Episode

Where the brothers in the hood reshuffle us So I rest the fence on my ligaments Pistol grip up on my lap Riskin' it for life Givin' it, never givin' it back Too late for slippin', so slack Up on my lap, it's on your lips So trap shot, a steel dick walk Flick for punk butt All I'm sayin' ain't no question who the man is Am I civic or is this sherpies? Nope. Can you hear me? Yeah, I can hear you now. Can you hear me? Can you hear me? It was on. Can you hear me? Summer breeze makes me feel fine, yeah. Some guy just at the bar said, they played it out on the radio, he said that was the first song he ever got laid to, Summer, 1976. Seals and Croft, Summer Breeze. Full house, CJ Robinson here. Hello. I don't know why I hit that one. And back for the first time in months, Brian Ingalls. I'm glad to be back, everybody. I'm glad to be back. Everybody. Where are the white women at? Wild Card Weekend. First of all, Happy New Year, fellas. Happy New Year. CJ, I know you've been saying that since Thanksgiving, for Christ's sake. See you next year. See you next year. Wild Card Weekend. Glad you're here, Brian Ingalls. Hey, I missed you guys. I'm fired up about the Cowboys, and not in a good way. And just think about this. For a minute there, I was actually pulling for the Cowboys because of the UF Recon Connection, and you got me going, and all that, but I was so anti-Cowboy today. Especially seeing fat freaking Christy up there fucking chugging down donuts and hugging your boy, Jerry Jones. That guy, if you're in New Jersey, what the fuck is this guy constantly doing? Is he flying on his private jet? Is Jones there picking him up? Or is he putting his fat ass just on a regular plane? Not just that, but why isn't he pulling for the Jets or the freaking Giants? That's his constituents. The goddamn Cowboys. They both play in New Jersey. I think after a certain year, like a certain age, you have to pull for the team where you live. You know, I can see when you're a little kid, you'd be like, yeah, you know, I'm a Raider fan, and I live in Boston, whatever. Would you ever pull for the Lakers? No, never. Well, you got me. Conundrum. Well played. No. Well, I would pull. I'll tell you what. The teams, although the announcement was made, no L.A. teams coming next year. And all the old diehard L.A. guys out here are like, I'll believe it when I see it. You know, I guess they're right again. It's true. Yeah. We will have to see. We will have a better tram and public transportation system before we get another team here in L.A. It's going to be next year, CJ. Yeah. It's going to be next year. Bullshit. They came out with that announcement again. I would pull for a team if it came to L.A., except when they play the Patriots. Kid, Cowboys, sure lost that game. They should have, man. I thought they were going to lose that game. I was watching it on my couch, you know, nude as usual, and I was like, fuck, man. We're not going to get this game. But, dude. The fate is changing for them, so hopefully it goes on. But they got a couple lucky calls. Yeah. Well, first of all, I think that's good defense, but I, you know, have a high school, college background. But with the letter of the law for the NFL, that was fucking pass interference. Never got his head around. Yeah, that was, I've never seen anything picked up like that before. Right. They called it. They called it out. They made the announcement, and then they picked it up. I had never seen anything like that before. Do you think that has to do with how they're saying that all these refs haven't worked together before? A jigsaw crew? Yeah. I mean. Why would they even do that? I don't know. A jigsaw crew? Yeah, it's guys who don't, usually they work together. That makes sense. I just never heard that expression before. Yeah. It's interesting. Yeah. They take these guys. He made the announcement of the penalty, and then they pulled the freaking flag. But the second flag is, your boy Des Bryant out at the hash mark with no helmet on, screaming bloody murder. That should have been a penalty as well. And when Murray scored a touchdown, he took off his helmet in the end zone. Nothing. No. I'm just saying that. I thought that was against the rules. Yeah. I was sitting at the bottom. The guy's like, oh, it's money. I'm telling you. Jerry Jones is paying him off. No fucking way. During that game when that was going on, one of my friends sent me that video of the director of referees. I remember getting off the bus with Jones, and he's like, this is why they're getting away with this shit. So people think that they do that, but I highly doubt that's true. No way. Couldn't be true. Build them up high so they fall even farther. If that even happened. Thanks for the insight. Very Zen-like. You still sick over the kid. I'm afraid the next person uses that microphone. I'm not sick. Yeah. I just have a cough. Yeah. I'm telling you, everybody's fucking sick. It's the Ebola, Danish Ebola that I brought back with me. You're just burnt out, Ingles, but everyone else is sick. That's true. Rock star. No, really. Anywhere you go, people are freaking sniffling and shit. Sitting next to Keith Moon over here. Yeah, really. No, we don't want to get in his exploits. We don't want to get in his exploits. But, kid, are you going to be selling this fight? You're not going to sell this hashtag finish the fight shirt? I bet we won't even get time to print that thing. They were making a big deal about it today. Yeah, unless they, I mean, people are going to want it in the cowboy team stores. That's where it's going to go first. Then it'll trickle all down to the peons like myself. By the way, in this, wait a minute, I thought you were like executive fucking vice president of soft goods. No, no, no, no. Low peons. How it works is all this shit's got to get printed. So the presses are going right now and they're probably cranking them. And then they go, they go out on UPS to all 39 team stores, the stadium, and then they're going to ship, you know, expedite the shit to Dick's and I don't know. What'd you call me? You know, wherever else. All these other, all these other national change sports authority. That's where they'll get them by Wednesday if that's the case. Speaking of which, you said you were going to bring in some goods so I could bring in my brother. Go ahead and kill me, you cocksucker. Bro, did I, I called you and I have the shit. I just forgot at this time, but it was the show that you didn't tell me you canceled. So I showed up at home. I told, I told my brother the whole time. I'm like, yeah, yeah, my buddy works for the Cowboys. I'm going to bring you some cowboy gear. if we do the show next week, I'll bring it. I have it sitting in a bag. Dude, why does your brother want cowboy gear? Exactly. He's exactly the argument I made because he grew up in, you know, he's a little bit older. He grew up in Dallas? Exactly. He's a Patriot fan. Big fan of Chris Christie too, I bet your brother is. He's a Patriot fan, but he, you know, he's a cowboy enthusiast. A lot of people of a certain age, like you like to steal this. You know, it's the steals and Cowboys over the Steelers. They were tied. Thank God the Steelers lost. a playoff game though? Wild card? Isn't it just, Oh yeah. It's a playoff game for a playoff game though. If you want to look at it that way, but yeah, it's a playoff game, Kenny. I'm glad, speaking of steals, I'm glad they lost. Sorry, CJ. Not really at all. They're the most obnoxious, third most obnoxious fan base other than the Cowboys and the Patriots. Where do you get that from? Cowboys, Patriots, Steelers, observation. Yeah. Daily living, watching people drive. Where do you know Steelers fans? I know, plenty of Steelers fans. Oh, we're out here in California and you're saying there's plenty of Steelers fans. Well, there's got to be a reason for it. Well, because they were, them and the Cowboys were America's team in the 70s. Well, the Cowboys are not America's team. There's a Steelers bar across the street from my house and there's always a bunch of ugly ladies out there in their Bubby Brista jerseys smoking cigarettes. Look like Bubby Brista. Yep, yep. So I'm going to hit that place up on the way back. And they all have mullets. I don't care what anyone says. I think the Ravens are pretenders. I don't fucking care. The narrative is, the narrative is, oh, the Ravens know how to beat the Patriots. Give me a break. Like it's fucking doing the Rubik's Cube. Like they're just going to come out there and turn a couple of things like, oh, we got them beat. The game was so much fluid. So we played them, they played us three times at home. That one year, I don't know, six, seven years ago, they blew us out like 28 points in the first quarter. I remember. Then we won by the kicker missing the kick. Yep. And then they ended up winning the third one, right? And that's when they went and they won the Super Bowl. So I guess that's two, two wins versus one loss, right? For us? It doesn't matter. That shit is all in the freaking ancient past. Yeah, exactly. But I don't, yeah. Okay, I got you. Speaking of ancient past, I can't believe Terrell Suggs, Terrell Suggs, gets a free pass. And I was just reading this the other day. I knew he beat up women, you know, that that was standing for the course, but I know what he was doing. He took his fiance, she's been his fiance for like 10 years, held her down, poured bleach on her, kicked her in the, in the face and broke her nose in 2009. Okay, and then in 2012, same woman, punched her in the face and dragged her from a car. Same woman. And that guy never, any suspensions, nothing. Now I can't, I guess you can't do it posthumously, whatever, you know, not the right word, but later on. But that fucking scumbag should be freaking, people should be picking in that motherfucker. Especially when they forced those no more commercials down our throat, which drive me nuts. Yeah. Do you think those guys, by the way, are pretending to cry or pretending to act emotional? They're acting. Well, there's the one with all the football players. You think like Eli Manning and Chris Carter and all these guys are, this is just like a, What do they say to them? They show them like that commercial with all the puppies that are all locked up and everything like that? They're acting. You know? They're all fucking acting. I can see like Fiona Apple getting all teary eyed because she's in the, the actor version of that. Yeah. I can see her getting all teared up because she's like the last one, right? With the tattoos on her. Yeah. That's Fiona Apple. I don't think so, but yeah. Yeah. I was like, dude, how'd they find her? All right. Yeah, exactly. I'll give one of you a hundred bucks if in the next 10 minutes, we'll continue on the show in the next 10 minutes, you can make yourself cry. A hundred bucks. You can't even produce tear glands, man. Let's see the money. Let's see the money. No, I haven't. I'm taking your question, my freaking, I just got back from Chris's vacation. My mother just gave me like 500 bucks. I'll cry for you, Flemming, coach. My mother's giving me money. I have money to spend. I'm well, I'm wealthy. She gave you $5 in your birthday card this year. Yeah. Yeah. You have a sweater. Oh, I just got back from home and gained 35 pounds. You look a little fat. Thanks. That's because I am. Spending New Year's Day in Nashua, New Hampshire with a bunch of cretins. Nashua. Watching the games. The games are good. How's Slushy's place? Slushy, well, he's locked out. He freaking hitched on with the divorcee and now he's living large in some kind of split entry home. He's living in his home in Nashua better than he's ever going to live in his life. With a guy or girl? A guy. Oh. I don't want to give out names. Good guy. Good guy letting Slush live with him, but yeah. Up in the middle of Nashua. Actually, Nashua's not that bad, I guess. I wouldn't want to live there. But watching those games on New Year's Day, the bowl season in general, first of all, I want to fist fight anybody who says there's too many bowls. Okay? Anybody who says there's too many bowl games is a fucking idiot because I want more bowl games because it's nice to me for a fucking football game to be on at one o'clock Tuesday. You know, why wouldn't you want more bowl games? So what do you think about the game that's on tonight? You think that's all good? The games that were on the second? What's that? Arkansas State? Arkansas State? Like, you don't need these shit games still going on. Why not? I guess you do. I mean, What would you rather watch? I know you're a big, like, breaking bad fucking walking dead guy, which most people are. You know what I mean? That's a thing. but I don't know. Just, I guess it's good for the kids, so that's all that counts. Yeah, it's good. It generates, it's money. Money in the community. Fun games to watch. Well, I don't know about fun games to watch, but even the games, like, I don't know if you watch that Central Michigan Western Kentucky game on Christmas Eve day. Did you watch that? Fucking great. That razzle dazzle play at the end of the game. Oh, and then they go for two, which I don't mind. Yeah. They throw a fade route, like a jump ball. It's, you know, coaching. Here you go. Just throw it up in the air. When are you guys going to catch it? The whole season's on the line. Okay, throw it up there as high as we can. Great fucking, great coaching. Oh, let's talk about the playoffs, though. Florida State game to watch it. Ingles. Yeah, yeah, it was awesome. It was a great game. Not only that, I just think the Rose Bowl on TV looks fucking awesome. Yeah. Just the kind of pageantry that comes with it, it really does look great. And the parade was well done this year. Yeah. Did you go? Yeah. Did not go to the parade, no. Been before? You probably marched in, huh? I've been in the parade. I was one of the Eagle Scouts carrying the banners. Yeah. And I was actually on the front banner. Really? Yeah. What year was that? 84. Who was the Grand Marshal, remember? No clue. Who played in the game? No clue. Best color man in the business. I tell you what, though, the Rose Bowl was probably the single reason why I don't think I'd ever move back because if I was living in Nashua, and I'm looking at the Rose Bowl, the San Gabriel Mountains and shit, and looking at the fucking 20 degrees outside, the fucking sunshine out there, I'd be like, I made a mistake. It's great advertising. I made a mistake. Yeah, I guess that's what I mean. It looks, looks awesome, but fuck man, Oregon looks like they're playing in another orbit, man. Yeah. The best team by far. Yeah, I've thought that for the last several months. They beat a team who were what, 28, 29 and 0 going into this game? Classless motherfuckers. Florida State, you see the whole team walk off at the end without even shaking hands. Yeah, and then their fans supposedly keyed their cars and slashed their tires. Keyed their tires, slashed their tires. That's great. I love Florida. I know, right? And speaking of Nashua, we were in a bar in Nashua, and those Southerners always fucking peek their heads up like us freaking assholes. Some guy in there like, oh, and the whole time like, that's how we play ball in the South. Just sitting in a fucking bar in the middle of fucking Nashua talking about how they play ball in the South. But that's, you know, it's just ridiculous. How about the chant at the end of the game, the Oregon, no means no. It's pretty funny. Yeah. It is funny. I don't think it's anything bad, but I do think it's funny. It is a little bad, you know, especially in light of all this, you know, you know, no means, not no means no, but no more, you know, to make fun of rape. But the guy didn't rape her. Straight up. Jameis Winston didn't rape that girl. He's been raped over the coals more time than, you know. I heard some of her testimony. It sounded pretty graphic, man. I don't want to say that it just seemed like it's hard not to believe her after you hear what she had to say, but I guess it can go either way. Well, he got found not guilty by like some kind of tribal council that didn't even need to like have, like I could see a court of law is different. It's like reasonable doubt. You're always going to get the people in the jury room would be like, that's reasonable doubt. It's reasonable doubt. But this kangaroo court in Florida State, you would think they would be a little bit more like, you know, guilty. I don't know. I don't think he fucking, I don't think he raped her. I don't know. He didn't. But that was, that was precious though. His fumble there was hilarious. He just kind of threw it, flailed back. Oh yeah. But I tell you, that fuck is going to be good, man. He's going to end up on the Raiders or someone. That guy's going to be good. I hope so. Number one pick, Marcus Mariota's not even close, huh? It has to be, yeah. Has to be. And then people saying, oh, he's not going to be a good pro. He's going to be another Johnny Manziel. Johnny Manziel segue, everybody. Here's Johnny. Party at my house. Let's go. 14 kinks. Has anybody ever been more scrutinized in the history of football than this bastard? Yeah. It sure seems like he's handling it all right, don't you think? I mean, fuck. Get a PR guy or something to help you out. To see him stand up there and say that speech and have the party and then they say that he's partying, I don't know, Miami or somewhere and they have pictures of him partying. I mean, it's not like he can't. That's a New Year's Eve. Dude, I get it. I get what you're saying, but... Yeah, you know. Don't you want to do something to start kind of turning the page or turning the tide that you're not all douche? I hear you think he would just get some beautiful woman to come up to his freaking hotel room and watch the three-star show. Dude, just on New Year's Day like any other normal guy. New Year's Night like any other normal guy. Don't go out and hang out with like Lil Wayne and Victor Cruz and all these guys and then go, I mean, I don't know. I understand I'd probably tend to have worse things. I heard he went to Palm Springs, though, for New Year's Eve. Did he? Yeah. I heard all kinds of shenanigans were going on. Yeah, all types of shenanigans. I didn't see him. I didn't see him. I was looking for him. Oh, were you there? I thought there was a bunch of gays down in Palm Springs. That's why you went? There are. There are. It really is incredible. I don't know if they've been around with that. Never been. Side note, I went out for breakfast the day I left and you just don't see groups of families together where both parents are all men and they all have kids and there must have been like 15 of them and you just don't, normally you don't see that. You see like the mom and the dad. I was like, fuck, this is real out here. And you were in that bay yourself? Mm-hmm. I was out there 20 years ago with Gunstream painting some houses and we were at the, we kept on seeing all these flyers around for the big white party. Oh yeah, that's big. So we're in the Hooters and we asked the girl, hey, what's this white party that's going on? I guess it's like a week-long gay bash. Did that come out wrong? No. A bash for gays. Okay. That's what I meant to say. Did you go? No. You should have. You would have fit right in. I'm sure I would have. I'm sure you would have had a good time. They would have loved you big strapping man like yourself. I think that what they call you a bear. A bear. A bear. I think you have a bear in those terminologies. Speaking of bears, Segway, Fired, the quarterback whisperer, Mark Trestman. Oh, what a freaking, that franchise is in disarray. What are they going to do? I don't know. They'll probably get some kind of retread, recycled Mike Shanahan or something. Maroon. How old? Yeah, some kind of maroon. How old is Mike Shanahan? He's got to be 65. I think it's, how red is he by now? I mean, that fucking guy. I know. He gets redder and redder. Yeah. Does he qualify as a interview under the Rooney rule? Because he's not a white guy anymore. You know, because in Rooney rule, you know that they have to interview minorities. Dude's got freaking different colored skin. Oh, yeah. No kidding. That joke was funny in my head, bud. I think they consider him a red skin. Hey. Saved it for you. He was a red skin. But it's just one of those things where they're going to recycle somebody in there and they're going to go 10 and 6 if that. How about gone as well? Which is great for the Big Ten, which is great for college football. It really is. How about as an authentic wacko? That's what I like about him. I just read an article not that long ago that one of his players was bleeding and he scraped the blood off his arm and put it all over his face in Stanford. There's no footage of that. I'm surprised in this day and age there's no footage of that. That's awesome. I guess it's awesome. He's also a hard-o. It's unsanitary as well. Who are these teams going to hire? This is like, it seems like there's a lull in hiring as far as any quality candidates. You're talking like the Tom, the Tomlins and the John Harbors kind of coming up. It seems like it's gotten a little stale. You're right, because in the NFL all you have to do is become a head coach once and you will always be in the dance, just kind of going round and round. All those guys are set for life and you're like, oh, I feel bad for Mike Smith and the Falcons. No, I don't. Mike Smith's going to go make $180,000 next year being an inside linebacker coach for the freaking Rams. You know what I mean? Those jobs are fucking cushy. I don't know why anybody would want to be a head coach to be honest with you. I don't know why. Once those guys get an assistant coaching job or go to the booth. I think Sexy Rex should go to the booth or to the Raiders. I hope he goes to the Raiders. That'd be great. Say something about the Raiders, CJ. Rex Ryan, where's he going? Dude, I want my boy to stay as a head coach there. Sperano. He wants to stay. Yeah. He's a good fit. He is your boy. You know, he was my old line coach. At BU. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah? I don't think he will. Robertson, you're not stretching. Shut your trap and fucking stretch. That's why you can never stay so low because you don't stretch. You're just yapping your jaw all day. And he made a man out of you. No, he didn't. Just coach speak. But I agree. What the hell? Keep the guy. It's all about stability. Yeah. None about X's and O's. None of these guys are doing anything. Look at Bruce Arians. Look at the Connells the other day. Bruce Arians is an offensive genius. He had fucking 80 yards of offense last game. Now, granted, it was a third-string quarterback, but who cares? Still, this quarterback's getting paid millions of dollars. He's a fucking pro. Yeah, you shouldn't be that inept. There's no talking about the third-string quarterback with fucking Wilmington High School. Yeah. You know what I mean? These guys are fucking all, in theory, supposed to be the best of the best. You think you could plug in and at least make a fucking game 80 yards of total offense? Don't you think a shitty quarterback should be able to throw automatically for 150 yards a game? You would think. Oh, you would think you would just be able to just fuck it. You know, just throw the ball deep. Throw it deep. Throw it deep. 100 ball, 100 yards, 80 yards on the ground and 150 minimum every game. You would think. Yeah. Andy Dalton's another shit quarterback. That Cincy Indy game was fucking awful. He was such a fucking smelt when I turned the TV on. You knew that was just going to be a bad game, a boring game. The only thing is, I wish Pac-Man Jones and Geno Atkins, they let him fight. You see them fight at the beginning of the game. You knew, Cincy's just in trouble. This is me, Pac-Man. This is me, Pac-Man. He's just in trouble. You know what that's from, right? Yeah, I do, but I can't think of it right now. Colors. Colors. When Sean Penn's character raids the gang party and his girlfriend comes out and she's all gangbangered out. This is me, Pac-Man. I think you said that to last episode. Every time you say Pac-Man Jones, I think of, this is me, Pac-Man. I think of, do-do-do-do, do-do-do-do, do-do-do-do-do. Well, dude, how about Roethlisberger's backup last night? Why'd he come in? That's Super Mario Brothers. I know. The dude looks just like Luigi or Mario. I put this on. Brad Kowski? Does he? Does he? You see him with his beard? Yeah, he kind of does. Yeah. And then when he was playing, this is all he could hear. That's all he could hear. That must be through regular cable, a little different on DirecTV, buddy. I didn't see it. I'm like the alternate Rob Lowe guy. That's true. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah. What? What? The alternate Rob Lowe guy. You know, he's got the new one. It doesn't even matter. Oh, the new commercials. Those Rob Lowe commercials a little too much. Yeah, but the new ones with the buff dude. That's pretty good. Meathead Rob Lowe. Yeah. Skinny arm one was good too a couple weeks ago when I was. The hairy one was a little bit too gross. That motherfucker is ageless, huh? He's got to be in his 50s. Yeah. Right? He's got to be in his 50s. He looks like he's 30 years old. Yeah. He's up at Cowboys camp a couple times this summer. Really? Yeah. He just comes out. He's like, it seems pretty unassuming. Brings his kids around. He's always out there on the field. I look at him from a distance and say, wow. I wish I had Rob Lowe. Does he have a shaved head with Cowboys tattoos on his head? No, no. There's plenty of those though. But all those dudes stopped drinking and going to rehab when they're like 24. You know what I mean? I was an alcoholic at 18. Now I don't drink anything. Yeah. You know, it's like, not guys like you, Ingles. You still push it. Every night. Except right now. Push it. You look like you're going to fall asleep. Pick it up, buddy. I am. What do you want from me, Ingles? What's next on the list? What do you want from me? We'll just talk about bowl games the whole time? BC fucking it up? You watched that one? Yeah, I did. I did. That was fucking sad. Yeah. It wasn't sad. The kicker. I mean, how do you, how do these schools not have fucking kickers? I don't. Well, you know what? I think I missed, what, two extra points? Yeah. In a field goal? Yeah. Now, what happens to that kid when he gets back to the dorm? Does he get hung by his undies on the back of a door? Do other students razz him? Or does no one give a shit at BC? That would be bullying, Brian. And that's not condoned in any way, shape, or form now. You got to feel bad for the kickers, though, man. You got to know that they got to get work. I don't feel bad for the kickers. You know they get more freaking trim than both of you two. Oh, no way. Both of you guys combined. I don't know about myself, but yeah. Yeah, what? Smell. Smell what? Oh, Lord. Speaking of smelling, Oklahoma and Texas both getting fucking blown out in the bulls. Blown out. Ridiculous. What is that, Rudy? It's a little house on the prairie. What the fuck is this doing? The Ingles. Oh, there you go. Was she living in Oklahoma? Is that where she was? Or Texas? You're only doing your own. A punk. Yeah. She's getting out of control, CJ. Yeah, yeah. Suck on this. Suck on this. So Oklahoma got blown out. They just... Thanks for bringing us back. Thank you, Ingles. Yeah. Six points. And Stoops is not in trouble at all. Stoops is like some kind of protected man. Yeah, he seems like he's kind of... I mean, there are those guys that are in like rare air that are protected. And Stoops is one of them. He's one of them. Yeah. I think it's a good thing, though. I think stability is paramount. I think that's what you need. And I guess they were good, what, 10 years ago? Yeah. But they haven't done shit in the last couple years. Can't be like quarterback Jason White won the Heisman for them? I know it. Heisman and national championship. I was looking at... Oh, no, they didn't win the national championship. They lost that year to... Yeah, USC, right? USC. I actually got a list, which is really kind of fascinating to me. It was a bunch of names that nobody ever knows. But Heisman, trophy winner, national champion in the same year. Okay, it's a rare list. However, from 1938 to 1949, it happened 10 times. And then all of a sudden, from 1949, boom, didn't happen until 1976. Tony Dorsett. You don't think of that. Pittsburgh being a national championship in 1976. And then 1993, who was it? You. Me? No. Charlie Wood? No, the you. Oh, no, no, no, no. Did you see the you part, too, by the way? So good. I watched a little bit of it, not enough. First of all, you can't believe the Butch Davis has to be a master recruiter to bring in that much talent to that team. That was fucking crazy. Yeah. That was crazy. They have like three tight ends, whatever the kid's name is. Greg Olson. Winslow, Moore, and Shockey. And then, I mean, everybody, even guys who came like Philip Buchanan, Wilfork, I mean, it's fucking crazy. And they were talking like Vince Wilfork, Sean Taylor. Yeah. Fitting on the bench. Yeah. Yeah, and the you, it could watch you part three, you part four. Speaking of that, have you been watching the football life on the NFL Network? No, I don't have NFL Network because I'm a loser and I don't have cable. Oh, it's been fantastic. I saw the one on the TV. 2006 Rose Bowl. So they kind of talk about, that was a Texas-USC game. Yeah, sure. But they bring you through all that. But the one on Doug Flutie, the one on the Dane Tomlinson, but the one on Sean Taylor is like, it's crazy because the guy just had obviously a couple screws loose and you don't remember he got killed down in Florida, I guess, a couple years ago. Yeah, but it was a random, no, it was a random robbery, wasn't it? No, he had had a party the week before at his house for his siblings and they hired a party company to come up. I think this is the story, correct? And these people saw how generous he was with people and he was giving money away and the next weekend they came back, I think robbed his house, but didn't get anything and then he flew back on an off weekend and they did it again and he happened to be home and got shot in the groin. They shot him in the leg and he bled out, right? Amazing. What a bastard. Let me continue my list though. Charlie Ward, 93. Danny Werfel, 96. Charles Woodson, 97. Matt Lynett, 04. Mark Ingram, 0. I'm going to go to the next one. I'm going to go to the next one. I'm going to go to the next one. I'm going to go to the next one. Cam Newton, 10. Jameis Winston, 13. Mariota does it this year? Fucking A. Absolutely, right? I hope so, yeah. I'm not a gambling man although I just started doing FanDuel. You ever fuck around in FanDuel? No, but I know that somebody's doing that DraftKings stuff. Same thing. So you know you hear about these people that end up going to the finals like, hey, if you win we'll bring you to Vegas. Yeah. It's a long story short but I know a guy that went there and got the whole thing. He came in eighth place, won 100 grand and they do treat you good but it's like the likelihood of you ever getting to that point is so slim to none. Well, you say that but I know a guy as well now that you bring that up that did the same type of thing in baseball and went out and spent the weekend with Ricky Henderson in Las Vegas which must have been awesome. Oh yeah, it's got to be good. I know it takes to talk to him but I mean, you get a bet to win. You can't win if you don't play. It's a buck kid for these games. It's a buck and you can win four grand if you hit the right team. I'm addicted to it on basketball in a week's time. I don't think I'll ever live another day in my life where I don't wake up in basketball season and fill up a lineup for a doll. Fucking worth it, right? Spending the scratch ticket. Yeah, that's true. It's kind of like a scratch ticket. Is this thing on? Speaking of scratch tickets, I must have spent like 70, 80 bucks a day on scratch tickets back home. I don't know what it is about being back home drinking Dunkin' Donuts, dipping tobacco, and fucking doing scratch tickets. I'm glad I left, kid. I would have been freaking addicted to some kind of opioid. Seriously. I don't know. Now I'm out here and I just do this and just drink fucking 15 beers and do nothing. What the hell was that? That's my mic. That's my mic. You're wrecking the place. Hey, so what's new with the football team and you? Mine? Yeah. I tell you my head coach got fired? No, but I know you were angling to be a... I am. I applied to Compton High. Compton High? Did you hear from him for an interview? I haven't. Yeah, but I'm going to push him when I get back tomorrow because tomorrow is a fucking first day of school back, which I'm not really excited about. Thanks for reminding me, but reality slapped me in the face. I actually have to work. Compton High, the Tar Babes, which I can't believe they get away with that nickname. And then there's a couple of schools I'm applying for as well. As long as they don't listen to the program, I think I have a shot. I'm sure they're not listening to the program, so... Yeah. Chino Cowboys as well. Do you know Chino High School like three years ago had the most players... In the NFL. Active in the NFL. You knew that or did I tell you that? You told me. Yeah. Well, thanks for jumping in on my thing. Hey, why did your coach get gassed? I thought you guys had a decent season. We had a decent season. Our principal... Ego conflicts. Our principal thinks it's fucking USC and high school football has become big business, kid. Gotcha. Unfortunately. You know, I'm the type of... I'd rather have high school football to show up August 1st. You know what I mean? Just kind of roll out the ball. Hey, let's fucking be a little bit, you know, teach them how to tackle correctly and all that shit, but... Nope. It's all big business. It's all seven on seven year round. You're getting my kid a scholarship. Why don't you get my... You know, why isn't anybody getting a scholarship and all that bullshit? Speaking of shit, did you watch the Florida game yesterday? The dude shit his pants when he had... Did you see that? You never see that. You never see that. I saw it. I saw it. I was watching that live. I was at the airport and I'm watching this game live at Legal Seafoods drinking fucking beers and watching the game and all of a sudden I'm like, that guy just shit his pants. He's running off like maybe it's dirt and they fucking put a towel around him. Yeah, and then he came back out with clean ones on. I'm surprised that doesn't happen all the time. CJ, you shit your pants all the time. Never. Never. You never piss yourself on a football field. Never piss myself, never shit myself on a football field. But I have shit myself while surfing. That's nothing worse than shitting in your wetsuit. It came out your leg? Were you chumming? Luckily, they were both spring suits that I was wearing. You know, they go down to the knees and they go down to the elbows so I can just slip it off real quick, shake it out, swim away. Yeah, well, you know, when I grew up, I grew up surfing Newport Beach, all right? And there's like nowhere to go to the bathroom there because it's in all residential. Wait a minute, you chose to shit your stuff. No. I mean, you're ducking waves, you know? You're getting in between sets and shit happens. Literally. And once it goes, it goes. Yeah. One time I was able to get my wetsuit off. Wait, one time? This is multiple times. Multiple times? Well, it's always like six in the morning, you know? You always got your coffee on your way down to the beach. Hashtag ew. Coffee does make you percolate. I'm not a big coffee drinker, bud. Yeah. Makes you shit yourself. Notre Dame looks good. I'm paying back. Notre Dame. Notre Dame. They look great. They just showed Rudy like it's going out of style. That movie's really overrated, to be honest. Yeah, I guess none of that shit really happened with that guy. Yeah, either. Everybody thought he was a douchebag from what I gather. Yeah, everything. Yeah, right. Everything's so Hollywoodized. It's like that movie. But I mean, he's a Hollywood guy, so he fits right in. It's like that movie Foxcatcher. You know what I'm talking about? That wrestling movie. Oh, the new one that's out? Yeah, I was reading the other day. Like 90% of that stuff didn't even happen. You know, they had this relationship like it was like a pseudo fucking quasi-gay relationship. Hmm. What? Yeah, I know, but it wasn't even true when the other wrestling, the guy who's... White party? The guy who's bringing... Was it about a white guy? Was it about a white party in Palm Springs? No. Foxcatcher? No, no. It was about the wrestling. I don't want to get into it. The guy was psychotic and he started a wrestling camp in Pennsylvania. Steve Carell plays the character. For some reason, you can't find it anywhere. You can't find that game anywhere. USC beating Nebraska must have been big for you. Did you go to the game? Yeah, I went down there. It was a good time. Did you really? Yeah. Did you get in the sideline or anything or no? No, no, but I mean, both of those schools actually traveled really well. Yeah, and Nebraska seemed like they were... They were there in huge numbers. Those people don't fuck around. Those people in Nebraska. I was there two days after that game. I was walking downtown and there was a shitload of fans still walking around down there. I mean, I think that something like that for, like you said, the people that are sitting in Nashville or wherever watching the game or the team goes somewhere, you want to go make a vacation out of it. They're still there wearing all their ugly ass Nebraska gear three days later. Well, yeah, I was walking around the airport yesterday in Phoenix and I saw all these people from Boise State. Yeah. Floating around. I didn't know. Boise State. What are you dipping over there, CJ? Boise State. What bowl are you even playing? I don't even know. Oh, Fiesta. There you go. Yeah, yeah. Playing the Fiesta. And have you seen them? They do that Statue of Liberty play every game it seems like and it works. I think... They did it again. They did it again. All right, X is an O warning. Here it comes. But anytime you can have a run play that throws off the timing and the rhythm of the defense, it's effective. That's why the pro game fucking drives me crazy because all they do is run innings. Inside zone. Either way. Or outside zone. And once in a while they run power. They don't do anything in the run game other than San Francisco that really gives the defense problems. And... But that's why the college game to me is so much better to watch because you see different styles of play. But that freaking fake... It's tough. Because the D-line is all going upfield. You know, they're just pass setting them so they're pass rushing. The linebacker's read pass on the guards because the guards stand up. Boom. They drop. And you can do that. You can do that like four or five times a game. But they only do it once. I digress. However, Arizona losing to Boise State. That was a good game as well. 38-30. Arizona State playing a bowl game? I don't even know what they did. Yeah, they played on the 20... Shit, they played on the 27th. They played Duke in one of those El Paso bowls out there. They won? Yeah, they won. I talked to my buddy who went and he said it was cold and miserable. Which of course it is. But I mean, what do you expect? What, El Paso's not that bad? I don't know. I don't know. No West Texas town or the El Paso. I fell in love with a Mexican girl. Nighttime would find me in Rose's Cantina. Music would play and Felina would whirl. All right, all right, all right. We worked on that song. You know, Ingles, CJ and I play in a band together? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Several projects. That's nice. Thinking about... I have another one coming. You want in? No, I don't. You can be the promotion guy. You can walk around and try to get us groupies. That sounds about right. That doesn't work very well. Big Ten is back. Wisconsin. I think that's bullshit that they now, all of a sudden, they add on the Yottage from the bowl games. Because Melvin Gordon was real close to breaking the record. Oh, yeah. Is that Rudy? What is that now? This week on Little House on the Prairie, Laura loses her virginity. Can we shut that microphone off over there? Can we shut... Can we shut that microphone off over there? You're only... You're a punk. Oh, sorry. Pretty second-rate punk. All right. Pretty second-rate punk at that. Hey, I like how they bring Alvarez back every time a coach leaves. And he just wins. And he wins. Why don't you just hire him? Yeah. Yeah, well, he's a... He's a bigger legend up there than I probably... I, however, would have thought he would have been. I mean, they love him up there. He's got a big-ass statue and everything outside the stadium. A guy like Barry Alvarez is like, you know what? I'll be the head coach. Hire an offensive coordinator, a defensive coordinator. I'll show up once in a while. Raw guy. I'll go in and I'll dance in the locker room after games that we win and all that. And I'll do the behind-the-scenes stuff and I'll just come out. I think that's basically what Bill Snyder does. Isn't that what Joe Paterno did? No. No. Contrary to... Joe Paterno was very hands-on. He was the type of guy that was there at 7 in the morning on a Sunday. Oh, wow. He was actually kind of a control freak. Wow. But I think that's what a guy like Bill Snyder does. You see Jim Mora kind of brush off Bill Snyder at the end of the day? So he wouldn't shake his hand and he came back and shook his hand? I guess. He kind of blew him off the first time and then he went back and shook his hand but then he started tweeting. You would think he would know better. You know, you think he started tweeting and he's like, I'm going to defend my players. Although I just found this out about Jim Mora. Jim Mora is a fucking snake oil salesman. Although I know some people who played for him who think highly of him but he's like, my player safety is paramount because I guess Kansas State was jumping over the pile on the knee. Which I have no problems with. But I guess they, in camp, two years ago, they brought a bunch of kids out on a boat. I'm surprised this didn't get in national news but it's funny how some things just kind of slip under the radar. They brought a bunch of kids out in a boat with Navy SEALs and in the middle of the night they woke them up like, we're going out here on the boat and they threw them all in the water. And made them swim back. And a lot of the brothers, you know, this isn't a racial statement, they're like, I can't swim! I can't swim! They're like, I don't care. But there was like Navy guys around in the area that like, so they make sure they didn't drown but surprised they got away with something like that. Yeah, you're right. Because it's dangerous. You never know freaking who's going to go underneath. Yeah, you're right. You know? But he got away with it. I think Jim Moore is going to the pros. I think he's going to go back to San Francisco. I wouldn't be surprised. I bet San Francisco better not hire Josh McDaniel. Fucking horrible. Josh McDaniel is a terrible fucking coach. I don't care what anyone says. Oh God. How can he say that? Well, from his, from his, from his, tenure at Denver for one. Two, the Patriots don't fucking score points when they need to score points. They don't go up-tempo enough for me. They don't use enough two-backs for me. I mean, he's not a horrible coach but he ain't a guy who's going to come in and fucking win games. Yeah. He's not a guy that San Francisco needs to get. San Francisco should bring in Sexy Rexy. Rex Ryan should be the coach of somebody. You think Rob Ryan would ever get a head job? No. Too long, his hair's too long. And he's not married. No, I'm just kidding but you know, that's a, that's a big thing. Guys who aren't married don't get head coach's job. I read an article about that. You know who Tom Bradley is? He's a long-time D coordinator at Penn State. Know the name. And that was a big thing. They said, you will never get head coaching job. That's a joke. I told him, you won't get a head coaching job until you're married. Same thing in the President of the United States. There'll never be a President of the United States who's not married or doesn't have kids. Yeah, yeah. Just the way it is. I digress. I don't want to get into all that. So, what do you want to talk about, CJ? Well, I worked in my garden the other day. Did you really? Yeah. What a bust. Everybody loves labeling busts. I love labeling a bust. I'll take it from here. What do we, how do we feel about Stuart Scott? It's a very sad thing. I couldn't stand him for 21 years but now that he's gone it's one of those things it's like, oh, it's terrible. I don't even know who the dude was until today. No way. I mean, I recognize the situation. Wow. I wouldn't waste my time on it. You've never had cable, huh? What? You've never had cable TV? No, really. I like the cable and satellite and all that stuff. Yeah. You never watched Stuart Scott on ESPN for 21 years? No, I don't watch ESPN. Probably a good thing. Yeah. I mean, I watch the games that they put on there occasionally. Monday Night Football. Yeah. But I never watched like SportsCenter or any of the specialty shows, you know. I like 30 for 30. That's pretty cool. You ever watch SportsCenter? No, I really didn't want to waste my time. I was usually getting laid. Yeah, I was usually spending time whacking off over Linda Cohen. Linda Cohen over there. I thought Stuart Scott was stronger in something because when I read the article, he's had so many roles at ESPN. Some of them he was better in, but I always felt that he might have been trying, in my opinion, trying too hard and always seemed like he was boys with all the guys. I don't know, as opposed to just like a general reporter. He was always trying to be like, hey, Kobe's my guy, you know. Yeah, but you know what? I will say, this is probably because he's passed on, you know, but I think he had a legitimate, in an age of cynicism, I'm one of the most cynical people around, you know, in an age of like pointing out flaws and shit. I think he had a genuine enthusiasm for sports. I think he actually liked what was going on, you know, and you got to give some credit for that. Yeah, yeah. He had 49 years old. That's Skip Bayless guy. I can watch him all day. Oof. You kidding? Yes. I can't believe Troy Aikman doesn't beat the hell out of him. You know, that would be the best pay-per-view ever. Why would Troy Aikman want to beat up Skip Bayless? Skip Bayless wrote in a book, he said that Troy Aikman was gay. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Have you read Boys Will Be Boys? No, no, I should. Is that the one with the White House? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You're an employee of the goddamn Dallas Cowboys. And Skip Bayless wrote that book? No, but it's referenced in that. It's referenced in how Skip Bayless called, pretty much called Troy Aikman gay. Oh, man. And, uh, are you kidding me? Troy Aikman's bringing in man's man. Ha, ha, ha. I don't know why I just said that. Speaking of Linda Cohen, you know who I still frequent whack over is Melissa Stark. Melissa Stark is still number one kid. 41 years old. I don't care what anyone says about Jenny Dell. I know you're a Jenny Dell friggin' No, no, I'm Melissa Stark. I saw what she was wearing that white outfit. She looked great. Oh, yeah, I know you're a Dellphonic. Will Middlebrook's good. I want him on it. Let's switch to baseball. Get Will Middlebrook's out of town. Watch him have a big year in San Diego. I could see Will Middlebrook hitting 35 home runs. Yeah. Hitting like two, 50, striking out a bunch of times but hitting a bunch of home runs. Him and Jenny Dell living happily ever after. Mm-hmm. Still, Melissa Stark is number one in my book. So the latest on your Yahoo Sports is referee from Lions-Cowboys game explains controversial non-call. And? Let me look it up here. Okay. You guys talk amongst yourselves. Fake tears? Have some coffee? Fake tears? Not yet, dude. I wish I could, I think I could do it. Hold on. Let me think about CJ. I think about CJ naked for a second. Why don't I just get naked for you? Wah, wah, wah. Aye, aye, aye. Aye, aye, aye. You're all right. According to the referee whose crew called pass interference on Dallas Cowboys linebacker Anthony Hitchens and then announced the call was reversed, an official with a better view came in and that caused the change. Nope. Terrible. No one accepted. Anyway, Braxton Miller. Braxton Miller. Did you see this on Twitter? Is he going to transfer or what? Hey, man, he's got to transfer. Don't you think? It's going to be... It's hard to... It's hard for him... Both of those fucking guys, man. Cotterill, Coddell, Jones and JT Barrett. Both of those fuckers. Yeah, you'd have to think that once he got one year of eligibility left, he better pack his shit and go somewhere because they got the future right on his heels. He should go to Florida. Why not? Yeah, you probably would have a better chance of playing down there. Jeff Driscoll just transferred out. Jeff Driscoll's one of those guys that feels like he's been around forever. Mm-hmm. Like, Jeff Driscoll's still in college football. You know, there's always those guys just like... He's still fucking playing. Like, Ryan Leak. Remember Ryan Leak at Florida? It was those dudes that are always around. Wasn't it Chris Leak? Chris Leak. Yeah, Ryan. Thank you. You're talking Ryan Leak who just got out of rehab. He did get out of rehab. I saw his mugshot, man. That guy looked... He looked like... He looked like Mrs. Doubtfire a little bit. He looked like a train wreck. He did. He did. He does look like Mrs. Doubtfire. Sorry about that. That's all right. How about Jim Kelly's freaking nephew? How many of these... How many of these quarterback kids or nephews these guys are? John Elway's kid just being a complete fuck-up. Yeah. Jim Kelly's nephew. See, he got thrown out of a bar and he threatened to freaking shoot up the whole place with an AK-47. And then when they pulled him over drunk, he ended up fist-fighting the whole freaking police crew. What a fucking retard. He transferred from where to where? He left Clemson because... And he was going to Mississippi State, right? No. I think so. Ole Miss. Okay. He was supposed to be your next savior at Ole Miss. Both of those teams. I've been saying it for those of you documenting for the last few weeks, last months. Ole Miss and Mississippi State. I told you, man. Pretenders. And both of them were fucking crumbled, kid. Oh, yeah. Both of them were crumbled. Neither one of them... I just don't think Mississippi's the football state. A-F-L-E-C. A-F-L-E-C. A-F-L-E-C. God, I love... I love... This should be a montage. I'm sure there is in the internet because there's so many fucking weirdos on the internet of just all these SEC kids. Every time, like, their team fumbles at the end of the game or something happens, they're just, like, so devastated. You ever see that? They're like... Holding their... They just freaking lost a loved one. What's up with those kids who are, like, red-shirting and they stand on that back of their bench? Yeah. And just do their shit? Yeah, and they do that shit and then they all have their sleeves rolled up. Like, dude, I don't know. Is that part of the outfit to look like a hard-on like that? It's the way it is. Look like a what? Like a hard-on. They just... They kind of look... Yeah. Do that again, CJ. Who the fuck are you? Let's just talk the rest of the time about Indomicon Sue. Kid, he stepped on him and he got away with it. But so fucking what? No, he paid 70 grand, didn't he? Yeah. That's fucked up. 70 grand. Why would you find the guy but not suspend him? It's either all-in or all-nothing, don't you think? I don't think they should suspend him. It's a freaking playoff even though Detroit's a complete fucking joke of a franchise. I don't think he did it on purpose. You don't think so? No. He's been clean all season. He's been clean for two years. That's why they didn't suspend him. Yeah. He had to go 32 games in a row. This is the 33rd game. It's because everybody's beloved Packer quarterback got hurt. I know. You know, fuck the Packers. Fuck that quarterback. You know? People do suck Packer dick. If I was that dude, I would have stepped on his nuts and got my 70 grand's worth. Yeah, yeah, exactly. You know? You don't think, no, really don't think he did it on purpose? Because I can be persuaded. No, I mean, the dude lost his balance. He stepped back. Yeah. You know, and the dude's leg was there. Get your fucking leg out of the way, you lazy ass. Fuck quarterbacks, dude. They're a bunch of pre-Madonna pussies. Yeah, they're rich freaking pussies. Yeah, they are. He said his feet were numb. I can almost believe him. Yeah. I'm sure he knew he stepped on something, you know what I mean? What was he supposed to do? Oh, I'm sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Here, get up, get up. No, fuck that. Right, right. Did you see Howie Long this morning? He's paid to fucking do shit like that. It's like he stomped. He's paid to do shit like that. No, Howie Long this morning, what'd he say? Howie Long was talking about how this act in 1984 would have been nothing. Oh, yeah. He's like, but it's 2015 and everyone's getting babied now. And Michael Irvin was on there and he was, you know, saying, and Dominick Nsou is too smart not to know that this was the first game he could get away with something like this. And, you know, I mean, it is kind of suspect that it was a 33rd game when he couldn't do it for 32 straight games. But I'm with CJ. I don't know if he necessarily meant that. Plus, who gives a shit? It was a love tap anyways. Yeah. Yeah, who gives a shit? I mean, it's a violent fucking game. Yeah. Yeah. That's the thing that gets lost in the shuffle of this. It's like... Who's going to the Super Bowl? It's the same thing in the game. Who's going to the Super Bowl? I'll stick to the teams I had all year only because for the sake of sticking to the teams, Patriots, Packers, although, right now, I believe it's going to be Patriots, Seahawks. Seahawks made me turn after the first week and that first week versus the Packers, they just dominated. Dominated. They're this scary. They're fucking scary. Patriots, Packers, though. That's why I was with... All right. Goddamn them fucking Cowboys, man. They find a way... You don't think they can... You don't think they have a chance to win up there? Who? Cowboys. Of course they do. That's what I mean. Yeah, of course they have a chance. At the beginning of this game... There's only four teams. That's why... This weekend was kind of fucking jerking off for the football fan. It's Patriots, the Broncos, the Packers, and the Seahawks. Yeah. And I'll give the Cowboys... Four, four A's. That's why I wanted the Cowboys to get taken out this week so it could just go back to the four teams. I wanted them to give it out because there's no way the Lions fucking win anything, obviously. Yeah. No way the Colts, no way the freaking... The fucking Ravens, though, man. I think if I had to show three... Dude, the Ravens beat a shitty, shitty, shitty Steelers team this year. No, I know. You know, the Steelers, as shitty as they were, surprisingly won 11 games this year. But I'll stick to what I said. Those are the Final Four. I called the Final Four on this very program in the college football scenario as well. I knew... I felt... I didn't know. I felt Ohio State was gonna find a way. Goddamn Urban knows what he's doing. But I... Yeah, I think it's gonna be the Patriots-Packers. I think Patriots... have been scaring me lately. Yeah. But I think they're gonna put... I think they're gonna put a beating on the Ravens. I really do. I think it's Seahawks and somebody. Oh, they're just dude and somebody. Either the Broncos or the Patriots. Yeah. Yeah. I'd rather see the Patriots, though. Yeah. Well, you have Massachusetts ties. I do. Somewhat. I do. You know? Go Pats! I just heard somebody fought, by the way. You can hear that. That wasn't me. Wasn't me. You can hear that over here. The mouse running around. Ingles, who do you think is gonna win it? We'll come back and say it. Final Four. Final Four. Final Four. I'd like to see, obviously, the Cowboys make it to Seattle for the battle, the NFC, and then, obviously, Denver and New England. You know what? Looking forward, I'm afraid the Patriots are getting embarrassed by Seattle. I'm just hoping something happens catastrophically to Seattle because they're the best team right now, man. They are, but remember they went through that little lull earlier this year and everybody was saying the team's in disarray in the locker room. You need those lulls in the season. So you don't blow it in the playoffs, am I correct? Oh, yeah, you're right. Exactly. Exactly. You can't be perfect throughout. It's extremely difficult. Laws of Average is regression to the mean that all the freaking eggheads love to say, but it's true. Yeah. You know, you have to, the road to the top is long and windy. It's very true. A patient man ride donkey. It's very true. It's tough to run the whole fucking thing and be perfect the whole way. Patriots proved it. Cool. All right. It took a fucking catch on the helmet, Ingles. A catch on the helmet. All right. All right. Let's get to it. Get to it. New Year's resolution. My resolutions is to be able to pronounce proper grammar. So far, I've been failing. Fuck, I got to go to school tomorrow and be an English teacher. School days. Yeah, just don't drink beer. Before your class. My resolution for this year is to smoke more weed and drink less alcohol. Really? Yeah. That's a fair thing to do. Yeah. Probably a little bit better for you. Yeah. Ingles. I think I'll stick with you. Less alcohol and probably doing probably surfing. Yeah? Yeah. I hope you don't shit yourself when you surf. And getting golf game better and all that shit. Your golf game. Your golf game better? Yeah. Are you still playing every Sunday? Dude, I won the cup on New Year's Day. You guys should play together. CJ's a player as well. I won the cup on New Year's Day. Fuck that. I don't like golfing. I beat Marvelous Marvin from USC. Kid, I'd rather freaking shoot pool, throw darts, or bowl. Darts. Throw some darts. And your new resolution is to get a sunnier, sunnier personality? Disposition. Sunnier disposition? How dare you? How dare you? Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Sonny, I have no resolution. I have no resolve. There you go. Ingles, lose weight, I guess. Yeah, fatty. I went to the doctor. What, are you playing O-line now? He told me to lose weight. He said lose 15 pounds. He lost 15 pounds. He said lose 15 more. 50. 15. 50. Come on, kid. How dare you? Take your martial arts in the new year, though. What? Martial arts. Absolutely. So either one of you want to fuck with me, I'll fucking throw an elbow on your dome, kid. That's why I carry a gun. Yep. I don't fight no more. All I do is bust my guns. All right. That's it. We're going to go drinking after this, Ingles. You want to bail on me? No, thank you, sir. You fucking puss. CJ? Yeah, I'm down with whatever, dude. Get a French tip sandwich? Yeah, I'm down with whatever, dude. All right. That's it. 2015. Beatboxer CJ. The last 20 seconds. Happy New Year. That's your beatboxer for the last 20 seconds? Ingles, you look like you're about to pass out. That's it. We're out. Hit it. We're out. We're out.