Comedic monologue about dick jokes and audience interaction

Y'all are about to win the election as the worst fucking audience I've ever faced. Ever, ever, ever. It's alright. It's alright. It's alright. Listen, folks, here's the deal. I know you're getting concerned. Let me assure you right now, there are dick jokes on the way. Relax. I'm a professional. here's the deal I editorialize for 40 minutes the last 10 minutes we pull our chutes and float down to dick joke island together okay and we will rest our weary heads against the big purple thick vein trunks of dick jokes and we will sit in our comfy beanbag scrotum chairs and giggle away the dawn like good American audiences okay penis jokes are coming up relax I understand what country I'm in