Sid Veda interview on Men in Black 3, plus news, sports, and comedy break

To be continued... Skid Row Studios. You're listening to Skid Row Studios. You're listening to Skid Row Studios. You're listening to Skid Row Studios. Skid Row Studios. We're listening to Skid Row Studios. I'm not doing it with you. Please do it with me. Fuck that. Will you please have sex with me? At Skid Row Studios? At Skid Row Studios. Maybe. Okay. You are listening to Grand Theft Audio Radio with Jake Belcher and Brad Thoman. I don't know. Things seem to be kind of messed up here this morning. Like, not responding back when you want them to and stuff like that. But good morning, everybody. This is Jake Belcher. And I'm Brad Thoman. And you're listening to Grand Theft Audio Radio. A rather subdued opening for us. Yeah. Where's my effing right on time? Yeah. There's no volume coming out of this thing or something. So who knows what we're going to get today. Right. Could be a mixed bag of craziness. But we do know we have some guests coming through. Right. We've got a good show with lots of people coming in today. Yeah. I'm not going to tell you who, though. I'm going to keep it a secret. Yep. Until they actually arrive. Yeah. Well, I think we've kind of learned our lesson in the last, like, week or two. Yeah. Yeah. Let's not say that Christopher Reeves is going to be here. Wait, wait. He's not going to be here. No. Unless we're, like... Unless we're going to somehow... Grave robbers? Grave robbers and turn him into a zombie. Which would be pretty hot. Zombie Superman coming in. Yeah, but he'd still be in his wheelchair. You don't know that. Probably wouldn't you? It's very possible. Maybe zombies have... I think they do have amazing recoupative properties. I don't know. I think, actually, they tend to just continue to fall apart as they decay. That's why you see zombies in different... stages of decomposition. So maybe what we should do, if zombies ever do come back, we should put them all on horseback and try to get them to buck off the horse so they get, like, spinal cord injuries. Yeah. Well, that's why they say take out the head. That makes sense. Mm-hmm. I'm sure if you were to, like, just crack it across the back of the neck and sever any ties from the brain to the rest of the body, maybe they'll stop. I'm not sure. I'm not... They still have, like, a bitey face, though, right? Yeah, they would still have a bitey face. And last zombie film I saw was, I believe, either Zombieland or The Crazies. And The Crazies wasn't exactly zombies. They were just people who kind of went crazies. Yeah, like they had some thing in the water or something. Yeah, don't drink the water. Yeah, exactly. I'm gonna eat you or something. Yeah, exactly. Eat your brains. Well, and in fairness to them, that's what we want to do to all of our listeners every day. Is eat their brains? Eat their brains. Mm-hmm. And put some of our bullshit in them. Yep. And today I'd say we have plenty of bullshit for you. I think so, too. Cool. But let's start off our day the way we usually do. Holidays? What is today's holiday? Well, we did talk yesterday about today being World Turtle Day. Yay. Which is... Do you have any anecdotes with turtles? I guess not really. I haven't spent a lot of time around any. When I think turtles, like I think of the caramel and nut covered in chocolate candy. Yes, I see. Because those are delightful. They certainly are. When I was 13 years old living down in Florida, we were invited out with a group of... My father worked for Disney at the time and there were a bunch of Disney families down there working on different projects. And so the Disney families got together and we all went out to the East Coast of Florida and sat along the coast. It was really nice, but it was right in the middle of sea turtle hatching season. Now, the chances of coming upon them are relatively slim. But I mean, someone did, right? We did. We actually came upon a pod of... I don't know if it's a pod, but there were a bunch of baby turtles and you helped them get to the water. It's very interesting because we walked up and we're just walking along the length of the beach. And I'd say it was a good three to five miles that we walked back and forth, you know, round trip. Just, you know, it was just different groups. We were all having a good time just talking and just strolling along the beach. And all of a sudden we happened upon a hatching. And the way they know how to get out to the water is the cycles in which that these eggs are laying on the beach. And when they're laid, they should hatch when there is a full moon. And the full moon is usually going to be out over the ocean. So they follow the light to get out to the ocean. But it also puts them in danger because there's so much light at that time of the night that they can't be picked up by scavengers. So we were helping them, you know, picking them up and taking them out to the water. And then the rangers pulled up and they had like red coverings on their lights. And all of a sudden the turtles started going towards theirs and just help them out to the water. That's all we were asking you guys to do. And it was kind of fun. It was really surprising. I mean, we didn't expect to find anything. And actually at one point it actually started raining in the middle of the walk. And then all of five minutes, Florida flash storms that just come in and they'll hit you with five minutes of rain and then boom, they're gone. And we happened upon them. It was a really exciting little, you know, memory. That sounds pretty cool. I would love to have done that. It was a lot of fun. I got nothing on turtles. I don't think I've ever picked one up. I don't think I've ever really been around any. It's not like something you see all the time. Right, right. You see, you know, maybe if you go to the zoo and you go to the reptile section and there's the turtles. Well, I'm a little jealous of your turtle story. Sorry. That sounds awesome. It was a lot of fun. I highly recommend it. If you have the opportunity, if you live out in, I know we don't get them here in California, but if you are visiting Florida during that season, it's not a bad little experience to try and have. Sounds pretty cool. How about today is also National Taffy Day. Ooh. Yesterday you talked about the type you like. I love Abba Zabba's. Very good Taffy. That is good Taffy. Mm-hmm. Put peanut butter in there. Yeah. And that peanut butter is awesome. Yeah, it's so good. That's the kind of peanut butter I want on my peanut butter sandwich. You want to, oh man, I always have that dream of, and I actually did it once. I used to really idolize, not idolize, but adore the Reese's peanut butter inside the Reese's peanut butter cup. So I would, I got some and I broke them up and I took all the chocolate away and then I used that peanut butter to make a peanut butter sandwich with. Mm-hmm. It was a better idea in concept than it was in reality. Way too sugary and very hard to spread. Yeah, I would imagine. It was dry. It would have to be warmed up and you would almost have to mix it with some regular peanut butter just to give it some proper consistency. Yeah, then once you do that, it's like, what's the point? Yeah, you're taking away from it. I mean, they tried to come out with Reese's peanut butter. Mm-hmm. It was not the same. It was not the same. Wasn't even close. It was gross. Then the last thing we're celebrating today is World Coitus Day. Coitus? Yes. Sweet. Yeah, not bad. I'm not sure where we're supposed to be humping around, but... We're supposed to be around the world. That is what we're supposed to be doing today. And the preview for what tomorrow is so you can be ready. Tomorrow is... Wait, I'm sorry. Today is also International Tiara Day. Oh, damn it. We talked about that and I forgot to bring my tiara. I left mine at home too, man. I don't know what we're going to do. But tomorrow is... only has one day to celebrate. Oh. I'll give you a clue. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. National Morris Code Day? Yes. Hey. Pretty good. We should see about getting our entire opening transcribed into Morris Code and that's how we'll open the show tomorrow. That'd be interesting. No, it wouldn't. It's not going to happen. We'd have so many people tune out. Yeah. I'm not here to listen to the show in Morris Code. I don't even know what he's saying. Yeah, who wants to hear that? It'd be like me trying to do the whole show Strauch Habit. You know, you had... Yeah. This jumps. Backwards talking? Nicolette. It would be fun to do it that way but in the end, I'm not sure that anybody would really like it. If it was possible to be able to play it backwards and actually have the words spoken properly in that direction, that would be awesome. That would be badass, man. This weekend, there are tons and tons and tons of events going on. I think all these people try to kind of hop on the Memorial Day weekend bandwagon. Yep. So they try to be able to celebrate their things. We'll start going over what those are this weekend but probably on Thursday and Friday. Thursday and Friday. But it is a crud load. I can't even get into them all. Well, because we're... Just as a reminder to our listeners, we will not be broadcasting on Monday as it is a holiday. Yay! So we'll be having a little day off from the studio but hey, you know, you can always go back and listen to your favorite episode. Yeah, that's right. And... But we have the Memorial Day weekend so we've got three days worth of holidays that we have to cover over the next couple of days. Which is pretty awesome. Totally excited for that. Just getting some extra time off and getting to enjoy ourselves. Yeah. Gonna be badass. Okay, so we have a couple of pretty big news stories to me that are just not getting covered that are really offensive and anger-inducing to me. Story number one. It has come out that counterfeit Chinese parts are getting onto our U.S. military vehicles like our and Air Force and our airplanes and our... Because we're not building these things here in the United States. We're supposed to be. Oh. But... Oh, so what you're saying is that there are companies that have branched out and have contracted the Chinese to build these parts and then ship them over and then claim that they're American parts that are being put on our planes? It turns out that our supply agents, the people who are supposed to be ordering these things, aren't doing their due diligence and ordering from... They're ordering outside of what they call primary sources to keep things cheaper. Right. And this scares the hell out of me. The idea that if China knew that these bolts are going into our aircrafts, it's making them out of some shitty metal. Right. It hasn't come apart in like supersonic speeds. If this sighting is going on the side of a Humvee, let's make sure it's not as up to par. If we've got some molecules in the steel and make it so it just kind of... Become Swiss cheese when shot at? Yeah. I mean, you can't even lean against it. Yeah. Without putting a slight dent into it. Dude, that's scary, man. I mean, that is the type of thing that takes down countries. Mm-hmm. And well, it's also the type of thing that takes down our economy. Mm-hmm. I mean, if we're really supposed to be using primary resources, which means American companies... I mean, come on. We talked about about a year, a year and a half ago how all American dog tags are now going to be made in Italy. Yeah. Why did an Italian company even have an opportunity to put in a bid that should be strictly American-made for our soldiers? By us. So that if it fails, it falls on us. Because, you know, if it fails because of the Chinese are the ones who made it, then it falls on the guy who didn't order these properly. It just seems like any part of our, like, critical defense systems should be mandatorily made in America. I think that... I agree with that for sure. I also agree that anything the U.S. military is using should come from the United States. Again, I mean, I mean, I mean, is it really that much more money to have an American company employ Americans to create dog tags for our soldiers? It shouldn't be. Shouldn't be going over to Italy to a cheaper company. And if we're going to pay like $1,000 for a toilet seat, that damn thing better be American-made. Yeah. Yes, please. Yeah, I mean, let's start making this happen. That $700 toilet is going to provide at least two jobs for everyone that we sell. I would imagine. 100%, that's true. So... That story really... Discouraging and disappointing. ...really bothers me. I think it's only a matter of time until the U.S. military or until somebody on the major news networks kind of picks this up and goes, well, wait a second, what's going on? And then there'll be an investigation by Congress. And then there's like another sad story. Like, this is the state that many people in our country are now in. There is a guy who was getting evicted from his home here in Los Angeles. And he's a 53-year-old and he'd been keeping up and paying on his house since like 1987. And now that the economy's turned, he's lost his job and he's out of his 99 weeks of unemployment benefits. And instead of actually being evicted from his house or foreclosed from his house, he decided to kill himself. That's just awful. That's awful, man. And I kind of, you know, you got to look at the banking system and go, how is it that a man who for 25 years out of the 30 to 40 year loan that he had has such an issue that you guys can't work with him to try and figure some way of letting him keep his home? I mean, the fact that the banks are not willing to work with people and figure things out makes me hate the banks even more than I already do. And I fucking hate the banks. You know me, I've hated them for since last millennium. I mean, I can't stand them because they're just a bunch of shady shysters like, oh no, we can't lend you any money because we don't know what you're going to do with it. And what the fuck are you doing with your money there, bank? Right. What are you doing with my money? Because I don't know what you're doing with my money that I'm putting in here in the savings that you're using to loan out. So, yeah, the banking system, there's never going to be enough regulation because they're going to fight it and they've got enough money to lobby that that not happen. I mean, it would have been nice if they had just contacted this guy and tried to figure something out. I mean, even if they could have sold it for whatever his value in it would have been. After 25 years of paying off your house, how is it there isn't enough equity that he might be able to refinance and be able to have some cash to be able to make new payments on a new, mortgage, on a second mortgage? Buy a fucking trailer. I don't know. I mean, something, there has to be something that could have been worked out here and I think that we're probably going to start seeing more and more stories like this, unfortunately. Well, hopefully we'll see more and more coverage of it so that more and more pressure will be placed upon the banks to say, hey, look at this, you're now taking lives because you're unwilling to show a little leniency to people who have basically let you make billions of dollars in profits over the last hundred years. Years. 150 years. So, I mean, it certainly seems like Wells Fargo is one of the biggest. And this was a Wells Fargo. Of course it was. Of course it was. They are the, they are the most unwilling to make any changes in their mortgages. They're going to continue to sit there and back that. Why do you want to sit on a bad debt? What I don't understand, we're not going to bail you out again. There's no way we can do that. Oh, we will though because we're run by people who aren't really for us at all. They're just for the big businesses and for the money that gets put into another politician's campaign so that he can run and ruin more fucking people's lives. I'm just more and more disgusted by the entire system every effing day. And someone's got to do something about it. Someone should start some type of group like occupation. Like some kind of movement in which they might occupy the steps of the banks. Yeah, that's right. I mean, because someone needs to do something about these people. Here, you know, we've been capping on this Facebook IPO all week long. The worst news about it hasn't even, hadn't even come out yet. This is sickening. It turns out that, okay, Reuters is reporting that Facebook's lead underwriters, Morgan Stanley, JP Morgan, Goldman Sachs, all cut their earning forecast for the company in the middle of the IPO presentation. After struggling Friday night's first day of trading Facebook. It's like when everything was coming out, they were lying to the general public about what the stock was worth. And they were keeping internal documents on what the actual value of these were worth. And Facebook now could be in a shitload of trouble. Because if they were giving out differing sets of numbers to the general public into these big investing houses, then that's called selective dissemination. Where they only decided to give this information to that person, that information to this person. And that's against the law. Massively. Yeah. I mean, there are multiple regulations that are supposed to rein that in. So awesome. So the IPO story just keeps getting dirtier and dirtier. Yeah. Love it. And Facebook had a little bit of embarrassment on their faces yesterday. There is this index that comes out. It's kind of like the FBI most wanted list in some way. And what it is, is it's like the 12 things that could ruin the economy if they go wrong. And Facebook was added up into, it got like the number four slot now on, if it goes bad, it's one of the 12 things that could instantly ruin the American economy. Awesome. I mean, it's just one thing after another after another. And that was before the story came out. Yeah. And the only good thing that I heard this morning as I was flipping through the news channels before I came into the studio was they were talking about for the first time since, since its opening day, it's actually trading above its opening price. It is? Yeah. It's, it's not, not above 38, but it opened lower today than where it is now today. It was at, it was up about a dollar and 20 cents from its close yesterday. But that's still six dollars below what the initial public offering was. Yeah. It's like 580 below right now. It's up a dollar, a dollar 20 on the day again. Yeah, on the day. So, that's pretty crazy. I, I mean, I know last week we were saying fuck the rich people who can actually afford these things, but. Yeah. Hey. Still in kind of the same place. Well, I, you know, fuck them, but if they, if they wind up losing money because of this and because of what Facebook has done, because if this is true, if they have these, these, the differing numbers and it's found, you have to imagine that stock's going to plummet in value because, because of what happened. You would think so. So, there's also, there are, I guess Facebook's having a little other trouble with their, their user satisfaction. A lot of people aren't very big on this new timeline. So much so that they've actually decided to redesign it now. Yeah. And they're, they're listening to public pressure and saying that for people who are saying that, oh, we don't want this and we don't like it. I personally kind of like it. I haven't actually tried to use the timeline myself. I, I, as I don't have a functioning computer at home, it's not like I gain access to it. My access to Facebook is predominantly on my phone at this point. But, it looks kind of interesting at the same time. It certainly seems like there's a lot of people that are confused by what, the way it works and then they're going to have to make some changes and somehow incorporate the old and the new. I think a lot of people really got comfortable with the way it was and the timeline came out and now they're mixing it. Now it's mixed up a little too much for them. That seems pretty true. Hey, we had to go to our first break and unfortunately, I'm not getting anything to play here off of my YouTube. So, we're just going to give you some relaxing music and we'll be back in a moment. No. No. © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021 another job, I'll have these tickets that I can sell. I'm thinking in those terms, you know, like whenever I make a purchase that I'm nervous about, like I did when I bought a car. But then towards the last fall, Metro PCS decided they were going to move on to another campaign. And so, you know, I was like, oh boy, I don't know how long that gravy train is going to last. So I had to put a stop to making an effort for the season tickets. And then one day I got a call about Men in Black 3. Like I had auditioned for Men in Black 3 that day. And on my way home, I got a call that I got it. And as soon as I got home, I got a call from Carly, the account manager or whatever for season tickets. And she's like, Sid, you know they're going to be signing someone. This is before they signed Chris Paul. She's like, you know they're going to be signing Paul or Howard or someone. This is the last chance to get it on these prices. I was like, yeah, let's do it because I got Men in Black 3. And I did it then. And I was still a little bit nervous about it, you know, in the season. It's a lot of money, but I got amazing seats. Like the seats that I'm sitting in, like the section I'm sitting in, it's basically midcourt 17 rows back. Crazy. Section 101. For the Lakers, I'd have to, you know, I'd have to remortgage my house or something for those exact same seats. Give up your first born. Yeah, exactly. And the truth is the Clippers are a much more fun team. I'm going to say what you will about Okakoba or this and that. But I had so much fun just watching the Clippers the entire year. They're a younger team. And the fact that they're getting their chemistry together. I mean, the fact that they made it to the playoffs and made it through the first round is great. I was really stoked that they were as successful as they were. Unfortunately, you know, going up against San Antonio, I think Oklahoma City is going to have trouble going up against San Antonio. I completely agree. And I don't make excuses with injuries as far as a team's winning or losing is concerned because I believe injuries are part of that season. So the season that the Clippers had, in order to get to where they did, they had to sacrifice Chauncey Billups. Early in the year. And they had to sacrifice, you know, knees and stuff later in the playoffs. And they couldn't compete. I mean, full strength. They would not have won maybe more than a game against the Spurs. Right. Maybe two at the most. Maybe two. Yeah, but they would have made it a series instead of, unfortunately, the sweep that we were subjected to. But it's a start. And we have Chris Paul. And he's like Mother Teresa with a cross. I think that guy might be my favorite entertainer ever. And the fact that so many people hate Blake Griffin and Chris Paul. How can you hate Chris Paul? The guy goes and, like, serves food at soup kitchens on his downtime. It's ridiculous. And that's fine with me. Okay, that's fine. You can hate whoever you want. And people hating on whatever. This is a lot of Clipper talk. I don't think I came in here for this. No, that's okay. That's okay. We'll just do, like, 30 more seconds on the Clippers. I really didn't like them when it first started out because there was all this talk at the beginning of the season. Oh, it's a Clipper town now. It's a Clipper town now. That was just me. As a born and bred, like, L.A. guy, like, I don't have that thing where I feel I can't jump on with the bandwagon of the Lakers. I mean, those are my boys. And to hear, like, all these people, like, oh, it's a Clipper town. I take pride and happiness out of the fact that the Clippers were eliminated one day before the Lakers were. Like, yes, it's not a Clipper town quite yet. And I love Blake Griffin. The whole idea of what he did last year with interning for Funny or Die, that just seemed like it humanized him to me. I don't see how anyone can hate that guy. I think he's so exciting to watch, too. And what's going to be cool is, I know we said 30 seconds. I'm going to wrap it up here. I think that he's still so young in the league, he's going to toughen up. He's going to learn how to absorb those hits and be able to dish them out in a way that he's not going to get himself into any trouble. Right. Just like Shaq had to adapt after the hack of Shaq started working. So, but what I love is the fact that we are just a few days away from Jake having to watch hockey. Yeah. Because last night, the Kings, in overtime, beat the Phoenix Coyotes. That was awesome. And they are going to their second Stanley Cup. Yeah. And I don't know. Like, I can't stand watching that entire game. It's so boring to me. Yeah. But I did say that if they made the finals, I'll at least watch one game. That's right. And I'll see if the improvements have been any better. They used to have that thing where when they hit the hard shot, it made like that streak come out from behind it. Fox had that microchip. And I really dug that. That was cool. Because it did help you track the puck a little bit better and see how the plays were developing. Because when you're watching from a camera at home, that little black. Speck is very difficult to see where it's going. It definitely. I'll tell you what. I'm trying to be a new hockey fan. My problem with. The reason I'm not saying I am a hockey fan is because my problem with the NHL isn't that as much. I like when I'm watching, I'm starting to get a hang of what teams are trying to do as far as passing lanes and stuff like this. I'm starting to see the similarities between soccer, baseball, hockey. Any of these sports where you've got to get it to the middle, fill the wings, whatever. My problem is the fights. They don't feel real. There's so often they don't feel real. And I don't mean in terms of, yeah, they'd kick my ass. I'm not saying that. I'm sorry. Am I allowed to say that? Yeah. Yeah. We're, we're, we're in a sense. We're cool. Okay. Yeah. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying the hits aren't real. I'm just saying, I don't think they're angry. They just fight for fun because people like to see it. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. And it, and it, and it stops the action. I don't, I don't care for it. Like, I'm not a prude or anything, but it's same thing with like, like auto racing. I don't want to see cars crash. I don't want to see guys fight over nothing. I'd rather see hockey. And like, if they pound each other into the boards, awesomer, but you know, like it's when they stop and they put each other in a headlock and start punching helmets and I know they're not. And then you've got the, the rest who just kind of sit there and circle around to make sure that nobody else gets into the fight. It's like, why aren't you guys getting into that fight and stopping it? Right. Let's get back to the, let's put them in the penalty box and let's get back to play. Yeah. How about we, how about we treat the assault going on right here? The thing that would put both of these men in jail. Yeah. In the world and put them in a little corner for two minutes. Cause that's clearly the right justice. They're on timeout. Timeout. You're on timeout. Exactly. Awful. You sit in the corners. Okay. So, uh, what's going on with a men in black three then? Um, I'm apparently in it. See, I, I, um, they, I did a, uh, an insert scene. I think the, the, the movie was done and I guess they needed something to show transition. I'm guessing they needed to show, um, how maybe how Tommy Lee Jones had a sandwich in a cab. And so basically, uh, we put. They put me in a New York street, um, over in downtown LA and, um, you know, and I was a sandwich vendor and my favorite thing about, I mean, so many things about that job was so, I mean, I spent, you know, a whole day shooting with Barry Sonnenfeld and Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith and that right there is, you know, career highlight. That's awesome. Yeah, absolutely. But I'm like the whole experience, um, the, uh, the, the audition, um, when they sent one, when my manager sent the breakdown, uh, it was supposed to be so lucky vendor. And so I went in like middle Eastern garb and you know, I went there and I saw. I saw all the usual suspects. I see some of the same brown guys that auditions every single time and they've become my friends just from seeing that. And, you know, and I'm hearing a couple of the auditioners before me and they're putting on the same accent that I was going to put on. Um, you know, and they're doing pretty much the same thing that I was doing when I was reading the sides at home. I get in the room and I say to the lady, I was, um, we're talking a little bit. She hears me talking like this and I go, um, you want an accent, right? And she said, yeah, she goes, uh, New York. And I was stunned. I was like, awesome. That's just like me, but rounded off. You know? Like, that's just like me. But rounded off. You know, like, that's just like me trying to speak even faster. So, um, so I was no problem. And I was wearing, um, I didn't wear Middle Eastern garb or anything. I wore a hoodie and a headband, keeping my hair back and scruff like on my way to what I got now. Mm-hmm. And, and, and they liked it that they, they said, bring the headband. And I was like, and when I was seeing everyone else, I was like, I understand that instinct. But the fact that it's on a street in New York says, you know, if you've ever been to a street in New York, they don't like even, even if you're in New York, you're not going to be able to see the street. You're not going to be able to see the street. So, even, even if you were, you're right off the back of the boat from Pakistan, you're not wearing Middle Eastern garb to try and sell things on the street if you want to sell them to New Yorkers. You probably have a Mets jersey on already. Right. I mean, I think, I think, I think they hand those out when you get off the boats, when you get into New York, because that way you kind of blend in a little bit better. Right, right. What they do. Not as easy a target. Well, they have two lines coming out, coming out and when you depart and you can go to the, the, the Mets Islanders side or the Yankees Rangers side. And they try and entice people into the other side. The other side is best they can, but realistically anyone who's ever seen a newspaper is going to go, okay, if I have to adopt a team, I might as well be happy. Yeah. Give me them Yankees. Give me them Rangers. Yeah. Well, hey, you know, the Rangers still have a shot at getting into the, into the, that's kind of what I'm hoping for. That's what I'm definitely hoping for. An LA New York series at any, at any level, whether it be baseball, football, hockey or soccer, or, or even, or baseball. I don't, soccer I could give a shit about actually, but. Oh my God, a Dodgers Yankees series? Of course. I completely agree with you. They're, they're my two, they're my two favorite cities in the world. Man, like I can't watch baseball. I mean, it really is just the boring sport in the world to me. I can analyze the stats afterwards and all that other stuff, because I like fantasy baseball, but I can't actually sit down and watch a game. I don't drink enough, like to, to enjoy it. I think you have to enjoy four or five beers over a couple of hours to be able to be like, yeah, this is now my space. I completely agree with that. Well, one, I can help you because I love your refrigerator out there by the way. Thank you. Two. No, it's one of my favorites. That one is the most numbingly boring game. It's like, there, there's an episode of the Simpsons long ago when the, when the. When they brought in the All Stars, like. No, no, that's one of my favorites. That one was my favorite. That one with Dallas Robbie, that's excellent. No, the, the company goes to an isotopes game, the Springfield Isotopes game, and, and it's during Homer's month that he didn't drink. And so everyone else around him is drinking and he's not, and he looks around and he goes, I never knew how boring this game is. And it's the absolute, it's like playing golf. I can't play golf sober. That's just stupid. That's chess. But, you know, with blisters. I feel that I probably will get into golf later, but I'm still enjoying time with my new wife. I think it's just an excuse to get away and be able to ditch your women. Well, I'll tell you what. I have one thing. I have Tiger Woods 2013. So that's a way to play golf without leaving the comfort of your home or, you know. I hear they made a lot of changes to that this year. How are you enjoying it? I suck. Is it all about the swing? Is it the one where you actually have to do the swing or do you still have the control? It's the swing. And the thing that, like, what I was excited about is I was like, there's no way that it can be so accurate as to know that I'm not just swinging like a baseball. But it knows. Like, if I don't do, like, the way that I, you know, I haven't played golf in many, many years. But if I don't do, like, that way that, like, if I were trying to golf again, then it, like, misses the ball or, like, or just backswings and then goes back, backswings, goes back. I'm like, what are you doing? I heard that this new one has, like, big moments from Tiger's life. You can go back and play, like, three-year-old Tiger on the Mike Douglas show trying to hit a shot in the middle of the studio audience. Oh, wow. I did not see that part. I saw, I think, behind the greens on seven there's a whorehouse. But I did not see the young version of Tiger. That's awesome. So I like when games do that. It adds a different level and a different layer. They did a funny thing last year on South Park about Tiger Woods 12 where you're having to, like, avoid getting hit in the head by his wife. That's right. That's right. Yeah. That was awesome. Then before we move on from the baseball thing, though, my favorite episode of The Simpsons with baseball, when I think about it, was Dancing Homer. Yes. When he got, you went to the majors? Yeah. Yeah. And then he and Burns become friends for just that night where they do the wave and then he gets up there to start dancing. He's like, I can't believe I've been sitting next to this buffoon this whole time. That show was awesome. Hey, we got some sad news to pass on today. Oh, no. Unfortunately, one of the people that have helped create more fat people and more lazy people than anyone else in America passed away yesterday. The inventor of the remote control. Oh, Lord. The guy, his name was Mark Hopkins, and he invented the remote control 57 years ago. It took a while for it to get on the market, but that was sad to see that guy go. Yeah. I don't know what else he ever did that was better than that, but the remote control. Is there anything better than that? Not much. I mean, that is a darn good one. It's huge. I mean, like, think about how you get gripped when you can't find your remote. Oh, my God. You're just like, okay, what am I going to do? I have to get up and control my TV with my fingers? Not only that, but I don't know where a lot of those buttons are. There's a menu option that I doubt that there's a whole new screen for it. Yeah, I just don't want to have to deal with that. I have to look on the side of the TV and look at which one. I want the channel up button. Up button. Exactly. This completely sucks. I remember you. You used to have the TV with the big dials on it. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Yeah. Every time you had to change between things. And basically, when I was a little kid, I was my parents' remote. Exactly. With pliers. Oh, really? Because if the knob came off and it was just the metal thing out, then you had to turn it with pliers. Yeah, we had that for years. I remember that TV. That's how I saw my first boobs. Really? Prism, because Prism was a Philadelphia pay station back in Philadelphia. And if your pliers could get it between the two channels, and just stay there for a little bit, you could almost see really fuzzy boobies. And as an eight-year-old, I was thrilled. Hell, yeah. I mean, if I had that in here. I didn't know why I was thrilled, but I just knew it was nice. If I had that in here now, I would be playing with those pliers trying to get some boobs to come up. I remember when I moved up to La Cunada, and there was a cable line that was still in the house. It still was active. Like, they didn't come out and shut it off. So we had one TV that had some basic cable channels. But it also, you could get up to those adult channels, but they were always... Yeah. Yeah. Like, it had that distortion. Yeah. But there were points there where you'd be watching, and all of a sudden, that distortion would just kind of shift and stop. And you'd have three-quarters of a screen. And granted, it might be in weird colors, but all of a sudden, there's a pair of tits in front of you. Right, right. And they're bouncing up and down. You're like, oh, this is awesome. And then it would start up again. You're like, all right, change the channel. You have to see boobs for three seconds. As pervy as it sounds, I really didn't know why I enjoyed seeing it. But I knew that I wasn't allowed to. And the fact that I found a way to do it, like, you know, I don't know, as an eight-year-old, you feel like, man, what's up now? Yeah. This world's going to be mine. What's next? I mean, so, like, our next story probably would never have happened if not for the invention of the remote control because you would never have gone up 200 channels to get to something else. I mean, if you kept having to click and turn and click and turn and click and turn. Yesterday, they canceled Dog the Bounty Hunter. Eight seasons of that show came down to creative differences. What type of creative differences could they possibly have had on how to send this guy to catch criminals? Yeah. Right? I have no idea. I'm amazed it actually lasted eight seasons. That's a long time. That is. That's as long as House was on because House just had its series finale earlier this week. And that was one of my favorite hour-long dramas. Right, but don't say anything about it, by the way. It's on my DVR at home. Okay. It's a very good episode. You'll really enjoy it. And Cal Penn comes back for it, right? The only person who doesn't show up in some kind of cameo is Lisa Edelstein. Really? And I'm really amazed. I just posted it myself. But everybody else does make a recurrence in there. Even if it's just for a couple of seconds to talk to them, there's still everybody else does come back. She's the first one I would think would have to come back. Yeah, I was too. But the other girlfriend that he had years before that, the lawyer, she has a relatively larger scene with him. So maybe it was supposed to be split up originally, but I don't know. She just wasn't present. I was kind of surprised. Okay, so this brought up a question in my mind. I had this argument with her. I had this argument with my friend a couple of days ago. What do you guys think the moratorium is on how long a show has to have already aired for you to be able to talk about it? Because I was talking to something that happened like three weeks ago on an episode. She's like, oh, don't tell me, don't tell me, don't tell me. I'm like, am I supposed to find out beforehand what you've seen every time? I think one week is fair if you start talking about something and you say, wait, wait, I haven't recorded. But if within that week you haven't taken the time, it's fair game. I think it depends. It depends on the audience. I mean, like if you're talking to a friend, like I loved the show Friday Night Lights. And the couple of friends I had who loved it too, like we loved that show. Like, you know, there's no way, you know, we're going to miss one. So with some of those friends, if I'm talking about it, I'd first check it. You saw it, right? But after three weeks, if you haven't seen it, you're probably not that big a fan. I mean, I should be able to say what I have to say, you know. Absolutely. It's, we are alone in the studio for the first time. Management just left. They finally trust. They left us. Oh, wow. Look at that. That's not bad. I just got a text that said they've left us alone and for us to lock up. Okay. We should burn it down. Pardon? Was Sonya management? Well, yeah. And she's as close as it gets to management here. But so that's exciting, man. I'm totally stoked by that. Sorry, back to the subject. This was like something three weeks old and it wasn't even like something major. I mean, it was pro wrestling. I mean, so there's been like all these other shows since then that he's seen. So like, how does he? How does he justify to me that you can't talk about that? Because usually that stuff is recapped in the following, in the next week's episode. So they would say, you know, it's not like a last time, but they'll show some kind of highlight. They're really good about, you know, stretching that time with the wrestlers to not have them wrestle as much as possible. With the wrestlers. Like, I mean, I can understand it with a show like 24. So you definitely don't want to know what happened last week because it's important for this week. Wrestling? I know. He's like, I'm talking about like a move sequence and how things went. He wanted to take it by surprise. I know. It's insane. I love pro wrestling. I mean, that's like my stupid life addiction. I can spend all my time in the world doing that. I'm actually going to go out to some awesome wrestling this Friday night in Reseda. There's, to me, the best wrestling in the world, and I follow many different organizations, is right here in Los Angeles. It's called Pro Wrestling Guerrilla. These are the guys who their next step are the WWE. And when I first started watching it, Brian Danielson, who's now the WWE champion. Yep. And CM Punk, who's now the WWE heavyweight champion, were their two top guys. So these are the guys who are stepping up into that role. They're the best. And there's some really exciting wrestlers to go see that are still with PWG who get called up to do one or two little bits, and then they'll come back down. And a lot of fun. Anyway, anyone listening, get a chance to go out to Reseda. Tickets are going to be tight, but it's definitely worth the, what, $10 or $20? They've actually gone up quite a bit in the last couple of years. Now it's $25. $25. $25. Okay. Is it? Okay. I paid like $8. I paid like $8 to get in the first time. This is three times more than what it started at. Okay. Especially since it's in the same location. It's not a bigger venue, which is kind of unfortunate. Anyway. It's a drag. Okay. So yesterday came out a new invention from a DVR company that is probably going to be big problems for the network. This is coming out from Dish Network, which I guess is like the fourth biggest television provider. And they have a new feature called AutoHop. AutoHop automatically records every minute of primetime programming on ABC, CBS, NBC, and Fox, and then it cuts all the commercials out of it. Wow. Automatically. Automatically. Wow. You don't even have to fast forward through the commercials anymore. Which, I mean, unless I'm watching like a live sporting event, I never see commercials. Yeah. Because I don't watch anything not on DVR. I see DirecTV probably having to pay a lot more money to these networks when the contracts come up. Dish? I mean Dish. You mean Dish. Because every couple of years you see there'll be like an announcement scrolling at the bottom of your screen that your provider's like, you know, contact your provider because by this date we're not going to have this channel anymore unless you, you know, convince them to agree to our terms. And if you're going to cut out all of the commercial revenue potential for those channels from, because you said it was Dish? Dish. Dish. Because the Dish users are going to now not have to even bother watching them. They're going to, they're going to want their money. They're going to want their money back somehow. Yeah. The commercial industry has been changed. It has changed so much just in the almost eight years I've been in LA. Like I've gotten, I've gotten a lot of luck with commercials. I've gotten, MetroPCS was like my sixth of seven nationals. Wow. First one that was a campaign. First one that got me a new living room. But I mean, it was like, I'd had some luck with commercials, but from the beginning until now, I mean, it's the DVR. And as much as I love the DVR, the DVR is going to change the, the DVR and, and also of course the internet are going to completely change the industry where like typical commercials and it's already are going, you know, going away because they're not the best way. They're not the best way to market a product. They are going away, but at the same time, they're sneaking themselves more and more into our social media. Well, that's what I mean. When I say going away, they're going away from TV. Oh, they're leaving TV and heading into the, into that area. Okay. I'm sorry. I have a friend who told me that he saw one of the MetroPCS commercials on the big screen in the theater like two years ago. Wow. I've never seen it. And I, you know, that's the only time I heard it, but like stuff like that where, you know, like when, when you go to the movies or, or just. Waiting for, for a YouTube clip to, to open up whatever it is, they're going to play one of those commercials that we otherwise would have seen on TV. Right. The thing is like, they don't have the discipline to do it on YouTube. When you start watching something and they bring up that video, like a commercial, sometimes that commercial is four minutes long. I mean, like if you would just say, okay, I'm going to run a 30 second commercial in exchange for you watching this. I'd be cool with that. Yeah. But if you want me to sit down and watch something that's more than four minutes long. Yeah. A four minute short film. No, thank you. That is offensive. I just want to watch a Skrillex video. All I want to do is. Like, like zone out for a couple of minutes and enjoy myself. But you want me to learn about some dog shit scooper or something for four minutes. No, thank you. I got, I got a couple, like actually the three webisode series that I'm doing with, with three separate groups of friends. And, and, you know, they've been, they're looking into, you know, then like either, whether it's a Funny or Die channel or just putting up a series of videos on YouTube, which is, you know, what we're doing so far. Right now we're saving them until they're all like, so we can put out like six, you know, podcasts. So we're saving them until they're all like, so we can put out like six, you know, podcasts. So we're saving them until they're all like, so we can put out like six, you know, podcasts. And then we're going to do like a polished edited episodes in a row. You know, we, we've shown a couple just like screenings at the, you know, at a bar or whatever or on Facebook. But once, I think, I think that's, that's another one of the steps and going from just these silly little videos to a channel is, is, is that pause. Is that okay? If you're going to watch these, you're going to have to wait 60 seconds to figure out if you want to get Tampax. Yeah. That's, it's just awful. I mean, I, I know that we were getting into a time where you get lots of product placement. Like we are going through the background of the scene and you see, you know, a BMW roll by, but you see 12 BMWs roll by. You're like, oh, well only BMW sponsored this film. That doesn't happen in real life. That actually doesn't bother me at all. The product placement thing. And it's like, I used to love that show for one season, Studio 60. And there was, there was a, like the second or third episode I think was about them trying to convince the show that they have to do product placement to save money or so they don't have to buy it, whatever. And, and they found a way that. I thought was brilliant where they, they made the backdrop, um, like sunset strip, like the part of LA from like, uh, like La Cienega to, I don't know, uh, like the stretch that they called the real LA, which is kind of conceited, but whatever. Um, and you know, I loved it. And I don't know if you ever go to my website, SidVeda.com. It's where, um, it's pretty much where the, uh, the background comes from. I was like, I love that idea. It, uh, basically it gives you every single one of those billboards is a new ad space. So if. They're going to, if, you know, corporate or network or whatever is going to insist on you putting Bud Light in, you know, in there somewhere just so it's always on. So Bud Light's happy and we don't have to pay, whatever. Then just put it on one of those billboards and you can forget about it. And, you know, real fans of the show, whatever. It's not going to bother us. You know, it's not like I'm going to be, oh, there's such sellouts. Of course there's sellouts. We're not doing it for free. Um, so yeah, I have no problem with product placement. I mean, have you ever been involved in like a place where you had to show a product on something like that? Like where, um, let's say that Men in Black 3, like you guys were, did you have a specific hot dog company that was sponsoring it? Did it have to be a Nathan's dog or like? Well, no. For the one scene that I did, for the scene, the day that I spent to get myself on screen for, I think a second and a half, there was no product, but there was nothing. They didn't isolate the shot on anything specific enough that you would have been able to do that. Right. Um, I can go like other than the, the national commercials are obvious, obviously. I mean, that's different. I mean, that's what it's about. If they didn't have that there, you'd be confused as to what are they selling? These two guys are just. But that is one place that product placement doesn't really exist. I mean, you don't see like a commercial. Other products. Yeah. Like a, like a, a, a kind of like a subsidized by Coke or something. I mean, like a commercial for handpacks and a girl drinking a Coke. To an extent. You'll see some partners. Um. You see it within the same companies like, like Unilever, I think. I think they're the ones who do the, the Old Spice commercials and they'll bust into the Kleenex commercial. Well, Kleenex is part of that same company, the overall company. So you kind of get that cross branding. Right. I mean, you do see occasionally little things like that. I'm surprised it's not more like, like Procter and Gamble. They have so many different products. How is it then when they're promoting one product that right behind the person is another one of their products being highlighted? It's not being spoken about, but you see that that's a product from Procter and Gamble. To help foot the bill. Yeah. You know, and this might be one of the changes in which, uh, you know, advertising might go just with the new media and stuff, just because it's, it's a very different, um, very different platform from, from. From TV. I mean, it comes from, you know, you have 13 channels and, uh, you know, the, in order for them to make this show, they have to make these commercials to pay for it. And yeah, what are we going to do? Go check the internet in between? No, of course. So you sit there on your couch, have kids so that they can change the channel for you. Unfortunately, what Jake was just talking about with, in regards to like, you know, you don't see a Tampax, Coca-Cola and Tampax together, but that would be a hilarious commercial. I think it was like, you know what? When it's my time of the month, I really need two things. I need. I need Tampax tampons and a Coca-Cola. God, that's awful. And then the partner commercial is the husband promoting medical marijuana. And this is where I go for a week a month. That is awful. So, uh, what big things do you have coming up this summer? Um, the, uh, these, actually the third of those webisode series, uh, it's, it's going to be called LOL. We're going to try and get a trailer, uh, produced. It's going to be produced by Comic-Con because the two guys who wrote it and are, it's basically their baby. Um, they, that, that was the initial goal to get, to get, to get a trailer. We were hoping to get some episodes by then, but, um, you know, things fall through. Um, they're, we're going to try and get a trailer for this thing, uh, to show at Comic-Con. I'm excited about this, this series that, that, that they're developing. And then, um, the summer. Do they already have a place to exhibit it down there? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They, they, um, they, I, I, the detail, they go to Comic-Con every year. Yeah. So they, they reserved, like they, they have the table for it or whatever it is that they need. Well, we're not quite ready to announce it, but we will be having our own show Comic-Con, um, down there. So, um, maybe we can figure out some way of throwing that trailer up in our, in our preview show or something like that. That'd be fun. That'd be great. Absolutely. Yeah. I, I, I told these guys, like I was hoping to go, but I was late on the ball and obviously I guess the hotels have been booked for like the last nine years or whatever. I know a couple of spots that are available. Do you? Yeah, I do. I might be in touch shortly because what I, what, what, what I'm thinking is I'd like to go the night before. Um, like if we find out soon enough when, um, ours would be, if, if we get it ready, uh, showing, then I'd like to go for that day. And then, yeah, I'll definitely be in touch. That'd be awesome. Yeah. I mean, we, we, it's not definite yet, but we do have the offer now. There's a great comedy club down there that is right next to the spot that we're going to do a couple of recordings of our episodes and a couple of live shows. So, uh, stay tuned for more information on that. It's going to be freaking awesome. Very cool. I can't wait. I'm excited. I'm excited for that. Yeah. And, um, as far as the, uh, as far as Men in Black is concerned, like I'm my, I'm so excited just to find out if I can put it on my resume. Uh-huh. Like I have a feeling. Are you going to do the Thursday night at midnight screaming just to find out that quickly? You weren't invited to the premiere out on the, uh, Intrepid that's going on in New York. Did you, did you see that? Uh-uh. Okay. The Intrepid, which is now a, a space naval and, uh, airship museum is going to be where they're hosting the premiere. Uh, for Men in Black 3. Wow. So they've got the entire ship and they're going to set up a big screen at one end and be able to seat, you know, several hundred, if not thousands of people on this boat. Holy crap. Yeah. That sounds pretty cool. Well, they did, didn't they do like a college basketball or a professional basketball game? They did. On a boat. Yeah, yeah. And I think it was the Intrepid as well. Yeah, yeah. That's right. So, I mean, there's obviously the space to hold that number of people, but it, it also is kind of cool. I mean, to think about it, I'm going to go see a premiere of a movie on a ship, on an old battleship. This is going to be freaking awesome. And I won't give it away, but the Intrepid plays a huge role in the new battleship movie too. I won't say how. Did you see Battleship? I watched a street version of it. Yes. Okay. Like, I'm not paying for that movie. Okay. I did pay for that movie, $1.25 or something. I got five movies, four movies for five bucks. I'm like, okay. You're watching some guy's videotape and you're going down in front. Yep. That's what it was. It's one of those. It's like one of those Cosmo Kramer recordings. That's what it was. But, you know, the price was right. So I figured. For a buck and a quarter. I lived in New York for five years. I know all about that. Yeah, do what you gotta do. So many movies that I've seen for like three bucks because I would never pay more than that. Yeah. I mean, most of them aren't worth it. Right. Most of them are just garbage and crap. Are you going to go out and spend the $9 to go see yourself? Oh, definitely. Okay. Plus, I'm such a huge fan of the franchise and of the actors. I'm like, I'm excited for this. It's one of the rare ones that I'll pay for this summer. I mean, I'll pay for that. I'll pay for the new Dark Knight. I'll probably pay for the new Spider-Man just to kind of see what the reboot is. Okay. Is the guy who's playing the new Spider-Man the guy who played the Scarecrow in the Batman movies? I mean, yeah, in the most recent relaunches? I can't say that I know. Okay, because the only glimpse I've seen of his face makes me think that it's that same actor and it's just kind of, huh, that's kind of cool. Now he's played a supervillain. Now he's playing a superhero. He finally gets his superhero role. Apparently, everyone eventually gets their own superhero role now. I'm hoping. I wonder which one they can make you. Yeah. Hmm. Curry man. No. There is a curry man. There is a curry man. Amos Ressler. He's awesome. Part of what, like, when I left New York, a lot of my friends were like, well, the ones who weren't saying, oh, you're going to say, do you want fries with that? They're like, you know, like, how long are you going to give it? Which I found to be a peculiar question, especially by the time, like, I had been asked a few times by different friends, like, how long are you going to give it a try before you come back to New York? Was basically the implication because they know if I weren't there, I'd be in New York every place. And I understood the question. And it's not. It sounds mean spirited. Like, you're going to fail. You're going to be back. How long is it going to be? But it's not. I guess it's the right way to look at things. Like, you can't just be dawdling forever. But, yeah, I couldn't put, like, a cap on it. Yeah, like, in five years. If I had put five years on it, I would have missed Metro PCS by two months. Mm-hmm. So I'm glad I didn't do that. And then you would have missed the Clippers making it through the first round of the playoffs. Right? They probably wouldn't have. I mean, I'm a good fan. Like, I cheer at the right times. I'm quiet at the right times. You know, I'm not saying that I determined, like, you know, one or two of the games. But maybe four or five of them. I don't know. And, like, it's important to have smart fans and not be yelling while we're shooting free throws and definitely be yelling while they're shooting. You know, just little stuff like that. What's your take on Clipper Darryl? When I found out that he's not really a—and I don't know. I've never met the guy. But when I read that he's not a true fan, that, like, he does it for the attention or whatever, then I was like, all right, if he's abusing the name or if he's pretending to be something he isn't, then I can understand it. I'm going to keep him out. But it's not that big a deal, one. Two, the Clippers are owned by Hitler, I think. Like, anything they can do to avoid more bad press. Oh, man, he's an awful man. And I don't know him personally either, but based on everything I read, I tend to agree. So, like, when I— Any time that Slumlord is part of the description of who you are, like, that's not good. Whenever you're reading about someone and you read, like, three sentences into it, you start reading about, you know— You know, race problems he had with hiring people back in the 80s or whatever. I'm like— Whenever a man throws a humanitarian award and gives it to himself. Right. Year after year. Year after year. God, it's just— That's insane. Well, first, you know, we should say congratulations to him. But, yeah, no, that is— I don't want to say congratulations to him. I'm kidding. He didn't have anything. All he did was sign the paychecks. I think it's his— It's a complete joke. His GM did a great job of getting the people he got in. But, like, based on that, the embedded horrible press, just by everyone knowing— Who were owned. I was like, you know what? He's fun. I love when Clipper Darrell goes nuts. You know, and gets the whole crowd going. It's hilarious. Yeah, it's terrific. And, you know, it's a sporting event. It's entertainment. You know, like, when people take it a little bit too serious, oh, no, it's our team. No, it's not your team. He's our dancing homer. Yeah, yeah. And no one else there, other than maybe you and who you're sitting with, and maybe a couple of people, care if you lose your job tomorrow. As far as saying it's my team, you know, this stuff, there's a limit for that. And then the guy's fun. You know, like, what? Like, six, seven times a game, he'll bring it up, especially if it's a good game. And it gets the crowd going and stuff, and he's got a terrific outfit. Did you go to every home playoff game this year? I got a—no, I got a half season. The other way was for me to— It's still—this is one of those things that, when I look at it, I'm like, wow, I cannot believe this is my life. Like, season tickets isn't something I ever imagined being a factor in my life. Or, you know, whatever. But it's—the half season that I went to, I had so much fun with it, and when I was thinking about it for the next season, I was like, okay, next season's going to be 41 games, because it's going to be a full season. And, you know, that's quite a commitment, and it's going to be, you know, twice as much in the price and all this. So I didn't want to do that, so I did a half season again for next year, but it also gives you, you know, the ability to buy other tickets. Some playoff tickets. When they come available. When they come available. Right. Well, the half season already includes half of the home playoff games, but that's tricky because, like, mine was, I had the first and third home games in the first round, second and fourth in the second round. So fourth—third and fourth only happen if the series extends past five, and fourth could only possibly happen if you have home court advantage. So the two series that I had, two and four, at most I could have gotten two if they had advanced. So that was the unfortunate thing for the half season, but I don't care. It was fun. It was something I— I was able to afford last year. Hey, at some point, it'll work great in stand-up here in Los Angeles. So I am a Clippers season ticket holder. Not even stand-up. I want to be their Nicholson. I want to be their Jagdish Nicholson. Isn't that Billy Crystal? Yeah, Billy Crystal is who they got. No, but he's Billy Crystal. He's not their Nicholson. He's their Billy Crystal. Oh, okay. You know what I mean? Who's the Lakers' Billy Crystal? No, no. Who's the Lakers' Sid Veda? We don't really know him. Justin Timberlake. He was court side the other day. Yeah, because Justin Timberlake is as big a name as— As Sid Veda. Absolutely. Yeah, I can see that parallel. I dance better. Maybe a little bigger. Yeah. I'm sure that's true, that you're a better dancer. Well, no. I'm not going to prove it right now, but if you don't— It's for the radio. I mean, it's the theater of the imagination. So you're dancing right now in many people's minds, and it's beautiful. They can't see me doing the worm, but as you can see right now, when I do the worm, I do it backwards. Wow. Wow. Ow, ow, ow. Wow. You should be on American— American has got talent or something. I like that show. I finally found out what it takes for me to like reality TV. Howard Stern. Yeah, me too, man. He's been great on there this season. Yeah, he's funny. And he made a kid cry, and it was a touching moment. Yeah, I'm not cut out for this. That was pretty awesome. I'm glad to have seen it, because honestly, I used to be a huge Stern fan, listened to him every day when he was on regular radio. I haven't listened to him once since he switched over to satellite. So to be reacquainted with him has been a really nice surprise. It's been a good part of my summer so far. That's the exact same with me. Like, I haven't heard him since Sirius. And if I had to do that nightmare morning commute every day, I would probably, you know, I would have Sirius, and I would listen to him every day on the drive. But, you know, I'm lucky enough to be able to work from home, so I don't have to, you know, I don't have a drive with radio or whatever. So, you know, I didn't bother with Sirius. And, yeah, exactly. This is a good reminder of I did enjoy him. I've been a huge Stern fan since like the 80s. Not— Like, in the way that, like, when he says, when they do a bit or whatever that I find gross or just annoying, I'll just put it on a song, and then I'll come back in a little bit later. Whereas other people will call, oh, my God, he's horrible. He's the devil. But I actually, I used to coach at a summer camp in which two of his daughters were the campers. Cool. Yeah, yeah. And his oldest was so sweet. Like, just an adorable— I don't know if she was that sweet, but compared to the rest of her bunk, she was an absolute dream. So, like, I've used her— I don't use— I use her to defend Howard Stern for the last 19 years. Like, whenever, you know, he's got a lot of haters. And I'll be like, oh, whatever. He's either an amazing father or he's an amazing nanny hirer. Either way, I'd rather have more fathers like that guy. He's doing the right thing. Yeah, yeah. And he adores his kids. Like, that's evident even on the show and stuff. And, yeah, I think I have a lot of respect for that guy. Well, Sid, you are a man in demand, and we know you have to make it to something else right after us, an audition. A last-minute audition. I sincerely appreciate you accommodating me. No, we really appreciate you coming in. Like, we really do enjoy your presence, and we're going to try to trick you in here again sometime soon. I hope so. And hopefully we can get you out to do one of our live shows again, too. Oh, definitely. Yeah, definitely. Where can people learn more about you? Well, you know, the Internet. SidVeda.com? SidVeda.com, Facebook, my fan page, and Twitter. And then, well, I mean, if that's not enough, then— Oh, yeah. Go see him. Go see Men in Black 3, and don't blink. Please go out and buy it. Yeah, definitely go out and see it, because it's— From everything I've heard, the whole movie's hilarious, and from what I've seen, it's hilarious. And at the end of the film, when you really want a hot dog, like, it's going to be your fault. That's what I'm saying, right? Because, you know, and I know I sold it. Like, I haven't seen the cut yet, but, like, you know, I felt everything. We did, like, 20 takes. Let me leave you with this story. After, like, take 12 or so, when Tommy Lee Jones threatened to slap me, like, we were doing this thing, and it changed, like, it evolved throughout it, and we had to, you know, work on the blocking and stuff. So after a few takes, you know, I asked Mr. Jones, I was like, you know, I was trying to be polite. I was like, hey, man, where would you like me to deliver the sandwich so, you know, so they could seamlessly get past it and get over the cab? And he said, chest high. I was like, all right, cool, like basketball. And so we do this, and we're doing the scene a few times, and they had me putting on hot sauce on the sandwich. And I know me. I know, like, it's something I would think about. I want to be careful with that just because. I don't want to ruin the rest of my day if I, you know, if I get myself, you know, give myself a stomachache or whatever. So, you know, so I said to Mr. Jones, I said, would you like me to put the hot sauce on one end of the sandwich so you can take the bite? Because he was taking a bite out of the sandwich every single time he got to the cab. And I was like, would you like me to put it on one end so you can bite it out of the other? And he goes, listen, question guy, I got voices coming in from all over here. If I have to answer another question to you, I'm going to have to slap you. I froze. Will Smith let out this belly laugh that just made me feel like nothing. Like, man, they want me to leave now. I've been pretty sure Tom Lee Jones is like, yeah, this guy's got to go. Especially because, like, before, like, when they first came up, one of the PAs came up to me. Am I running over? No, you're doing great. No, you're fine. I'm more worried about your time than ours anyway. I sincerely appreciate that. When I got to set, one of the PAs came up to me and said, Will Smith wants to meet you. Which is a sentence. He said, Will Smith wants to meet you. Okay, so one of the PAs came up to me, Sid Veda, and said, Will Smith wants to meet you. Just wanted to make sure that we got that clear. I was like, if you can say that again, I want to record it. It's going to be my reel. Right? Like, it's the coolest, that might be the coolest sentence that has ever been uttered to me. So I'm waiting there, and I see him, and you can't really miss that. He's a tall dude. He's like six foot three. And eyes just gravitate to him. Like, I was in a room, I was in a hotel lobby once with the Reverend. Ran for president in 84. Jesse Jackson. Jesse Jackson, yeah. And, man, that guy just commands the presence of everyone in the room. Whether or not you like what he has to say, I don't care. Because, like, he's in the room, and everyone, like, you just grab him. And Will Smith was like that. He's just very dynamic in a very different way. It's not a political thing. It's just a likability thing. And, you know, and I look at him, and he walks up to me, and he goes, and, like, I was thinking to myself, okay, I don't want to gush. I've loved this guy his entire career since I was, like, 12. Like, you know, as far as a professional is concerned, like, I've read about how much good he does. Like, I love that guy, like, as far as an entertainer is concerned. I have so much respect for him in his career. And so I was like, I don't want to gush. So he said, hey, I'm Will. And I was like, hey, man, I'm Sid. It's really nice to meet you. I said it, I shook his hand, and I turned to the right. And then the guy to his left, who I didn't bother looking at, because why bother? Because he had a hat covering his face. He goes, uh, I guess I'm Tommy. And I turn around, I smack myself in the head, and Will Smith let out a belly laugh again. I was like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. Wow. I have so much respect for you. You have no idea. But, you know, by then, it's a little bit too late. And then, so, like, an hour later, when he's done with me, he's going to slap me. I'm like, I believe you. So I'm going to stop asking you questions. He's an intimidating dude, there's no doubt. You see the fugitive or something, like, that type of demeanor with him is going to stay with you the rest of your life. And no country for old men, and just all these, like, hard roles, you know? Like, well, he's, uh, I've never, like, even when he plays, even when he does anything comedic or, like, says funny things, like in the fugitive, he has a lot of funny lines. It's funny because it's coming from someone who, you know, he's a, you don't want to mess with, you know? And, you know, like, and I think, and I've come to notice that, you know, you can't, there's some things about your essence that you can't hide in all these characters. And he's had, what, a 30-whatever-year career. And, you know, like, who he is is just, he's an amazing actor. But, like, it's, we are seeing Tommy Lee Jones become someone else. But, you know, so when I'm meeting him, like, he's very intimidating, and, I don't know, I just felt bad. I felt bad saying anything to him, like, hi, or it's nice to meet you, or I'm a big fan, or anything like that. So, yeah, I just, I was... Yes, I'm sorry, Mr. Jones, I'm just completely and utterly intimidated by you at this point. So, please, don't slap me, and I won't ask any more questions, I promise. I promise. Exactly. Though, I will admit, and I don't mean this in an offensive way, it's better to be slapped by Tommy Lee Jones than by Will Smith. I doubt he's forgotten his Ali training. That's a big boy. There was a slapping story with Will Smith last week where he was, so he's on a press junket for Men in Black 3, and he's working the line, he's going down, and some jackass decides that he's going to try to kiss him a couple of times. It looks like he's going for the cheeks, but at the end, he's definitely trying to kiss Will on the lips, and Will did not like that much at all, to the point that he kind of gave him the pimp backhand slap across the journalist's face. He held back. He did hold back. I mean, if you want... You see how fast his arm goes, and then it kind of slows a little bit, and then he just kind of taps him with the hand. So, he could, he could have wailed on him. Knocked him out. And I'll tell you what, at first, I was like, I thought it might be a little bit of an overreaction, but then I'm thinking about it. Even if their lips, even if the corner of their lips touched at all, if I accidentally did that to a woman, she would have every right in the world. If someone accidentally did that to my sister, I'd be like, yeah, you better knock him in the nose. So, you know, I was thinking about it. I was like, it's unfortunate, but, and it's kind of funny. And that's what this whole dude's stick is. I mean, he tries to kiss people that don't really want to be kissed. So, he had to, be prepared for that. Really good that they give him press credentials. Yeah. Like, he only does this when he's on camera, I'm guessing. Oh, I'm sure. There's no point otherwise. No, but what I'm saying, what I mean is like, on other people's cameras. If he isolated Will Smith, and like, hey, can I ask you a question, and then kissed him, I'm pretty sure we wouldn't hear it from that guy. This is very true. Will Smith would be like, you're like, Frazier. I guess if he did slap you, if it was a bad slap, Tommy Lee Jones had smack shows, you're like, oh, you don't like the hot sauce? Womp, womp, womp, womp. Here you go. Enjoy that bite, sucker. No, I mean, the whole day, I was just like, not in awe, just like, kind of like, keep, I was observing. I was watching. Showing your respect by not like, getting up and getting too close. Yeah, I mean like, after the shoot, I remember, I was talking to Anjul, the other guy from the Metro PCS commercials, and he asked if I mentioned the commercials, and I was like, no, the day that I worked with Barry Sonnenfeld and Tommy Lee Jones. Okay, look, I don't know, but that seems kind of weird, like, does he ask you that of other people? Like, when you meet them, like, well, did you tell them about our commercials, or? No, no, no, no, it was something like this. Yeah, I understood, and I actually thought about it since then. I was like, yeah, I probably should have mentioned something, but the day that I worked with these guys isn't the day that I'm going to start bragging about my resume. Uh-huh. But, yeah, so I do kind of, I kind of wish I had said something or made it, I don't know, and they have kids, and maybe they like them or whatever, but, you know. Hi, my name's Sid Veda, and you may recognize me from all those Metro PCS commercials. Okay, Sid, I know that Christy's going to kick my ass if we don't get you out of here, so get out of here, go work, get yourself another role, come back and tell us about more of your adventures. Ladies and gentlemen, go check out SidVeda.com, follow him on Twitter, do everything you can to learn more about him. He's hilarious, and thank you so much for coming in. Thank you guys so much. I really enjoyed it. Yeah, next time, I enjoy talking to you guys. Dig it, man. Hey, we're going to go to our comedy break. This is Matty Goldberg, a former comedian, from the Comedy Store Belly Room. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back. Yeah. But I gave the big guy my sister and he fucked her real good. Two more things about me. I grew up in New York, but look at me. I am a huge Boston Red Sox fan. I didn't play one inning, okay? I just watch the game and I rub myself. They were cursed for 86 years. I thought something so amazing was going to happen when they made that last out. I thought like 50 naked virgins were going to come to my apartment and pleasure me with champagne. And it didn't happen. So I was like, what happens next? So I just got some booze. I got some bread. And I made a sandwich. I just want to say I love... This is the best time of day I'm drooling up here. This is the only time I smile and I should smile more because I have a nice smile scene. The problem is when I leave the club and I walk down the street, nobody knows who the hell I am. I take the subway home every night. I see all these beautiful girls. Sometimes I just get in their face. I'm just like, don't you know who I am? And I gotta be honest, the pepper spray does go through the glasses. You guys have been fucking awesome. Thank you very much. Yeah. All right, you're back with Grand Theft Audio Radio. This is Jake Belger. And I'm Brent Thoman. And Brent needs to turn his mic on, though. Sorry, I had to turn off that fan. So then I'm Brent Thoman. No problemo. Hey, man, I loved having Sid in here. That was awesome. He was great. So everybody, again. What a special secret surprise that he's actually in Men in Black 3. I know, man. I knew we had a new project coming out, but I was told it was kind of a secret, and I didn't know that's what it was. So that is effing badass. Okay, so I got two stories that I really want to cover with you before we lose you for the rest of the day. Story number one is there is a trend happening in comics now Mm-hmm. where they have decided that, you know, to be inclusive, you need to have gay characters. Right. And I guess it started back in the 1990s. It was the first real gay character. His name was... North Star. North Star. Yeah, he was part of the Canadian superhero team that would make appearances in different comic books. In fact, I think they had a series for a while. I don't know if they still do. But, yeah, North Star was the first openly gay comic book character that Marvel introduced. And, I mean, when they announced it at first, people were like, well, who could it be? Is it going to be a major character? When they announced that it was North Star, it's like it's a character that fans of the Marvel Universe will vaguely remember, but it wasn't like a major superhero. Mm-hmm. So it's like, oh, okay. And I believe I actually have a copy of the comic book in which he came out. Was that an X-Men? No, it wasn't an X-Men. I don't believe it was an X-Men. I don't remember which book it was, but... Because what they're doing now in X-Men is they are going to now have, the first gay marriage in comic books, and it's going to be in the uncanny X-Men number 51 that's due out on the 20th of next month. Uh-huh. And they're going to have him have a gay marriage ceremony in it. So he's going to be with the X-Men for that one. Okay, so North Star and his longtime gay boyfriend are going to be getting married. That makes sense because the X-Men are based in Connecticut, and that's one of the states that allows it. Uh-huh. So, anyway, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... Got you off there. No, it just seems like... I didn't think that he was part of it, like X-Men, and that part of that group of people. He is a mutant. Uh-huh. So that's... He... Most of the... The team that North Star was on was a Canadian mutant team. So there were crossovers with the X-Men on regular occasions, especially if they were, like, searching for the Sasquatch up in Canada and they needed to find him, they would go to the Canadian mutants for help. But... So it makes sense that he's going to be with the X-Men because he is a mutant, and it's quite possible that he's been on the team for a while. I don't know. I haven't really followed the comic book in quite some time. But, yeah, so North Star's getting married. Well, good for him, I guess. This isn't the first... This isn't the only gay character. For the last couple of years, Archie Comics, they introduced a gay character about seven years ago, a character named Kevin Keller, and he did not... did not go over very well in the kids... I would imagine not in the Archie comic world. That was a very straight-laced, kind of wholesome comic book. It's kind of surprising that they would attempt to do something like that. So that character kind of flopped? Yeah, did not go over well. Sounds vaguely familiar to what happened with Popeye several years ago when they made Olive Oil a feminist. Uh-huh. Many newspapers were like, look, we don't want to touch politics in our comics. What you're doing is politicizing. We're not going to run Popeye for a while. There was actually a couple newspapers that stopped running Funky Winkerbean this month because the whole storyline was about a gay couple who was trying to attend their high school prom together, and they decided that we're just not going to carry it. Like, conservative papers all across the country, like the Iowa Times-Dispatch decided that they weren't going to run it. Oh. More of like these smaller town plays. Well, if it can't play in Iowa. Word. There have been other gay characters as well. You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... You have... Gay characters as well. You have, like, Batwoman, who is like a side character in the DC universe to Batman. That is... She's been a lesbian character for a few years. That's not as exciting. Like, lesbianism versus gay is like... It's so much more accepted easily that it doesn't even make a difference to most people. No. It doesn't seem like it. But the big news then that came out... So after they... After Marvel announced that they were going to have this gay wedding, Marvel or DC announced that one of their major characters, like one of their really big ones, is going to come out this month as being gay. And this is part of that new... The new 52. I have no idea what the new 52 is. The new 52 is a massive relaunch of all of their lines. They've made, like, one big change to each one of their characters. Okay. To the point where, like, they've made... I guess there was a book where, like, one of the characters who was white before is now black. One of the characters who was a boy before is now a girl. I mean, pretty big changes. Okay. Each one of these characters gets their own remake, and that's the thing that's going to change on them. There's only a couple of characters left that they haven't touched for DC... Okay. ...that are considered major characters. So the speculation, and this is crazy, that it's either going to be Superman who is gay... Mm-hmm. ...or it's going to be Robin. Mm-hmm. I... There... Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. There's a little more speculation that it could also be Aquaman, which would be a little disappointing, like, if it was... He's a gay fish. Yeah, if it was just on that level. But I can't imagine, like, what that would do to the whole Superman mythos. I don't think it'll be Superman. I mean, that's a pretty big change for... That's too massive of a change, especially since... I don't know. I don't think... Since I haven't followed him in forever, I don't... Didn't he get married to Lois Lane? There was a wedding between Superman and Lois Lane. There was a wedding between Superman and Lois Lane. Or Clark Kent and Lois Lane, or... Uh-huh. And I thought there was an attempt at having a child, but I don't know what's going on. Well, this is kind of like reimaginings, then, of the whole universe. Though these are the rules that the character is supposed to, like, be under going forward. Hmm. Interesting. I could see it being Robin more than it being Superman, to be quite honest. When I thought about it, I thought, oh, well, it's probably gonna be Martian Manhunter because he hunts men. Yeah, yeah. Like, that wouldn't be a bad selection, either. At least that makes sense. I could even see the Green Lantern. That's a possibility, too. He's one of the people that has not had his... There you go. So there could be speculation that it could be the Green Lantern. I could really... First, I don't know why, but the Green Lantern character seems to be the one that could very easily take on that kind of a persona. But are there others that haven't had any major changes yet that are on that list? Yeah, nobody who's as big name as... As those three? As those three. Or four, because you said, Aquaman as well. Right. I can... If I had to wager money, I would guess Robin. Yeah. It just makes the most sense to me as him. He's a major character. Right. But he's a little bit on the side of being a major character. Like, I guess he's had a couple of his own books and his own series and stuff. Well, there have been multiple Robins. Uh-huh. So some of them have gone on to be other heroes. Some of them have gone on to be villains. But that's the one that, to me, makes sense. And again, I said, I would put Green Lantern as my number two. I think Superman's the lowest possible one to become homosexual. Here's the other three that are being suggested that have not been touched yet in the new 52. You have the Atom. Okay. You have B-Wanna Beast. I have no idea which character that is. I guess he's been introduced about seven, eight years ago and he's caught on with kids a lot. And they've had Shazam. Huh. Now, Shazam, I think... That's tough because he's a kid. He's a kid, yeah. So, like, that would be a pretty weird direction for them to go. Now, what if they did decide to make it lesbian and they went with, like, Wonder Woman? That wouldn't surprise me at all. She comes from the island of the Amazons. I mean, it's an island of nothing but strong, tall, beautiful, leggy, busty women. How could that not be the ideal? I mean, and... So she hasn't been touched on either so far. Uh-huh. Very, very possible. They could be her... It does make sense with Robin's name being Dick Grayson. You know, like, it's a possibility. What about if it is, like, a side person, like a Jimmy Olsen or an Alfred or... But again, you're talking about major characters, but... But you know who those are. Marvel also said that Northstar was a major character and when the announcement came out of who it was, we were all just like, well, I guess he's kind of a major character. If you... I lived in Canada and collected that comic book. Mm-hmm. So... Well, I'll have to look into that. I'll have to touch on some old comic book connections and see what the talk around the water cooler is. If this comes together, I wonder if you could get the guy who runs House of Secrets. I might be able to get one of the two of those guys in here. If not both of them, see what they think about the whole thing. They'd probably be fun to have it anyway. I believe so, too. Like, we should make that a point of trying to get after them. I'll get... I'll put some calls in, see what we can do. That'd be cool, man, because it's been so many years since I've seen those dudes. Like, I remember they used to tempt me with all the new Star Wars things. Mm-hmm. If it hadn't been for them, I probably wouldn't have gotten back into it nearly as hard as I did. Right. Okay, last funky news story before I lose you today, man. There was a man who was arrested this week for DUI. Hilarious, right? I mean, that just happens all the time. Always. So boring. Who really cares? Well, here's... Why you should care. In the front seat of his car with him was a zebra. He was driving around drunk in a car with a zebra with him. This was in Iowa. How... Okay. Where the... Did he go to... Yeah, where the fuck did you get a zebra in Iowa? I don't even know. You have to literally... You have to go to a zoo and rob the zoo or some petting zoo, man. I can't... Actually, I don't think you can even pet zebras. They're still wild animals. So... And what kind of... What car was he driving? He was driving a little pickup truck. Apparently, he tried to go out drinking even more, and he was bringing his... He also had a parrot with him. So he had a parrot and a zebra. He tried to bring his parrot and a zebra into the restaurant, but the owner wouldn't let him inside because they're selling food inside, and you can't have animals inside of a place that you're selling food. He must really be looking forward to Madagascar 3. He's just starting his own little zoo of them. He had a blood alcohol level of .2. Wow. That is... Okay, so that's three times the legal limit, and you're bordering on alcohol poisoning at this point. They did get an interview with the guy's girlfriend, and she said that the animals are like their children and that they just love going along for car rides. They're part of his family, and we never leave them alone in the car, not even for a second. Well, as well, you shouldn't because they'd probably, like, eat your seatbelt or something because... I don't know what a zebra eats, but I'd imagine they're probably, like, goats. I mean, they probably... Probably there's nothing really trustworthy to leave around a zebra. Yeah. That's just... And a parrot. I mean, it's like a... Did he walk in with a parrot on his shoulder and a zebra in tow to try and get into the restaurant? That's what I'm imagining. If he didn't, fuck that guy. You should totally do that. In fact, why weren't you riding the zebra in in a pirate costume with the pirate on your shoulder? There is no way that guy wouldn't have let you in because you're an invading pirate at that point on the back of a zebra. You'd be afraid. You're like, yes, sir. You can eat anything you want. Just please don't sick your wild animals on me. So, a zebra, a parrot, and a moron walk into a bar. So, you can't be served here. Then you get busted for drunk driving. You know what? They say they love these things like they're their children. Driving around with a .24 alcohol level is not what you do to children you love. Right. So, maybe you need to rethink where your whole thing comes from. I mean, these animals take special care and special food. Like, I don't know what... Like, I don't know. Like I said, I don't know what a zebra eats, but I can't imagine it just eats horse chow or whatever it is that we feed their horses. Probably leaves and grass and probably mostly whatever they feed a horse. Dude. Okay, look. Let's see on animals for a second. How long do you have? About two minutes or so? Okay. So, I have to kill an animal. I don't know what else I can do. Like, I have to call animal control or something. I got to do something. I have a raccoon who has decided that he is not afraid of me. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. He jumped down off of the roof yesterday about two feet in front of me and started making like a... The barking noises that they make. Yeah. That's an angry raccoon. Yeah. You need to call animal services. Yeah. I need to do something about this because I ran, dude. First thing you should look into is find out if there is some kind of repellent for these kind of animals that you might be able to spray around your house and your yard. And if that doesn't work, then call out animal control the next time he jumps down. Yeah. Yeah. I'm scared of like my wife going out there at night and doing laundry or something and having to decide, fuck this. I think that it's hungry. Yeah. It's a very bold animal who, if you're in its territory, it basically thinks your house is his right now. Yeah. I mean, I ran up to the, you know, my backyard. I ran up. I went through the door. The light was still on. I thought that the light would like keep them away. Like they don't usually like to come up into the light. Right. No, this one didn't give a shit. He ran towards the light. He ran towards the light and I got, I closed the door and I'm looking out the big window on the back window and the back door and it's just staring up at me. And I'm like, okay, I'm just going to sit here and watch this raccoon for a second. And it goes over and it pulls an avocado off my tree and it comes back and it just kind of stands there balancing on the avocado, staring at me as it tears this avocado apart with all four. That's right. I'm eating your avocados. This is what I'll do to your skull is what I was thinking. Oh no. And that pit inside his whole brain. Yeah. Not good. No, scary, scary. Scary indeed. So hey, we're going to lose you for the rest of the day. Yeah. Unfortunately, I got to go off and do my day job. Special assignment is what we call it. My special assignment of the day. Yeah. Special assignment. Have you seen today's assignments? Yes. Special assignment. So we'll catch you on the other side, dude. Great show today. Thank you. Same with you. Really glad Sid was able to come in and look forward to having him in again. And hopefully in one of our upcoming live shows because he's a very funny standup too. Yeah. So we'll work on that. So thanks for listening, everybody. I'll see you tomorrow or I'll talk to you tomorrow, I guess. That is probably true. Later, Jake. Catch you later. And I'll be back after this. Junk it. Okay. Cool, man. Dig it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. You are listening to Grand Theft Audio Radio with Jake Belcher. And only Jake Belcher. This isn't really Grand Theft Audio Radio anymore. This is a little segment we get to do once a week or so, maybe twice a week, called Jake Belcher's Headband Radio. Uh-oh. What the hell? What the hell, damn guy? Not even sure why that happened. Doesn't even make any sense to me. Okay, let's see what's important to me today. I guess I'm looking forward tonight to the finale of American Idol. The competition show last night was awesome. It was a total blowout, in my opinion. There's two people there. There's Jessica Sanchez, who's this little Asian girl from Chula Vista, California. And then there's one of my new personal favorites. A musician, a guy named Phillip Phillips. By me saying that he's one of my new favorites, I guess you gotta think that I'm probably rooting for him. Well, you're right. Last night I spent my time dialing up and calling in and trying to do everything I could to make sure that Phillip wins. Because he totally deserves it. And Jessica is boring. And she doesn't do anything at all that's exciting to me. It's like listening to some little kid sing some song that they don't really understand. It's like having to go to a high school. Or she calls his friends. the kid can sing and it's good but there's no heart there's no passion to it you watch this guy philip phillips and he just uh gets it going he has amazing um depth to his performances and to his soul and um i can't wait to see somebody that i actually want to see win win one of these competitions whoever i really like that person never wins a couple years ago i really liked casey and he got knocked out with like five or six weeks to go um i liked james durbin last year and he got knocked out with five or six weeks left to go and it's never somebody who i think actually has any talent that wins it's always somebody who can stand there and sing the big ballad or somebody who can stand there and make country folk happen happy it's been a couple years of um country folk i didn't even know if you're watching american idol this year they've got this song that they play during the goodbye portion all the time i didn't even know that it was from last year's winner scotty mccreary he came on to the show this week to perform it and it was just so sad like somebody that doesn't mean that much to you and isn't that important for their big song to be please remember me like please remember me i'm just like uh no i'm not i'm not gonna remember you scotty mccreary uh the dude with a messed up face you know how you can tell he had a has a messed up face during last night's show lots of long shots from him nothing tied up on his face they don't want to show that um that mug on tv if they don't have to about the closest they got the closest they got to his face you can still see his shoes in it so that tells you that they are not going out of their way to make sure that um that you get to see what a good looking guy scotty mccreary is because um the fact is it's just not man so that's bouncing around in my head today i guess other things bouncing around in my head um awesome story yesterday uh one of those things where you just wish that you could do this yourself but when you hear about something else doing it it just uh it just makes it that much more awesome out of seattle washington there was a washington state man who was so fed up with a group of like noisy moviegoers who were behind him that he stepped over the seat and he punched a 10 year old boy in the face the man who was watching the police uh who's watching the movie um he was watching titanic in 3d with his girlfriend and he had asked the people sitting behind him to hey please stop stop being so loud and stop throwing your popcorn but they just laughed at him the dude is quoted as saying that i just got so mad that it just happened how do you get so mad that you punch a 10 year old in the face this guy wasn't that old himself he was 21 years old um which is still in some ways a little bit more than what he was supposed to be but he was still a little bit more a kid i mean you haven't really developed all your reasoning and coping skills at that point which obviously this guy needs some help on if you decide that the best action is to punch a 10 year old in the face to the point that the 10 year old lost a tooth and had a bloody nose and um that's just awesome it's just it's awesome and it's awful at the same time i like things that are both like that it's like peanut butter and chocolate or um salt and pepper or me and my wife i mean things that go great together awesome and awful so lost a tooth um bloody nose the guy had to spend a night in jail um though he is having to come back into court tomorrow where he could be sentenced to up to three to nine months in jail it totally makes sense i mean he uh you can't just assault somebody like that especially a kid i mean there is no um there's no way to do that i mean there's no way to do that i mean there's no way to no um justification for it it's i have such strong mixed feelings on both of them because sometimes a kid can just fuck with you and fuck with you and you just you don't even want to deal with it you just want to be like oh my god i want to punch his kid in the face i have so many um little kids that when they come around me i'm like a jungle gym i'm a big guy i mean most most people out there don't know this but i'm about six foot probably 250 or so and I'm very cordial and congenial with the kids. I try to deal with them on a level that I would want to be dealt with. So that leads kids then to be really overly familiar with me and climb all over me and to poke at me and things that they're just trying to get a rise out of me or something. But, you know, I put up with it. I like it. I like kids. But every once in a while, you just get that one little bastard. He's like, oh, my God, I want to punch this kid in the face. I want to punch him in the face. But you don't do it because you have like this thing called, oh, my God, what's it called? It's kind of like sounds a lot like conscience. It probably is conscience. Yeah, let's just go with that because you have a conscience. You don't actually rear your hand back and decide to punch someone in the face. I mean, sure, this guy told the kids to be quiet. The kids quieted down. But then apparently they started whispering things from the other side. And that was enough for Kim to jump over the seat. He took one of the kids drinks, flung it in his face, glee style, and punched him in the face. When the police came out and they talked to him, he said something to the effect of, you know what? I paid a lot of money to see this movie. That's just like, like, that's an excuse. Like, I paid $13. So obviously, if you paid $13, like everyone around you should have to be quiet. I'm not sure if that's really the way that it works. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I went to a experience where I sat through a movie and had a growling dog right behind me. I complained to the theater staff who never got into the theaters. They never came in and they checked anything out. And I was told that unless I witnessed the animal doing something that was wrong, they couldn't do anything about it. I should have punched that dog in the face. That's one thing that people don't do. People don't punch animals that much. You may see someone. Like kick an animal or something. Or throw a rock at an animal. It's very rare that you see somebody punching an animal. I always liked those old cartoons of like Brutus or Bluto, whatever his name was, from the Popeye cartoons. And like they'd be in a horse race or something. And Brutus or Bluto, whatever his name was, would jump out ahead of Popeye. And Popeye would drink his, eat a spinach. Mmm. And the spinach makes me da-da-da-da-da-da-da-brung-brung. Then he puts up the big biceps and he's got the big heavy arms. And he starts running really fast. And he runs up and he punches the horse. And the horse goes, ooooh, and falls to the ground. Like I always liked those. But you never see it in real life. You never see somebody like punching a dog or a monkey or a horse or a camel or a goat or a dolphin or an octopus or a whale. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. or a camel, or a goat, or a dolphin, or an octopus, or a whale, or a zebra, or a bird, or a cat, or a mouse, or a hamster. You never see any of these animals get punched. I mean, sure, like I said, sometimes you may see somebody kick one, but never a bunch. But honestly, you probably should have knocked all three of these kids out, so they could do what they're supposed to do when a movie like Titanic is playing. Sleeping. Because that movie is boring as hell, except for like the seven minutes when the boat's going down. You sit through this whole long thing, it's like three hours long or something, and you think, oh good, at least, it's got to be like two, three hours of good craziness. And you start watching it, and it's all like, oh, I love you, and I love you too, and like, you're poor, and you're rich, and it's just, this keeps going on, and on, and on. A little bit like the segment. On, and on, and on, and there's hardly any action in it at all. And the big thing is like somebody trips over like a hose or something that's on the deck. Ooh, that's amazing. Okay, I know it's not that bad, but it is pretty close. Obviously, this did not happen down here in LA. One thing you have to get used to in LA is people just talk during the movies. People bust out their phone, and they take phone calls, and they got that screen all lit up so that they can talk with their friends. It's really annoying. It's one more reason that why even go to the theater? And for the most part, I am normally against violence. But sometimes a dude's just got to be a dude and straighten a situation out with a fist. I mean, this guy, I'm not going to say he's like my hero, but at least he like put the fear of God back in this stupid kid who, I mean, is trying to ruin this experience. He was just being a little dickhead. Maybe this kid will be traumatized enough to think twice before being a jerk, and maybe he can go out and obtain some manners. If it was up to me, I would give this man a jury trial, and we would make sure that he walked. Not enough justice out there against kids. Our whole society has just been so, oh, it's for the children, and oh, you have to do the right thing for the kids, and oh, you have to do what's, like, it's all about, about the next generation and leaving the world in a better place. No, it should be about us. Not about children, because children are the future. In the future, they're the ones who get to figure out their problems and have their good times. But for now, zip it. Shut the fuck up. Don't throw popcorn over my head and try to taunt me, because I'm going to take a lesson for this guy, and I'm going to punch a little kid in the face. If he... tries to mess with me like this. Now, violence isn't always the answer, no matter how enticing I'm making it sound. Though there was a story that came out yesterday that I can totally get behind the violence in this until they took it a little bit too far in the end. There was a group of 18 people who were dressed in black, wearing masks and wielding, like, steel batons and hammers. They claimed to be extreme anti-racists. They allegedly stormed a... a suburban Chicago family restaurant to assault a meeting of alleged white supremacists. Ten people were injured and at least three required treatments for head wounds as a result of the attack Saturday at the Ashford House Restaurant in Tinley Park, Illinois, which is, like, a really quiet Chicago suburb. The restaurant has sustained $15,000 in damages, including broken plates, glasses, and furnitures. So, you know, I feel bad for them. I feel bad for the restaurant, but I guess if you are holding a meeting there of white supremacists, then maybe you kind of get what you get. Five of the attackers have now been caught and have been charged with aggravated battery, mob action, and criminal damage to a property, which are all felonies. There's a couple of brothers and a couple of cousins who were caught. They were going after a group of guys called the Illinois European Heritage Association a group linked to the white pride group Stormfront. These victims were also caught up in the police investigation following the incident. They were, wow, a couple of the guys there after they, wow, that's crazy, a couple of the guys were caught and they were searched and on them they were arrested for having possession of child pornography and unlawful possession of a firearm. Um, man. Who travels around with child porn on them? That's not gay like... So these guys are allegedly racist, allegedly pedophiles. I mean, if you have child porn, you're a pedophile. I mean, that's just the way it goes. And they have unlawful firearms on them. It's kind of like whatever happens to you in that situation is whatever happens to you in that situation. I may start trying to start a fund up for this Tinley Park Five as they're being called and helping them out. I don't know. I don't know their bills here because these are the right type of people to go after. So what happened apparently? They caught this whole thing on Savannah's camera. You see that a door opens up. About 15 to 18 people walk in and they've got hoods on and they've also got masks covering their face. While the confrontation itself happens outside of the camera's view, you can see tables flying through the sky, through the air, food spilling, all over the floor. You see them marching in and out and you see some of the waiters taking swings at them. So, oh man, that's, that's, pardon me, that is crazy. So you go in there to fight the white supremacists and you get to fight the waiters too. These waiters feel that they had to defend the restaurant and make sure that nobody messed with their tips that day. I don't know, man. That's, that's a funky, funky story. I'm not sure what to make of this whole thing. I bet we retouch on this tomorrow because knowing who our guest is going to be, which we're not supposed to say, then I'm sure that we're going to cover it. It is a little bit surprising, like when you read some of the comments on these stories, how happy people are about this. I mean, this is an unprovoked attack. I guess they think it's justified because they are pretty sure that these people are going to be in trouble. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if these people are racist, but I mean, if this happened to a black or Latino group, it couldn't be the same thing. You couldn't go into like, okay, who's a racist black group? The NAACP. I mean, you can't go into a meeting of the NAACP and start beating people up because if this happened to them, there would, this would be, there'd be an outrage. It would be the worst thing that ever happened in America. It's like a human desire for destruction and control is almost impossible to overcome. almost as strong as the desire to mate. No matter the cause of the race, people just want to break stuff. People don't know how to act anymore. The facts are that hate comes in all colors. And how dare these people decide to be intolerant to someone else's intolerance. I've really gone off the rails on this one. I'm not even sure what the hell I'm talking about anymore. Which is okay. These are just the things that bounce around in my head. And it is definitely up there in my brain today. I guess we're getting close to the end of the show. I do want to remind people to go to facebook.com forward slash Grand Theft Audio and be able to like the show there and learn like prizes and things that you can win for listening and about future upcoming guests. We got some pretty big ones coming up now. People we are allowed to talk to. Next Friday, the star of the new movie Piranha 3DD. Mr. David Koechner is coming in. Totally excited by that. Wednesday, we have Doris Roberts who was the mother on Everybody Loves Raymond. And she was also the secretary on one of my favorite shows, I Loved Remington Steele. That show was awesome. And I can't believe that we're getting her live in studio. She is a great actress. She is a great actress. She is a great actress. She has been doing it for so long. Her spending some time with us is super, super stoked. I'm very excited by that. I guess that kind of ends it for today. And thanks for listening. You guys get a chance. You can go on something and tell everybody that you love us the most. So this is Jake Belcher for Brent Thoman saying have a great day and we will catch you tomorrow. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.