Thanksgiving special with Chris Dotson and mustache talk

Thank you. Take a bite. Woo-hoo! Yay! Yay! Oh, boys and girls, you know what time it is. It's Thanksgiving time, and I'm Adam O., and we're at the world's famous Skid Row Studios.com. Or you can go to www.skidrow.la, and you can listen to us live. If you're listening to this on iTunes, we're on the air every Tuesday at 8 p.m. at Skid Row Studios. That's www.skidrow.com. And I want to give a big thank you to our sound guy for helping us out. He's a world-class sound guy, and he is running the boards here at Skid Row Studios for the Adam O. Podcast. That's Austin Shankman. Yay! Yay! Yes, and of course, next to me is my sidekick, the one and only, the legendary cereal mascot who changed the face of cereal, who changed the face of breakfast, and who changed the face of Adam O. It's Uncle Chickster! Yes! Yes, hello, everybody. I'm very happy to be here. Of course, some changes happened to me. Well, I didn't shave Adam O. No. No, I grew a mustache. In fact, what inspired me was, well, just about three weeks ago, I went to that cafe, the mustache cafe in Hollywood, the mustache cafe. Uncle Chickster, I got to say, man, that's a pretty cool thing you got on your face. What's it called again? A must? It's a cookie, cookie. No, you said something with the M-U, mustache. What is it, a mustache? It's a mustache. A mustache. Boys and girls, if you don't know what a mustache is, Uncle Chickster's wearing it on his face. Kind of comes off his face about an inch off his face, and it's really hairy and furry. Exactly. It's weird looking, but I like it a lot. All right. And I want to, I want to learn more about mustaches, and what's that sound next to me? Oh my gosh, boys and girls, right next to me is the world famous storyteller and my arch rival. It's David Lunch, and he has a weird thing on his face too, like Uncle Chickster. David Lunch, what's that on your face? Adamo, it's called a mustache. It's been around, they've been around a long time. I'm not sure why you haven't heard of this before. Kind of like me discovering punk rock music last week. Thought I was onto something new there. Turns out it had been around since the 1970s. But mustaches have been around even longer than that, Adamo. So, you know, get with the program. They're also referred to as, what'd you say, Uncle Chickster, cookie dusters? Exactly. David Lunch, I'm 10 years old. I can't grow a mustache. I forget your age sometimes, Adamo. I'm sorry. So to answer your question, a mustache is facial hair grown on the outer surface of the upper lip. I think you're out of your mind. I'm out of your mind, David. Um, no, I'm really, I'm really not. I mean, Uncle Chickster's wearing a mustache. You're a real famous storyteller and you're usually really, what is it, clean cut? And now you have this mustache. But actually, you know what? You were inspiring me last week about punk rock music. And now, yeah, I'm kind of digging this whole thing. I could probably grow one overnight. Well, I don't know about that, Adamo, because as you said, you're 10 years old. Might be a little tough. But I'm going to give you some tips as to how to grow a mustache. Hey, are you listening here? Well, David, I'm not really 10 years old. Oh, okay. Well, you look like it. Here's what you're going to do. Kids, if you want to grow a mustache, number one, purchase an iguana. An iguana? Why an iguana? I'll get to it. 30 days later, start drinking a lot of soy milk. When you've drunk the soy milk, stand next to a heat lamp. Now, you might need to take a lot of time away from school for this, okay? This is an investment. This is an investment. Facial hair is, is something that should not be taken lightly. If you want to grow it, you want to cultivate it, especially at an age when it's nearly impossible to grow it, you're going to want to make the commitment, okay? So just tell your parents you're going to be in your room for a few months. You're not going to go to school. You're not taking any calls. You're not sending any text messages. And you're not doing the, whatever the other things are that the kids do, not going to happen. And then at the, roughly, you know, after about 70 days, you will have facial hair. And that's David Lunch with the rules of how to grow a mustache. That's how you do it. Look it up. Oh, well, Uncle Chickster, what do you think about those fine rules from David Lunch on mustaches? No, it makes a lot of sense. You know, cookie dusters, basically, I, you know, I tried out my cookie duster and I shared it with Molly Maid. All right, Uncle Chickster. I've done that before, too. I can vouch for that. That's a real thing. The Molly Maids are into cookie dusters. So something to look forward to, Adamo, when you mature and are no longer 10 years of age. Okay, well, let's start with the iguana, the iguana rule one, because I'm going to try an iguana. Hey, speaking of iguanas, maybe your personal assistant, Lunch, Miss Mars over here. Hi, Miss Mars. Boys and girls, welcome, Miss Mars. Oh, hi, everybody. I'm Una Mars. Hey, Una Mars. So, you know, you are David Lunch's assistant just for this episode due to the fact that he got lost coming here because he comes here every week, but that's David Lunch for you. I'm not good with directions. That's why I have an assistant and it's a wise investment. Okay, well, Miss Mars, so tell me about the mustache. What does an iguana have to do with a mustache? Most iguanas want to have, have a mustache. They try to grow one, but it doesn't happen. So this month, all iguanas are working very hard to grow a mustache. Is that right, David? Yep, couldn't have said it better myself. There you go. What's your next question, Adamo? Well, do you have an iguana? Do I have an iguana? Uh, no. She's not interested in growing a mustache, is she? No, of course she doesn't own one. Well, then I can't do rule number one, can I, David? Um, don't know why you can't. Um, just because my assistant doesn't want to grow a mustache doesn't mean you can't. Well, if she had an iguana here, that would have helped me try to put an iguana on my face. Oh, point taken. Well, you know, like I said, it's a 70-day process. It's not going to happen overnight, but, um, but I appreciate your interest and your, um, your ambition. That's going to go a long way into, uh, growing the facial hair. Okay, well, don't worry about it. I'm growing facial hair as we speak. It's blowing in the wind. No, it's not. Whatever. Whatever, David. It's not like you could really grow a mustache anyways. It looks like a spider web. Well, I tell you what, Adamo, I am actually entering into a mustache tournament the weekend after Thanksgiving out in Pomona, California. There's going to be over 17 people participating in this tournament. It's like, um, one of those deals where you just, you go stand on the stage and then, you know, they pick, um, I guess they just, they pick the person with the best mustache and then someone's declared a winner and you receive a ref, a raffle ticket, which will enter, be entered into a drawing, um, of a prize that's to be determined. So, obviously, this is a pretty lucrative thing. I'm very excited about it. I only had to pay $300 to sign up for the tournament and I'm looking forward to, uh, claiming the raffle ticket for an undisclosed prize that I might not win. That's terrific, David. I have no idea what you're talking about, but I want to join, too. Um, I'll see if I can get you on the list, but, you know, without, uh, uh, the facial hair, it might be tough to get in, but I'll do it. I'll do what I can. Did you not hear me? I'm growing three pieces of hair as we speak on my lower left cheek. Okay, I can tell by your insistence that you want me to be encouraging, and, and I will do that. Yes, you, um, you have three nice little, uh, little hair things going on there, and, um, good job. You're showing a lot of promise. Thanks, David. Well, let's skip to a rule that will actually help me grow more than three hairs on my face. So, so give us rule number four. What was rule number four, David? Talking to me? Uncle Jixxer. Uh, rule number four? What is rule number four? Were there four rules? I was making it up. I don't, I don't know. Rule number four. Uncle Jixxer, you have a, uh, fourth rule to add, right? It's like the fourth, uh, wall? Well, all, all I know is that everyone was, uh, singing in a, a Hawaiian strain. How's that gonna help me with a mustache, Uncle Jixxer? Well, you see, everybody had it on their brain, Adamo. When, uh, this Yotka Kiki, uh, hula-doo was all the craze. Uh, you know, you know that that's the one that had him dazed? The object now, Adamo, is for something new, something that will appeal to you and you and everyone else. Here's a little melody that you will find. Well, it'll always linger on my mind. Jada, jada, jada-dada-dada-da. I said jada, jada, la-da-da-da-da-da-da. Boys and girls, don't worry. We're not on drugs. It's called mustaches. That's called rule number four. You asked for it, Adamo. There it was. Rule number four. That's great, David. Rule number four. Okay, I don't know about this mustache idea after all. You know what, Adamo? Let me, let me help you here. You might need a little focus because, you know, you, you wanna grow a mustache. That's great. But sometimes you need to know what kind of mustache you wanna grow. Okay? So I'm gonna give you a list of potential mustaches. There's a natural mustache. There's a Mexican mustache. There's a Dali mustache. There's an English mustache. Of course, there's an imperial mustache. And then my personal favorite here, the freestyle, uh, freestyle mustache, which apparently means anything goes. Just, um, in fact, you might already have one. If you have three hairs, maybe you can call that a freestyle mustache. I don't know. Well, don't worry. Give me, you know, a couple minutes and it'll be full growing. Um, I still have no idea how you're gonna accomplish that. But in the meantime, let me tell you about the Mexican mustache, um, from, uh, Wikipedia here. Um, it describes it as being big and bushy, beginning from the middle of the head. Then down to the force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force force Probably. Okay. Well, boys and girls. Hey, what's going on here? Is somebody trying to make fun of me because I have a big, thick mustache? And that's Uncle Chickster trying to pretend he's, what do they call him? Luma Luchas, the Mexican wrestler announcer. Pretty cool, Chickster. Good job. I really like Mexican wrestling. It's pretty cool. Thank you. And, of course, Miss Luna, what do you have to say about the Mexican mustache? Well, my saying is star light, star bright for star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight. If you want to grow a mustache, stand under the star light and your wish will come true. And that has a lot to do with the Mexican mustache. Thank you, Luna. Or what's your name again? Una Mars. Una Mars. Makes perfect sense to me. David Luchas' assistant. That was great. Thank you. That's why she gets the big bucks. David, I don't know. I think I could take you in this competition. Where is it again? Pomona, California? Going to Pomona. It's just off the 10. I believe you could also take the 60. I haven't been out that way very much. Last time I was there, it rained and it was dark. Didn't get a really good feel for the town, but I understand they have a great fair, and I imagine they have an incredible mustache tournament as well. Well, have you seen my face in the last two minutes, David? Look. I'm going to be pretty, and you're going to be surprised. One, two, three. Not looking? You know I prefer not to look at you whenever possible. Whatever, dude. You want me to make an exception? Yes, I do. All right. Because I am growing something special. Okay, do it again. Do the countdown, whatever it is. One, two, three. Oh, boy. This is hideous. I wish I hadn't looked. What is it you'd like me to see here, Adam? What do you mean? Yes. You don't see it? No. Look closer. It's obvious, right? Oh, okay. Yes, you have a mustache. That is right, boys and girls. It's a mustache. Yeah. And guess what? It's in the shape of a pizza. Yep, it's in the shape of a pizza. Listen to everything he says. It's the entire truth. Uncle Jason, what do you think about my mustache? Pizza mustache. Well, I mean, it looks a little bit different, Adam. Oh, usually, you know, I don't see you in mustaches. I mean, you do have a growth there. And, you know, it's growing every day. Sort of like Little Shop of Horrors. Oh, it's the growth. Okay, so that gives it the pizza shape. I understand now. All right. Well, thank you very much. And I'm going to also grow some pepperonis and some sausages out of this beautiful creation on my face called a mustache. I guess it's good to have a plan. Well, that's David Lunge talking about mustaches. I'm Adam Moe growing the world's best mustache, a pizza mustache. And Ms. Mars, thank you. And, of course, Uncle Chixer, take it away to a commercial break. Yes, I'm so ridiculous. It's miraculously funny. I mean, I'm just having a real good time. I just want to say when you're smiling, when you're smiling, the whole world smiles with you. Ha, ha, ha. And when you're laughing, when you're laughing, the sun comes shining too. So even if you don't have a mustache, at least you're having a good time. Ha, ha, ha. Thank you, Adam Moe. Ha, ha, ha. And that was Uncle Chixer. Boys and girls, I'm just munching on some cereal because that was pretty cool. So if you're munching on some cereal, you should be growing a mustache too. The question is how do we, you know, fine-tune a mustache? How do we trim a mustache, David? Well, it's obviously something you're not going to have to worry about for a long time. But for those of us who do have a rather bushy mustache, you can usually use like a small mustache trimmer like scissors. Or, you know, they have little mustache combs, which I actually enjoyed just kind of keeping in my pocket because they're fun. Even before I grew a mustache, I always had a mustache comb. And the off chance that someone would ask me if I had one, and no one ever asked, but that might just be in this day and age. David, something's happening to my face. This mustache won't stop growing. It's growing. It's growing huge. Well, yep, sorry. I don't know what to do about that, Adam Moe. Sorry you got this really long mustache all of a sudden that would be impossible to grow in the real world. But it's growing. I mean we can grow in the real world. But fortunately we're not in the real world. As evidenced by all of our presence here tonight. So. There it goes. It's a long drive. Way up and way back. It looks like. It looks like. Yes. Yes. It's a home run. Adam Moe is way out there. He's back out in the field. He's mustache is under it. He's caught it. We're doing believe this! It's growing huge. It's taking over. Can you hear me, boys and girls? I'm sure they can. Okay. It won't stop growing. My mustache is taking over my face because David Lund just told me to get an iguana and stick it on my face. Aah! Oh, oh, it's so, um, such a long mustache and just, gosh, whoa, look at it grow, and now it's out the door now and just going down the hallway, and it caught a fly ball, and it's just... Oh, man, it's just all over the place. We're gonna have to make a movie about this. All right, well, they'll just call me the mustache boy from now on. Forget Adamo. It's okay. I need to be disguised anyways because I am a famous cereal mascot, boys and girls, so once in a while, I have to be like Michael Jackson, too, and be in a wheelchair. Not sure I got that connection, but, um, yes. And, you know, I, uh, it was... Never mind. When I think of people growing out-of-control mustaches, I think of Michael Jackson in a wheelchair, so, yeah, makes perfect sense. Well, I get bored sometimes at the cereal factory where I live, and I watch a special on Michael Jackson, and when he used to be a pop star in the 1980s before he died, he, um, used to go out to Disneyland in a wheelchair and, um, pretend he was an older gentleman, and no one would ever recognize him, so I thought that's what I... Did he go on the rides? I don't know. He probably did it to, like, get to the rides faster. Okay, I'm sorry. I didn't want to bring up the Michael Jackson thing because I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm just playing. Okay, so, boys and girls, guess what? We have a very special treat joining us today here at the Adam Mo Podcast. Uh, he'll be here shortly. You know, he's an actor. He's probably on his cell phone, probably talking to his managers and his agents, but he's gonna be on our podcast, and it will be a great show. He'll be here shortly, and that is the terrific brilliance of Chris Dotson. Yes! That's gonna be exciting. I can't wait to hear Chris Dotson. I don't know about that guy. I'm not too excited about him, but, um, if that's the best he can do, then we'll have to work with it. I'm super excited to meet him. He's no Paul Provenza, I'll tell you right now, but, you know, um, as long as he has a pulse, we'll take what we can get. When push comes to shove, take it. Yep. Um, well... No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm super excited. This is a kid's show, Chickster. I'm sorry. Sorry about that. It's okay. No, no, no. Good tip either way. No, no, no. He's pretty cool. Um, supposedly, he's, um... Yep. Mustaches put people in a good mood. It's better than laughing gas. No, but you say laughing gas. What about what's going on with this pepper spray? I mean, you can put that on your mustache, and just sneeze it off. We're talking about current events here, folks. Hey, David Lunch. Yep. Do you think that Chris Dodson has a mustache? Um, I don't really care whether he has one or not. I'm gonna do the show regardless. I'm a professional, and it's not my idea or my job to speculate as to how much facial hair he does or doesn't have. Either way, I'm winning this mustache tournament, and I don't need the competition. I have the best mustache, period, hands down. Um, there you go. Raffle ticket is mine. Okay, fine. Well, anyways, um, I'm guessing he has a mustache, and he's probably gonna compete in the Pomona Raffle mustache contest at Pomona Thrift Store after all. He can compete and pay the $300 entry fee as well, but he's not gonna win. Oh, well, we'll just see about that, because actors are into mustaches nowadays, like, you know, Ashton Kutcher and all those celebrity... like, Justin Bieber. They all wear mustaches. Mm-hmm. So, anyways, moving right along... John Waters. John... there you go, John Waters. Who else? What famous baseball players wear mustaches? Well, you got, um, Raleigh Fingers, probably the most famous with his handlebar mustache. You had, um, Keith Hernandez, who's always known for having a pretty remarkable mustache. Hmm. Um, today, I'm trying to think. In today's day and age, who has a great mustache? Um, I don't know, that guy from the Cubs, Ryan Dempster? He kind of has a goatee. I don't know. Okay, most... What about the guy on the Yankees, Ron Jeremy? Ron Jeremy, yep. The, uh, the Yankees, um, third baseman. What about, um, okay, David. David's pretty impressive right now with his mustache knowledge, trying on the celebrity mustaches. Okay, let's see. Football. Um, I don't know. Lyle Alzado? Kind of dating myself here. Hockey. Hockey mustache. Jeez Louise. You know, a lot of the, uh, NHL enforcers these days are growing mustaches, but, you know, they're growing them, you know, for ironic reasons, not for the purity of the facial hair. Um, you know, I don't have a problem with that. You know, I mean, it's better to have a mustache than not have one, but sometimes you got to wonder why you're doing it. And, um, who has a good, you know, Bernie Ferdurco? Used to play for the St. Louis Blues. I always think of that guy as having a great mustache. And, um, other people I can't think of, but I'd love to see Wayne Gretzky grow one or, um, or Sidney Crosby. Boys and girls, look who it is! It's the world famous actor, Chris Dodson is here! Woo! Hey! Hey, Chris! Hey, Chris! So glad you could join us here at the Adam O Podcast. How are you today, Chris Dodson? I'm doing good, Adam O. Um, thanks, thanks for having me. This is very cool and it's nice to be around all these, uh, incredible mustaches. Yours, yours especially. That's really, uh, something you got going there. Yeah. It's pretty cool, right? It has pepperonis on it? Uh, yep. Yeah, it's got delicious looking pepperonis. I mean, I might just have to suck them off your face. They look so good, um, but we'll see how the, see where the show goes and, and then decide. Um, cool. So you guys do this every week or... like a regular show? Um... Yeah, we, I mean, we, we come here, you know, we eat pizza and look at each other and stare at each other and sometimes, you know, it's a loss of words, but we pull them from the sky and somehow, something comes together and it's, it's just beautiful. See what I have to work with, Chris Dotson? You see this? Yep, this is what I do, this is my life. I come here every week. He's right about the pizza and we, um, we basically stare at each other and now we're staring at you. How does it feel? Uh, it feels pretty good. It's nice to, to have your attention, really. I'm not used to getting this much attention, so, um, I'm near the door so I can leave, um, quickly. Chris, Chris, don't... That's not gonna happen. Don't, don't leave us. I'm just saying that, you know, just in case, um, fire or whatever, I don't know. No, no, we're a huge fan of your work. I'm, I'm glad you know of my work. That's, uh, it's nice to hear, thank you. No, no, seriously, boys and girls, he's a phenomenal actor. Yep, continue with the lies, thank you. I get paid in compliments. Actually, all year I've been paid in compliments. I haven't seen money since 2009, but, uh, as long as the compliments keep coming, I will get out of bed every day. That's enough. Now, now, Chris, you, you, uh, you opened that play, uh, up in, uh, Silver Lake, uh, Hamlet, uh... Chickster, you're out of your mind. That's not true. Don't insult... Oh, he's, he's, he's obviously done his research. I, I did open that play. Well, can you, can you continue with the question, Chickster? Sorry about that, Chris. Well, uh, to be or not to be, that is the question, Chris. Yeah, that's a good question. Whether it's his nobler in the mind to suffer the, the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune or to take arms against a, a sea of trouble... No, Chris. ...and closing in them. I feel like I'm on Good Morning America. There's, you know, the exact same questions they ask their guests. This is cool. Um, I have a question for you, Chris. Great rendition of Hamlet. Yeah. Uh, you said you haven't made, uh, you know, too much money, uh, since 2009. Are you for reals or are you just pulling our legs? Oh, no, you know, I, I get work here and there. It's just, um... I mean, because you have a pretty big list of, uh, credits under IMDB, um, Chris Dodson, and it's pretty impressive, and... Most of them are false. Yeah. ...I'm not sure if IMDB lies, but... that's a humble actor, boys and girls. So, what, so let's talk about this TV series that you played Max in. It's called Do Whatever. It was shot in 2011. Tell us about that. Yeah, Do Whatever. That was, uh, a web series I did, and it was shot by, uh, some very talented USC grad students who, it was like their thesis project. I, I still can't get the story straight, but basically, for their thesis project, they could either make a movie or else they entered in some kind of competition where they pitched their idea to Subway, and then Subway gave them money to make this web series. Yeah, that's right. And it's on IFC, featured on their front page of their website, right? Yeah, it's, it's been on IFC, on, on TV, and on their website, and, uh, it, it's funny, because they did a screening of it, and, uh, the show was sponsored by, uh, My Damn Channel. Mm-hmm. And, uh, after the screening, they had some, uh, people there, like the Sklar brothers were there, and Ileana Douglas, and, uh, some people know who Ileana Douglas is, some don't, but I, I think if you saw her face, you'd be like, oh, yeah, her, because she's, she's just been in a ton of stuff over the years. David Wunsch, do you know who Miss Douglas is? I sure do. I loved her in Goodfellas. She was only in it for a minute, but I think it was some of her finest work. She was sitting at a bar, and, and Joe Pesci was dating her and said, you know, he said, I'm gonna go to the men's room and, and don't look at anyone or I'm gonna kill ya. And that's right. Yeah, she was, that was her. And, uh, anyway, after the, the screening, she comes up to me and she says, you know, her first question is, how much did they pay you? It's like, you know, from one actor to another, I guess. She's like, tell me what did they pay you, and don't tell me it was a hundred bucks. And I was like, no, no, they, they paid me more than a hundred bucks. Now, now you're a big fan of the, the Breakfast Show with Adam Moe and, uh... I love it. I love it. And can you, if you had any, um, you know, um, things to help improve the show, every show, boys and girls, needs improvement, even, um, you know, your teachers at school, they need improvement. We all do. It's just part of life. Uh, we always improve. But at this point, I feel the show's good, but I want to ask a professional actor, any tips, you could give me acting tips as Adam Moe? Uh, no, no, that's, um, that's, that's, no, no, no tips whatsoever. But that's kind of like actors, right? We have to support each other. Well, when you played Cory's friend number two in Parenthood in 2011, um... Yes. Was Cory a nice guy? That was my dream role. Yes, uh, Cory was a heck of a guy. He, I don't know if you watch, do you watch Parenthood? I do, actually, and it's a hit show. But I want to hear exactly, like, you know, about Cory and, uh, how it was to be on that set of that hit show called Parenthood. Well, I, I only met Cory, we were only on set for a few minutes, it was a pretty brief scene, so I didn't get a really good feel for him, but it was something like he was taking over a shoe store, he was like the manager, this new manager of a shoe store, and I was just one of his friends, who's like a slacker, and they just had me hold a bong, and, because, like, you know, I'm a... Typical. ...a pot smoker, yep. And, um... No, you're not. Well, my character, Cory's friend number two, huge, huge pot smoker. And, um, can we talk about this on the air? I don't know. But they asked me for the bong, did they want me to pack it? Well, it is a kid's show. Yeah, of course. We should, we should definitely talk about it. Of course. And, uh, for the, for the bong, they're like, we can either put real tobacco in here, or we can put hookah tobacco in here. And so I was like, well, I'll go for the hookah tobacco, because, you know, I've never had that before. And they gave me the watermelon flavor, which is very delicious, but after doing, like, you know, 10, 11, 12 takes, you kind of tend to get a stomachache, and you feel like you're gonna die. You feel a little weird. So nothing bad happened, but I just went home and went to bed, like, at 5 p.m. Now, I also hear that you do, on the side of these professional shoots, you also are a hit, like, YouTube star in the rising, um, with thousands, yeah, thousands of hits. Um, so I guess you could just type in, what, Chris Dotson, right? And then they will link you to all the projects you do on YouTube or Google? Yes, you could, you could type my name in, and, and God knows what you will find. Some of it you'll want to find. Other stuff you're gonna wish you had, but, uh, I don't know. I don't think I had it. Love your website. Love your website, Chris. Thank you. My name is ChrisDotson.com, boys and girls. My friend Ozzy Ben did that. He's, he's British, but we didn't let that, uh, stop us from being friends, and he made my website. He's a very talented dude. So let me ask you a couple questions to get right down to the nitty-gritty part of showbiz. Yep, let's get down to the nitty-gritty. Oh, boys and girls, by the way, this is gonna be interesting, because I'm curious. Hey, Chris, have you ever met, uh, David Lunch before? Uh, no, this is my first time. He's, uh, seems like a great guy. I mean, I think you guys might just hit it off in the film. Uh, Mr. Lunch, what do you think? Well, I gotta see him on, on film. You know, you see a guy in, in person, and, and sometimes you put him on tape, and they look a lot different. Probably needs to come to my office, probably, uh, for one to two hours. We're gonna have a very thorough interview. We're gonna talk about, um, how he envisions the film, which has yet to be written. And, um, we'll go from there. Chris, what do you have to say? Sounds great. I'm not really doing much right now, so, uh, uh, two-hour meeting with David Lunch to talk about a, a nonexistent script sounds, sounds fantastic. Now, speaking about not doing much, that's not necessarily true, but I wanna know more about your bank account. Um, how much money did you make in 2011? What? How much money did I make? Yeah. You heard it. You heard me. I, I, I, not a lot. Not, not as much as I've made in, in other years. How much did you make in 2011? Oh, well, you know, the cereal, uh, is enough. Um... Well, I mean, if you're just talking, I mean, I have other, I do taxes as well, because when I'm not going to auditions, I like to unwind and, and do a lot of tax returns. It really relaxes me. So when I'm not doing that, that's kind of what pays the bills. But the acting income, let's see, I've, I've done, I did this job for, uh, uh, I did this job for, uh, a European clothing line. It was a commercial, and Reese Witherspoon was in it, and they cast me in it, and everything was going fine. I went to my wardrobe fitting the day before, got fit, I was, like, gonna be the hair stylist or something. And then I get to set, and I go through hair and makeup, and, and everything's totally cool, and, and then, like, I'm sitting around, sitting around, sitting around, and then finally the assistant director comes out, or it was probably the second AD, and says, we're not gonna need you, actually, so you can just, you know, just call it a day. And, um, so, you know, basically I got fired for some reason unbeknownst to me. But, so the good news is you get paid, you know, 500 bucks or something for basically doing nothing, but then, um, but, uh, you know, that's, that's showbiz. So I did that job, and then I did, um, some web videos for Red Bull. Nice. I like Red Bull. Made about, just from those two jobs alone, roughly $3,000. Uh, and then there's probably some residual income from TV shows. So if you factor that in, I've made about $3,000. Now, I understand, like, while I'm talking to you, you're sketching yourself. I'm just doodling. Oh, I thought that was, like, a method technique for actors. I'm trying not to look at, at David Lunch, and I'm just trying to stay calm and, um... Hey, David Lunch. This mustache is very intimidating. It's not unusual for someone to have a response like that. When they're in the presence of greatness, but my offer to come to my office and hang out for one to two hours still stands. We'll put it on video and see where it takes us. Um, that sounds great. That's pretty cool. Especially, like, the video, putting it on video aspect. Yeah. Now, have you ever played a part, um, in any movies or TV shows, uh, wearing a mustache, Mr. Dotson? I can't recall. I mean, I did a couple, I, I have a golf character, a golf pro, actually. It's a, uh... Love it. It's a golf instructor character I play. His name is Bruce Brian Billings, and it's basically if a golf instructor, well, let's put it this way. If Jeffrey Dahmer was a golf instructor, he would be... It's a kid's show, Mr. Dotson. Bruce, Bruce Brian Billings. Right. And that's a, you know, okay. I don't know how to, um... Just a guy. He's just a weird, random, he's just a weird guy. Just a weird guy. Well, it's not for the, the kids don't care. It's their parents. Right. We're explicit on iTunes under the kids category. That's, uh, that's a great move on your part. Thank you. Yep, we are edgy. We are edgy. We are edgy. David Lunch, what kind of car do you drive? A Maserati. I got, I got a Maserati because, you know, when you have a mustache, you got a reputation to maintain. People expect you to, to drive greatness. So that's what I do. I drive a Maserati, and it's black, and it's, if you want a ride, we can go for one later. And I bet you, Mr. Dotson, I bet you'd probably, let me guess, you probably drive probably a, a Carrera, a Porsche. Close. I have a 2009 Honda Civic. Basically the same thing. Yeah. Uncle Tixer, what kind of car do you drive? I, I drive a, a, a, a, a Chris Dotson. I mean, a Nissan Dotson. No, no, no, they changed the name to something else. Uncle Tixer, do you have any questions for Mr. Dotson? Yes, I understand he's doing a news show about circus life. Is that, is that true, Mr. Dotson? Yeah, wow, you've really done your research. I, I am indeed doing a, a news show for, for circus. What was it? Well, I mean, I mean, at least, at least you won't make peanuts like you've mentioned before. Oh, right, yes. No, no more making the peanuts. You'll be on the high and fly, flying trapeze with Adebo. I will be, I'll be flying high and just doing. Grab, grab the bearded lady and. Yeah. You know, just enjoy, enjoy life. Thank you. No, yeah, no more. I like the circus. I can't think of any off the top of my head. No more freak shows. I don't know. And Miss Mars, any, any specific targets you want to pinpoint in Mr. Dotson's career? You're going to have to pay her extra, Adebo. This is my assistant. David, you're next. I ask the questions. He's right. I'm strictly for David. I can't answer anything about Chris. Sounds like a healthy relationship. Yep, it is. It's the only way to fly. And someday you'll have an assistant, Chris Dotson, and you'll understand that words are very whatever the. Anyway, I have a question for you. So what is this? You're doing a film festival, some kind of deal. And it looks very profane. And this is a kid's show. And I'm not sure what this film. Do you want to talk a little bit about it? Yeah, I think you're alluding to the. And yeah, you're right. It's hard to say the title on air. But you know, I think it's a good idea. I don't know the title on air, but the word, you know, crap, you know, it's it's it's it begins with the word with the letter S. And it's that word, you know, the profanity. And it's called the S movie film festival, except that the S, of course, is spelled out. And that's going to be happening Friday, December 16th. I'm going to be one of the hosts of this film festival. And basically what it is, is people get together and they play all these bad movies and be movies, drive in movies. That kind of vibe. It's being held at the silent movie theater. And if you've been there before, but the film festival is in 2D and 2D glasses will be provided at the door. And just to give you an idea of the kind of stuff that will be there. There's that show called Moral Oral or it used to be on Cartoon Network, I think. And they have a never before seen episode of that that they're playing. And then I don't know if you've heard of the film The Room. That's kind of this cult classic. This cult classic thing that plays at midnight still. I think it still plays at midnight at the Sunset 5 on occasion. And they're going to be playing some outtakes of Tommy Wiseau, this web video that he's made or this web series. And then there's going to be a trailer for Predator 4. Very cool. Well, I can't wait to be there on December 16th at the whole... The silent movie theater. The silent movie theater for the festival. I'm not going to... Yeah. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. I mean I can't wait to be on that. way. I'm gonna be there. I like things that suck. That's why I hang out with Adam O. Just wanted to get that in. Uncle Chickster, yep, go ahead. Yes, hello everybody. I just want to say I'd like to talk to you about healthy alternatives since Thanksgiving's around the corner. In the beginning, God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds. Uh, so men and women would live healthy lives and then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Kremes and Satan said, you want chocolate with that? And man said, yes! And woman said, yes! And another one with jimmies and sprinkles and they gained ten pounds. And God created the healthy yogurt that women might keep their figure and that men found so fair and uh,! Children wanted to lose extra pounds and so Satan created McDonald's and it's 99 cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said, do you want fries with that? And man replied, yeah, super size them! And Satan said, it's good. And man went into cardiac arrest and God sighed and created quad drupal bypass surgery. Well, Satan in any way created HMO. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, yes! This is Uncle Chickster. And remember you are what you eat. Eat sensible. Eat turkey. But don't be a turkey. And that was Uncle Chickster boys and girls talking about turkey. It is Thanksgiving. I am growing the world's largest mustache in the shape of a pizza. Mushrooms just added to my mustache. David, lunch, how you doing? I'm doing well. I really appreciate that announcement that you made and the Because that's what you eat for Thanksgiving. You have a late lunch or an early dinner but you definitely do not eat breakfast. Once again, lunch rules. Breakfast sucks. Isn't that right? Adam O! Boys and girls, don't listen to David. See, I do a children's show called The Breakfast Show with Adam O. And I'm all about breakfast if you're wondering what we're talking about. And see, this guy next to me he thinks it's funny to always rub it in my face that breakfast sucks. And, of course, his last name happens to be Lunch, and he's all about lunch. And that's The Breakfast Show. It's the best children's show in Los Angeles. And, of course, I always take David Lunch at the end of the show and prove him that I'm right. He's wrong with a nice little old-fashioned lesson. Yeah, whatever. Let's put it to Chris Dotson. Chris Dotson, which is better, lunch or breakfast? Was that the end of your question? Yep. Okay. Well, I have to eat. I'm hypoglycemic, so I have to eat breakfast. I have to have a big meal at the beginning of the day. Otherwise, it just throws me off. So for me, breakfast is probably literally the most important meal of the day. I love lunch. There's no getting around that. That is also a great meal. So I see that you guys, this is a very sore subject for both of you, and I really don't feel like getting in the middle of it. That's okay. But they're both great meals. And you both. They bring up wonderful points. So you're about breakfast. Thank you. Moving right along. Mr. Dotson, this has been one of the most outrageous. Thanks for avoiding our question, Chris Dotson. You're a real. Go ahead. Yeah. He's a real good sport to like breakfast better than lunch. Good thing we're edited. That's a great thing. Censored, whatever. Well, Mr. Dotson, sorry about that, Mr. Dotson. Lunch gets out of hand sometimes if he doesn't eat. That's cool. I'm the same way. I'm a whole hypoglycemic thing. That's right. You guys have a lot in common. I'm going to take you, Mr. Lunch, in that mustache competition. But anyways, back to our special guest, Chris Dotson. You know, like I was saying, this is one of the most outrageous podcasts we have ever done here. It's it makes absolutely no sense to me as to what we're talking about. If you're following along. But you know what? The spirit's there. Kind of like Thanksgiving. Everybody comes to the table. And you don't know what they have to say. They just come from all over the country onto this one table in your family living room. And you see your uncle for the first time. And then he has something to say that's completely random from what's happening in your life. So it all makes sense. It's like a story. It's like a table. It's like a turkey. And everybody has something to say. But at the end of the day, it's real fun. And we're thankful to have you here, Chris. But I want to ask you, what do you what do you what are your words on this podcast? The Adam Lopat? The Adam Lopat Podcast. What are my words? Yeah. I mean, what do you what do you think about it? I mean, if you had to, you know. Yeah. No, this is a great thing. I'm glad that you guys do this. This is really cool. I, I really don't know what I'm glad it exists. And I think it's, you know, it's awesome. Does that help? I don't know. I mean, what is the show to you? I mean, how would it make when you you're a big listener to this show? And yeah. Yeah. I mean, I tune in every every day, every week, month. How often do I tune? I tune in a lot. And since we got a little sidetracked, what is the show about? Are you asking me my interpretation? Are you really not sure what the show is about yourself? No, no, no, no. I'm asking you. Okay. It's just about just you like breakfast and then and then David Lunch likes lunch. And then and then you you have the other guy here who does the commercials. And then there's an assistant and I that's a radio show. Would you like to play our next serial chef? You know, I was, you know, I've been on my cell phone talking to my managers and agents. And we're gonna have to get back to you on that. But thank you for that. Thank you for the consideration. That's awesome. I yeah, we're at Little Birds next week. It's a 30 seater. The East Side. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Let's let's maybe I can come and watch the show and then and take it from there. Great. That'd be fantastic. Cool. And Miss Mars with the weekly forecast on the astrological forecast. So I was looking for Hello, everybody, including moms, dads, boys, girls, grandmas, grandpas, pilgrims, Indians, iguanas and mustache models. This is your friendly course. I'm your correspondent, Una Mars, on behalf of the breakfast show here at Skid Row Radio in Los Angeles, California. I am your astrological forecaster and the stars will prevail the kind of day and evening that you are having. For all of you who have a birthday today, Tuesday, November 21st. Well, 22nd. 22nd. Yep. Excuse me. Sagittarius has just begun. Goodbye, Scorpio. However, the moon is still in Scorpio. For those of you on the 22nd, this year will be very challenging in your relationship department. You may go through many ups and downs. However, consider the possibility that both you and your partner may have a relationship. I'm sure you have a relationship with your partner. I'm sure you have a relationship with your partner. partner, or friend could be right. This type of situation will arise with many different people. See if there's a common theme connecting them. If you are single, you could attract many different types of people. You might want to date until you are sure of yourself. If you are attached already, let your sweetie have at least equal say if you want to keep the peace. Now remember, this is a very, very good time for you. The crescent moon is out, and it could bring lots of good fortune for you. I want to say thank you for having me on your show, Adamo. And I will wish you the very best, and hopefully I'll see you again soon. And everyone, have a very happy... Happy Thanksgiving. And thank you very much to Miss Mars, David Wunsch's assistant for the day. Yeah, and Adamo, you didn't tell me that you're going to have her do that. That's not in our contract, so, you know, we can take care of it here. It's just another $40 for her, and then another $20 for me. That should cover it. So, and also to sum up what Unamar said, so basically if you're born on November 22nd, get ready for next year to suck. Chris? When's your birthday? My birthday is December 6th. That's actually like two weeks away. And what do you want for your birthday this year? I have put absolutely no thought into that at all. Maybe someone to make my monthly car payment. That'd be great. Nice. Fixter, when's your birthday? My birthday, I'm a Leo. It's August 9th. And, you know, I'm one of the lions. You know, I'm a lion boy. Fire sign. I'm a fire sign, too. Oh, well. Yep. There we go. Well, boys and girls, this has been the Adamo podcast with our special guest, Mr. Chris Dotson. Oh, thank you. And you can find Chris at www.mynameiscrisdotson.com. You can put in three W's, too, at the beginning. It doesn't matter. www.mynameischrisdotson.com. My name is ChrisDotson.com. Yep. Google him. And thank you very much, Chris, for being on the show. Yeah, this is a lot of fun. Thanks, Adamo. It was great meeting all of you. And, yeah, keep it going. I mean, yeah, awesome. And, of course, Miss Una Mars, thank you for joining us today. Thank you, Adamo. And Mr. David Wanch. I'll see you at the mustache competition. So just so we're clear, it's another $60 tonight, $40 to her, $20 to me. Another $2 penalty with every day that goes by that you don't pay it, capping off at $114 max. All right. And moving right along to our very own thank you to Uncle Schickster's final thought. Yes, thank you very much. I want to wish everybody a very happy and prosperous Thanksgiving. And just remember, even if you eat flies, be proud that you have food on the table. Don't swat away your life. Yes! Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. And before we go, what are we all thankful for? I am thankful to have everybody here at the table tonight and to be smiling and laughter with joy for all. And happy Thanksgiving to everybody. And, Chris, what are you thankful for? I'm just thankful to be living in L.A. and being able to pursue, you know, what I wanted. And just I'm grateful to be surrounded by great people and to have a great family and things like that. And Mr. Lunch? I'm thankful that I'm going to kick everyone's butt at the mustache tournament in Pomona, California. So a word to all of you. You're thinking about entering. Don't bother because you're going to be on your knees. You're going to be cowering at the sight of my mustache as it wreaks havoc on you. And you're going to have low self-esteem. And you're going to be like, man. I should have stayed home and listened to David Lunch, but I didn't. And now it's too late. So there you go. Bang. Bang. And Uncle Chickser, what are you thankful for? I'm thankful for deodorant. And Miss Una Mars, what are you thankful for? To be surrounded by good friends and great family, good health and prosperity for all. Well, that's it for the Adamo podcast. And we're thankful for our beautiful fans, supporters, and to be here at Skid Row Studios. We'll see you next week. Actually, yeah, we'll be back next week after the holiday break for a brand new episode with special guest Doug Loosenhop, DJ Doug Pound from Tim and Eric. He'll be our special guest. And then a couple weeks down the road, we'll be followed by Tom Green as our guest. And this has been a very special Thanksgiving. podcast episode with fun for all. Like I said, it was like a Thanksgiving meal in here. Take it away, Mr. David Lunch, with your final words. Got a lot of final words tonight. Well, just very thankful for my Maserati. I'm glad that that kind of a car exists because I like to drive very fast. And when I drive fast, I like to drive in as expensive a car as possible. And that's why I have a Maserati. So happy Thanksgiving. To all of you. And I hope that if you don't already own expensive cars that someday very soon that you will. And also, you know, just be thankful for food and shelter and the other stuff, too. And I'm not very good at opening up emotionally. But, you know, just I'll be thinking about you. And when I'm at the mustache tournament, you'll I'm doing this for all of you. That was terrific. Well, we'll see you all next week. Have a happy. And safe. And warm. Thanksgiving to all. I'm Adam O. Can we leave now? And good night.