Christmas sweater special live show preview

No way. Adamo, Adamo, let it rain, let it snow. Here we go, start the show. Breakfast lot, take a bite, make it right. Spaghetti, oh, no, no, no. Wait till lunch, crunch, crunch, crunch my cereal bunch. Adamo, Adamo, six, five, four, three, two, one. Breakfast show. Adamo, Adamo, Adamo, Adamo, Adamo, Adamo, Adamo. Welcome to the breakfast show. This is the Adamo podcast and I'm Adamo, the cereal mascot who changed the face of cereal. And guess what, boys and girls, it's Christmas time. It's the holidays and we are all here at Crispin Organic Cereal Factory and we are here to wish everyone a Merry Christmas. We have the whole gang. That's right. I'm Adamo. I'm Adamo. Next to me is the wonderful Chef Kazooie. Next to Chef Kazooie is the incredible Bingo the Milkman. And of course, all the way from the Enchanted Forest, she's joining us special tonight, boys and girls, a real big treat for Inky the Centaur and Uncle Chickster, the mascot, the cereal face, the 1960s Chicks Crispin Wheel cereal mascot. And of course, my arch nemesis and David Lunch, my arch nemesis and... And rival David Lunch is here with us today. And boys and girls, if you're listening to the Adamo podcast, well, we have a very special live Christmas show for you. That's right. This Sunday, December 18th at the Hollywood Improv Lab at 8156 Melrose Avenue in Los Angeles, California, we have the breakfast show, Christmas sweater special. It's a live kid show created by Adam Shankman, directed by Sam Spadino. And if you want to go to the breakfast show live this Sunday at the Hollywood Improv, well, we have two shows at 11 a.m. and 2 p.m., boys and girls. To get your tickets, go to www.laughstub.com slash improv. slash buy.cfm? I as in I-D equal sign 123509. Everybody got that? And that's at the Hollywood Improv this Sunday, December 18th at 10 a.m. and 2 p.m. at the Hollywood Improv Lab. Tickets are only $10. And I hope to see you there before the show sells out. No. We're going to take it away. We're going to take it away. To a very special treat. And we're going to check in with the one and only David Lunch. Yep. David Lunch here. The special treat, as Adam O. introduced me as. You know, Adam O., I think you might be interested. You know, I do a lot of reading because I'm capable of reading. And in the New York Times, they did a survey recently, and they asked people, would you rather eat lunch or would you rather eat breakfast? Which is your favorite meal? Do you know what the results were? Adam O.? You tell me. Lunch? Be glad to. 100% said lunch. 0% said breakfast. They did a further survey. 75% of people had not even heard of breakfast. So whatever work you're trying to do with your cereal club is obviously highly ineffective. That's great, David. Well, boys and girls, you can see that man at the live breakfast show on October, well, December 18th. One other thing real quick. Barry Manilow, my favorite singer, he went in for a show. He went in for hip surgery today. Just wanted to say, hey, Barry, we're thinking about you. And I'm going to stop hanging out at your house in Palm Springs. I just, I like hanging out there, but I understand you prefer me to keep a certain distance, and I'm going to respect that. But I'm thinking about you and come through on that surgery. Just fine, buddy. I'll see you on Twitter. And that's David Lunch with his weekend update. And of course, boys and girls, if you're listening to this show, we're very grateful to have you listening because we never... We've never actually identified a listener to this day. But we know you're out there, and we know we get 40, 50,000 kids screaming, listening to this show. But I want to say thank you to our sound engineer here at Skid Row Studios for being there through season one of the Adamo podcast. And that's Austin Shankman. Thank you, Austin. Thanks, Austin. And boys and girls, critters and creatures of life, it is Christmas time, and the director, Sam, is breathing over my shoulder as if he has something clever to say as I'm talking into this mic, and it's really annoying me because I like to work with freedom. So, Sam, I'm asking you right now, if you're sitting next to me anymore, chill up. You'll have your turn. Until then, boys and girls, it's Christmas time, and we're going to have a Christmas sweater special at the Hollywood Improv on Sunday, and we can't wait to show off our Christmas sweaters. But most importantly, you will get a gift from Santa Claus. And it's the holidays, and I want to say thank you to my very own family. I want to thank my father, Chickster, Uncle Chickster. I want to say thank you for being the greatest father in the world and to survive another year with you during the holidays. Thank you, Chickster. Thank you, Adamo. And I want to say thank you to my mother, she's in town. She's visiting me here at the factory. And I want to say thank you for providing me with such a wonderful, warm environment to grow up into and to become a kid's show host and make not much money, but to be honest and real around professional actors that join my show and wonder, why? Why am I doing this? But then at the same time, it's because we're going somewhere and we're going somewhere big. And if Rocky won an Oscar, well, I'll win a... I'll win a boat. And I want to say thank you to my wonderful sister who's not married yet, but she'll be married soon. It's been years since we spoke, since she moved out of the crib, cereal crib, moved in with her wonderful boyfriend, Jared, and I'm grateful for all the knowledge that you provide me with this year. And thank you for letting me grow into a dictator that speaks his mind all the time and then learns to listen towards the end of the year. Thank you, April. And I want to thank my good friend, Chris Dotson, the actor, for stopping in once in a while, the breakfast show. Yeah, you guys, you didn't get pizza tonight, huh? No pizza, Chris, but we're honored to have you here at the Skid Row Studios podcast and just being here with us when you have a lot more things that are important to do. Is the pizza on its way or do we need to order it? Okay, moving right along. And of course, I want to say thank you to my arch nemesis, the man that I might not like all the time, but I love him to death. That's David Lunch. Thank you, David. Thank you, Adam O. I don't love you to death either. That's great. And I want to say thank you to the new member of the breakfast show family, our director for the live show that's now sitting at the end of the table, for turning this show into silver when it was bronze. I want to say thank you, to Sam Spadino. Thank you, Sam. Thank you, Adam O. Excited to be part of the breakfast show. And with that said, boys and girls, spend this time with someone you love. Because season two, right around the corner. We got renewed. We got renewed here at the fabulous Skid Row Studios. That's WDW. WDW.SkidRow.LA. And we'll see you in January for season two. This was 2011 season one of the Adam O. Podcast. Very successful podcast. All seven episodes. And thank you to all our listeners. And right now, boys and girls, we'll be right back after this very special astrology forecast for kids. The one and only Una Monserrat. Mars. Good evening. From the very top of Crunch Mountain, bringing it all to you. Hello, everybody. Including mamas and papas, boys and girls, and all cereal lovers on the planet Earth. This is your friendly astrological forecaster, Una Mars. Star light, star bright. First star I see tonight. I wish I may. I wish I might. Have the wish I wish tonight. And happy birthday to all of you Sagittarius on this Tuesday, December 13th, 2011. Here's your forecast. You could be torn between adventure and the status quo this year. If you are attached, a relationship could consume a lot of your energy. Invite your sweetie to join you on some adventure. I'm going to be a little bit late. There you go. Forecaster signing off on behalf of the Adamo Breakfast Show podcast live at Skid Row Studios. See you next week. Good night. And that's Una Mars on the Adamo podcast. Una, thank you very much for joining the Breakfast Show Adamo podcast. Thank you, Adamo. Is that always, is that your voice when you go to the grocery store? This is my voice always. Nice. Sounds like when I used to go to the Disneyland and they had the people mover ride and the announcers would talk to the kids. It was always this voice of the future. Una, what was your best memory of season one on the Adamo podcast? I think I enjoyed watching the show. I think I enjoyed watching the show. I enjoyed watching Adamo wear his fat suit and dancing with Inky, the centaur. That was hilarious. Now I understand you and Inky are related somehow or another. Tell us about that relation. Inky happens to be my daughter from the planet Mars. Great. And Uncle Chixer, what was your favorite memory of 2011 at the Breakfast Show and the Adamo podcast? Well, let's see. There's so many good memories. My favorite memory, I think, was when you sneezed on my shoulder and said, don't worry about it. It'll take its course down my back. That's what I remember the most. Sounds like Uncle Chixer to me. And of course, David Wunsch, same question. My favorite memory of this season was probably about one second, prior to when the season started, when I still had a life, when I didn't have to be in a room with you. And when I was basically, yeah, my whole life prior to season one was fantastic. Now I'm going through a transitional period. I'm looking forward to the break. And we'll take it from there. But it's going to be a ton of fun, Adamo, just a ton of fun. David Wunsch with his wit, looking forward to the break. I am seriously messed up in the head now. I'm on medication. Thanks to the show. But yes, apparently that's a laughing matter. But whatever. Yep. Pray for me. Just everyone, please pray. And of course, David, let me ask you a question. Have you ever listened to one of these podcasts or you just come to the studio and talk? Why would I listen to it? Why would I want to relive it? I'm 65 years old. You sure are, David. I don't listen to podcasts. I don't know how. What kind of car do you drive, David? I have a Maserati. Maserati. Nice. And of course, Inky the Centaur, your favorite memory of 2011 with The Breakfast Show and the Adamo podcast. Well, Adamo, I've only been on the podcast one time. You haven't invited me back since. No, actually, I haven't been in town, but I can't remember one specific time. They all kind of seem quite important. Every show seems to be the most important show. And most important. Most important show of the day and the year. And so I'm always blinded by the show we're working on. It's a lot of importance on this show. I agree. Well, boys and girls, importance is the way you should take things in life. You don't want to just do things halfway or halfway there or halfway or anything halfway. You want to go full, full, full, full, full, full. Everybody wants you to be just like them and sing like them. It's up to you to sing your own voice. And people will drop once in a while. And people will gain. But sometimes you see the light. And you know you only have so many years to live. This is not supposed to be a sad show, boys and girls. This is actually supposed to be a very exciting, wacky, creative show. But if I had one thing on Pee Wee Herman, that one thing would be, more heart. Pee Wee had one thing on me. He's way funnier. But other than that, we're equal. Some people like heart. Okay, can we start the show from the beginning? I think it's fantastic. It's the best show yet. Keep it going. All right. Thank you, David. I needed that. I want to say a couple more words. The last thing I want to do is start it over. Come on. Go ahead. You're talking. Well, I think it's time we do a little special treat for the boys and girls out there. What do you guys say? Would you want to give them a little glimpse of what we've been working on here at the cereal factory? What do you guys say? Yes. Let's give them a taste. Oh, boy. Well, boys and girls, Chef Kazooie, what was your favorite memory of 2011? Oh, I think it's going to be the live show, Adamo. And, of course, Bingo the Milkman, your favorite memory. What was your favorite memory of 2011? Well, Adamo, I had a lot of good times with the cows at the farm. You know, when we brought that cow in the studio, it was pretty exciting, the live milking. Well, I think we give them a little taste of the Christmas sweater special breakfast show. So, take it away, Uncle Chick- Chickster. Yes! Hello, boys and girls. Hello, moms and dads and grandmas and grandpas and all kinds of people out there. Merry Christmas. Yes, my name is Chick Crispin, as you call me, Uncle Chickster, sometimes, but that's okay. That's who I am. Yes! I'd like to welcome you all to Crispin Organic Cereal Factory, home to the most delicious, nutritious breakfast in the world. For 60 years, you know, I've been very faithful. I've been a mascot of the delicious, nutritious Chick Crisp Pinwheels, the cereal with a ribbon of heavenly butterscotch flavors in every morsel bite. The only cereal to turn... ordinary milk into just crunchy pudding. Did I mention it's delicious and nutritious? Yes, I did! We're delighted to have you and all the people with us this year to celebrate the holiday season. Christmas is almost upon us, and now more than ever, boys and girls, you need that yummy cereal to get through the long-waited Christmas morning. So today, if for your early present, we present a special seasonal spoonful of America's favorite morning mascot, the number one talk show for the kids' breakfast show. And without any further ado... Did I step in that again? Yuck! Boys and girls, put your kazoos up in the air. Put them up high! Put them up higher! Put them up higher! Put them up higher! Put them up higher! Put them up higher! Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, critters and creatures, moms and dads, it's time for Adam-O! Adam-O! Adam-O! One, two, three, four! Adam-O! Adam-O! Adam-O! Adam-O! Let it rain! Let it rain! Let it snow! Let it snow! Here we go! Here we go! Start the show! Start the show! Take a bite! Take a bite! Make it right! Make it right! Spaghetti-O! Spaghetti-O! No, no, no! No, no, no! Wait till lunch! Wait till lunch! Crunch, crunch, crunch! Crunch, crunch, crunch! My cereal bowl! My cereal box! My cereal box! Adam-O! Adam-O! Adam-O! Adam-O! Breakfast show! Breakfast show! Mmm! Boys and girls, Merry Christmas! I'm bipolar! Woo! Welcome to the breakfast show! And thank you, Uncle Chickster, for that warm welcome. Boys and girls, we are so happy that you came to celebrate the most wonderful time of the year with us here at the top of Crunch Mountain in the cereal factory in the heart of cereal. This is the cereal factory! Well, this factory has been my home my entire life. And sometimes I wish I could just join you in the outside world. Well, I guess I'm happy here in the cereal factory. That's why I invited all you to my favorite event of the whole year, the annual Christmas Sweater Party! Woo! It's a party! We're having a party! A party! A party! A sweater party! Crazy party! Christmassy! Crispity, crunchity, cereal party. Are you ready? Boys and girls, I am so excited. This monologue will not stop. It's amazing. It's 29 pages. And Adam O., breakfast show. We are here, and we're going to Christmas time. Okay, Uncle Chickster, wait a second. I can't do anything about this show unless I find my sweater. You know what sweater I'm talking about. The sweater that I win first place in every single year at the sweater-wearing party here. Duh. Well, Adam O., uh... You know, the one that's green, blue, red, made from elves in Honduras. But Adam O., I'm colorblind. Of course you're colorblind. You're also ready for retirement, Chickster. Did I... You have to give that away? Chickster, I stopped drinking for this show tonight. I'm sharp as a razor blade. No, the people at Gillette should know that. Chickster, that's personal business. Now, where's my sweater? Adam O., I always keep sweaters in the refrigerator to protect... To protect them from rust and mildew and dangerous sweater poachers. Chickster, I'm ten years old. Where's my sweater? But Adam O., you can't be too careful when it comes to sweater protection, especially with the contest on the line. Contest on the line? Shoot. Deck my halls! David Lunch... David Lunch might win the sweater contest if I don't find my sweater. Aha! There's my treasure chest, the tickled chest. Let me just look for my sweater there. Oops! Don't see it. Here's a beach ball. Oops! Not a beach ball anymore. Oops! There's something a woman uses. Oops! At nighttime. Oops! Oh, no. Poached eggs from Uncle Chickster's breakfast yesterday. Oops! Oh, no. My underwear? Where's my sweater? Chickster? Yes? Are you following the script? I'm trying to, Adam. I... I... You see, I... I can't see. I... It's okay, Chickster. Whatever I do, I don't want to wear a Halloween costume. It's a sweater party. Just need to find my sweater. I'm looking. It's got to be here somewhere. Where? Chickster, have you lost your pinwheels? We're on page three in the middle. Oh, okay. Gee whiz, Adamo. They can't see us. They can only hear us. Don't be so serial-icious. It's okay, Chickster. That's not the word. Sam, could you direct him right now? What's the real word? Speak. Serialicious. Serialdelicious. Ho, ho, ho. Serial's with us. Serial-ious? Is that how you pronounce it? Chris Dawson's an actor. Serialious? Oh, don't be so... Oh, like serious. Serious. Don't be so serialious. But, Adamo, Adamo, it's just a sweater. Uncle Chickster... You can just wear an old Halloween costume. I just repeated that. Let's go a little bit lower. I know, but you can wear a Halloween costume again. Okay, Chickster. No one will notice, believe me. Halloween's the only day... Well, you can... People accept me. I can wear whatever I want. Well, you can knock on many doors, Adam, and still make a big success of your life. Wait. I have an idea, Uncle Chickster. If I can't find my sweater, maybe the boys and girls in the cereal club, well, maybe they can help me find my missing sweater. What do you say, cereal club? Will you help me find it? Well, maybe you can look around in the closet and find your sweater. Is that Sid Cobbler speaking? Yes, how did you know? I'm here. I wanted to always get on The Breakfast Show, but you would never... You never let me get into the show, so I just took a chance and I walked right into the door, and here I am. Sid Cobbler, boys and girls. Sid Cobbler, what's the scariest thing that's ever happened to you in your life? When I saw your face. Whatever, dude. Moving right along, this is where I sing a song from Weezer. Hi, kids. How are you? Have you seen my sweater? Me neither. Did you hear about the Christmas show? Yeah. I was really excited, but I'm bummed. Because I can't... Can we get some kazoo, please? Find my sweater. Santa gave it to me. Everybody. I'm me. Maybe. Adam. I am. I can't see anything. Clearly can't believe that I lost my sweater. And the song keeps going. Okay, moving right along. And we're on page six, boys and girls. If you have a script at home, which I doubt you have, but soon you will, because you have an imagination. Boy, all this talking and singing, Uncle Chickster, sure is making me hungry. Yes. You know, you gotta worry about belly lint these days. You can always eat belly lint. Of course, I love to collect that stuff. Chickster, why is this belly lint coming out of my belly? It's never seen this much before. Yuck. Well, I don't know. I know you eat a lot of cereal, and I know you eat a lot of... I know you hang around closets, and sometimes out of both ways. I hang around closets? Let's back that... Well, I mean... Let's back that up a little bit. That's where you pick up the lint, or, you know, something like that. You should... Okay, Chickster, that's not my sweater. That's just belly button lint. Sweaty old ball of lint. Now I need to eat. Deck my halls. Oh, my gosh. What's that sound? Oh, my gosh. It must be Chef Kazooie. Wow. I could only mean one thing, boys and girls. It's crunch time with our very own Iron Chef, Chef Kazooie. Hello, Adamo. You must be hungry. Oh, you bet, Chef Kazooie. What do you got cooking today? Any special holiday breakfast treats? Why, yes, Adamo. I've been working all month. Oh, my gosh. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry. You're working all month on a new cereal. I call it Christmas Crunch. Christmas Crunch? Milk a cow and give it shoes? That's amazing. Hey, wait a second. Wasn't your last holiday creation called Christmas Crunch? No. That was Thanksgiving Turkey Twisters. Oh, but Turkey Twisters turn milk into delicious gravy. Woo hoo! How could it be possibly better? It's much better. I use an ancient holiday recipe and a little magic. Oh, magic? Oh, I'd love some. Oh, boy, Chef Kazooie. I'm too cheap to get a real sound engineer, so I make sounds up myself by going... Wow, it tastes like pine trees, snow, and ginger bread. Yes. Wait a second. It's turning. It tastes like candy now. Cotton candy. And Chester's nuts. Chestnuts. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Now drink the milk. Milk? But you're a serious... Oh, I love it, Chef Kazooie. Hey, Chester, wait till you try Christmas Crunch. It'll make you feel like a holiday. It sounds scrumptious. And look, it made you forget about your missing sweater. Oops. Oh, no. No, that's right. Wait, Chef Kazooie. I can't find my sweater. It's Christmas. Have you seen it? No, I've been busy making Christmas Crunch. But I have an idea. Maybe you look inside the box. You can find what you need. Oh, yeah? Well, can I check? I don't think my sweater will be in there. Lights? Deck my halls! I can't wear these. I'm not a tree for Christmas' sake. No, you're a growing boy. Yes, you are a pine, young man. Exactly. I agree with Chester. Enough jokes. This is no leafing matter. Seriously, I need to find my sweater. The party's starting soon. Go stress, and I'm starting to itch. Well, I have one idea. Why don't you ask your other serial friend? Hey, I'm falling apart like a cheap suit. Come on. What about Inky? Oh, my gosh. Not now. Not now. Wait, yes, now. Uh, Inky. Here, take this box. Inky Tales. Oh, thank you, Chef Kazooie. Boys and girls, maybe Inky could help me find my Christmas sweater. As I read the box, Inky Tales is a part of this mythical, delicious breakfast. It's a complete part of four-legged, balanced breakfast. Whatever color your skin is, even if you only have two legs, you will enjoy this enchanted flavors every spoonful. They're centaurific. They're centaurific. Whether you're on one end of the world or whether you're in America, we're all equal. Whether you're Jew or Gentile, we're together. And that's what Inky stands for, and that's what Adam O. stands for. Kids, you know what a centaur is? Hey, Chickster, do you know what a centaur is? Yes, the centaur of attention. Just kidding. It's government. No, Chickster, not a senator. A freaking centaur. You know what I mean? It's like... Half horse, half robot. Well, centaurs serve staggered six-year-old terms. Uncle Chickster, let's try to bring up Inky now, thank you very much. Now, our friend Inky is a girl centaur. But most importantly, she is the most beautiful centaur in the enchanted forest. And she stands for equal rights. And boys and girls and I stand for equal rights. And I wonder if she knows what happened to my sweater. Should we summon her for some enchanted forest? On Crunch Mountain and bring her to the breakfast show? Kids, what do you think? Yeah! Yeah, that sounds good, Adam. And boys and girls. Inky the centaur! Yay! Hello, Adamo, and Merry Christmas. It's super splendid to see you again. Thanks for inviting me. Hi, Inky. Haven't seen you in a centaur-y. Oh, that's a good one, Adamo. That's a real hope-stopper. Hey, speaking of hooves. Hey, what are you wearing on your feet, Inky? Why, those are my custom-made Christmas stockings. Aren't they just dazzling? Now, not only are they dazzling, they keep my centos warm when I'm prancing through the snow in the forest. So I'm nice and hosy. Love you, Inky. Hey, the sure hour festive. Reminds me, are you coming to the party tonight? Oh, but of course I am. Why, I've been working on my party of it all week. Who knows, maybe this year I'll win the award for best Christmas sweater. Adamo, what's the matter? Did I say something wrong? I can't find my sweater and it's really spoiling my Christmas. I've been looking for it everywhere. Oh, I see. Every day and everywhere. Do you have any idea where it is, Inky? Oh, I'm sorry, Adamo, I don't. I've been working really hard decorating the enchanted trees in the forest for Christmas. But you see, Adamo, enchanted trees don't wear nifty sweaters like you and me. They prefer to have designer ornaments. You know, from Valentrino and Versace, to name a few. You see, it's their one chance in the year to dress up all fancy. And since they're stuck in the ground, by natural default, of course, it's the centaur's job to have to do the decadent dressing. Oh, that sounds like a lot of work, Inky. Oh, well, it's the least we can do for the trees since they work tirelessly all year producing oxygen for us to breathe. Oh, but it's good exercise carrying all those ornaments and reaching all the treetops. Speaking of exercise and movement, I want to share with you my new holiday gift. I created it for the Winter Solstice Festival this year. Can I share it with you, Adamo? Oh, boy, I would love to. See it. Oh, yes, I'm glad. You see, each year, us creatures of the Enchanted Forest put together an extravaganza of entertainment to welcome the winter season. As you know, centaurs aren't the only magical creatures in the forest. Why, we have elves and trolls and wishniks and even fairies. Why, it's the sugar plum fairies that are responsible for making the winter season. They're responsible for making my cereal, Inky Tails, extra sweet. They even have a famous song right after them, named right after them. It's called, well, it's called, it's called the Sugar Plum Fairy Sweet and the Nutcracker. The Nutcracker? Ouch! What does he do? Why, he gives the Inky Tails a delicious nutty crunch, silly. Sounds like a show of a job. Get it? Not so. Oh, yeah, I get it, Adamo. Sure I do. Now, back to the Winter Solstice Festival. As I was saying, this year for my performance, I decided to do a collaboration with the Sugar Plum Fairies using a song from the Nutcracker. I call it the Inky Plum Fairy. Whoa, can't wait to see it. Cereal Club, I'm joining you to watch this. Take it away, Inky. Oh, well, okay. See, you'll have to come to the live show to see me do the dance. It's really something special. But for right now, I'll just do a little, I'll just do a little tune for you. Hey, Inky, real fast. Yes, Adamo? When's the live show? Oh, the live show is December 18th at the Hollywood Improv at 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. Oh, boys and girls, you really gotta come see me dance. I've got a special tutu and all. It's really something special. And boys and girls, you can call 323-651-2583 to get your tickets at the Hollywood Improv, 8156 Melrose Avenue, Los Angeles, California. That's 323-651-2583. Tickets are $10. Get your tickets online at LaughStub. Type in The Breakfast Show. And, Inky, back to you. We even have a show for the early birds, Adam, at 11 a.m. Let's see who the early birds are. Let's see who they are indeed. Okay, Inky. As they say, the early birds get all the worms. Don't they say that, Adamo? They do, Inky. I can't wait to hear your song. Oh, but, Adamo, the orchestra, the fairies didn't come to the studio. They can't get around downtown too well, so they're just gonna have to come to the live show. I'm sorry. That's just all there is to it. Okay, Inky, can you just please sing us a song? Oh, Adamo. How about Jingle Bells? Oh, okay. Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Inky? Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah, I think that's a good singing song for now. Inky, look at the way your head spins. It looks like a dreidel. Oh, that's a good one, Adamo. Look at me spin just like a dreidel. Let's see you spin like a dreidel. Oh, are you sure, Inky? Okay, fine. I would love to. Whoa, Adamo, you're shedding. Oh, wow, you're shedding some beautiful yarn. Oh, can I have it to put on my bed? Oh, can I have it to put on my favorite tree, please? Whatever, Inky. I can't figure out where all this is coming from anyways. I just wish I could find my sweater, but so far the kids haven't helped me at all. I told them to say ho, ho, ho as a secret code any time they see my sweater, but no one said ho, ho, ho yet, so I guess no one's seen my sweater, Inky. Well, don't worry, Adamo. I'm sure it'll turn up. And anyways, you know, I gotta go get ready for the party right now, so thanks for having me on the show, and I'll see you soon at the party, okay? Bye-bye. Bye, Inky. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Inky the centaur. Yay. Yay. Boys and girls, we'll be right back after David Lunch's thought on the first part of the breakfast show's Christmas special. Take it away, David. Well, as usual, not enough lunch was featured, and basically, yeah, I mean, I think we can probably lose these first two. We can probably lose these first 12 pages here entirely, and just start on, well, actually, we can start on page 20. I think that's when I come in, 20, 21, somewhere in there. I think the show will be a lot tighter, a lot smoother, a larger focus on lunch. I think that's what the people want, and you know, you gotta give the people what they want, so those are the thoughts, and yeah, you know, you can come to the show about 20 minutes late, everyone, and you'll still, you'll be picking up right in the meat of the show right around the time I come in. So, show starts at 1120 and 220. We'll be right back. And 220 on the 18th at the Melrose Improv, wait, it's the Improv Lab on Melrose. Boys and girls, it's actually 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. at the Improv Lab on Melrose, December 18th. Thank you, David. Rejoining the breakfast special, Adam O. has just realized he's all out of milk. Well, boys and girls, yeah, I'm really thirsty now, and I just don't really, don't know what to do because it's a cereal factory. Hey, Chef Kazooie, hey, maybe you could help me. You have any milk for me? I'm thirsty. Very simple, Adam O. Call the milkman. The milkman? Are you sure? Who's the milkman? Oh, my gosh, you're kidding me. Are you thinking about my good friend Bingo? How could I forget Bingo? Oh, his picture is right here on the milk carton, boys and girls. Oh, our delicious milk here at the Crispin Organic Cereal Factory comes from Happy Cow Ferry Farms, owned and operated by Bingo, the milkman. Oh, I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. He knows every cow by name and treats them like family. Oh, he's such a great guy. And there's also a song about him, and I bet if we sing that song, he might just come to life and join us today. One, two, three, four. There was a milkman, had a cow, and Bingo was his name. Oh, B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O, Bingo. Oh, my gosh. B-I-N-G-O, and Bingo was his name. Oh. Boys and girls, it's Bingo, the milkman. Adamo, I heard you were looking for some milk. Sure am, Bingo. Hi. How are you and moo-y Christmas? Moo-y Christmas to you and happy moo-year. No puns intended. It's good to see you. Good to see you too, Bingo. Now, can I have a glass of milk, please? Adamo, not so fast. Don't you want to hear about my cows? All right. How's Bessie? Bessie is beside herself with Christmas cheer. Bessie. Bessie is twice as nice and full of spice. Bessie, the lesbian. Bessie is lovely. Less fat than the last time. She's really skimmed down. You're right. Okay, whatever. I'm not going to be that much of a punk. It is Christmas. What about little Muna Lisa? Oh, Muna Lisa. Muna Lisa, Muna Lisa. The most beautiful cow in the world. Ah, she's been trimming the tree. Oh, that's great, trimming the tree. Oh, that's great. Trimming the tree. Get it? Ha ha. Okay, well, how about some milk now, please? Adamo, it's the holidays. We've stopped milk production completely. No. Adamo, relax. Relax. It means we got a new product. You're going to love it. All right, I call it eggnog. Eggnog? That's right, eggnog. Sounds weird, Bingo. I'd rather just stick to good old, you know, MILK, if you know what I mean. Well, if you know what I mean, eggnog is kind of like milk. Yeah. But it's got special ingredients. Uh, special ingredients? Like what? Ah, well, uh, I could show you how it's made if you, uh, if you really want me to show you. Uh, yeah, I would love for you to show me, but can I just get a glass of milk, please? Listen. Milk comes from cows, am I right? But eggnog comes from Christmas cows. Christmas cows? Never heard of such a thing. Well, I gotta give my cows a vacation once in a while, and these Christmas cows come all the way from the North Pole. Oh, that's a-moozy. You bet. It's a-moozy. It's a-moozy. It's a-moozy. It's a-moozy. It's a-moozy. Hey, Chickster, top of page 17, if you know what I mean. Page, uh, bingo! 17? I'm sorry. You guys are going moo-far with these utterly ridiculous jokes. Hmm. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Hmm. You're right, Chickster. It's time to moo-ve on. Listen, Adam-o, we're going to go right ahead and get to the secret ingredient, eggs. Eggs? Yeah, they come from a cow. Oh, man. Really? I just want some milk. Hmm. But okay, okay, okay, fine, fine, fine. Here's the thing. Once we get our egg, it's a complicated process, but every Christmas cow knows it, and, uh, we add that to the egg. The milk, and then we put in some cinnamon, nutmeg, maybe some vanilla. Now taste this. Oh, oh my gosh. It tastes like Christmas. It tastes like pine trees. Wait, now it's turning. Now it's starting to taste like cotton candy. Listen, it's like nothing you've ever tasted, am I right? You're right, Bingo. It's amazing. I've never tasted anything like this. Hey, what's the other special ingredient? Well, maybe sometimes, you know, once you get a little older, you can add a little Christmas spirit to it. What's that? You know, sometimes you keep a bottle of it around in the medicine chest. I'm Jewish. Hey, it's delicious. I'm sure you know. Whatever, maybe David Lunch will know about that. Ask him later. Well, could be worse, Adam. You could be all out of milk, but now you have a lifetime supply of eggnog. Oh, man, that's so sweet of you, Bingo. I love eggnog. And you know what? Thank you for introducing me to eggnog. You bet. I'll see you at the party tonight in your sweater, I bet. Um, no. Listen, Bingo, I can't find my sweater. And without my sweater, I don't know what to do. Uh, well, you'll probably think of something, am I right? Adam, oh, you always come up with something. No, you don't understand, Bingo. Chef Kuzma. Zui. Inky the Centaur. Uncle Taster in the Cereal Club. No one's helping me. I'm running out of time. I always win first place in the sweater competition. And now, well, okay, you know what? I'm grateful. Thanks for the eggnog, Bingo. Hey, listen, I gotta go. But, uh, cheer up, Adam, okay? I will cheer up. Okay, fine, Bingo. Thank you very much. M-I-L-K. Milk! Now what am I gonna do? Now what am I going to do? Now what am I going to do? Hey, Uncle Chickster? Yes? Maybe I could just ask you one more time if you have any ideas. I'm out of ideas, but I have a hunch this could be the work of your foe, David Lunch. Oh, of course. My arch nemesis. An enemy to breakfast. Master storyteller, David Lunch. Why didn't I think of that? Oh, he probably wants to sabotage me and win the contest. I bet he took my sweater. Kazooie! Do you have a box of the weirdest cereal in the factory? Twin Loops? Yes, right here. Whoever heard of cereal you eat at lunchtime? It tastes like a tuna sandwich and turns milk into chicken broth. Yuck! No wonder he quit making it. Well, he didn't quit. I told the factory owners to stop making it, and we quit making it. Because, of course, every box. It's covered in blue velvet. Well, kids, I hate to do this to you. You know, here it goes. Dum-dum. Dum-dum. Well, well, well. Merry Christmas, everyone. Hello, Adam-O. I understand you're still hanging out around closets. David Lunch, storyteller here at your service. Tell me, are you ready to open your mind to the power of lunch? Are you ready to expand your consciousness and admit that lunch is indeed the most important meal of the day? I just need to ask you one question, David. Will you give me a straight answer so we can move on with the show and I can get ready for the party tonight? I can do that. Straight answers are my specialty. I would love to answer a question because, you know, after all, it's with questions that we begin to understand the nature of the world around us and can begin to grasp the power of lunch and the ancient wisdom within. Hey, I'm not letting you take over my show. I mean, with all your crazy luncheon ideas. Now tell me, David, did you or did you not take my Christmas sweater? Hmm. Did I take your Christmas sweater? Did I take your Christmas sweater? Let's think about this, Adam-O. What is a sweater, after all, but a collection of thread woven together by an apparent pattern of organization derived from the mind of the grandmother or sweater master who knit it together based on a working knowledge of needlecraft and ultimately the universe of work? Yes. Yes. Which we are all a part. So to answer your question, technically your sweater, as you call it, is my sweater. Listen here, lunch. I know you took my sweater so you could win the best sweater contest at the party tonight. Don't try to deny it. Talk your way out of it. Not sure why you're talking like Ava Gardner. Adam-O, please, I have nothing to hide. I know you may not trust me after I tried to turn the breakfast show into the lunch special, even though I think everyone here will agree that that would make a much more entertaining, and thought-provoking television program that would capture the hearts and minds of young and old alike. I am, after all, a master storyteller and one of the most brilliant minds of the 20th century. Where is my sweater, lunch? This reminds me of the time that I was on the set of my science fiction epic, Noon, set in the far future in an interstellar utopian empire, where the sun rises at noon each day and humans enjoy delicious sandwiches and soups for the first meal of the day. In the film, the most highly prized character, the most famous commodity in the empire, is a very rare potato salad from a desert planet. Anyway, I was discussing a scene with Kyle. I'm talking about Kyle MacLachlan, of course, and I said to him, Kyle, I want you to imagine that you are trapped in a world without air conditioning, and you are wearing the thickest wool sweater ever woven. So naturally, it was this brilliant piece of direction that helped him achieve a level of believability that would otherwise have been impossible. Enough! Who wants my sweater? I don't want it. I want to hear your crazy stories. No one gets them anyways. Please just tell me where it is. Adamo, the only advice I have for you is to look inside yourself for the answers and stop blaming others. I know you have a closet fetish, but maybe if you filled your belly with a cheeseburger and fries once in a while instead of cereal, you could see more clearly. You know, you're really grasping at straws here. If you think I have nothing better to do than sneak around and steal sweaters. I make music and films. We're talking art here. I tell stories. I spend time with important minds having power lunches and discussing interesting things. I don't run around grabbing sweaters. I build sweater factories and I burn them to the ground and toast marshmallows over the ashes. And then I eat the marshmallows for lunch. I'm speaking metaphorically. Of course, kids don't start fires. Arson is a crime. Do you have my sweater or not? No. What's this? Looks like your patience is unraveling. I'm going to wrap you up with this David lunch. You're wrapping me with your sweater that's unraveling and you're tying it around me and now I'm all wrapped up. Looks like you are all tied up lunch. Now just please leave me alone. Okay, I'll see you at the party. That's fine. But right now you're distracting me. Okay, Adam. Oh, you're frustrated. So my job here is clearly done. Just remember you can skip the party altogether. And I'll gladly take home the prize. And I'll get your best sweater. But at the same time, I'd love to see you lose your lunch. Get it? Lose your lunch? My wife never lets me make puns at home. I love this place. Ladies and gentlemen, is this the end of the breakfast show as we know of it? I hope so. Well, let me tell you a thing or two. Will Adamo ever find his lost sweater? Will David Lunch win the contest? Will Christmas be ruined? Is there any way to cheer up Adamo and help get him into the Christmas spirit? Perhaps I can help. Ladies and gentlemen, T.J. Miller. Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Adamo! Wow, it's T.J. Miller. What are you doing here, T.J.? I heard you were feeling sad, and I thought maybe some comedy would cheer you up. That would be great, yes. That's my line, yes. This is just what the breakfast show needs, right, kids? Well, thanks for having me on your show, Adam-O. Wish I could stay for the party, but I have millions of other people to go entertain. You understand. I hope you find your sweater, but just remember, even if you don't, you can still have fun with the people you love, and that's what the holidays are all about. Am I right? Yes, you're right, T.J. Thanks, T.J. Thank you very much. Well, boys and girls, T.J. Miller is just going to do a set of couple jokes for us right now, and I guess you're right, T.J., you're right, you're right. The guests will be here any minute, so listen to T.J.'s jokes. Wow. We all get changed for the Christmas sweater party. T.J., take it away. I don't actually have any jokes prepared, Adam-O. If you guys could just change as quickly as possible, that would be great. I'll just, you just change your clothes. I can help you if you need it. I'd rather, I prefer to help you get dressed if I could. Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun Come on down. Oh, my God. Good. Very festive, Inky. Red and white stripes. I like it. I like it. Oh, thank you. Thank you. How about Chef Kazooie? Come on out. Wow, Chef, looking very, very good in your... What is that? Are those diamonds? Are those real diamonds? Oh, yes. Yes, they are. Coming up next, it looks like we got David Lunch in the back. Come on out, David Lunch. What are you wearing tonight? I'm wearing the best holiday sweater ever made. We got a snowball fight going on here. We got two reindeer mating over here. We got snowflakes all over the place. Hand me the money right now. Show me the money. I got to say, I'm impressed you really brought it this year, but we still have one more to check out. And this guy always, always wins. I've never seen it. But Adam O is here, everybody. Put your hands together. Adam O. Adam O. Wait a minute. Adam O. Would you just move on? Come on, stop... Okay, listen. Sorry, guys. Sorry to scare you guys, but listen. I just couldn't find my sweater. Thanks to T.J. Miller, he convinced me that I could just wear an old Halloween costume. Get it? Halloween costume, third time in the script. I look ridiculous, but I still want to have fun with you all. And you know what? Can we still party? Sure, Adam O. We're your friends. Absolutely. Well, I'm not, and it wouldn't be a party without you. Okay, will someone help me take this monkey suit off? Sure. Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. What's all this coming out of the costume here? This look is yarn. I don't know. Whatever I was wearing before, I guess. Listen, it's dark in the closet where I was changing. I got to tell you, Adam O, this looks a lot like it's coming out of a sweater. My... Dun, dun, dun. My... My precious. My sweater. My sweater. My sweater. My sweater. My sweater. My sweater. My sweater. My sweater. I had it on the whole time. Oh, my gosh. I'm such an idiot. It's ruined, though. I've been so preoccupied with finding it, I didn't realize I was unraveling it the whole time, kids. Can you believe it? Oh, wow. Oh, I should have listened to you, Cereal Club, Uncle Chickster, Inky the Centaur, Chef Kazooie, and even David Lunch even told me that I had my sweater on. It's okay. You were preoccupied. Oh, wait. It doesn't look that bad. It doesn't look that bad. TJ, thank you so much for giving me those inspirational words. TJ, what do you think I should do at this point? I just think you look great, Adam O, and I just like you as you are. Inky, what do I do? Oh, Adam O, I think you're just fine. Well, thanks, guys, but I know you're just trying to make me feel better. I'm not. I'm not. You know, I always knew you had a hairy chub. I know you have a hairy chest, but this is ridiculous. Listen, guys, I got to break in right here. This is Sam Spadino, the director. If we go any further, we're going to ruin the ending of this show. And if the kids want to find out what happens, they're just going to have to come out and see it live. Am I right? I win, and everyone carries me out on their shoulders at the end triumphantly. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. And, of course, Chickster's final thought. Yes, my final thought. What does it mean when the flag at the post office is flying at half mast? They're hiring. And that's Uncle Chickster. This was The Breakfast Show Christmas Sweater Special. Stay tuned for the live show to find out what happens at the end. We would love you to meet us live at the show. You can sit on Chickster Claus' lap and take a picture with him. And, of course, you'll see David Lunch, Inky the Centaur, Sam Spadino, the director of The Breakfast Show. I'm Adam O. Una Mars will be there live taking pictures. And thanks to our sound man, Austin Shankman, and Skid Row Studios for having us. And we just want to say thank you for all our listeners here on Season 1 at The Breakfast Show Adam O Podcast. And have a happy, happy holidays and a Merry Christmas. And we'll see you in 2012. I love you. And at the live show, December 18th, 11 a.m., 2 p.m., The Hollywood Improv. The Anime Improv Lab. See you there, kids. Good morning and eat your breakfast. Mm-hmm.