I ain't doing nothing but talking shit. Y'all gotta like, you know, encourage me the whole way along. Ow. I ain't doing nothing but talking shit. Y'all gotta like, you know, encourage me the whole way along. Ow. What did you say, nigga? Fuck off, so you can just suck my cock. That's motherfucking right. You can just suck my cock. What's happening, y'all? Konichiwa! ¿Qué pasa? ¿Cómo está la cosa? This is Nestor Rodriguez, you know, a.k.a. the Nestorius motherfucking host of Nestorius Public Radio. And we got the lovely Jenny Guzman on the fucking engineering knobs over there. What's up, ma? Hello, hello. Hello, hello. Yeah, that's it, man. So I want to say thank you to all my listeners in Korea. Also, my listeners in Iceland. I don't know how to speak Iceland. I don't know how to speak Icelandish, but I'm going to say what's up. You know what I mean? And I want to say what's up to my people in Florida. What's up, papis? What's up, mamis? ¿Cómo estamos? How you doing? That's all of Florida, because I only know Puerto Ricans and Dominicans of Florida. And I want to say to all my people in Cuba, I want to say what's popping. You know what I mean? Because I'm going to be heading over to Cuba not too far from now. And we're going to be doing a few episodes of Nestorius. Nestorius Public Radio in Havana. So that should be fun. You know what I mean? I should be off the hook. Hey, so before I go on and introduce my guest for today, I just want to follow in my pod. The pod. How do you say it? My pod father. The inspirational pod cast. My man, Mick Betancourt, that I had on here last week. My man's got it. By the way, my man got. I don't know if I said it. Last week. But he got. He made his podcast. The Mick Betancourt show made it to iTunes is top 250 podcasts, which is pretty fucking good. iTunes has about five million fucking podcasts. OK, my gerbil has a fucking podcast. It's like everybody has a fucking podcast for somebody to make it to the top. Fuck that. A top 1000 is pretty big. The top 250 is unbelievable. Anyway. So his format is. As we talked last week. But he inspired me to do this. Right. So if you take a if you give us if you go to iTunes and you give us a five star review, a fucking five star review. OK, like, yo, Papi Chulo to the top. You know what I mean? Back to the future. You don't mean the stories. Public radios rocks. The rocks, the house, whatever the fuck you want to do. Just put five stars on that shit. Take a screen grab. If you don't know what that is. And if you have a Mac, you Apple shift four and just fucking drag it and you fucking let it go. And it gives you a little screen grab of that shit. Right. You email that shit to me at Nestorius at Yahoo dot com. Or you can post it on my Nestorius public radio page on Facebook or my Nestorius page on Facebook. I'll send you a condom. OK. And a sticker. OK. Condom. Yeah. So you can fucking prevent the insanity right here, right now. You just stop it where you're at. OK. And the sticker. So you can stick it wherever the fuck you want and promote my show. All right. Anyway, with that said, with that said, I want to say what's up to my man, Ricky. Skip that. What's up, Bobby? Hey, what's up? How you doing, Nestor? You know, you know, Rick, Ricky. I'm good. Yeah. Good to see you. Yeah. Trying to get you on this fucking show for like fucking. I want to know what Nestor's drinking, man. You just I love this guy. He has so much energy. Water. It's water. That's the secret. Water. Water. Mountain spring water. Arrowhead water. Arrowhead water. I am. I'm kind of hyper, though. But that's your nature. It is. That's your nature. You're Cuban. I'm Puerto Rican. Puerto Rican. OK. OK. You're Puerto Rican. Yeah. The Puerto Ricans. I have my brother-in-law's Puerto Rican. But it's you know, they got bipolar Puerto Ricans and then they got like passive aggressive Puerto Ricans. Yeah. You know, I'm manic depressive. So I'm bipolar. And a lot of times, you know, I have like type two bipolar disorder, which is, you know, I pretty much surf. I pretty much kite surf. OK. On the mania level. So I'm like really high all the time. And when I'm down, I'm depressed, which is fucked up being depressed in L.A. because it's always sunny. Your poor wife, man. That's all I can think of. Exactly. Everyone says that. That's all I can think of. Your poor wife. Everyone says that. No one even knows my wife. You are a package. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. When we were on a fucking direct TV, I just plugged a wire in my ass and we get all our channels back. You know what I mean? Exactly. Who needs the electric company? You. You're a disaster. When the satellite goes out, we're watching TV. You ever watch a fucking TiVo show and then it goes black and glitches and shit? I fucking rewind the shit. I plug it in my ass. I think I see you do that like a couple of times at the beginning of the show. And I thought it was me. It was my eyesight. So anyway, so Rick, Rick, you have you had a show here. The is radio show on Skid Row Studios. Yes. Yes. I had a show here. It was a lot of fun. We have a lot of memories. Yeah. Yeah. I listened to you. I listened to a couple of shows. I listened to a couple of your episodes. I always love the good ones. Well, I mean, good ones. I mean, I mean, you know, it's all subjective. You know what I mean? I feel very judgmental about some of my episodes. Yeah. Right. And then some episodes I'm like, I like fucking love them. Yeah. You know, I come off. I come out of here, you know, out of recording this thing high and I'm like really proud of it. You know, there are some episodes that that I'm very proud of. And then, you know, I'm just, you know, you're a comedian. I'm a comedian. We're very hypercritical. Yeah. Yeah. We got a lot to talk about. We got a lot of opinions. We got a lot of judging to do ourselves about about what's going on on TV, what's going on on radio. Exactly. And that was one of the things I found the outlet of the radio show was was coming here and just talking about the news, things that I wouldn't talk about on stage as much, but just off the cuff. Right. Because it's not material. Yeah, absolutely. And some material would come out of it. Right. And then and then having the guest, I had, you know, I don't even remember his name, but I had a famous boxer here, Victor something. Doesn't matter. Famous boxer. Yeah. He was. Yeah. He just got like he got a professional fight. Who was about, you know, five foot six. His nose was flattened out like his nostrils are really close to his face. It doesn't matter. He was Latino. His name was Victor something. He's Latino. He's got dark hair. He's got a round face. And you do yours. You do yours by yourself. I mean, you have different people, but it's just which is an idea that I started thinking of because I had a team. Right. I had a team. I had a team, which then, you know, had a lot of bumping of personalities. Right. Right. Right. Stuff like that going on. It's when you have more than one person doing a show, it becomes harder to manage. Right. Mm hmm. Because, you know, my show is pretty much navigated by my persona, my personality. Right. Right. Which is like you said, wacky and all over the place. Right. And a lot of energy. And sometimes like Simon is one of my co-hosts, Simon Kaufman. I don't think you know him. And Rich Corbin. Two completely different personalities. Sure. And both of those together don't even have enough energy to fucking compete with my shit. Right. So like Simon, he's like ultra witty. Yeah. Like he'll come. And so a lot of times I'd be, you know, you know, we each read these articles, sometimes heavy articles, you know, like nuclear physicist type shit. Sure. And it's very difficult to break that shit down sometimes in the context of a 55 minute podcast. Absolutely. Right. It's more than an hour. So we start talking about it. You could do it. You can do it in 10 minutes, but it's got to be produced right. And I don't know if you've ever seen the show called Last Week Tonight with. Yeah. What's his name? Yeah. What's his name? James Oliver or something like that. Something Oliver. Yeah. That fucking show is unbelievable. 30 fucking minutes. Tight. Tight. Everything tight. And the writing and the producing on that show. So it's like if I was to aspire to something, that would be my podcast. Right. It would be a topic fucking around with somebody. Sure. And then, you know, sticking to the topic and having sharp, witted references to support your perspectives, arguments and whatnot. Opinions and whatnot. Right. So the thing about, for instance, Simon, you know, we'd be getting into the conversation about the show. And then all of a sudden, Simon would just like interject with like some witty. And I'm like, dude, dude, like I don't want like right now, I don't want it to be funny. So it's very different. It's not that I want it to be funny. It's I wanted to have an intellectual dialogue about the topic that or the article that we're talking about. So I get frustrated. That takes, you know, that takes me off. You know what I mean? So it's like you're performing stand up and, you know, you're doing your set. Right. And if you're seasoned, you're not just sticking to your material. But and I shouldn't say that if you're seasoned, everyone's different. But for me, I, you know, I have my material. But then I'm like, fuck. I'm like, I'm not just fucking around with the audience and using it. Right. You have to. But then somebody, you know, out of left field says, your mother sucks dick. Yeah. And you're like, like, what? Hold on a second. I got to deal with this guy. But I mean, bro, I want to deal with that guy. I mean, I mean, I mean, first of all, I can see if you said, yeah, you're durable or something related to what you're saying. But like out of left field, it felt, it feels that way sometimes. It's the moment. It's the moment. You got to be within the moment. I, you know, a lot of times the way I try out new material is it's happening. It's happening today. It happened today. Something, you know, and I had some family over recently visiting. Not my family. Where are you from, by the way? Ecuador. Are you Mexican? Ecuador. Yeah. Ecuadoriano. Ecuadoriano. Ecuadoriano. Motherfuckers don't know how to like break that shit down. Dude, I had family from South America over and it was, it's just horrible. It's a nightmare, you know? Yeah, why? Because they're loud. They're loud. They don't even know how loud they are. Really? Yeah, they're loud. And one's yelling on my left to the person on my right and the other on the right. All right. And every time they're on the phone, they're like, hello? Hello? Hello? Se oye? Hello? And it's like, dude, shut the fuck up. Right. It's my house, you know? It's like, come on, you're guests. Right. Come on. It's different. Que es guest ni guest, motherfucker? Que es guest ni guest? And the guy does this. And who is this dude? Who is this dude? He's your brother-in-law? Your brother? Your what? My girlfriend's brother. This brother that just showed up out of nowhere, dude. Your girlfriend's brother. Yeah, just showed up out of nowhere. Anyway. He's like, que es guest ni guest? I'm going to scratch my belly. Hey, brother-in-law. And he has two kids, like two and five years old. He's like, mira, say hi to your tío. Es tu tío, es tu tío. And they're like, hey, sir, señor. And he met him. Chill, motherfucker. I just met him. They call me uncle. Fuck, take me to bed first, you know? Yeah. And then they was just coming all in with their bags and, you know. Like, you were just, I invited him over for some tea and shit. Motherfuckers come in with a bag and a fucking, you know, like a tent. And it's like, no! No! No! No! No! No! No! Soy from Ecuador, bro! Yo! I'm looking at my girlfriend going, who the fuck are you? Like, what's going on? Where am I? How long have you been with your girlfriend? Is this, you recently have a baby girl? Yeah, yeah. Baby girl, yeah. Baby girl, how old? Two years. She's one and a half. One and a half. Because you were a father-to-be when we recorded the Stars in Black episode, which was Cinco de Mayo. So she's going to be, she's going to be, what, like maybe two years, I can, what? In what? Like June? In September. In September. Okay, okay. Yeah, you know what's funny is that the Stars, everything started happening when this little seed started growing. Yeah? Yeah. Why is that? Because, because the little seed started growing in 2013, let's say January 2013. Yeah. New Year's, I think, drunk. I don't know. And this is with the girlfriend? With the girlfriend, yeah. Okay, cool. With the girlfriend who has this brother from, you know, Venezuela. Yeah, fuck him. Oh, he's from Venezuela? Yeah, yeah. Oh, I thought he was from Ecuador. No, he's from Ecuador. She's Venezuelan. She's Venezuelan. And Peruvian. She's Venezuelan and Peruvian? And Peruvian. She's hot, though, right? She's cute, yeah. Oh, come on. She's hot. Venezuelan chicks are like, oh. You know, after the baby, you know, she's working on it. Yeah, fuck it, bro. Fuck that. After the baby. But guys are fucked up, right? Yeah, me too. Oh, man. After the baby. Meanwhile. I got all, I got pregnant, dude, after the baby. Dude, after 30, your fat ass comes out, you got love handles. They call them love handles. Love handles. Meanwhile, they're fucking flotation buoys is what they fucking are. They start on the side of your fucking waist and they wrap around your lower back. Us guys, we can get away with being fucking disgusting, flabby, fucking fat, whatever. I don't know. I've been told, hey, you're too fat right now. But yet, we'll have the gall, right, to say, ah, she's fat or whatever. Oh, yeah, no, no. What the fuck? Who are you? I'm about everybody's equal. All people need love. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, some of them, sure, I'm not. It's not my type or whatever. Yeah. You know, I wouldn't be. The only problem I have is with the term BBW, right? And most of them, most of the chicks that consider themselves BBWs are like fucking circus acts, right? And like big, beautiful woman, BBW, dude, you're not a big, beautiful woman. You're fucking disgusting. There's a difference. You just reminded me of my lonely days. No, no. You just reminded me of my lonely days. Because I was like, BBW, what did I see? Oh, yeah, when I was alone looking at Craigslist. Maybe there. Maybe there. There's something there. Yeah, and what happened? And what happened? Some of them responded, and there were like 350 pounds. I could never do the internet thing. I could never do it. No, but I'm saying BBW, 350 pounds, 5'4". Dude, that's not BBW. That's not BBW. Harry Back. No, that's fucking, that's an abominable snowman type shit. Come on. BBW is, you know, somebody who's maybe 20, 30, 40, 50. I go for 50 pounds overweight. You know, well-rounded. That's fine, but not fucking, you know. Um, foo-foo. Yeah. Anyway, but I'm not judging. I'm just saying I have a problem with people. Well, put it this way. I have a problem with people always having to label themselves. Right? Labeling things so that other people can identify. I'm with you. I think people should be who the fuck they are. Yeah. And everyone should be celebrating who they are. Sure, sure. And that's who I am sometimes. I like my alone time. I like my house to myself. And when people come in and they stay, I'm not myself. You know, I'm just not, I'm just not happy. So that's who I am. And I, so I started talking. So I took him. He goes, I was going to go to an open bike. You know, to practice some stuff. Sunset room. Hacienda Heights. Late night. It's a bar, right? Yeah. And he goes, hey, I'll go with you. I go, no, I don't think you want to go, dude. I do stand up so I can get away from Venezuelan brother-in-laws. That's why I do stand up. More than foca. Yeah. You don't get it. And so he goes with me. And in the car, in the car, I go, okay, you know, I'm going to be doing some stuff about what I'm feeling right now. He's like, yeah, we're friends and we're going to do some drinks. And he has no clue. Yeah. So I'm going to talk about what I'm going through right now. Right. About family, staying at my, oh, he goes, oh, what are you going to do? Joke about me? And I said, well, I hope you don't get offended. They're just jokes. Okay. Yeah. And he was cool. I hope you don't get offended. But actually how I really feel about you is you're a fucking asshole. And you came to my house for a lemonade and you fucking decided to stay for a week. Okay. I say that in Spanish, but I've been in America for too long. Hey, no. In all fairness, I got to tip my hat off to my new brother-in-law who has all this fucking money. He's a good guy. I don't know from where. He's a good guy. He bought a car, bought a car, bought some TVs. Here? Yeah. He got out of the house in two weeks. So he got an apartment. He came over here for a lemonade and he bought himself a car. He bought himself a car and two TVs. He came over here for life. So he's here. He came over here for life. So he's here. Yeah. Yeah. He's here to stay. He's here to stay. How's that? He just came, dude. And he planned it. And he's selling cars at Toyota. How's that? Isn't that fucking amazing? How's that when you don't even have a green car or anything like that? I don't know. It's unbelievable. It's amazing. Really? Yeah. What a country, huh? Really? Interesting. Isn't that crazy? So you think I could do that too? Anybody could. I could be like Toyota. You know what they said? He said he's got like a 10-year visa. That they're giving out 10-year visas now. Yeah, that's called a cocaine cartel fucking passport. Is what that is. A 10-year visa. And so I was actually telling my girlfriend, I said, who the fuck? What? He has all this money. How do we know where he got it from? I go, who are you? Does your girlfriend's sister know? She was a little bit questionable about it too. And then he's been doing his thing, man. He started his life. And he's got his two sons. And he doesn't bother me. He doesn't. Not that he doesn't bother me. He doesn't need my help as much. Right. Sure, we still offer the help. I say, hey, I'll help you out whenever you need any questions. I'll help you out. If you want a lemonade once in a while, you come over. You know what's going to happen? I'm a comedian. The guy's going to end up making more money than me. All right? That's what's going to happen. What are you forecasting? What are you forecasting that? I could tell you that's going to happen. Even if he didn't sell Toyotas. It's like he's going to be paid for all the vacations. Of course. Even if he didn't. I'm going to be wiping down his car. Dude. Dude. Dude. If he came to America with his two kids and just fucking begged on the 405 for fucking change or sold oranges, he'd make more money than you. Oh, fuck. If you're a comedian. You know what I mean? Being a comedian is crazy, man. Yes, he is. But no, no. I'm going to be serious. So you make a living as a comedian or as one of the things you supplement? It's my main thing. Really? But I do other things. Like what? What do you do? Like I host for Ford at events. Like I'm the voice. Hey, come check out Ford, California Ford, Motors. On the radio? On the radio? No, at events. Okay. Through a marketing company. Like. And sometimes it's Spanish. Like at fucking turkey, turkey fried festivals and shit where people are like rednecks are going in. Exactly. No, but like sometimes when it's Spanish version. So I have to be out there and say, hey, usted tiene cara de ganador. Llena la rifa, Philly the raffle, Philly the raffle, right? Quiere chiclets? Quiere chiclets? Quiere chiclets? I like to act like that guy. I like to act like that guy doesn't speak good English. So what else do you do? So they can identify with you. Usted tiene cara de ganador. Usted tiene cara de ganador. You have wiener on your face. Yes. Yes. You have a big wiener on your face. You look like you need a new Toyota Camry. Come inside. Come inside. Step right in, sir. You are a wiener. Step right in, sir. We are here for you. Step right in, sir. And then another job I have, another job I have, I actually train people to use their new phones. Really? In a lot of hospitals. So when the hospital, they change the phone lines. I work for a company that works for the company or is contracted with the company. Really? I work for a telephone company. I go in and teach them how to use their phones. Teach the hospital administration to use their new phones. Yeah, like just maybe twice, two days in a month, if that. Really? They call me. How'd you get into that? Referral business, people who you know. That's an interesting business. Yeah. It's like, what do you do, man? Well, you know, I teach newly indoctrinated Colombians how to sniff cocaine once they buy a half a gram. You know, because the cocaine is always being reinvented. I would believe that from you, dude. I would believe that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would believe that. They have, what they do is, you know, depending on what the cocaine is cut with, it will give you a different sensation. So what I do is I teach the prospective buyers and users of, you know, inhalants that, you know, the proper way of dosing, of dosing it, not to like fucking just inhale it all the way. Because sometimes, you know, just because you sniffed a lot of cocaine back in 1984, the new cocaine may be a little different. You know what I mean? So that's what I do. I get paid to go to hospitals to teach, you know, different people to, you know, inhale. You know? That's an interesting fucking job. So, but you do primarily make your living doing stand-up. That's impressive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get, I get, I get, I've made, I don't want to throw numbers out there, but I made some pretty good numbers where I was, I was, I was pretty surprised in making that. Good for you. And sometimes through the corporate first. Okay. Going through the corporate. So you do a lot of clean stuff. I do. I have a clean set. Also, that's not your thing, though. Being, being. Just to get paid. Interesting. Just get paid. I can't, like my sister, she's, you know, diehard Christian. And she's like, you know what? Your, your comedy for kids is much better. I like it when you're clean. And you should be, don't give in to. And I would go, but I have great shows, Michelle. She's like, no, no, don't give in to. You say fuck too much. You know, it's too much. You can't say that. I hope she's listening right now. Michelle, Michelle, you're a Christian. You can't say the word fuck. Yeah, but I was just describing your act. So it really doesn't. Yeah. Count. My mother's born again, Christian. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, my sister was on Broadway. Oh. My sister was in the play. The motherfucker with the hat. And I wasn't. I told my mom, you know, I'll, I'll fly you down. That was the name of the play. The motherfucker with the hat. With Chris Rock. Google it. The motherfucker with the hat. The motherfucker with the hat. Yes. She was nominated for a Tony. Okay. And the whole cast was nominated for a Tony. Oh, wow. That's great. The play was nominated for a Tony. Anyway. So fucking A's. What did your sister play? What role? She played the role of Vanessa. She's on Orange is the New Black. She was, she was a guest on my show here a couple weeks ago. Oh, great. Yeah. I saw a post. So you did that? Yeah. So. It's in the family. Yeah. Yeah. So what I'm saying is that, you know, my mom, you know, she'll say things like, Ay, no, pero Cristo no quiere que nosotros oigamos la música o que vemos esta película. Tú sabes, no se puede hacer. Santa María, Santa Fe. You know what I mean? So, so I'm like, ma, ma, as your daughter, you know what Christ would want? What Christ would want? Christ would want you to be happy for your daughter and to show some support. I think that's what Jesus would want. That's, I mean, you know, I'm not, I'm not a, you know, a firsthand, you know, a expert on what Jesus wants. Sure, sure, sure. You know, but, but here, my sister was in the movie Miami Vice. We were in Puerto Rico. It was the premiere of Miami Vice, Michael Mann's film with Jamie Foxx and I forgot Colin Farrell. Yeah. In Puerto Rico. I told my mom, mom, you're going to go see the movie. Right? Same thing. She says, no, I can't. No. I'm like, ma. And I'm trying to tell her, I'm like, dude, what the fuck? Like, that's your daughter. No, no, dude, man. I've had a hard, I've had a fucked up relationship with my mom because it's like, you know, it's like. It's too much. But you got to love them, man. You got to like, you got to be compassionate enough to say, you know, I have my own shit that I deal with with my life. Yeah. She deserves what, you know, I have to respect what she, you know what I mean? But it's hard sometimes, man. Well, my mom's. Same, but she's Catholic. My mom's Catholic and she's a salsa dancer. So my mom, my mom was, you know, the hot mom. Professional salsa dancer? Yeah. When I grew up. Yeah. Well, she could have been because she was always dancing. And then she gave. Which, by the way, Ray Barreto just passed this week, I believe. Ray Barreto was a famous conga player, salsero, and member of the world famous Fania All Stars. Oh, OK. Yeah. Yeah. So your mom, so your mom was a, was a, was a salsa player. She was a dancer. A dancer. Salsa dancer. Like she would dance. She dances so good. She still dances really good. Really? And so she was always like this hot mom. And so she, she was cool with me. She would listen to certain things I would say. She, she ended up, she would cuss sometimes because she was Catholic. I'm going to play some salsa because some people, you say salsa, some people don't even know what the fuck you're talking about. So let me play. Oh, yeah. Salsa music. Let me play a little salsa. Well, there's different values. Different variations. Yeah, sure. There's azúcar. And then there's. Sugar. And then there's. Azúcar. Well, that's Celia Cruz. That's Celia Cruz. Azúcar. I tell you, can I tell you my Celia Cruz story? Please tell me one. I have one too. Tell me one. My dad used to own a nightclub here in LA in Silver Lake called El Cache. El Cache. El Cache. He had every single Latino artist singer here. Jose Jose. OK, here we go. Juan Gabriel. Juan Gabriel. I would grow up with this music. Like listen to it. Listen to it. Every day. Like my mom would be cooking with this music. This is hip gyrating music. And you know, like. Every day. This is the salsa you listen to at every party. Every Latino party. This is it. This is the sweetest. This can't stop you. Like I know if there's anybody out there listening that is friends of mine right now or family right now, they're dancing. Oh, I love this song. I know they are. Right? And this is a bad song. So it's like we got to let it play. Listen to it. Listen to it. We'll love it. We'll love it. We'll love it. En los años 1600. En los años 1600. 1600. Yeah, they're probably talking about the. The talking shots. Yeah, that's the fucking invasion of fucking Christopher Columbus and fucking up the. Christopher Columbus got here and we started dancing. Yeah. Go. Oh. So my mom would be cooking breakfast and this music going on. And the bacon's still hot. Yeah. The bacon sizzling in the back. The bacon sizzling. And we're like with our forks and knives. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because you can't help it. Do the background music. The kids. Because you can't help it. I'm going to lower that. But yeah, let's talk about that shit. So my dad owned the nightclub and this was, I was 15, 16, 17 years old and I was dancing salsa with like 30 old women. Really? Yeah. So you can get down on the salsa? Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My mom, Tommy. My mom was like, it was like having money. It was like having money. It's called fucking. All of a sudden. Yeah. It's called vagina currency. Oh totally. You go into a club, white chicks, everybody, black chicks. Yeah. It's not just Latina. When you go in there, most dudes don't know how to dance. You take one and you start spinning them around. Forget it. It's like, let me know when you're done with him and you spin another motherfucker. You be there all fucking day. Every, every ex that I have, when she would tell me about her new boyfriend, I'd say, but can he dance? That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. But can he dance? So mom. Sold. Later. Click. So mom, so mom cooked breakfast and pancakes and eggs with salsa in the back. That's pretty dope. And salsa music. Dinner too. Always salsa music in our house. There was, you know, people drinking. So as we were coming into the building earlier before the show, you were saying that across the street, there's the athletic club. Yeah. Yeah. And we used to go there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You told him you had money when you were a kid because your dad had my dad had the nightclub. He had a lot of money. We were members of Los Angeles Athletic Club right here in downtown Los Angeles. And he had the money in the eighties and then he lost it all too much, just too much juggling finances. He had a real estate, he had a investment company, had a mortgage. Have you been sniffing too much cocaine? Yeah. Have you lost all your family's fortune? Yeah, that was the next business. Did you lose El Cache? in Silver Lake. Well, hello. I am Nestor Rodriguez, expertise in cocaine law. Let me help you regain all of your lost funds. And the government came down and he took off. So he had a lot of bad investments and shit like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like a mini Bernie Madoff thing. Really? But in all fairness to my dad, there was other people. There was a vice president. There were other people involved in it. And he always had girlfriends. So he was always just... He's a womanizer? Yeah, yeah. Big womanizer. Look, that's why your mom cooked fucking eggs with salsa in the back to like fucking fantasize and shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's rough, man. That's rough. So Celia Cruz... Celia Cruz, go ahead. ...slept over our house. Nice. Okay, Celia Cruz slept over... Azúcar! Azúcar. Hold on, let me get some Celia Cruz. Now, continue. And I had a friend sleeping over and he can vouch for this. His name is Tony Camerino. He knows... Who he is. You don't have to vouch for this. Oh, no, no. I'm hearing what you're saying and that's it. I told him, hey... What you're saying is word. Oh, no, but it's the truth. What exactly happened was my friend was there and I said, hey, you want to see Celia Cruz sleeping? And then he just goes, what? I said, Celia Cruz is in this room over here sleeping. Celia Cruz, for all the... for all the... you guys that may or may not know, she's Cuban. She's dark-skinned and she's what you would call Afro-Cuban. Yes. And most of the Fania All-Stars were Puerto Rican. If you really want to get down historically on salsa music and the evolution of salsa music with Afro-Cuban jazz and, you know, Caribe... Caribbean rhythm, Google Fania All-Stars. F-A-N-I-A. It's amazing shit. Amazing. Ray Barreto. Ray Barreto. Johnny Pacheco. Fucking... What's the social... The social club? What's that? That's different. That's different? Buena Vista Social Club is just straight up... Is another branch, right? No, it's just something completely different. Yeah, that's amazing how many branches there are in salsa. I don't even know. Well, Buena Vista Social Club, I don't know that you would consider that salsa. I think that's more... That's Cuban... Isn't that Cuban... That's ballad-type music. Yeah, yeah. Hold on a second. I got some ads. You're right. Yeah. It's, I mean, it's... Hold on, here we go. This is Quimbarra. Oh, yeah, this is a big one. This is a dope track. It's Quimbarra guitar que está quimbamba Quimbarra guitar que está quimbamba Quimbarra guitar Ni-na-na Ni-na-na-na Ni-na-na Oe That's how she snored. Oe, mama Oe, mama Hold on, hold on. I got the volume down. Oe, mama Oe, mama Yeah, man. See, this is my... Which, by the way, salsa is very recognizable by the horn section. Yeah. And they'll have a break. Ba-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di Boom, boom. Te-ka-ja-ke-tum-pink-tum-kum And then it just breaks into this, like... My dad was a composer, too. Really? He wrote music for Armando Manzanero, like romantic music, and he would run the orchestra at the club. And so he would prepare the music for the orchestra at the club, and they would play it. El caché, grupo caché. Really? Yeah. And so it was big in the 80s, man. Everybody... Oh, guess what? I ran a night there, Wednesday night. Guess with who? With no... The one and only himself, Jerry. We called him Jerry back when we were a kid, but they know him as Gerardo. Who's this? Who has Suave Cés right now. Wait a minute. On VH1. He was a family friend. Oh, really? So the club, El Caché, is still there? No, it's Rockaway Records now. Rockaway Records? Yeah. What, they sell records there? Yeah. Really? They changed the whole thing. They changed the whole thing into like a store. Really? They made a bunch of stores. That's interesting. What used to be a club now is like seven stores. So, but you had... They multiplied. Got it. But you had a night there? You used to do a show there? On Wednesday nights. I did Wednesday nights. But that wasn't your father's anymore, right? No, it was his club. It was still his club? He let me run Wednesday nights. I was... Really? I was... Not comedy. No, it was a nightclub. I was 17 years old. I was 17 years old. I was 18, I think. 18. The closest was supposed to be 21 and over. All my friends are coming. And they're all 18, 19, 20. Got it, got it, got it. And then Jerry's friends. And this is the 80s? Like, how old were you? This is early 90s. 90, 1990, 91. And then 89, I think. Got it. That's a good time for... That's a good time for being a Latino in LA. Yeah, yeah. And then Jerry had his people come, the actors. Like, Gerardo was meeting all the actors. And Tony Basil came to our club. The one that sings, Oh, Mickey, you're so fine. You're so fine. You blow. Oh, my man. Hey, Mickey. She was dancing on our dance floor. Hey, Mickey. She's a cutie. Yeah, all these crazy people were just showing up from Hollywood. Right. And they were talking about our club. But just like every other club here, it was three months busy, and then just they went to another club. Huh. Every club is like that here. It's like the driving. Yeah. It lasts for a while. It's like the night at the Roxbury. It's how it is here. It lasts for three to six months, and then you change the name. Well, well... Oh, they... Yeah. Because it's not cool anymore. Well, the music scene has evolved into the same bullshit. I mean, 92.3, there used to be the Art Laveau connection. They're gone. It's another hip-hop station. Yeah. It's like, how many fucking hip-hop stations do you need in L.A.? It's all... It's weird music now, man. Yeah, yeah. No club plays anything... Anyway, I'm going to sound like an old fucking idiot, but... Very... There are no clubs that play, I don't know, danceable, you know, music, right? Like... No, there are stuff. Yeah? Yeah, there is. I mean, you have... But the thing is, is this new generation is more into... It's like the repetition of something. But I was always into... Okay, then what is it then? Because there's something... That's what I see when I go. Well, it depends. It's a computer and somebody pushing buttons. Well, it depends. If there's music that has a rhythm, but with vocals and it's well orchestrated, right? You talked about your father being orchestrated and composing music, as opposed to just be like... Like, for instance, anybody can be a DJ now. Back in the day, you needed to have some sort of understanding of beats per minute. You have to have an understanding of rec music, right? You can't just like... Right now, on YouTube, I can get two YouTube windows, right? Yeah, yeah. I'm going to show you. I can open up two YouTube windows. We used to do that here. And I can play two fucking records and I can stop and play, stop and play. And eventually, I can sync them. It's pretty fairly easy. So I can mix one record into the other. But I'm saying that's without having records. That's without owning records, right? But also now, there's programs like CD mixers. Fuck CD mixers. They have thumb drives. You don't need to bring a CD mixer. You don't need a turntable. Right. I mean, a CD... You don't need a player. All you need is a fucking computer. You put a thumb drive and there's a software that tells you what the beat per minute is on one record and the beat per minute is on the other. And then you... You just need to know where you want that other record to come in. Yeah. It's just... I'm into instruments. I play the drums. Oh, you do? Yeah, percussion. Okay, well, then there you go. I'm into bands. I'm into interest. Everybody playing together. It's just the one person, the computer thing coming up with... I think the beats are done, man. I don't know how many more beats can be made. I think all the beats are done, guys. Ah! Ah! Anyway, anyway. So, we got all over the fucking place. I know. It was great, though. It's a mess. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's fun. It's fun. I love it. I fucking love it. Tell me about your show, the show that you used to... Well, no. Well, you know what? Before we go there. So, you make a living doing stand-up. Yeah. So, you do tours here and there, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get invited to... I open for Willie Barcella. Okay. He's one of the guys I open for. Okay. And so, he's introduced me. He's done a lot for me. He's introduced me to club owners out there. Out where? Just everywhere. And everywhere. Texas, Arizona, Northern California, Central. Where it's an easy distance to go and get good pay. Yeah. And they respect you for your comedy and not for how many people you bring. But that's still behind... That's still in the back of their mind. Yeah. But you get a little bit more respect there for your comedy. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. football and they used to say we were playing any weather rain mud uh you know it's a hot sun terrible ground pure dirt you know and so it that didn't matter they said they always say that didn't matter you have to keep playing and so i have a strength i know i have this strength it's called adapting i adapt when when a friend told me one time i had this key it was broken and i kept using it i just kept using it instead of going to get my key fixed he goes man you just like to adapt to whatever things happen you just keep adapting and so with with that is what i i i um you try you translate that to stand up yeah i definitely translate it to stand yeah yeah yeah and uh you're persistent yeah no absolutely and and i just and and i go to the clubs and i and i and i tell the guys the the owners there hey you need me you want i have a talk with them i i know the quick line to to get more nights and it's going straight to the owner and and building that relationship it's just that simple it's not about it's not really not about like killing it it's not about doing a great job you don't have to be funny to be in this business no it's a sad part it's not about killing it i mean you have no idea how many times i fucking like for instance the ice house jan smith will call me i hadn't performed in a while when i did that stars in black i haven't performed because i have this love-hate relationship with a dude it's like i'm not hanging out in a comedy club i'm not doing it yeah i'm not going to that other club you were telling me about the other night to hang out you know yeah you know what that feels like it feels like i'm a dog and my tongue is out and i need a biscuit you know what i mean no i i know i did that i did that for the first year i don't need a biscuit bro i need a treadmill but understand but the thing is when i when i did that when i was doing that there were guys around me that were doing it five ten years and they're still they're doing that i know you know and then and then here i was here was year one and i said i'm not going to do this for long right you know but i'm going to come out here and i'm going to just be a chump and and i still am you know to a certain to another level you know you keep going up i still am learning learning and there's just so many fucking levels i mean you you've been in la for a long time yeah you were born here i was born born born la i was born right here sixth and lucas right here right here just a right here right here good samaritan hospital right here downtown all right all right did you want to did you want to play a clip from one of your stand-ups so that my people well you were going to play the stars and i said nah i don't like that you didn't like i didn't like the stars you didn't like that because what they did was first of all yeah how much time did you do i did 10 minutes and and how much time did they air four minutes and 20 something seconds really they did the same thing to me i know but but here's the thing they told me they told me i took it when it is but but they told me that i was going to do a 10 minute set right uh-huh and like i didn't i know my jokes because i fucking crafted a 10 minute set yeah i wasn't even halfway through when i got the light it was weird right yes so i got a four minute 20 second set just like you but i didn't do a full 10 minute set but they fucking took my first joke uh-huh and and they fucking completely cut it and they took out the punchline just to set up yeah it was weird it was weird anyway so i i thought what i would do is when you said you wanted to play a clipping well if you want i thought i thought i'd play what happened last night i mean has there any comedian done a clip of you playing a clip of you playing a clip of you playing a clip of you playing a clip of you playing a clip of you playing a clip of you playing a clip of you playing a clip of you done that on a radio party hey this happened last night you were at the at the haha last night how did it go how was the show oh it's great man they got a new room no i know he bought a new place and it's beautiful oh yeah beautiful yeah he should have done that a long time ago i mean he gets a fucking crowd there yeah so this is just one little joke it's a short joke it's really excited actually it was my dad's birthday not too long ago he turned 75 years old he turned 75 years old some of you have a heart some of you don't give a shit you can see that right i don't know what to get my dad at 75 75 i asked people right somebody told me viagra you don't know my dad we call him boner dad i'll make the problem worse so i asked my dad i said hey what do you want for your birthday he said mico buy me a tablet so i can chat with my friends so i'm on a ouija board so that's a perfect example is that the joke or there's more yeah no that's it yeah that's funny but that's a perfect example of a perfect los angeles when i say los angeles a perfect los angeles crowd yeah right those i wasn't even there but i can as a comedian i could tell they're there to laugh there there to laugh hey hey you know what those are more the and it wasn't even those as the other crowds and it wasn't even packed right i could tell it wasn't like hey it was 75 percent yeah but i mean i think that's pretty good i think the the other um out of town's like they're ready to laugh well when i go to fresno oh yeah oh yeah when i go to texas oh yeah Those people love to laugh. No, no, no. But that's what I'm saying. When you're in L.A., not every time. Yeah. But I said that's a perfect example of a great L.A. fucking crowd. They're not all great. But when you go to Latino Night at the Laugh Factory, they're there to laugh. The Ice House where we did the Stars in Black. I have never had a bad set day. It's just unbelievable. You know what I mean? You've been to those rooms where there's all Jewish people? Well, it could be all Jewish people. It could be blacks. It could be white, like a lot of white. And then over those rooms, it's all the hipsters. Say the hipsters, or they have a click thing going. And then some of the comedians up there telling jokes between themselves, and nobody's fucking getting them. It's like, what's wrong with you guys? Well, I mean, New York, it depends. It depends. Here's the thing about L.A. and New York, the difference about the two places culturally, right? Culturally, Los Angeles is a car culture, right? Because you don't walk anywhere. No. Right? So that means you have very little interaction with another person. Meaning, you know, walking by, touching them, whatever, right? So you're in a car. So you're in a car. The closest you get to somebody in a car is when somebody stops in front of you or cuts in front of you or, you know, going back 20 miles an hour. You're still in your protection. You're in a shell. You're in a protected bubble. You're in a shell. So most people, and I'm not saying just L.A., in most car cultures, people go to bars to drink, to socialize, or comedy is a big thing. They go there, you know, to just, like, release their stress and laugh. You know? New York is not a car culture. New York is a pedestrian culture. At any given point, you have 50 million motherfuckers walking one way and another way. And they're all up on you. The truth of the matter is you don't want to be near somebody. Once you're done working, you want to go home, you want to chill. So if you go to a bar, you're socializing, whatever, if you go to a club, and also New Yorkers are like, fuck you. I'm paying for this. What are you going to give me? Right? And it's just like, make me laugh. And they can be tough audiences. Believe me. Sometimes it could be that way. It's just a harder crowd. But like you said, when you go to other places, Fresno, Arizona, Texas, these are people who don't get out much. They're not metropolitan people. So when you come there, you know, it's like, wow. Yeah, you're a celebrity. That's the crazy part about it. Exactly. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. I took Celia Cruz's ass. Yo, you did? Yo. Like, you know what I mean? So that's funny. All right. So that's funny. Good shit. Good shit. So tell me this. What was your show about here? What was your thing? We would talk about news stuff. And then I would do a lot of crank calls. Like, I would call up comedians, and I would say, hey, man, I need you to call in, like, Dennis Rodman. Can you do a Dennis Rodman? Or call in as Dennis Rodman. Yeah. Or I need you to call in as Magic Johnson. Or I need you to call in as something else, right? Right. Or I would step out and call as Kim Jong-un. Or, you know, we would just do these silly-ass phone calls that you could just tell we were having fun. We started. They weren't perfect. And then, you know, we would end up blundering or something fucked up. But we were having a good time. And I think that's what everybody liked because I had a lot. I've been having a lot of people asking me to bring it back. And this. This is what happened. I had a co-host. Co-host. My buddy, Rob DeRocha. Yeah. Good guy. Yeah. And then I brought in a girl, a female, to the show. Yeah. And I told Rob, I said, hey, do me a favor. Don't fuck her. And he did. And he did. And so, that's the end of the story. That was it. But you brought in Rob as a guest, I believe. Because I remember I listened to one of your first episodes. He was just a guest. Yeah, he was just a guest. Yeah, he was just a guest one time. And then. And then, you know, we kind of had a good. Rapport. We got a good rapport. And we kind of were on the same page of things. And so, I brought him in again. But then once we started, I said, hey, Rob, we're going to be like a married couple. Because we're going to fight. We're going to argue. We're going to be doing all this stuff. Yeah. Because I've owned businesses with other people. Sure. And a business partner told me that one time. You know, we're going to be like a married couple. Sure, sure. And I learned that. And it's so true. So, what happened? What did he say? We got over our hump. There was a point where we were at each other's throats. I was like, you shut up. Fuck this. Get out of here. Like on the air or off? A couple times on the air. Yeah. Because since it was my show. Yeah. I was coming. I'd say I put my foot down sometimes. You know, it's like I would get criticized. It was your show. Yeah, yeah. Meaning you paid for it for the show. He didn't. He was just coming in. It was just me. And I said, I'm going to keep it. Everything on my show. You're just my co-host. It's very difficult. But everything's got to go. There has to be a leader. I believe that there has to be a leader in anything. Somebody's got to be running the show. Yeah, somebody's got to. Like when I see these shows, sometimes I guess on these shows, there's six people running the fucking show. I'm just sitting on the side going like, oh my God, these people are crazy. You know, it's just, there's no leader. There's no leadership. Yeah. That's why doing it alone is a different story. You know, you don't really need to do leadership. You already have it. It's there. Yeah. You decide. But you also have to have some sort of, you know, energy. Balance. Yeah, yeah. And you have to have some sort of, there's another guy on Skid Row, Vic Cohen. Yes, I know Vic. And he does his show alone. Yeah. And it's 55 minutes. And, you know, the name of the show is It's a Fair Question. Yeah, yeah. And, you know, he can, you know, do a barrage of questioning with a guest for 55 minutes. And they're all intelligent questions, funny, witty, provocative. And it's interesting. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, but one thing I was going to say about your show is I always enjoy your voice. You have a really good radio voice. Thanks. Yeah, I get that a lot too. And I've been doing some voiceover work also. I did, I was the voice for an MSNBC. Some MMA fights for Black Belt TV in Spanish. So they would put me with fights and they would play them. And I would be like, Y le está pegando a la derecha y le está entrando la barriga. ¡Fuápete! Al piso, como maricones. Got it, got it, got it. And I was just having fun with that. ¡Hijo de la gran puta! They just wanted me to yell at the TV. It was wonderful, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's awesome. And I got paid. I got, like, good pay doing that. Hijo de la gran puta, by the way, is a, do you guys use that curse? Yeah, claro, claro, claro. So, hijo de la gran puta is actually hijo de la gran puta. But see, every country shortens it in some way. Well, yeah, because it's a runner. It's like, hijo de la gran puta. Okay, yeah. And in my country, in Agua, hijo de puta. What, hijo de puta? Yeah. No, hijo, no. No, no, no. Hijo de puta is the short version. It's, so basically, for those of you who don't know, hijo de puta means son of a whore. That's what it means. Hijo de puta. So basically, you call somebody a son of a whore. Yeah. But hijo de la gran puta is you're the son of the grandest whore. That means if you're just a whore, you just fuck a couple of dudes for money. But if you're the grandest whore, you fuck everybody. Could you imagine that? Some passionate fucking cursing. You know what I mean? En el año mil seiscientos. Hijo de la gran puta. Hey, how are you? There you go. Let's play a little bit more. Well, congratulations on the time that you've been doing this show, man. I remember I was doing my show and you started doing your show. I think my show was, my show was here maybe. No, mine was here before his, right? I don't know. I don't think so. Yeah, because I remember you were asking me about the place. Well, maybe around the same time. No, you know why? Because I was doing another show here. Oh, okay. With somebody else. Yes. Under another name, I think. Yes, you're right. You're right. I was doing another show. But when you broke off Nestorius and PR. Nestorius Publishing. I remember you showing me all those ideas. Yes, yes, yes. It's great, man. And if you keep at it. Yeah. Just, it's fine. Listen, listen. It's fun. I enjoy making people laugh. Yeah. I enjoy, I have opinions up the ass, right? I have opinions about every fucking thing. We all are comedians. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I just do in regular life, not even just getting up on stage. You know, comedians. We're bad. Comedians have a point of view about things, a perspective about things, right? A take on things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But to have opinions about shit like this fucking asshole or that. Perfect example. Real quick. Uh-huh. Driving in LA is a, it's a phenomenon, right? Yeah. I don't know where you were driving from. And I was going to get into this, but I wasn't because I always do it all the time, is bitch about the driving here in LA. Uh-huh. I'm driving from the Valley without fucking fail, 70 miles an hour. And when you get, by the time you get to Vermont, it's fucking, it just stops. Uh-huh. Right? Yeah. So along the way doing 70, even 80, you got people who are in the passing lane and they're just slow. Then there's one next to him, slow. People love to drive in these stupid fucking clusters, which goes back to the thing in that movie crash. Yeah. If you've seen the movie, there's something to the effect of, I think people who get into accidents do so because it's their way to try to get close to somebody else to connect, to connect to somebody else. And there's some truth to that. There's some truth to that. If you look at, if you look at the politics, if I could use that word loosely of driving in Los Angeles, freeway driving, if you look at the fucking politics of it, be aware. So, so most people like, like in an ideal world, right? The passing lane would be 70 fucking fucking miles, 70, 80 miles an hour direct. And everybody else who wants to fuck off, they'd go into the other lanes, right? The, the, the secondary lanes closer to the right. Right. And, and, and, but no people will get on the fucking passing lane just to chill because, because there happens, there happens to be an opening there. You, you may be doing 75 miles an hour and this asshole for no reason will go in front of you, cut you off. Right. And, and, and he'll, and he'll be doing five to 10 miles slower than you. It's like the, the, the concept of driving involves. Flow. Well, it also, but predominantly, primarily it involves knowing your place. Right. Within everybody else. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Oh, you put your turn signals, but that doesn't mean you automatically just go, right? You put your turn signals as a courtesy for somebody else to let them know this is what you want to do, right? Sure, sure. But then there has to be an equal amount of aggressiveness, right? Because some people are going to be like, fuck them, I'm not going to let them go. Right. Then there's got to be the judgment call, right? Is this car behind me? You have to size it up. Is he going too fast? Because if he's going too fast, let him go, because behind him there's no cars. Once he passes, then you do it. Yeah, sure, sure. But none of that shit goes into play here. No, other people don't think like that. No, no, no, no. It's almost as if you're in your own fucking planet, and as a result, there's a lot of unnecessary congestion and fucking traffic. You know what I mean? And then you have the people who are cautiously, you know, touching, tapping the brake, tapping the brake, tapping the brake. And you see, and that shit trickles all the way the fuck back two or three miles if the freeway is packed. The people tapping the brakes have commitment problems. Like, they don't want to get close to people. No, they're afraid. They're afraid. They're afraid. They're afraid it's a vivid. They're going to get into it, you know, in an accident. And anyway, it's just a crazy dynamic. Driving is a crazy dynamic. And I don't know why the fuck I brought up driving and the crazy dynamic, but I was going somewhere with it. But we're coming close to the end of the show. So I'm just going to, like, assume that that was it, that I wasn't really going to go anywhere with the driving. Hopefully, you got something out of the driving. Hopefully, you got something more than I'm just bitching about the driving. Hopefully, you got an insight as to how to fucking drive a little bit better. You know, maybe you got an insight of the proper use of a turn signal. And maybe you got some insight into the proper use of gauging how fast somebody else is going before you cut them off and fucking slow down the flow of fucking traffic. Okay, you douchebags. But for all the others. You can see Nestor at a traffic school comedy. Oh, I know. Oh, I know. Oh, I know where I was going. I'd love to see you there. Oh, I know where I was going. I know where I was going with it. I know where I was going with it. So I'm looking for parking down here. Right? I know where I'm going with it. So when you come to downtown LA, there's never parking. There's fucking parking as hell here. Right? And to boot, they're shooting a fucking film or something down here. So that means if there were three spots left, there's negative eight spots left. Right? So I'm driving around. I like to come down before I do my show and be here at least 30 minutes early. Because chances are, you have to circle around for a while. I was running late today. So I saw you. I said, let me go around. I saw a spot. And of course, this PA. Is putting cones around. Right? And I'm like, fuck that shit. I'm backing the fucking thing up. And you know, there was a meter. You can't just take a meter spot unless you have posted signs. Right? I mean, legally, you can't. That's the way it is. There's just some crazy stuff going down here right now. No, no, no. But I'm saying, the only way you can legally take a public spot is if you get a permit for it. Right? So that means you have to post permits. Believe me, I know. I'm in production. Right? You got to put visible postings that you cannot see. Sure. Sure. From this point to this point, because we're going to be shooting. But what happens is, today, they need extra spots. I can tell. Right? So I said, fuck it. I'm just going to back up. And you know, I'm just going to. So anyway, I do it. I turn my car off. I'm getting ready to go out the car when one of the fucking LAPD film division guys comes up. And I've seen him a lot. This one particular guy. He's always down. He comes over. He goes, hey, they're going to be doing a turnaround shot from the. Water grill. And they really need this spot or whatever. And I was like, now I know that legally I can park there. Right? I know. So I said to him, well, let me ask you this. Is it possible that I can go do my show? I do a radio show here. Like, it's always going to take me an hour. Is it possible that I can just leave the car here and park it? And he goes, nah, I wish I could do it. Right? Now, if I wanted to get into it. Right. If I wanted to get into it with him, I could have said, there's no fucking signs here. There's no permits here. So fuck you. All right. You tow my car. But then they can tow my car. And then you got to deal with it. You got to fight. Right. So anyway. So he says to me, isn't there any parking up there? And I said, there's no fucking parking. You fucking guys took all of it. And this is a cop. I'm telling him. You know what I mean? But he says, New York. He looks at me. It's like, whatever. All right. I say, yeah, fuck it. Let me get out. All right. So that was. So your car got towed, probably. No, no. In a loading only zone. The yellow. Yeah. Which you can't after six. Don't tell too many people. Yeah, I know. Exactly. Anyway, listen. This is the end of our show. Make sure to go to iTunes. Give us a fucking five star review. I'll send you a condom case. Go to Facebook. Facebook. Go to our Facebook page. Like our Facebook fucking page. Nestorius Public Radio. You know, we need more likes. Yes. And what's up with you? What do you got? I have rickis.com. All my information. All my videos. R. I. C. K. I. Z. Dot com. I got a show at the Laugh Factory next Wednesday. I have a guest list. Hit me up. I got a show at the Ice House March Friday the 13th. Nice. Hit me up. Hit me up. And then Ontario Improv March 26th. That's one of my favorite clubs. Whose show is that? I know. I love it. That's my show. It's my show, baby. I'll bring you out to one. Ontario? I'm doing more. Yeah. Yeah. That's my favorite one of my favorite clubs. I'm doing like one every two months. March 26th? Yeah. I'm going to swing by any fucking way just to check out the show. Dude, thanks, brother. Thanks. I love the show. March 26th. Thank you, brother. And the Ice House? When is you doing the Ice House? March 13th. Friday, March 13th. I'm not going to be here. Stage two. I'm not going to be here. Where are you going to be? Havana. Havana. Oh. I'm going to be in Havana from March 5th. From March 5th to March 15th. All right. I want to hear about it. Oh, it's going to be dope. Anyway, that's our show. Thank you, Jenny, for letting me go over a couple minutes. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Pick the fuck up, you motherfucker. Yeah. Shut it off. Get it off. Let it off. Shut it off. Get it off. Let it off. Shut it off. Get it off. Let it off. Uli, it's me. Uli, it's me. Uli, it's me. Uli, it's me. I ain't doing nothing but talking shit, so y'all got to, like, you know, encourage me the whole way along. Ow. I ain't doing nothing but talking shit, so y'all got to, like, you know, encourage me the whole way along. Thank you.