Puppet talk with David Lunch and Doug Loosenhop

Thank you. Crunch, crunch, crunch my cereal bunch. Adam O. Adam O. Six, five, four, three, two, one. Breakfast show. Adam O. Adam O. Adam O. Adam O. Adam O. Adam O. Boys and girls, welcome to the breakfast show. This is the Adam O. Podcast. And I'm Adam O. Woo-hoo! Yes. Oh, my gosh, boys and girls. Oh, I'm so excited because I watched the Muppet movie. And it inspired me. And right in front of me here at Skid Row Studios, I'm playing with my very own puppets. Yes, that's right. I created some puppets. One of the puppets is a hand puppet. Hey! Oh, and it's pretty fascinating because it actually talks out of his eyes. It took me over an hour to design this puppet. And you know what? I wish I could become a puppet. Maybe one day. Maybe one day I will be like Pinocchio and I'll be a puppet. Uncle Chickster, how you doing today? Fantastic, Adam O. The secret of success still is. Oh, that's terrific, Uncle Chickster. Hey, how do you like my puppet? It's called Her. Her! I like that. It's kind of like a Pee-wee Herman puppet mixed with a little bit of Weird Al. Her! And it has a lot of stripes. David Lunch, how you doing? I'm doing okay. Considering that I'm looking at you, but I'm doing fine, Adam O. Thanks for having me again on the show. Oh, you're welcome, David Lunch. David Lunch, boys and girls, is the world famous storyteller and my arch nemesis. And of course, Uncle Chickster, if you're just tuning in for the first time, the Adam O. Podcast, he's the legendary serial mascot of the 1960s serial Chicks Crisp Pinwheels. And I'm Adam O. and I love puppets, the Muppets. Let's talk about the Muppets movie. There was Kermit the Frog. And he had this like cool voice. And then there was Miss Piggy. And then there's my little puppet. Like I said, it's like a Weird Al and Pee-wee crossover. And it doesn't really make sense, but I like it. And it wears a little Hawaiian shirt too. David, you like my puppet? Yeah, Adam O. I'm very excited for your puppets here. You know, I'm glad we're doing a show about puppets. It brings up an important issue that most people are afraid to talk about. But, you know, on this type of show, we're not afraid to talk about puppets. Because for me, puppets have always held a sort of mystery and intrigue. And I'm glad that we're able to talk about that today. Okay, that sounds like Puppetry 101 to me, Mr. Lunch. Boys and girls, our very special guest today is the one and only Doug Loosenhop, aka DJ Doug Pound. And he'll be calling in the show any minute now. So stay tuned, boys and girls. David, how was your week? My week was pretty good. I actually went out and I bought a puppet myself. And I brought it here to show you. Got this fella here. Bought him off of Craigslist from a woman in Los Feliz. And gave him a name. His name is Jeffrey, Jeffrey Beaumont. And... Wow, that's amazing! Yep, you can see he's got a little tuxedo here and brown hair. And his mouth moves. He's got a little string in the back there. He can really do a lot of good things with this guy. And I tell you, the lady, she originally wanted $20,000 for it. I talked her down to $19,500. I'm a master negotiator. And then I got home and looked it up on eBay. And puppets like this are going for about $40. So, took a bath on that one. But, you know, that's part of life. You win some and you lose some. And definitely lost badly on this one. But glad to have a puppet. Yeah, David, that's a pretty cool puppet. I didn't know you were into puppets, too. I just got into puppets after watching the Muppet movie. And... Wow! You're a puppet, David? Well, not really because, you know, I paid about $19,000-some bucks more than I should have. But at least I was able to identify a puppet and recognize it as a puppet. But next time before I spend money on one, I will do further research. Okay, well, my hand puppet doesn't really speak, like I said. But you know the voice. Let's hear your puppet's voice. Hey, I'm a puppet. And I'm on the show. And thanks for having me, Adamo. Oh, well, thanks for having me. I'm a puppet. I'm a puppet. Oh, come on, David. That's not a puppet voice. What are you talking about? How could you distinguish between my voice and the puppet voice? Well, Kermit the Frog, he has a real animated voice. Hi, boys and girls. It's Kermit the Frog. I think that's Kermit. Okay. Oh, hi. I'm Adamo, and I suck. Oh, David. Pretty good, huh? I did that on the fly. Didn't even rehearse. Okay. I'll let you work on that while the show gets better with my puppet and me. Oh, boys and girls, it looks like we're getting a phone call from the one and only Doug Lusenhop. Doug, are you there? Yes, I'm here. Hey, Doug. Hello. How are you? Good. How are you, Adam? I'm very well. We're here at the Adamo Podcast, and I'm alongside my arch nemesis, the one and only David Lunch. David Lunch, say hello to the one and only Doug Lusenhop. Hi, Doug. Thanks for joining us. You're the first person on record that we know definitely listens to the show. It's good to have a listener. Hey, no problem, David. Well, if you guys are arch nemesis, why would you be sitting next to each other? Well, we're not, Doug. He's actually a cross for me, and today's show is all about puppets, and I created a puppet. It's a cross between Weird Al and Pee Wee Herman, and it doesn't really talk, but it wears a Hawaiian shirt, and it goes, ah! And David just created a puppet in front of him, too, and so we're competing. You know, Doug, to answer your question, why we hang out here, you're right. Technically, we shouldn't, but sometimes in life, you have a higher calling, and you need to do a service, and I need to serve Adamo, and I have a series of ulcers to show for my sacrifice that I made, and I oftentimes vomit prior to the show because it's so nauseating to be here with him. But, you know, we're glad to be, to have you on the show. Quick question. Who would win in a street fight? Would it be Animal from the Muppets or Franklin, the puppet from the TV show? Or would it be the Muppets from the TV show Arrested Development? Well, I'm gonna have to say Animal, but, because I don't know what a, what's a puppet? I know, I know what Animal is, the drummer. Right. He's a wild, he's a wild, he's a wild guy. I've seen him before, but, you know, I'm not sure if I know what a, what's a puppet. Yeah, I'd go with Animal anyway, too. He's got the teeth, he's got the drumsticks that can be used as weapons. Yeah, let's, let's go with that one. Wait, David. Yep. Doug doesn't know what a puppet is. Should I tell him what a puppet is? Shoot, yeah, go for it. Well, Doug, after watching the Muppets movie, it inspired me. A puppet is something that is very fuzzy, and sometimes you can stick a hand in it, and it can open its mouth, and usually it has fake eyes. Um, are you following? Wait, is it like a, uh, like a, like a mitten? That's not... Hand warm? Yeah, like a sock. Is it something you can keep your hand warm with? Kind of. I mean, you're from Chicago, um, you've never seen, uh, people with puppets on their hands? Well, I've seen people with hands in their pockets. When it's cold. Oh, those are puppets. Is that what a puppet? Is that a puppet is like a pocket? Well, I don't, I'm not sure I follow you. Um, I think a puppet actually has to come to life and has to have its own voice of its own. So, have you ever had a friend that's a puppet? Well, I've seen the Muppet movie, but I've, you know, my, sometimes my mom would put, um, like, I guess, a puppet on her hand when she wants to take something hot out of the oven. Is that a puppet? When she... Oh, yeah, like a, like a mitt, like an, like an oven mitt. You know, that could be made into a puppet if you put some, like, eyeballs on there and, um, but, yeah, getting back to what Adam O. said, I think they kind of have to talk, um, because it's hard to have, like, a mute puppet. I don't, I don't know that they exist. Wait a second. How does a puppet talk when it's on your hand? Well, that's where the magic comes in. How does... Oh, the magic. Yeah. Oh, so it's a magical thing. I'm going to defer to Adam O. on this one. Magic, right? Absolutely, 100% magic. I mean, you have to have a voice for your own puppet. Yeah. Yeah. You have to give it eyes, a mouth, lips. Uh, you have to make it like a human, Doug. Oh, so you have to make it. It doesn't just come to life like a, like a, like a frog or something? Well, that all depends, um, what kind of puppet we're talking about. Pinocchio came to life like a frog, but the Adam O. puppet has not came to life yet, and that's just, you know, a puppet you wear on your hand. Okay, so you don't have Weird Al on your hand. He doesn't have to be there. It's a different thing. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. So, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so, uh, so it in and offer it a sandwich, I guess. Okay, so is a Muppet a puppet? No, they're real. Those are humans, right? Okay. I get confused myself. Small people doing fun stuff, I think is what Muppets are. Okay, so animals not on someone's hands. Well, you know, there are puppets that aren't on people's hands. I don't know if they're in some kind of union and they can get around it. I think they might be on strings. They're manipulated somehow and I think he might fall into that latter category with the strings. Wait, is a kite a puppet? Because that's on a string. He's bringing up some great questions, Adam. Yeah, he is, actually, and I'm a little mind-boggled. I think, again, if the kite spoke, that would be a good indicator that it was a puppet. But it needs eyes to know where it lands and how high up it goes in the sky, David. Oh, okay. So if it had eyes on it, then it would be a puppet. Because right now, it's just a sky puppet. Maybe that's why it's just called a kite, because it's not a puppet. Yeah, maybe that's how they classify them. Yeah. Okay. I think I got a good idea. Hmm. So you guys have both made your own puppets then, huh? Yes. I bought mine. He made his. Yep. And then, uh, what did you name him? Mine's name is Her. Her? Mine's is, uh, Jeffrey Beaumont. Why would you name it Jeffrey Beaumont? Uh, it's named after a character in a film I very much enjoyed called Blue Velvet. Okay. Is there any puppets in that movie? No, but there should be. And if there were, the film probably would have had more success. Okay. Kind of an obscure title, then. Yeah, yeah. It kind of flew under the radar. But I champion it, and I enjoy the film. And believe me, if you saw the film, you would want to name a puppet or a child after this character as well. Okay. Well, I'll have to get it in my, um, I'll check my library and see if they have it. Yeah. I'm sure they will. Doug Lussenhop, we are huge fans of you here at the Adam O. Podcast. Yes. And, um, we just want to say thank you for calling in the show. And, um, I just wanted to let you know about the six different puppets. There's the string puppets, the wraparound puppet, the finger puppet, the half-body hand puppet, the full-body hand puppet, and the hand puppet. Okay. Oh, there's six types, huh? Okay. There's six types of puppets that you could take with you to the next stage of your career. We love you, Doug. Thank you for calling in to the Adam O. Podcast. Boys and girls, that's Doug Lussenhop, a.k.a. DJ Doug Pound. Thank you, Doug. Thanks, Doug. Appreciate it. Yay! Yay, Doug. I think he's gone. Yeah. Boys and girls, that was amazing. Real special treat right there. That was DJ Doug Pound, a.k.a. his real name, Doug Lussenhop, calling in the studio here at the Adam O. Podcast. And, of course, David in front of me created a really weird puppet he found on, what, Craigslist? Yep. Found it on a website. And, um, again, just a warning, puppets don't cost as much as you might think they do. If they're asking for a puppet that costs as much as a car, you probably don't want that puppet. Buy the car. Well, I'd rather buy the puppet because I don't drive a car. I'd rather drive a puppet. In fact, I should make the first puppet car. That'd be cool. Hey, speaking of puppets, so I named six types of puppets. Both David and I presented our lovely puppets. Now, boys and girls, for the history of the puppet by the one and only Uncle Chickster. Yes! I'd love to talk about, uh, puppets. Uh, while the general definition of puppet is that of an object, uh, manipulated by someone, the history of puppets is, in fact, long and a varied one. While today they are widely considered to be, uh, entertainments for children, uh, more and more people are discovering that puppets have always held in place for entertainment of all ages. By, uh, taking a look back in history, you'll see all kinds of puppets. You'll be able to see that the contribution of puppets and puppeteers to the arts has been a big inspiration to everybody. Now, myself, Chickster, yes! As a young man, uh, I grew up in Southern California, and I was born in 1946, and I lived in, uh, a little house, sort of like a gingerbread house. It kind of went with puppets, but I was an only child. I had a split personality, and, well, everybody loved both of them. But, uh, one of my all-time favorite kid puppet shows was Howdy Doody! And, uh, this was on television oh, let's see, around uh, I think it was December of 1947, and Buffalo Bob Smith was the host, and Clarabelle the Clown didn't speak, and the only communication Clarabelle had was with a honk of a horn. And if he didn't like you, he would squirt seltzer of all things in your face. And kids would sit in bleachers that had a fancy name called Peanut Gallery. And the show went something like this. Say, kids, what time is it? It's Howdy Doody time! Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. That was one of the shows, and another show that I liked was Edgar Bergen and Charlie McCarthy. Of course, they started in 1936, and I was born in 46, but I enjoyed listening to repeat shows. And the show went like this. Oh, Mr. Bergman! Oh, Mr. Bergman! Mr. Bergman! Now, do you have a toothache, Charlie? Oh, no, Mr. Bergman. I just got more nerve than a root canal. You see, folks, when Charlie was born, something terrible happened. He lived. Later on in life, as an old man of 13, I am the chickster. You see, I enjoyed playing with the puppet Bozo the Clown, and this started in 1959 on TV. There was a silly goose, and he had a big papoose. He was a silly, silly, silly, silly, silly, silly goose. Isn't that right, Butchy Boy? Right? And that's the story of what I know about puppets, Adamo. And that's Uncle Chickster with Uncle Chickster's History of the Puppet, and boy, am I getting the munchies. Ooh, and me and my puppet are gonna enjoy a nice big bowl of cereal with the one and only, boys and girls, you know what time it is. It's crunch time with Chef Kazooie! Yay! Hey, Chef Kazooie. Ooh, boy, I could use a big bowl of this cereal right now. Oh, I don't know, Adamo. We seem to be out of cereal. Well, what about Lady Bubba Chubba? Do you have any cereal for me? Now, hiya, kids! Hi, boys and girls! Now, Bubba Chubba is my name, honey. Well, I'm a line cook at the factory. Well, I make cereal grain. Lady Bubba Chubba, that's great, but I'd rather get my cereal actually from Chef Kazooie, because he's sweet, and you seem a little bit, uh, you seem kind of, I don't know if you're a lady, a man? You sound like Uncle Chickster. Oh, Adamo, and this is Chef Kazooie, and that's Lady Bubba Chubba, and I found Lady Bubba Chubba outside of the cereal factory on my way home from work. What? Well, that's kind of creepy, but, uh, I accept as long as I get a big bowl of cereal, and Chef Kazooie, guess what? I have a puppet today! So feed me! Okay, Adamo, I feed you! Oh, boy. Thanks, Chef Kazooie, and thanks, Lady Bubba Chubba, for this delicious bowl of dry cereal. I love you, honey! I love you! I love you, honey! Wait, Chef Kazooie? Yeah, this cereal, did you not hear me? It's kind of dry. Oh, you had the milk! Who's there? Hey, Adamo, it's, um, it's Gab Fublin, the milk man. Boys and girls, it's Gab Bingo, the milk man! Put your hands together! Ha ha ha ha! Hey, Adamo, I didn't know you could whistle. Ha ha. Well, Gab, actually, I just need some milk. Do you have any milk? Ha ha. Yeah. Let me just check the stove. Ha ha ha. Um, what happened to you, uh, Gab? Um, Bingo, whatever your name is, you seem a little bit out of it today. No! I just took a trip to the mountains! Mountains! Ah! Okay, um, Gab, Bingo, the milk man, I need some milk. Adamo, ooh, you want some milk? Okay, let me just sing you a song about milk. It goes a little something like this. Once upon a time, I ate some cows. Mmm! And then a little milk came out of the... Bingo, this is weird. Oh, it's not weird. It's just milk. Okay, here you go, Adamo. Here's some milk. Thanks, Bingo. Oh, boy, thank you so much. I'm as thirsty as a camel with no hump. Boys and girls, that's Bingo, the milk man. Hey! Hey! And now, to the one and only David Lunch is gonna tell us all about his next feature film, All About Puppets! Yep, Adamo, I've always been interested in puppets, and I've always been interested in wood. So I've combined the two ideas, and my next film is about a puppet with a log. And the puppet takes this log everywhere, and they have a very special relationship. He can speak to the log, the log can speak back to him, and tell him, like, when it has visions, like, if someone goes missing, the log will tell the young man where the person went, and it's a very mysterious kind of film, and there's gonna be a lot of intrigue, and a lot of, um, it's gonna be kind of from another planet, it's gonna be, um, you know, we're gonna go fishing into the well, and if you fish in the deeper areas, you find bigger ideas. If you fish in the shallow areas, you have more small ideas. And that's the film. We're waiting on some funding from Portugal, but looking forward to making it. That sounds amazing, David, but actually, I wanna hear a story. I wanna hear a story. Boys and girls, who wants to hear a story about puppets? Woohoo! Yeah! Yeah, we want to hear a story, Adamo! Okay, I guess that's my cue. Well, once upon a time, there was a puppet, and he found out that he was going to become a father, and he just, he had some kind of misgivings about it, wasn't sure if he was ready to be a dad, and you know, back then, this film, excuse me, this story took place in the 1970s, so psychology wasn't really where it is today. Men weren't encouraged to talk quite as much yet, they were starting to, but so he kind of disappeared into a dream world, and imagine that his new baby might actually be some sort of unidentified kind of animal, monster type of thing that, even to this day, we don't know what it was, and what his life might be like. That sounds neat, David, but what about the puppet part? Because I, you know, love puppets, and I don't understand anything what you're talking about. You betcha. Well, the puppet was, you know, he lived in a puppet world, and, you know, he had strings, and he had a guy that controlled him, but even though he was a puppet, he still had thoughts of his own, and still had to, you know, consider what it was like to be a dad, and there was a woman who lived across the hall from him, who he was somewhat intrigued by, and that kind of added even more strangeness into the mix. Oh boy, I wish I was a puppet. Well, we don't really need any more puppets right now, the story's been cast, Adamo, but maybe if you want to do background, you want to be an extra? No, I actually heard from the grapevine, aka the cereal vine, that you're looking to cast the lead puppet in your film, and also the lead actor in your film, so what do you mean it's already been casted? Well, I think you might be a little confused with what I'm telling you as a story, but the film, the young man with the log, yes, we're still looking for that man to play the young man with the log. We need someone who's about 14. Well, David, I'm 10. I could try to play your puppet. Well, let's see. What we'll do is we'll have you come over to my office, and we'll sit in a room with a log, and you're just gonna hold it, and we'll just leave you in there for two to three days, and then we'll come back out, and we'll let you out, and we'll talk about what your experience was like, and we'll go from there. Sounds terrific, David, but when do I get to become a puppet? I'm waiting! Well, okay. So let me get back to my story here. So he was intrigued by the woman across the hall, and then Adam O. came walking down the hall because Adam O. also lived on his floor, and he saw Adam O., and Adam O. said, hey, father-to-be, I want to become a puppet. Will you make me a puppet? And so the man took out a wand, because all of a sudden he had a wand for the sake of turning Adam O. into a puppet, and he went presto, and Adam O. became a puppet along with them. What? Oh, I'm shrinking. I'm shrinking. Yep, and naturally Adam O. had to shrink down to puppet size, because originally he was a human, and I'm not even sure why he was allowed to live in this apartment building to begin with, because it was a puppet building, but they let him in, they made an exception, but now here he was, also as a puppet, and now doing puppet stuff. What are you, are you dancing? Wow, I'm a puppet! I'm a puppet! I'm a puppet! My dream came true through David's story! Thanks, David! I'm a puppet! What do you want to call me? What do you want to call me? So, so here's this guy, and he's still kind of not sure if he's ready to be a dad, but all of a sudden his neighbor was a puppet, and his neighbor's name was Jim. I'm Jim! The puppet! Yep, so he was at least happy for his neighbor, because his neighbor's dreams were coming true. He not only had become a puppet, but he also had a new name, and Jim was like, hey, hey, guy, um, let's go to the park and, like, throw the frisbee around, and then we'll go get a pizza, and then I know a really good market that has really tasty donuts, and we'll just sit there and we'll have some donuts, and then you won't have anything else to worry about. The, uh, or should I turn you back? Okay. Wow! This is amazing! Hey, Uncle Tixer, look at me! I'm gonna get twice as many girls as I've ever got at the cereal factory now that I'm a puppet! Yes, I see that! You know, Adamo, I think you were carved out of wood. I mean... No, Tixer, that's Pinocchio. I think my name is Jim the Puppet! And I have a little, little, uh, trademark laugh, by the way, and it goes a little something like this. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! What do you think? That's funny. You know, I think you tried to be a tree surgeon once, but one day you fell out of a patient. Oh, no, Tixer, I have no... I'm a puppet, a patient. Why, are you trying to... That explains a lot of stuff, actually. Well, this is amazing! Well, I want to say thank you to David for the time, actually. Thank you, David, for making me a puppet! Remember, you're a non-union puppet. You're a background puppet, so I can only pay you the background non-union rate. I think it's 50 bucks a day, but glad to have you on board. Who cares? I'm a puppet! I can sneak into everybody's bowl of cereal and eat it while they're not looking, because I'm small, and I'm a puppet! Puppet! Yep, that's something you can do. Is that... Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality. Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see. I'm just a poor boy. I need no sympathy. Cause I'm easy come, easy go. Little high, little low. Any way the wind blows doesn't really matter to me. To me. Mama! Mama? Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Yo ho! Mama! Yo ho, Mama! Mama? Mama? Dada? Dada! I see a little silhouette of a clam Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the fandango? Fandango that like me, very, very frightening me Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Figaro I'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me He's just a poor boy from a poor family Sparing his life from his monstrosity Nom, nom, nom Easy come, easy go, will you let me go? Ma, na, ma, na Let me throw Ma, na, ma, na They will not let you throw Let me throw! Ma, na, ma, na They will not let you blow Let me chaw Do not like your jokes Let me chaw Do not like your jokes Let me chaw No, no, no, no, no, no, no It's for niggety, for niggety Mama me, I'll let you go Does anyone know winter is so hot for me? For me! For me! Do they tell us this video's going too fast? All I know is we're not getting paid tonight Oh, baby Can't you listen, baby? Just gotta get out Just gotta get right out of here That's all Yeah Yeah Nothing really matters Anyone can see Nothing really matters Nothing really matters But moi Any way the wind blows Wow! Puppetland is pretty amazing guys Thanks to David I'm a puppet and I'm little and I'm a shark and I bite and I bite My name is Jim, and that was a musical break by the Muppets with their version of Bohemian Rapsberry. Woo-hoo, Chickster, how'd you like that? That wasn't bad at all. I mean, I got a big kick out of that, you know what I mean? I knew some people, Adamo, and I just want to tell you, I want to share this with the radio audience. I knew these folks, and they kept their puppet Charlie in the closet for years. Until Charlie turned 15. He thought he was a suit. That's cool, Chick. That's actually kind of funny. Hey, Lunch. Yep. Does your puppet sing, too? Because I, you know, have been practicing listening to the Muppets. I'm not going to sing. Well, that's great, David, because I am the star of your new feature film. Wait a second. Guys, there's somebody at the door. Oh, my gosh. Boys and girls, he's back. The actor, Chris Dodson's here. Hey, Chris, what's up? What are you doing here? Hi, Adam. I'm sorry. I didn't realize you guys were on the air. I'm just here to see David Lunch. David mentioned that he was casting a film, and I told my manager about it, and my manager actually told me to have nothing to do with David Lunch, and I didn't realize you were on the air. My manager probably knows about this, but nope, don't worry. Chris Dodson. We've only had one listener the entire time we've been on, and he already left. He called in, and we talked to him, and he hung up, and as far as we know, that's the only person who's ever listened to the show, so you're in the clear. We might as well just be in Siberia at this point. Oh, cool. That's reassuring then, because I heard that you were casting the puppet log movie. Is that right? Like a guy who just carries a log around and just hangs out with the log all day? Yep, that's kind of it, but there's a lot more to it than that, because logs, there's a lot going on there. You know, below the surface, it's not just wood. They have a philosophy. You know, you can shake hands with a piece of wood, and you can ask it where it's been. It probably won't answer you, but you can at least ask. Well, that's great, David Lunch. So here's my headshot, and if you want to consider me for the movie, I think that'd be awesome. That's great. The character is 14 years of age. May I ask you how old you are? Well, I'm in my 30s. Perfect. Yes. Oh, dude, that's awesome. David, that is such a great move to use the wonderful actor of Chris Dawson. Hey, Chris, you're going to be playing alongside me. I'm Jim the Puppet. That's great, but again, if you could really make sure my manager doesn't hear this, that would be awesome. He said it's a really bad career move, and I like you guys. It's nothing to do with that. It's just, you know, I'd prefer it if this shows up. It's not broadcast. But either way, it's just good to be here. It's good to see you guys, and could I have some of that pizza? Of course you can. Yeah, sure. Hey, speaking of David Lunch and his new movie, of course, David always brings his personal assistant around the studio nowadays. Hey, Una Mars, do you want to get Chris Dawson a piece of that delicious pizza? And while you're getting him that pizza, why don't you give the boys and girls out there, your weekly update on astrology for kids? Good evening, everyone, including mamas and papas, sons, daughters, grandmas, grandpas, puppet makers, as well as all the children and adults who love the magical world of puppetry. This is Una Mars, your friendly, astrological forecaster on behalf of the Atomo Breakfast Show podcast here at the fabulous Skid Row Studios in Los Angeles, California. The stars will always prevail and inform you of the day and evening you are having. Hopefully a great one at that. Just remember, starlight, star bright, the first star icing, the sun rising, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, the sun setting, Others sit back and admire your natural energy and enthusiasm. Tonight, go out and have fun. Your lucky numbers today are 20, 1, 4, 44, and 18. Now remember, puppets are like stars. They dance and spin around, radiating joy and happiness to all. Una Mars, your astrological correspondent, signing off from the top of Crunch Mountain, wishing you only the best, and see you next time. Bye, Adamo. Thanks, Una. Hey, Chris, how was that pizza? It's delicious. Good, because you're going to need the protein. And that pizza for David Lunch's first scene that he's going to direct right here live. That's right. David just whispered in my ear, get ready, puppet Jim, because you're going to be on camera in about a minute. Really? Okay. I normally don't do much improv. Is there a script? Don't ask me. David Lunch is the wacky director, and so he wants to do it on the spot right here, the first scene of his new movie. Yep. Chris Knotson, here we go. Since we don't have a log, I'm going to have you hold this puppet. This is Jeffrey Beaumont. Say hello to Jeffrey. Hey, Jeffrey, how you doing? He's doing well. He can't talk right now. He's got a bit of the laryngitis, but just be careful because he's a $19,500 puppet. He actually retails at about $40, but I got $19,500 into him. That's my basis, so we got to work with that. Yeah, I'll take good care of him. Okay. Okay, so here's what's going to happen. I want you to look at the puppet, and again, remember, he's not a puppet. He's a piece of wood, and I want you to, like, the wood has now died, okay? This is the last scene. The wood is dying in your arms, and you need to say, you know, how you feel. You've been through a lot, you and this piece of wood. You know, the barn burned down, and, you know, Dad lost the job, and then the tractor, you know, oh, I'm not even going to bring up the tractor, but, you know, just bad times on the farm all around, and now here's the wood leaving this earth, and your dog died as well, and you're only 14. Okay? So just talk to the wood. Okay. Man, we've, gosh, we've just been through so much. You and I, the tractor that we're not supposed to talk about, and I can't believe you're dying now, and this is just really, it's a tragedy, and I'm just, oh, gosh, I'm so young. I'm, like, a teenager, and we're just, dang, man, don't go to heaven yet. I just, we have so much we still need to do. Gosh, I want to go back to the creek with you and jump. We were on that tire swing that, gosh, just the tire swing alone, and just, it's just so much. It's too much, and I can't deal with this right now, so. You know, that wasn't bad. That wasn't bad, Chris Dodson. You got some chops there. You've obviously, I'm impressed. You're good at taking direction. I'm maybe going to cast you in the film. You know, I'm waiting on this funding from Portugal. They want me to get a star, you know, and they said I need to have a steamy girl-on-girl love scene between Naomi Watts and Laura Herring in there as well, but if there's room for you, we can maybe make it work. Thanks for coming in, and we won't tell your manager, I promise. Thanks. I'd really appreciate that about the manager thing, too, because that's probably my biggest concern here is just not letting him know that I'm here. He thinks that I'm somewhere else being productive and getting paid to act. Yep, your secret's safe with us, and if you can just give me the puppet back, my $19,500 puppet, and I'm going to change his diaper. David, what about me? Where's my lines? You're overworking your actor, Chris, and I'm just right here. I feel like I'm on the bench. I'm your star. You are, again, your non-union background, not technically a star. You might be the star of the background. You're my leading extra. What about Uncle Chickster? He's not even in the film. No, wait a second. I just want to say something, Adamo to David. Adamo, you're a poor puppet. You know, if you kick him in the wood heart, you'd break your toe. But, Uncle Chickster, don't you want to be in the film? It's not fair that we're just extras and non-union guys. I want to be in the film. Red lipstick. That's the one, isn't it? I have no idea what you're talking about. You know, he's on to something here. Red lipstick. You know, I've always liked the color red, and I like lipstick. It's an amazing thing. It's a visual image that I want to convey to people. I want it to be in my film. So, Uncle Chickster, if you can find some red lipstick by next Friday, we will shoot a lipstick scene. It can be in the film. You got it. Well, wait a second. Yes! I was in a phone booth. I saw the sign red lipstick. I got curious, and I found something. I went to a thrift shop in Pomona, and I found... I think this is part of the script. Tell me if I'm wrong. Red lipstick is everywhere. Stick it on someone's face. Paint the town red. And don't be a nerd. And give me an encouraging word. I know a cute bird. Whose sign says, Don't disturb. She is always having her lips puckered. And when she walks, she's really hip. I wish her lips were chocolate chip. Is this it, David? Is this the one? Well, I'd like to thank you for preparing your monologue. That's fantastic. But you already got the part. You're cast. You're in. Just bring that lipstick to set. We're on a very tight budget. I'll need you to pay for the lipstick. You will not be reimbursed. But welcome on board. Wait, David. Thank you. I've been practicing really hard. And you turned me into a puppet. And it's not fair that Uncle Chickster gets to deliver a speech. Can I please deliver my monologue to prove to you I'm worthy to be in your film? Well, Chris Dodson set that bar pretty high with his log monologue. But if you think he got something in you, go for it. And remember, the tractor, the farm, the burning down. The tractor, the farm, the burning down. The barn, the loss of the father. There's a lot going on. So go. Okay. Okay. Just give me one minute to prepare. Every actor and every puppet should prepare their vocals. So, hey, DJ, why don't you play another Muppet song? How about Sweet Home Alabama by the Muppets while I prepare my monologue for David Lunch's new film? One, two. Three. Turn it up. Turn it up. Turn it. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I sure wish I wasn't Jimmy the Puppet, baby. I wish I was in your union. I wish, I wish I wasn't a puppet anymore. David? The end. That was an interesting take on the material. What transpired there? You were a, you're no longer a puppet? Are you still, was that in the context of the monologue? I couldn't tell if this was really happening or if that was your acting. That was my acting, David. Wow, that was pretty darn amazing, Adamo. Yeah! Uncle Jigsaw, high five! High five, Adamo! So, do I get the part, David? Well, let's ask Chris Dodson because to be honest with you, I was going to offer him the part. Chris Dodson, is it okay? Yeah, he can definitely have the part. I didn't even want the part really anyway, and it's better if I'm not here and no one mentions that I was here and again that this show just doesn't air anywhere. I'd really appreciate that. Thank you so much. Adamo, you got the part. You're on board. Yes! Oh, sweet. Thank you so much, David. Hey, thanks, Chris. I really appreciate that. I owe you one. No, you really don't. You really don't. You gave me a piece of pizza, and let's just, let's call it even. Thank you. Awesome. Well, boys and girls, that's it for the Adamo podcast, and if you learned anything today, it's that the best puppet is you. Uncle Chickster, what's your final thought? Well, he started at the bottom and sank. Yes! And that's the Adamo podcast. I'm Adam O. That's Uncle Chickster, Una Mars, and, of course, the legendary David Lunch. My final thought, I just want to mention, Una Mars also does birthday parties. She'll do them for free, but I get a piece of cake for every party, and that's it. And that's it, boys and girls. We'll see you next week. Good night. Good night. Good night. Good night.