ra, c'est ra. But that was my question. If there's funk, then there's funk. And if there's nice funk, then there's nice funk. Yeah, there's the scent. Like you said, like when in the spur of the moment, you weren't expecting to have sex and you're just like a quickie and then you're hanging off to work and then you have that person sent on you, that's normal. But if you're just like, oh, what? What is that? Then yeah, there's something wrong. And it goes for girls and it goes for guys. I have this, uh, speaking of quickies, now, is it, now, how does that affect the psyche of the other partner? If it's all about quickie, you know, because like to me a quickie is like, you know, you want to get that sexual release out real quick and you're all thrown into it. And after a while, I think she started, I mean, the partner I was with, she started to complain about the quickies because we would just have quickies, but we would actually... No regular? Well, we would have regular. We would have regular like, you know, like every other night, but we would have quickies like we would be at the store and you know, we'd pass certain things and we'd be like, well, you know, you know, let's go to the bathroom really quick. And we just like, you know... But she started complaining about it? Yeah, she started complaining. She said that's what her relationship was based on, quickies. Maybe she, you needed a more... A more regular one then. Maybe. You needed more intimacy basically is what she was getting down to. Ah. Well, now I know. For the next one. Yeah, because quickies is about getting off. Let's get our needs met. It isn't about the connection about the... One of the things, I don't know if it was on the Love Bite that we were talking about it, but it's and I hate to make this reference, but it's kind of of the... What is that damn movie? Avatar. The I See You. It's the... It's that connection. Yeah. Yeah. That connection of intimacy. Whereas opposed to hey, let's do it in the bathroom is get it in because I want you to get it in right now. So do you think psyche-wise men... Okay, men and women obviously have different psyches when it comes to sex. You know, they have different needs. That they both want met. Now, have you ever encountered a female who was all about them and not about the other person? Not about you? Yeah, definitely. Um, we all have innate sexual needs. Yeah. The way that it's broken down in society is that men have this need, women have this need, and women aren't supposed to have this need, and men aren't supposed to have that need. But there's girls that are just your typical fuck me, fuck me, fuck me. And there's your girls who are very intimate. And there are your guys that don't want quickies and want your, oh no, hold my hand, let's cuddle after. And there's girls that are like, I don't want to fucking cuddle. Yeah. Yeah, it happens. So, yeah, there are some girls where they're like, get off of me after they're done having sex and the guy's trying to cuddle. Their roles are switched after sex and the girl's like, can you I need my space. I need my space. And when we sleep together, let's sleep apart. And the guy's like, but I want to hold you. And no, don't touch me. So, mm-hmm. I've been on both sides of the fence with that one where I was the more intimate one. But then I think that jaded me because the other person was just like, you know, get away. You need to give me some space. So, my next relationship, I guess I turned the tables. I was more like, okay, well, I'm done. I got you off. I got off. So, why don't you go sit over there and I'll make dinner and just leave me alone the rest of the night. Mm-hmm. You know. Gosh, I'm just like totally letting out my sexual life out in the air. That's what therapists do. But you're not getting charged by the hours. I know. It's free therapy. Take advantage. I want free therapy. It's 1-800-893-9562. Go ahead and give us a call. Okay, so we have some other stories that we wanted to get into. Is he any, any, my, my, my, catch a tiger by the toe? Okay, we're going to start with Maria's stories because she has some, she has one that's really juicy. Well, it's not, I wouldn't say it's juicy, but it's a really, it's about a lady who severed ties with her husband. How does that go? Okay, David. Um, kids, kids, kids. Do we need to do some marital counseling? No. Um, let me see. Oh, yeah, well, me and, um, Dr. Rozzy were actually talking about this. That it was like an urban legend. About, that wasn't true. I heard, okay, so I read the story and I read it everywhere. But, Nancy said that it was an urban legend. Okay, so basically this lady in Orange County, um, but I don't think it's an urban legend because she got prosecuted. She got convicted of poisoning because she put a sedative in her husband's food. He thought it tasted weird and then he ate it and then he passed out and when he woke up she woke, he found her you know, down there and she cut it off and put it in a garbage disposal. It's called a penis. We had this discussion on the Sunday show. Okay, love bite. So she severed off his penis and put it in the garbage disposal. I'm still Dr. Rozzy. And turned the garbage disposal on. And then, she was still nice enough though to call the cops. You can take the Dr. Rozzy out of love bite, but you can't take the love bite out of Dr. Rozzy. When I read this, I thought he had called the cops. No, he was tied to the bed. Oh, that's right, he was. I forgot about that. She was nice enough to call the cops. You know why she did it? He called the cops? Mm-hmm. I was reading up on it today. She had said that he was being unfaithful to her. That's why she cut it off. And that really reminded me of the whole Lorena Bobbitt thing. Wasn't that what she did? I'm assuming that's what she did. But at least he was able to get his penis back on. But this guy will never have a penis. She was 48, he was 51. No, no, no, no. I'm sure he will have a penis because it destroyed him. But it won't. It won't be his penis. Yeah, I didn't say his penis. No, I said he will have a penis, just not his penis. Yeah, he'll have a penis because some man out there in prosthetics will be like, oh my God, he loves his John. I will build him one. For free. And they will build him a prosthetic penis. I couldn't do that. I'm sorry. If some chick was to like slice off my manhood, I would just commit suicide. I don't want a prosthetic penis. I want my real thing. I like my real thing. It's my buddy. Detachable penis. My buddy and I have been attached together. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Together since the day we were born. We've been best friends since. And to lose a best friend like that? No, I'd rather just commit suicide. I can just imagine what this guy is going through. So your penis makes you? That's it? There's nothing else about you? My penis and I, we're best friends. But there's other things that make me, but we're tied together. So you wouldn't be able to live without your penis? No. Actually, I'm... There's no other... There's not anything else to live for? Your daughter? Oh, there's other things to live for. I mean, I would live, but to the point where I'm an old man, you know? Oh, now it's all these. You know? Then I wouldn't. All these good goodies? Oh, you're old. Oh, wait, hold on. Did I say kill? If you're old, you really don't need it anymore, right? Actually, no. I mean, there's some active seniors out there. Will you be an active senior? If you're not an active senior, will you need it? It correlates with how active you are when you're young. So I don't know if I'm going to be an active senior. Really? Yes, it does. Oh, I didn't know that. My emphasis was in older adults. Your ontology, yes. Ah. So how active you are as a senior has to do with how active you are when you were younger. So if you're a horndog when you're young, then you'll probably be an old horndog. But if you're just kind of whatever, then... Activity in old age. Exactly. Exactly. Wow. Yes. Old age. Does that correlate with women, too? Yes, it does. Ah. I thought women's... Libido. Dropped after a certain age. Well, the menopause has to do with it. But, you know, if you have hormone replacement therapy. Well, there's... Well, I mean, there's women out there. There's women out there who have been through menopause who are still sexually active. You know? Mm-hmm. Well, just through the body changes and everything. Yeah. But we did talk about lube, so... You do need more lube because your natural lubrication does go down. And it's funny because, like, women... Women can't get pregnant after the menopause. But men can still... The menopause. You know, men can still procreate until they're, like, 99 and still be able to shoot whatever's there. The little guys, I know. But... I mean, can you imagine a 99-year-old father? Less. Less. Isn't... Isn't Jack Nicholson, like, 100 and just had twins or something? No, I don't know if he had twins. But he's not... He had twins with Beverly D'Angelo. He has twins with her. He was with Beverly D'Angelo? I didn't even know that. Michael Douglas, doesn't he have kids with Catherine Zeta-Jones? Yeah, he has... Yeah. But he's in the 60s. That's up there, though. It's not like... Well, he's not collecting seniors. What about the other guy that talks funny? I don't know. Sure, sure, sure. And he was in the movie with Catherine Zeta-Jones. Sean Connery. Yeah. He has a kid? I don't know. The thing is, Jack Nicholson... Okay, let's say he's... What? He's in his 60s when he had his kids? When his kids are, like, 30, his kids... He's gonna be in his 90s. Yeah. I mean, how do you... His kid's gonna be 21. Oh, yeah, my dad's... It's cool my dad's Jack Nicholson, but, you know, he's in his 80s. Oh, but what if they... At the prime age when the kid's developing, I mean, do you play ball with them or are you afraid you're gonna dislocate your hip? He has probably... He's probably gonna have his helpers do it for him. His helpers. He's gonna watch. His Mexican maids and butlers. Lolita and Guadalupe and all that. Do you want to play ball? Let's go play ball now. Mm-hmm. That busy. That busy right now. That busy fucking women. Go. Let's go play ball. Mm-hmm. What's his name? Our governor. The governator. Didn't he just pop out a kid? Yeah, he had a secret love child when he was about 14 years old. Oh, yeah, I love that Guatemalan lady. We're not that nice. No que no. No que no. No que no. No que no. With his housekeeper. And they kept it a secret for a long time. You know, I give her kudos for keeping the secret that long. Because she didn't really do it for the money. She actually was protecting her son. You know, because she knew... I'm sure she did it for the money, too. Well, eventually, but... Not like eventually. She was walking around in Maria's stuff in public. Maria Shriver's? Yes. Oh, my God. People would see her wearing Maria Shriver's stuff. So what about... What about the OC lady? So anyway, she got prosecuted and convicted. Catherine Keeve Becker. That's the... Becker cut off the pecker. That's the Asian lady, right? She did. That's the Asian lady? I didn't see her picture. Well, she hasn't got convicted just yet. It just barely happened like last week. She's in jail right now for what she did, for cutting off the penis. But they want to get her on all that stuff, on poisoning. Yeah, because she didn't drug her husband. Hey, this tastes a little funny. I don't know if it... Well, they had something for tying up. I forgot what it was called. I don't know if it was kidnapping or... Assault, I know for sure. An attempted murder. No, not attempted murder. It's not attempted murder. It's assault with a deadly weapon. Assault and battery? It could be... It wouldn't be kidnapping, but it would be something because he was tied up. He was held against his will. Yeah, held against his will. But I don't know what the crime is for that one. Yeah. We're not lawyers, as you can see. No, there's... Or even paralegals. No, none of that. We don't know how to handle the law. Oh, where's my cousin when I need her? Cousin, if you call, you can call at 1-800-893-9562. I know. Call in at the Verbal Vomit Show. Let's take a music break. You want to take a music break now? All right, I guess this will be our last block. No, no, it's our next block of music, isn't it? Yeah, okay. It's gone. All right, we're going to start. We'll be back after this block of music on Verbal Vomit. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. I'm out and out, lots of fun, but the pain is there And I don't wanna go for the one So hard to say goodbye, tears fill up my eyes All the good times we had, seem to forget and it looks so bad Back together, maybe mistakes, living in a dream where they're never awake Don't know why I still trust you, still confused, don't know what to do Only love, only love, only love for me You're my lesson, don't call up, just pretend we're talking about Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Us Hope of worth it in the end Trying to go while my friends Cause I'm not gonna play your game Go find another to do the same So hard to say goodbye Tears fill up my eyes All the good times we had Seem to forget and they look so bad Back together, maybe the same Living in a dream where I'm never awake Don't know why I still trust you So confused, don't know what to do Only love, only love, only love for me Ooh, yeah, what a block of songs that was Yeah Started off the set with Destroyer by Toxic Reasons After that was Repressed Aggression by Anti After that was Talk, Talk, Talk by Team Generate Wrapping it up was Only Love by Sin 34 Which are playing Sunday at the Redwood Bar With La Bestia Did I say it right? Alright, now we're gonna move into our last And final segment of the evening, people And we're gonna let the doc talk Talk Talk more about sexual freedom Actually, more about, I think it was bestiality And death Bestiality and death Yeah, no, but The perfect combo Kind of going back to what we were talking about before Yeah My cousin, I asked her Because we were trying to figure out What the lady was gonna be charged with And give her a minute Because she's logging in But I asked her And she The, we wanted to know Where's my thing? What is the crime called When you tie someone up against their will? And my future lawyer cousin Said that that's actually called false imprisonment And that's, what is that? Would that be considered a misdemeanor or a felony? Can you ask her that? Let me ask her that Yeah, let's ask her that Don't bouncers do that sometimes? Falsely imprison people? They're not supposed to Well, no, it's When bouncers, like, hold somebody They're not holding them against their will Because they're disrupting the club environment What if they use handcuffs? They can use handcuffs Because they're making a citizen's arrest If it's in the I think if you're being unruly Yeah, if it's at an establishment Yeah, you can arrest somebody You can citizen arrest somebody But you have to make out a report Before you have to file the charges yourself And all that It's like a big thing But it's, you know It gets the assholes and the douchebags out of the bar Because nobody wants an asshole and a douche drunk Walking around That's true Thinking they're the shit I mean, when I go to a bar I like to enjoy myself I want to, you know, get a little route Well, I've seen one Like, they handcuffed, like, a girl It wasn't cool Well, what did she do? Well, was she being unruly? Yelling? Yeah Handcuffs? Was that all she was doing? Yeah I saw a guy get tased once And then it smelled like carne asada No way What did he get tased for? Carne asada He was fighting with the security guards With the bouncers And then I don't know where my cousin went Lulu, are you Are you out there? Her law books Well, if you have the answer Go ahead and call us at 1-800-893-9562 Her text was this morning She said it's a wobbler I don't know what that is Maybe that means it's not solid It could go either way Like, it's kind of Not Yeah Oh, just verbatim wobbler Yeah, maybe Depends on the severity of the incident, probably Her case Is that right? Case Lulu Her case basis Well, while we're waiting While we're waiting for your cousin to answer Let's talk about your story Let's talk about bestiality, Jeff Let's talk about your story Well Did anyone die at the bestiality you saw? Were there any deaths? No No Death wasn't You're into bestiality, Jeff? I'm not into bestiality I've been to He's into watching it He's a voyeur I've seen I've seen a donkey show In Tijuana In Tijuana Voyeur bestiality Whoa Needless to say I've seen animal porn And you know It does not turn me on What animals have you seen? I've seen dogs fucking I've seen Dogs fucking a girl? Dogs fucking a girl Horses Girls fucking a horse Is that Is that thing true about Peanut butter and dogs? And eating out? I don't know But I was watching I don't have a dog Don't worry I was watching I don't know if you guys Ever seen the show Wilford on FX No Well On that cable There was this They had this episode Where I guess One of the The guy at the doggy daycare Would put peanut butter In his nuts And have the dog lick it And the dog was Wilford He was traumatized by it You know I guess there is people Who are freaky like that I mean I've seen videos It does not turn me on What's worse So it's always girls And these animals? No there's guys There's guys that fuck sheep There's guys that fuck goats You saw that? I've seen pictures of that You know These backward You know You know bestialities I don't know if it's still legal But bestialities Is still legal in Washington And still legal in Washington Illegal? No legal Oh That's where It's illegal? That's where a guy from I forgot I think it's ITT I forgot what business He was in But he was He was like One of the top dogs He was in Edom Clom, Washington Fucking a horse And he died When the horse pulled out He pulled out He pulled out his Intruder He was on trails So the guy died With his intestines exposed I guess the horse Was still like Swollen And the horse pulled out And when he pulled out He pulled out his colon And everything just came out And he died And that's true The guy was fucking Wait hold on The horse was fucking The guy from behind In his ass Yes So when he pulled out Because he was so big He kind of sucked All the intestines out of him He sucked He took everything out Like the I guess Like the plane When they flushed the toilet You ever seen a pink sock? Hells no I don't know what that is I don't want to know What it is It's like when It's like when you're When you're pulling your dick Out of the anus And it looks like a pink sock Because your colon Is coming out a little bit That's disgusting You saw that? I've seen pictures of that And why would I see one? How would I see one? You're talking about vibrators So don't be a prude about porn No but you're saying Have you seen a pink sock? I mean have you? When I stuck my dick In someone's fucking ass? Is that how I would see one? Or how would I see one? Nancy chimed in And said true story And you know Watching porn I'm sure you've seen I'm sure you've watched porn And I'm sure there's been A couple of pink socks I did not see any pink socks Well now next time You watch porn You'll be like No I'm looking out Thanks for fucking up that For me How? Because I'm going to see Pink socks now I don't want to see pink socks It's disgusting Wait so My cousin's now logged on What was the question We had for her? I don't know Oh what's I think what's the severity Of false imprisonment? Is it a misdemeanor Or a felony? Oh do you have an answer For that? Let us know And then We'll see you next time Bye Bye Bye Bye Bye Bye Bye Bye So okay Going back to So well All of us have allergies right? Yeah Like I'm allergic to other What are you allergic to? Penicillin Penicillin? Yes I'm allergic to cauliflower Just regular grass Regular grass Grass Regular grass Not special grass Not special Not special grass Just regular grass Grass you see on the street Herbal Medicinal grass No no That actually helps That actually helps With the That actually helps With the allergies No but So! There was this lady And was allergic to Dogs Probably didn't know She was allergic to dogs And what did she decide to do? She met up this guy Chat room Chatting Okay Beastie Allery chat room He says I want you to do my dog She says yes Comes over Begins to have sex With the dog And then Dies Because of an intense Severe allergic reaction She's never petted a dog And known that she Had that allergy I'm sure probably Bodily fluids Had never been exchanged before With that type of dog She was allergic to dog semen More specifically The article says That she was allergic To this particular Type of breed What was the breed of the dog? Alation Alation? Something like that Not an alpaca? I want No that's an animal A griffin Russell's griffin Well I They're so cute I mean I would figure Maybe she I mean Why don't you get to know That dog first By petting it And loving it first Or like Whatever I don't know how Loving it first? Yeah you know Pessing He was loving it already And he was loving her back To the point Of killing her Love kills them Love kills That's the lesson Love does kill That's one thing I could never figure out That's interspecies Breeding Alsatian dog How do you Talk somebody Into bestiality? Well you go into the You go into the chat room And you Go into the Bestiality If You would have been Listening To our show Since the beginning There's only been Two shows Consent There's been three shows Consent Oh yeah The new one hasn't Been put up yet No not Consent No consent? No it is consent But we're talking about Like even before consent Yeah how does How does somebody If we're getting into The psychology of it It's needs It's the needs That you have Those unmet needs That you have That you need To get fulfilled And they're gonna be Fulfilled by different things Like for Kids that are depressed Some kids Because! Yeah克克克克克克克克克克克克! She's actually done bestiality. And she had to do it at least more than once with other dogs or her dogs. Different breeds. You know. Maybe. It doesn't say in the article if she had had previous exposure to it. I hate when stories don't give you the full information. It sucks. Yeah, no, it didn't have any of her previous. And I'm sure she didn't document it somewhere where I don't think there's a bestiality diary of her. Today it was a St. Bernard. It was great. And tomorrow it will be a Yorkie. He has such a big tongue. Yeah. People do document their sexual adventures, you know. Well, if it's hers, I don't know if her family. If it was my family member and they died because of boning a dog, I don't know if I'd release her diary. Let me ask you this. I wouldn't. Probably not. Let me ask you guys both this. Do you guys have somebody, if God forbid, something, knock on wood, if something was to happen to you, do you have somebody to go into your place and go to your porn session and take it out before people discover it? Wait. Run that by me one more time. If you were to, let's say something, you're in a terrible accident. Do you have a friend? He's asking if you have like a power of attorney for your porn. Yeah. A power of attorney for your porn. Do I have a power? That's what he's asking. Like me, my own personal collection for porn? Yes, he's asking that. Yeah. No. Like, so like, like if somebody just like, you wouldn't care if somebody was like, you know, like one of your family members was like playing out your house or. My dad knows I have porn. Okay. Yeah. Because I used to have one. One of my best friends was like, you're my partner. Power of attorney for porn. And this is where it's at because one of my friends got into a really bad accident. And we actually had to go to his, before his parents, like his parents like had to fly over. Before his parents came, we actually had to find this pornist stash it because specifically told us, don't let my parents find this. I was like, Luisa, I know you're listening. If anything happens to me, distract my parents. Sam goes into my house to look for my porn. Even though my dad knows I have porn. Yeah. But I'm pretty sure your dad doesn't know all the porn you have. Um, no, he doesn't know. Like once back when I was young, he walked into my room and he was like, oh. Did your parents ever give you that talk? Like it's natural. It's okay. When they, when, or you ever, when you were, well, I don't know how old you were when they discovered it. My parents didn't. My mom actually assigned that to my cousin who was older, who was over 18 because she couldn't have that conversation with me. And my mom. Isn't that so weird that our parents can't have that conversation with, like I could have that conversation. With my kid. But my parents couldn't have that conversation with me. Yeah, no. It's like my dad can have that conversation with me now. And my mom still to this day gets mad. Really? And I'm like, I'm 30 years old. Yeah. I'm 30 years old. I, I. I'm a doctor. I have a job. I, you know, take care of my stuff as much as I can. And my mom still can't sit there and have a conversation about sex with me. So talk about anything else under the sun except for sex. Yeah. My mom's reaction will be. Is she one of those traditional women? Yeah, she is. You don't. You taught you. That's behind closed doors type shit. Yeah. Yeah. That's how my parents were too. Like when my dad found my Playboy stash. No thanks to my brother because he's the one who led him to it. My dad took me out. Give me a soap and told me it's OK. Everybody does it. I'm like, OK. But that was that was the extent of our sexual talk after that. Everything I learned, I learned through porn and friends, you know. Yeah. No, it's kind of same here through friends and stuff. But it's funny because like I'll try to get my mom to come out of her shell. And she just doesn't like this weekend. And my mom, if she ever knows, I told this story on the air. And my cousin. No, my mom listens to my show, though. My mom listens to my show. She doesn't. I was on verbal vomit tonight. And I know my cousin and my other half and some of my friends are listening tonight. And don't tell mom. Whatever you do. Don't tell my mom. I'm telling you guys. You tell mom. You are putting her at risk. This carbageddon. You know, you don't want to. You don't want to hear. What's what? What's the thing? My wife say. She's like, I. Yeah. I said it. I. The doctor does not want to hear. I. I do not want to hear that from my mom. Unless it's in the bedroom. She doesn't want to hear. I. No. That's loca. No, but she. It was carbageddon this weekend. And we were all chilling in the backyard. And she came out and she had just brushed her teeth. And she had a little bit of toothpaste. A little dry toothpaste. And I was like, ma, que es eso? I was like, what's that? She's like, what? And she's like. I was like. She's like, oh, es que me acabo. I was like, es semen. She was like. Is that how you say it in Spanish? Yeah, I'm assuming that's how you say it in Spanish. And she's like. Semen? She's like. Cochinas. And she like walked away. And then I went into the house. I went into my parents' house. And I was like, hey, dad. I was like, guess what I told my mom. And he starts cracking up. He thought it was hilarious. I would too. He thought it was hilarious. My mom. My mom just looked at me. She just gave me that face. That poochy face. That poochy face? Yeah. Oh, my God. And then I retold the story. She's like. She does a head toss. The head toss? The annoyed head toss. Yeah. Does your mom ever do the annoyed head toss and walk away? Yeah, she'll do that. You cross the line? No, but my mom. Luckily, I'm blessed to have a great mom that she forgives everything I do. And she'll be back a couple minutes later. Another moment. Yeah, I wish my mom was like that. No. So before you try anything. And this is a little fusion of the love bite and verbal vomit. Is. Before you try anything, anything. Make sure it's safe, sane, and consensual. Definitely. Now, don't you think she should. I mean, don't you think there should be like type of animal condoms out in the market? I mean, you would think, you know, bestiality is out there. There should be some type of protection. Well, no. Excuse me. Do you have any animal condoms? I'm sure there is. Sheep in particular? It's not legal. It's not legal. So they're not. It's kind of like child porn. Yeah. We all know it's freaking. Unfortunately, it exists and you can buy it places. You can go online and get it. But it's illegal here for bestiality. So you can't. You have to know. It's funny. Someone who knows someone. When I was looking at when I would look at these. But yet they're sheepskin condoms. Ironically. Well, they've been around for centuries. That was like usually. I think that was like the first condom was a sheep. It was a sheep. Isn't it? That's how you say semen in Spanish. Meco. Meco. That sounds sticky. I thought that was a slang term. Who said that? No. That's a slang term. Oh, my God. Don't say who. Oh, my God. I'm embarrassed. Why are you embarrassed? I'm blushing. I think. Oh, my God. Because of the Meco? Because of the Meco? Why not? Because of who sent the text message. Oh, don't say. I'm not saying anything. Obviously, I don't know the person who said it. I'm just blushing. That's all I'm saying. The doctor is finally blushing. Someone's got her. Finally. Sheesh. Let's all clap. Thank you for making her blush. No. That's great. Meco. I don't. Really? Yeah. I'm going to babblefish that stuff. You know what? I thought Meco was a slang term. For what? For semen. Meco. I always thought it was a slang term. Use it in a sentence. I just got a text message that said that's slang. Tienes mi Meco en tu boca. There you go. Oh, my God. Tienes un poquito de Meco ahí en tus labios. Damn it. I masturbated last night. I got Meco all over my pants. Ew. Like, even saying Meco sounds disgusting. I know. It sounds sticky. Have you noticed that when you say an English word like penis, it doesn't sound as bad. But when you say verga. Oh, everything is worse in Spanish. Everything in Spanish is worse in Spanish. I don't know why, but it just is. Suck my dick. Mamami verga. It sounds so vulgar. I took a shirt from my dad. And then there's no way I can translate this into English. But in Spanish. If you can translate what she's going to say, we'll give you nothing. Yeah. We'll give you a big old kudos. There you go. It says, busco a una mujer coja. Que me coja toda la noche or something. And I'm just like, oh, my God. So, like, vulgar versus like, I want to. Yeah. So, basically, your dad's down to fuck and he's looking for somebody who's down to fuck all the time. Way to go, dad. No, my dad. No, me and my dad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would say that if he knew. But every time my dad goes to Guatemala, because that's where we're from, there's these little knickknacks that they sell in Guatemala. And I'll bring one the next time I come in. When you look at them, they're like, oh, my God, they're so cute. They're like paisajes of Guatemala, like the Mayan temples and stuff. And you open them and it's people doing the Kama Sutra. Wow. And when I go, I always tell my dad, bring me some. And my dad's like, por que le traes esas cosas a la nena? I'm like, I'm 30. okay you're not as woman yeah so but that's how it is just so you're under decoration for the bathroom yeah exactly and the thing is one fell open and she's like i'm not like i was at a flea market in uh in hollywood with my friend and he came across these these little japanese uh ceramic things they were doing the sexual positions too they were crazy they looked i mean those that karma sutra it's like like the best guide to me for sex there is but it gives you all kinds of positions you know and it's a helpful guide it's a reverse cowgirl in there or is that like an american position so it's a cowgirl i think that's just the name i think the names change yeah i think that position has been around for a long time i think it's probably called something or some number it's something that we can't pronounce here in the united states so we reverse call you yeah because you're riding cowboy because you're going to so if you're going cowboy you're like yeah right i'm cowboy but if you turn around yeah right i'm cowboy reverse yay well like i said if you're going to practice anything new and if you've tuned in to the love by ssc safe sane consensual those are the words you should live by people if you're gonna if you're saying like talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about talking about Now what I wanna know is, honey, do I see your face? I know you've been hiding something, secrets in your past Ooh, yeah, I just gotta know what's behind the mask Please, baby, please, please, give me one quick glance Now how come I can't see your face when I see what's in your pants? Is it a good condition or an extra high? Such a good decision, I keep wondering why, why You ain't wearing silver bus, I got a season chance It's the month since Halloween, honey, I can't guess And if she likes it, let me lift the stage, let me take the beat Ooh, let me have a look in hell Yeah! Give it acid and give it a tack Sorry I ever asked Well, I don't know, can't work as much as what's behind the mask What's behind the mask, girl? What's behind the mask? What's behind that mask, girl? Sorry I ever asked Ooh! You gotta run cause I think you're Sure I'm bad, I think I'm too They get you, you're a freak, you're neat Bet you something's back to me You know this song would be great You should listen, you're not too late You should listen, you're not too late You should listen, you're not too late Maybe we'll make it as friends You're not alone to do this thing You know this song would be great You should listen, you're not too late You should listen, you're not too late May the storm and storm appear A quarter-pounder, May not, is Half-a-pounder, thirty-jokes One-pounder, five-a- Lot-a-Sich-O-Quotes May the storm and storm appear A quarter-pounder, May not, is Half-a-pounder, thirty-jokes One-pounder, five-a- Lot-a-Sich-O-Quotes May the storm and storm appear May the storm and storm appear May the storm and storm appear May the storm and storm appear May the storm and storm appear It's where the dreamin' starts It's where the jokin' starts You got some small ideas You got some big ideas It's where you calculate It's where you speculate Why don't you get out of there? Why don't you get out of there? Why don't you get out of my head? You are the one for it works Better be the foreign girl Take the foreign girl upstairs And learn a lot of foreign words A little enchanté Upstairs A little hey-oh-day Upstairs A tight-spinny boy Upstairs A little soya sauce Upstairs You got some big ideas You got some big ideas Upstairs Why don't you get out of there? Upstairs Why don't you get out of there? Upstairs Why don't you get out of my head? Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs When you want the art to start You cue the left side and the art to start To flow and flow and flow And leave a stain on all your puppets Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Upstairs Up investors Look at the stairs Look at the stairs Scram with all the phobias Steal until you show me yours This is where you kill a guy And you know he's still alive Upstairs, upstairs Why don't you get out of there? Upstairs, upstairs Why don't you get out of there? Upstairs, upstairs Why don't you get out of my head? Upstairs, upstairs Why don't you get out of there? Upstairs, upstairs Why don't you get out of there? Upstairs, upstairs Why don't you get out of my head? Upstairs, upstairs Yeah, that's when this pain starts That's when this pain starts Yeah, oh, that's when this pain starts Upstairs, upstairs Upstairs, upstairs Downhill, upstairs