Derek Pierce, Camira White, and Josie discuss porn and comedy

Thank you. Thank you. The bad boy of Triple X. You got to be really bad to be the bad boy of Triple X. Derek Pierce. What's up? Derek, as you can see, I paired you. I had you meet four of the most beautiful breasts that I know right here. Two of them belong to our guest here. One of my favorite comedians. And I do comedy all over the town. Most comedy bores me. Hers does not. She's fucking hilarious. Camira White. Thank you. You want to get that mic a little closer, Camira? Yeah. I can like it. You didn't hear the notes? I know. Yeah. Yes, suck it. Yes, yes. I knew my boy would fuck me. I knew he did. I knew. Oh, that I want to fuck you? Yeah. Oh, please. If I wanted to fuck you, I would have fucked you. Don't worry about it. I'm sure he did a ton of research. I did a ton of research. I actually went to a comedian show in Gardena last night. Oh, so you're stalking her now. Yeah, I'm stalking her. That's what I'm doing. Doing research. I did some research. And so I did want to let you know, this is going to be great. I can tell already there's some chemistry in the room. Yeah. But before we get started, I got to tell you about our sponsors. We are sponsored by Audible.com. Audible.com. I love audio books. I love driving on the road, listening to audio books. And one of our other XXX guests, Sasha Gray, has a book on Amazon.com. The Juliet, was it the Juliet Society? Where she reads it herself? I don't remember what she said. Something like that. She lost me. She started going. So anyway, but that's eight hours of Sasha Gray talking. Talking. Talking. Talking dirty to you. You can have that free if you go to darkmarkshow.com. Click on the Audible button or any book you want. Does she talk dirty? I think she reads stories. Are they? It's a whole. She's trying to do like, I think she's trying to do, and correct me if I'm wrong, like a 50 states of grace. She's trying to do her own like kind of thing. So it's a whole piece. Oh, yeah. Yes. I know everyone's doing that now. That's what I want for my book stars. Right. So yes. Just to be reading shit. Exactly. Exactly. So that's. So that. But if you don't like that, they've got. They've got Stephen King books. They've got Dracula. They've got. She's terrific. They've got Stephen King books. They've got comedy albums by Louis C.K., George Carlin. They've got. They've got everything. Just go to. Just go to darkmarkshow.com. Click on the Audible button. You get a free book. Give you something for free. Get a free 30 day trial. You can't lose. If you don't like it the next day, cancel the membership. But we're also sponsored by damatees.com. Damatees is the greatest. The greatest T-shirts that I'm aware of. Everybody likes the Misfits. Is your T-shirt from there? No, it's not. No. But. Why not? Not wearing the sponsors he's promoting. I'm not wearing the sponsors. No, I actually. My reanimator T-shirt is in the wash. But they have reanimated T-shirts. They've got. Also, they've got porn star T-shirts. They've got Buck Angel T-shirts. They've got. Yeah, that's the one I want to wear. Tracy Lord's T-shirts. They've got a shirt that's Misfits. It's Boba Fett with a devil lock. Wait, they have a Tracy Lord's one? Absolutely. They have a Tracy Lord's one. Yes. The bitch that put like six people in jail. Everyone says that when they come on here. Everybody hates Tracy Lord's. Yeah. Do you share her T-shirt? The dude who fucked her went to jail. Right. What's the guy's name? The fucker. Forgot the dude's name, but he went to jail for like a year because he fucked her when she had a fake ID. Yeah. Wow. You were like in junior high then. How do you know these things? I'm 40. Oh, you are 40. Okay. So you were jerking off to that video that he. I was jerking off to Nina Hartley and. Right. God, Ebony A's, Nina Hartley. Right. Whoa. Tindra. Black porn must be totally different. I don't know none of these people. Ebony A's is a black porn star. I don't know her. I know Stacey Lane. She's bigger than yours. I know Pinky. Should we do a Hollywood report before we get into it, Josie? Four foot nine. Yeah, I'll make it brief. I just want to thank everyone who came to the show on Saturday. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Here's a song. Oh. It's the Hollywood report, folks. Push me down, down on the floor. Give it to me, baby. I need some more. Sex, junkie, sex, junkie, sex, junkie whore. Sex, junkie, sex, junkie whore. Sex, junkie, sex, junkie whore. It's deep. Yes. That is Josie Cat with her band, old band, Piss Amp. So what's the Hollywood report, Josie? That was 20 years ago. That was 20 years ago and you were 12. Go ahead. What is the Hollywood report? Somebody else is 40 in the room. Go ahead. Tomorrow, go to the Dragonfly for Drew from Lip Service's memorial. Yeah, I don't think we explained it last week. It's free. Lip Service is a goth clothing brand. It's been around for a long time. And the founder was decidedly. And they're doing this great benefit for him. There's going to be slideshows and art and bands. Sad goth people. Even sadder than usual. I did hear about that. Yeah. No, I'm kidding. But yeah. Not the sad goth part. I mean the guy from Lip Service. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So. And just a big thank you to everyone who came to the show on Saturday. Yeah, she had a show on Saturday. It was terrific. So I was a little reticent to have Derek Pierce on the show tonight. Derek Pierce is the bad boy. He's got such great credits as that ass in yoga pants. She's a handful three. Anal fanatic six. Anal agenda. Fat ass. P-H-A-T. Fat ass white girls five. Housewives orgy. A lot of big booty stuff. No, no. Wet tits. I don't pick them. I just fuck them. Wet tits. Don't tell my husband too. Cock monster. Cock monster. Cock monster. Cock monster. And if you're in cock monsters, forget about it. I was the throwaway scene in cock monsters. Oh, really? You were in the cock monster? No. Did you end up on the cutting room floor? Probably. They were like, what the fuck is he doing in this goddamn movie? So I was a little reticent to have you on the show because. Was it not monster enough? I mean. No. We're going to get into how big his cock is. Don't worry about it. We might have to have a contest between me and MC who was bigger. Wait. Oh, I'm sorry. There's a mic on. I'm sorry. I don't know. I might have to compare myself. I did not watch your movies. But I was a little reticent to have you on the show because you were on Daily's Dark Side. And that was a great interview. And if you go on the Skid Row Studios, the archives, that's a great interview. And so I sent Josie, there's a male porn star that wants to come on the show. She said, yes. And then I sent you the information, his information and his picture. And you said, I can't tell if he's gay or not. So I think. You know, I've heard that a lot, though. It's nothing personal. You know, it's just. Honestly, you do have sort of a. Because it's just. It's the times now. It's not personal. But are you gay? Three-fourths people are gay. So it's like. Three-fourths of people are gay? That's how I feel like, yeah. So three-fourths of you is gay? Three-fourths. You know what I mean. Yeah, make sure you get in the mic. I'm just shaking. I want to know which third is straight. Make sure you get in the mic because we don't want to miss all these scientific statistics that three-fourths of people are gay. Three-fourths of people. So basically. He saved the fuck out of you. You know that, right? It's nothing personal, but do you suck a dick? There's still three out of us on this table. Yeah, I have a feeling who that might be the other side of the table. Three-fourths. But nothing personal, but you don't suck dick? No. No, okay. So he's straight. But you do have. Honestly, and I'm sure you've. Just waiting to hear the end of this. No, I'm sure you've been to West Hollywood. There are a lot of guys that have that bald head. Well, first off, a straight guy that works out, that's odd in itself. Is it? Is it? Gay guys, gay guys. In his world, it is. Well, in my world, anybody working out is weird. But gay guys do have, they have a lot. There's a lot. It's like a right tip. Aren't you wearing guyliner? I am wearing guyliner. I'm just checking. Yeah, you are. No, that's fine. Trust me. I'm so masculine. I have to soften my. And gay men love him because he's a bear. I'm a bear, yes. I am a bear. I get it. But I've been to West Hollywood. I've seen guys like you. But it's the bald head. It's like the I am too sexy sort of look thing. Yeah. Yeah. You've seen a couple gay guys that look sort of like you, right? I've seen gay guys that look like both of us. I guess so. Okay. Well, here's the thing. Now, let me get off the gay thing. I've seen gay guys that look like me. I've seen a few gay guys that look like me. But here's the thing. You and Josie have a lot in common. We have tattoos and we're white. You're white. You have tattoos. But her tits are bigger than mine. Her tits are bigger than yours, but they're not bigger than Camara's, I've noticed. No one's tits are bigger than mine. Right. And yeah, so you might have to get in some more surgery, Josie, to keep it in. I'm going to have to keep up with the other guests on the show. But you both are fitness trainers. I know you didn't know that about Josie. She's getting her class two yoga license. You both own pit bulls. Oh, yeah, pity. Yeah. That's awesome. See, see. That's tough. Yeah, see. So you do, and apparently you both are over 40. So you have a lot in common. Who told you that? I said apparently. I don't know yet. Well, he said he's 40. Yeah, I'm 40. So, but you were, I was going through your biography. Josie actually did most of the research tonight. But you were raised by a single mother, as most people are these days. Yeah. And you lost your virginity at 13. Yeah. Now tell us that story. How did that happen? Because at 13, I was still learning how to masturbate correctly. And I didn't, I didn't master that till 16. So how did, how did this happen? I used to sneak over to like my girlfriend's house. How old was your girlfriend? One or two years older than me. Okay. And we had popped the nails out of the screen to her room. And basically we had sex with half of her. And I left my body hanging out the window. So I was hanging on to the, to the windowsill. Why? I, because she said, you can't come all the way in. I don't know. Oh wait, so when you were outside the window. All the way in between those legs. I wasn't talking about the pussy. She's like, no, like if, if, if like my dad comes in or whatever, like you gotta be able to get the fuck out quick. So if you were on the outside of the house, it was okay. Why did she just come outside? Like my ass was sitting on the, cause then she wouldn't be there if he like came to check on her. But if he busted in the doors, her ass would hang out the window. Yeah. So she was like, I'm not going to do that. She wasn't in the door as opposed to kind of like casually walking in. I could fall the fuck out the window. She didn't really care. Or if he, if he was watering the lawn, he'd catch you guys. Well, at two or three in the morning, I used to sneak out. Oh, okay. All right. All right. So you were 13. Yeah. And you obviously you're built for porno if your dick's fitting into the window. So I wasn't across the driveway fucking her through a window. I don't know. I climbed like. He was at the bottom of the staircase. Duh. Yeah. And you were, and you were such a bad boy. I read that your mother, when you were 16. Thought there'd be real problems. So it was real problems. So I guess you're, what kind of problem? All boys are at 16. The truth, I was arrested for assault with intent to rob when I was 13. Grand theft auto when I was 14. Wait, wait, wait. Assault at 13? Yeah. Assault with intent to rob. Who were you robbing? Somebody ass and try to take their shit and got caught. Like a fucking genius. Wow. Yeah. So I just hung around. Was this an adult that you kicked their ass or? Yeah. Well, there's like three of us. Oh, okay. All right. Fucking 14. I can take three for 13 year old kids, but that's just me. I was big when I was 14. I was only like 5'9 and like 170 pounds. Oh, okay. Cool. Yeah. Yeah. And so your mom was real, because you were, you were a bit of a thug then. Yeah. So I hung around the wrong element and then I got into sports and a lot of that stuff changed. Right. Football first or just. Sports is always good for boys. Yeah. It started with track and field. Okay. And then evolved into football and then that evolved into, actually I stopped playing football. Playing football to dance. Leave the West Hollywood comment alone. Three, four. No, go ahead. So you danced. Yeah. I taught hip hop for almost four years. Okay. So it wasn't like you were doing ballet. You were, you were break dancing. You were doing that type of shit. Yeah. More like hip hop. I come here to laugh at the hip hop, but that's a, that's a, if I knew I would have had you bust some moves. I mean, maybe there's a, cause you do so many porn parodies. You got panties for that shit. Maybe. I've done it in the porn parodies. I did it in Wicked's. They did one called Sexy and then they did another one. Yeah. It's like we should know this. Wait, wait. Breaking. Somebody did some research. Breaking three electric boogaloo. The porn parody. I get it. I can see it. I would have done it. You would have done it. I don't have a lot of shame. I'm writing this script right now. They just fast forward it to the sex. They don't. They can't because there's so many fucking parodies and so much talking going on. I can't imagine that everybody's just fast forward. Well, actually, I, we do have a picture of you as Bane on the Dark Knight parody. If you want to put that up. And it's funny cause I was telling somebody, I was showing him your, your picture that you were going to be on the show. I was showing a friend of mine. I guess it's on the screen here. It's not on the screen there. Yeah. But you guys have seen it. It's on the Facebook page. If you want to look at it later. There it is right there. There he is. That's him as Bane. It was funny cause I showed my friend, uh, or your picture and she's like, yeah, he's okay. I showed her the picture of that. She's like, that's hot. And if you didn't know anybody, you would think that was Tom Hardy. We know the funny thing is about those pictures is they were taken by a guy named Ben Hoffman. Right. Uh, and Ben has done all of the, uh, all the comic book parodies that we've done. Right. And, uh, then he made a coffee table book out of all of the characters. Oh, wow. And he went to comic con. Mm hmm. And everybody kept asking him, where the fuck you get all these outfits from? And he had told him, he's like, Oh, I have a friend who's a costumer and, you know, works for the studios. And he said, another photographer came up and said, you're fucking lying. I know who made those. That's from vivid. That's for Axel. Cause they asked me to do it or not a photographer, but he was a costumer and they had tried to give him the job. The coffee table book was, did not, did not say, did not say it was for porn. Nah. No. Okay. There's all hero shots. Oh, wow. Okay. They look amazing. That was not even like a good hero shot. he's not doing it well because if you want to get nerds attention, say it's for porn too. Comic books and porn. It says it, it says it on the listings of who the, who the, the model is. Right. Not on the cover. Right. Right. So if you didn't know who Derek Pierce was, you wouldn't know. A lot of people thought like in some of the hero shots that they're like, Bane didn't look that good. And I was like, the costumers, why? And he did look kind of shitty in the movie, to be honest with you. I, you know, he looked okay. I mean, I don't know. I didn't really pay that much attention. You don't like it? No, I thought he looked pretty good. Oh, okay. Not as good as Tom Hardy normally looks. He looked like shit in that movie. He was more bulky, not as cut. I didn't like it at all. Right. The original comic book Bane is a very big dude. Right. But the original, yeah. He's small, like a wrestler. Well, he's like five, seven. And Bane's supposed to be like a six foot five, huge. Yeah. No, I know, but they just, so I, and I guess, you know, that there's one, you don't have to look pussy because you got the mask on, right? I like looking pussy. Okay. Did you take the mask off to look pussy or just, it wasn't. That mask sucked. It was really heavy. Oh, we just took the mask and putting it in there or. I wish. They're trying to get through the holes, but. It's in the clubs we hang out. There's all sorts of things going on here. Do you feel in charge? Now, Camila White's here. She is a wonderful, beautiful comic. Camila. Yes. I've never seen you so quiet in my life. Now this woman, I'll tell you how I met this woman. I did a show in Leimert Park and there was a lot of really good comics on the show, black and white. And you just came out and it just exploded. And I was like, wow, who's this? Who, where you been hiding? And where have you been hiding? You've been hiding, hiding Gardena, right? Yeah. Well, you were born in the, in Hotlanta. Yeah, I was born in Atlanta. Yeah. Yeah. And, um, my dad, you know, my mom didn't like him and she moved back. We moved back to here and, um, I've been here ever since. In Gardena. Yeah, I grew up in Gardena. Um, I was bad. I was, I kind of, he's tripping me out right now because I've never met a white boy who's a thug and his dick is big. Like, this is like shit. I need his autograph. You're not me. Okay. No, go ahead. Well, I haven't seen your dick. You, you guys, everybody's talking about his dick. So I'm like, wow. I was going to ask you Camila, because we're not related because my last name is white too, but, uh, we might be. I'm sure we're all related way back when. We're all related way back. Don't say that because I still want to fuck you, but we're all related way back when. But is it weird being an African American woman with the last name white? Did you get like some shit for it? What's weird is that my parents named my name so Afrocentric. My name is Camila Matilaba White. That's pretty Afrocentric. So it's like, you know, like, why didn't you change the last name? Like, it should be like X. You feel me? Like, wow. They fucked you on that one. Yeah. They wanted you to have a little diversity. That is true. But really, you know, when you think about it, that's who I am. Like I'm hood. I smoke weed, but I valet park. You know what I mean? Like, you know, I eat asparagus. That's who I am. You know what I mean? Nothing wrong with that. Is asparagus a white thing? With your ribs. Yeah, it is. So you eat asparagus and ribs. Yeah. Yeah. Asparagus and ribs. Exactly. Yeah. Okay. Exactly. I didn't know asparagus was a white thing. I didn't know mayonnaise was a white thing until I saw it. Oh, definitely. It definitely is a white thing. I hate mayonnaise. I hate mayonnaise. I can't stand mayonnaise. Josie's the only white person in the room that likes mayonnaise. It's a whole thing. I guess a lot of white people eat mayonnaise. Cum is better than mayonnaise. Okay. What's that? Cum is better than mayonnaise. And we all know cum is not good. I'll take your word for it. Josie, can you verify this? Sounds good to me. Okay. So when did you start doing comedy? I have a feeling, because I was looking at some of your YouTube clips. Pretty recent, right? Yeah. I've only been doing comedy for three years. Wow. Yeah. I was a single mom. I'm still a single mom, but I don't give a fuck anymore. That's right. I'm done. Just drag them along. That's instant material. What are you talking about? Yeah, I don't give a fuck anymore. No, Hold on. I forgot. Daughter, son. She's 13. She's 13. Do you do Vine clips? Vine clips? Not really. Only because I'm toe up half of the time. I'm not one of those girls. What's a Vine clip, Josie? I'm not sure. On Vine? A lot of comedians are doing clips on Vine. Well, now you tell me. There's a whole outlet. I could have been a superstar by now. What she's trying to say is, you're not really much of a comedian, because you're not on Vine. I'm not on Vine. Now I got to look at the Vine. I thought you knew. I didn't know about Vine. Do you know? Not about comedians, but I know of Vine. Sorry, enough of my ignorance, but 13-year-old daughter, now there's got to be some comedy gold there. Yeah, not really. She's boring. Not really. It's just, yeah, it's like. Are you looking at her going, man, when I was 13, I got in so much more trouble than you? Oh my God, when I was 13, I couldn't even have came to this shit, because I would have had a party. You know, I did shit like that. Were you fucking when you were 13? Yeah, I was fucking when I was 13. What would you lose your virginity? You know what? I ruined a boy's life in the ninth grade. Let's hear this. Like, he had just started fucking, and I've been fucking, and I rode his dick. He quit football. The coaches was like, leave him alone. Leave him alone. Yeah, the instruction. You sabotaged the football team by fucking. Yeah, I sabotaged his damn life. They were, they were. I still got one. I'm sure she's ruined some guy's life fucking him. I'm sure. I fucked the shit out of all of them, but I really did though. No, it was bad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So you were 13, so the football team never won a game, and it was all your fault. no, no, no, no. All the cheerleaders were like. The other schools were paying us. You need to fuck that one right there. One, two, three, four, come here and stop fucking our quarterback. Yeah. I swear it was. I swear. Right. I don't, they kicked me out the school. Right. For fucking the quarterback? Yeah. He quit. And so they kicked you out of school for that? You know how, you know how. I got a feeling. You got expelled for your pussy? And guess what? I went to Catholic school too. That's the cool part. Oh, well those are. Yeah, we love the Catholic school. Sorry if you're offended. That's where all the whores are made. Yes. I mean, look, you got that skirt on. You can sit on somebody's lap on the bench. Yeah. No, there's whores in public school too. Oh, right. But if you go through porn and you look around and you see how many girls are. Yeah. The ones in Catholic school are hotter. And yeah. They all end up on the pole too. Oh yeah, I'm sure they do. And they're wearing the same outfit too. The same Catholic school outfit. Absolutely works. Right. So, so, so Camara was telling me about her ex-boyfriend and he might want to get into porn. He's not going to be calling in, but Derek got into porn because he was fucking a porn star. You were fucking somebody who was getting into porn. No, we actually started. Well, yes, I was, but she was doing just girl, girl. And I just started meeting people because she wasn't very good to people, which is a nice way of saying she's a fucking bitch. Ex-girlfriend, I'm assuming. Oh yeah. Oh boy. Absolutely. Yeah. I guess you guys don't get along, do you? I, I'm indifferent. I forgot she existed. Exactly. Except that everybody brings it up in interviews because that's how you get into porn. It's fine for me. So, so I basically helped her get in and get acclimated and things like that. Right. And after about a year, like people, she was like, you know, I want you to get behind the camera so you can start shooting your own stuff. And I'm like, okay, well, I don't know how the fuck you do that. Right. So I started talking to people and nobody wants to teach you how to do their job. Right. And I was like, oh, come over here. Let me show you how to run a camera and light shit so I can be out of work. Exactly. It doesn't really work that way. But people kept asking me if I was talent. And I was like, wow, I'm talented. But no, I was like, look at those eyes. Now, I think it's about time that we asked the question, how big your dick is. Oh, like seven and a half, eight normal. Okay. That's normal. That's normal. That's normal for porn. Okay. Like if I fuck girls off camera that are like, like, you know, uh, civilian chicks, like they're like, whoa, whoa, you have a big dick. And I look around like, who are you fucking talking to? If I had a dime for everyone that said that, go ahead. Uh, seven and a half. So it's about, eight inches. Seven and a half. It depends on how far back I want to fool myself to measure. Right, right, right. You're not, you're measuring for your asshole or you're from my ass? Is it, is it tall and skinny or is it big and fat? It's thick. It's, my dick is built like me. Oh shit. Okay. It's very thick and it's very, very muscular. But you, but you, but you've had white dicks. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, I have not had a white dick. I want a white dick. Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh. I have not had a white dick. No, because last night I was in Gardena. I did my whole set about how I look pussy for three hours. And yeah, you were getting a little, I've never had that happen. Pussy eating is probably my favorite thing. Yeah. I like pussy eating over getting my dick sucked. Really? I love you. Yeah, that's real. That's honest. We can get married. Yeah. Yeah. I, even I can't, I love eating pussy. I can't even say that. And we were talking about, um, about BDSM stuff. Right, right. I always feel really awkward when we shoot BDSM because the pussies, you're just like, I can't because I'm a dom. And, and they don't look at it the same way. Right. And, and Drex is like, fuck it. If you want to lick that bitch's pussy, lick it. And I'm like, eh, but somebody's going to talk some shit. Yeah, it doesn't make sense when you're, you're whipping a chick. And you're just like, let me eat your pussy. I like getting my pussy ate when I know it's some good dick afterwards. I don't like pussy monsters. I don't like niggas that don't have dick and they just want to chomp on you. I don't like that. Pussy monsters. I don't like that. You know what I mean? Pussy. Pussy. I'm good. Just, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. You better enjoy it now, because there's a little fucking thumb dick coming out of his eye. I need some dick after the coochie. So, so not every black man is hung. Not, no, hell no. All right. That's a achievement. That's a achievement no better than I would. Oh, no. That's the fucked up thing about being in porn. Like, if, if you're a brother and you're not swinging that thing, like, fuck out. But if you're a white dude, you're good. Yeah. Really? Marcus London. Because it's not expected. Marcus London? He's got a small dick? Yeah, he doesn't care. It's sad too, because a black man with a small dick is like. Do you know who Lexington Steel is? I might have heard him once or a thousand times. Yeah. I was on Playboy TV with him, with our, my band played. Right. And he whipped it out, and I was like, whoa, holy shit. Lex, Prince, Jon Jon, Charlie Mack. I shoot all those guys for some of the lines that I. I'm not saying no black men are hung. I'm saying not every black man is hung. No, it's just a misconception. Right. It is. And by the way, Derek was on Playboy Radio. Yeah, we had a show on there for like three years. Oh yeah, that's fun. So that's another thing you have in common, you have Playboy Media. Yeah. Surprising I read. So anyway, so let's get back. So they're like, so you end up in a porno movie. Yeah, so basically I lied myself onto my first, into my first scene. You know, I had a friend that owned a company, a pretty big company called DVSX, and the first movie I shot was called Goth Sent 4, and it was with a girl named Vanessa Lane. Nice. Who's like this little gymnast chick, and could do like everything. Right. And so my friend was like, oh, you've been shooting? I'm like, oh yeah, absolutely. Done this a bunch of times. And shot the scene, it went okay, and the director was Guy Capo, and he went on, they used to have this thing called Porn Star Performance. Right. Where like directors could kind of like rate their talent, like oh, they were on time, they were efficient, or they fucked up, don't ever hire them. And so he wrote like a nice review about me, and a couple other directors saw that, and then started hiring me. I mean, were you nervous having to give it up the first time? Because I was telling you, Nina. I had a hard on in the driveway. Okay. Because I was so excited, I was like, oh my God, it's going to be fucking awesome. He loves it. So you don't need Viagra, you don't need Cialis, you don't need this. Oh, I was bringing it with me. You never. Okay, so there have been times that you needed a boost. You don't know when you're going to have a flat tire, but it's nice to have a spare, right? There you have it. Absolutely, he's prepared. He is prepared. You go in, you talk to that girl, and she's mad at her dude who doesn't have a job, and is bitching her because she's a fucking whore, and he just dropped her off. You go in, you're like, hey girl, how you doing? And she's like, fuck off. I'll be right back. Right. Nothing kills a heart. Ladies, listen to this guy. Nothing kills a heart. I'm like, yeah, the nagging. Right, but you, right, Kameron? I just lost my train of thought. I'm cold. I don't play that. If your dick don't get hard at my house, I got something for you. I'm going to put something in your drink. You're not coming over here for no reason. You don't have to waste my time. At least you don't look at the camera. You don't have to be like, what's your problem? Right. Oh, here you go. Take this. Okay. Do they still have fluffers? I don't, I've never seen a fluffer in my life. I take that back. I've seen it on one set. Amber Rain was doing like a 50 guy gangbang and they had a fluffer. What? And they weren't blowing. They were just like jerking dudes off. Yeah, it's a gangbang thing. A 50 guy gangbang. Because the guys are waiting in line. You know what's funny? My gangbang, 10, 50. 10's your max? 10's my max. 10, I could do 10. How'd you come up with that number? I mean, 50, 10, I could do 10. Yeah. In a rotation of two? It's like, just a line. Where were you in the line? I wasn't. Oh, okay. You just thought of that. That's the funny thing is I was shooting next door with, oh, jeez, I can't remember who it was, but we were shooting like this MMA thing. So I had on like training shorts and all this stuff and all of my buddies were crew members were next door. So I had on these like really tight shorts and I had a warm up jacket and Amber was in makeup. So I said hi to everybody at the next studio. Was this tough love? No. This was a long time ago. Okay. So I went next door to the studio while I was waiting for her to get out of makeup saying what's up to everybody and I was like, we got shooting. They call it 50 guy gangbang with Amber. I said hi to Amber and all the dudes. While she's getting fucked? No, no, no. This was before I started, right? So I go on the set and there's a bunch of dudes. Hi Amber, how's number 23? There's a bunch of dudes sitting around. They all got like little masks on. Some dudes are ringers and stuff like that. And so I told him. Masks? Like superhero masks? Yeah, they don't want to be seen. They want to fuck but they don't want to be seen. Like eyes wide shut masks. Like everything. Oh yeah. So I was talking to. What about a paper bag? Like a grocery bag. That was the point that I was in but. So I was talking to one of the lighting guys, Sly, and he goes, I fucking hate this shit. Athlete guys can't do it, whatever. And I go watch this. So I had on these training shorts and my warm up jacket and I hopped up on the table and I took my jacket off and I was like, okay, who's first? And all the dudes were like, oh my God. And they just fucking looked around and shit. And I just waited. And they were like, didn't know what to say. I was like, ah, fucking with you. Never mind. I'm going to get the fuck out of here. That was comedy. They had to pay the fluffer overtime because of your hygiene. They were like, I don't. I'm like, what do you do to prepare to get gang banged by 50? What kind of pussy exercises do you do? You don't. I mean like, what do you do? You just lay there and take it. You don't stretch. I personally don't. They ice it sometimes. I mean, no, no, but she's talking about the girl. The girl's got to do kegels I would imagine. Yeah. You know what? By the end of the time, it's probably not even 50 dudes. It's probably more like 15. Benoit balls. They rotate the guys through. Half the guys can't get it up. The other half pop early. Whatever. Yeah, that's the weird thing about gang banging. What's the difference between 15 or 50? None. At that point, so said Josie Cat. What does that mean? I'm not surprised, but... Fuck you, Mark. Now, you were saying that one of your ex-boyfriends should be a porno star and we're not going to name him. We were going to call him, but apparently he chickened out or he was too cool for us. No, he doesn't want to be exposed. Now, how is this guy like a porn star? So what's his name? And why do you keep looking over here right before you say something? Because he reminds me of him. You remind me of him, but he's black though. Exactly. So his dick sits on the couch. It sits on the couch? Yeah, it sits on the couch. Like, you know, most, most men's dicks sit on their lap. Oh, no, no, no, no. Or on their legs. I wouldn't know anything about that. And their legs sit on the couch. Like, no, his dick sits on the couch. I'm going to have to pick it up from the couch. So like when he wears shorts, it like picks it up? Yeah, I might go over there afterwards. So that's a warm up before she handled it. So when he sits, so he wears shorts, it like sticks out? Yeah, it can. No, but he wears long shorts, but it can. And he's got no problem getting it up? No, not at all. And he's good. I mean, he's an excellent lover. It doesn't even, I mean, he sucked my boobs one time and made me cum on myself. That's ridiculous. Oh, really? Yes. I had an orgasm. I didn't even know that could happen to my body. I'm going to slap them. Wow. I thought that was awesome. What did you think? An orgasm or an orgasm just sucking on the tits? Just sucking on my tits. That's all he was doing. And I was like, literally like, he like, literally, once you get done having sex with him, like your car keys and your ATM card just go in his pocket. Oh, that's not good. Wait, that's great from where he's sitting. Like literally. Well, before you got into porn, you probably, I mean, you were a ladies band. And you were, I mean, you were. I don't know. I don't think any cock can make that happen for me. Oh, well, that's some bullshit. Oh, your ATM card? I swear. That's some bullshit. You just haven't had the right one. Well, yeah. Yeah. I've been bought pretty much everything under the sun before porn. Right. You bought me a drink the other night. Hey. I didn't fuck you yet, but I think. I didn't give you my car keys and my credit card. Not yet. I bought you a $2 Pabst. I don't drink Pabst. You know I don't drink beer. I got it. It was a Shirley Temple. But yeah, well, I have, but you haven't, I haven't fucked you yet. So the car keys and the ATM card are on their way, I'm sure. She's going to start making songs about you. Yeah, exactly. It's a sex. Well, sex junkies already been done, but, but you were, but you were ladies, man. So, so, I mean, you, you got to have some fucking confidence. Say, look, I can go into porn, fuck it, you know, whatever. You know, the first time that it was ever tested was I worked with a guy named Chris Charming. We were doing a DP on Veronica Jet. Right. And, well, how was that? I had heard about Chris Charming. Like, somebody was like, oh, that dude has a big ass dick. And it was the first time I had done, or the second time I had done like more than one dude in the scene. Right. And so I wasn't used to that. And you see this little frail dude, about 150 pounds. Right. And I was like, how big could it really be? Like, in your head, you start to suck yourself up. Yeah. And, so we introduced ourselves and he's like, he's German. He's like, oh yeah, I know why they hired me. I have a huge cock. And I was like, well, you know, they hired me because I'm fucking cute. I don't know what to say to that. Like, what do you say? You know what I mean? Like, I can kick your ass? I don't know. Right, right. It's like Ron Jeremy. People watch the movies because it's like, well shit, if he's fucking her, anybody can fuck her. Right. And he's got a big dick. Right. And so he turned around and take his stuff off and I was like, oh, that's nothing. He turned back around and I was like, oh, Jesus Christ. And I was like, I had to like, take a break, go talk myself into it in the bathroom, give myself a little pep talk. Was this an invasion of the porno shooters or? It was for Johnny Darko. I forgot what it was. Your ass is mine, Sonny and Cher. I couldn't even tell you. I'm on your ID and DP page. Game Blonde, DD7. Yeah, there's a lot of good ones. Well, what do you think is the funniest porno title that you've done? Team Squirt 2, Rookie Pussy 2. The ones that I've directed. I did, yeah, the ones you directed have, yeah, I did one called This Cock's Too Big for 3D. This Cock's Too Big for 3D? Yeah. That's a long ass title. I hope the cock goes all the way across the whole title. Well, it's 3D, it comes right at you. everything in 3D. Did you shoot like a cum shot in 3D? Like the cum comes at you? Yeah. You don't like the panty shots that they flip them at the camera and all kind of. Because I haven't seen 3D porn, that's crazy. Yeah, Penthouse shot it for years. I would love to see better storylines. Yeah, well, he's an all-time, he's a good storyline. Well, we shoot this stuff in two fucking days, so good luck. Oh, I mean, we'll just, we'll keep it out then. We can't. Just walk in the house and do it. Bring that ass down here, bitch. If you watch stories, and I think I know who you played in this one, you were in the official Jerry Springer parody, so I'm assuming you played Steve. I might have. I think I did, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's a story. Yeah, that's a good one. No, but the comic book ones you do, the Captain America, the Wolverine, the Batman. I played Mandarin. I played Deadpool. I had to fuck with that whole costume on. But those have intricate plots, and you just did a Fast and the Furious parody where you played Vin Diesel as a character. It was a good one called Ride or Die. And there were actually cars, like there were car chases in the porn. Oh, okay. We hooked it up. Oh, okay. I like that. Actually, we had better cars. The funny thing with that one was we were shooting downtown on the Sixth Street Bridge, and we had that locked down, and they were shooting inserts for the next Fast and Furious like three streets over. And we accidentally kept overlapping their set and we were getting in trouble. Right. So we had a 1,200 horsepower Mustang street car, and they were like, you guys are fucking up our shots in these big ass helicopters and shit. So there were no drag races between you and the Fast and the Furious guys? No, they didn't. Their cars were whack compared to what we brought. How is that? They got the budget. Porn has the budget. No, no, no. I wish porn had the budget. No, you don't have the Fast and the Furious budget. You can't say that. But the cars that they had were mediocre at best. Right. We had some pretty, considering our budget, we had some pretty kick-ass cars. Right. And that one was fun. This ain't the Expendables XXX? You gotta have a boy in that. I had a cameo in that. I did the Bruce Willis cameo in the church. Oh, okay. I love, I would fuck Bruce Willis. So you like bald guys, bald white guys? No, I just want him to say Yippee-ki-yay while we fucking. That's not a problem. That'd be fun. I'm gonna light that up. Which leads me to my next, when did you start losing your hair? Oh, probably like 17, 18. Right? You just went with the shaved look and Fuck it, shave it. Okay. It doesn't bother Camara either apparently. So, Josie? Most girls, most girls like bald head. Yeah, bald everything. Now you tell me. I mean, if it's on an old dude, then it's like, okay, it's old bald dude. But, you know. Yeah, yeah. Well, if they have the little, like the little crown. The little back. Or I saw a guy this weekend that had a bald head with a rat tail. Oh, yeah. That's disgusting. That's ridiculous. But when you first got into porn, you were saying in an interview, nobody, people didn't look like you and they, things have caught up. People started looking like you. There was, only Mark Davis was the only other bald white guy and there were no guys that had tattoos like what I had. Right. And so initially I was getting a lot of slack. Christian doesn't have tattoos. Oh. And he's gay. Moving on. You got some fresh ink right there. I noticed you've been Yeah, yeah. I just got, I just finished the bottom part of the sleeve last night actually. Yeah. Right. Who did it? A guy named Danny at Danny Wild at Tattoo Mania. Oh, Tattoo Mania. Yeah, my boy Rocco. I like what he said. He's like, yeah, Danny. And you're like, oh yeah, yeah, Danny. Like, Danny at Tattoo Mania, of course. He's, you're pretending that you're agreeing with him. 15 years. Yeah, no, but it's close. And a lot of people know Tattoo Mania because it's been there as part of the whiskey. Yeah, they've been there forever. Trust is earned. I was trying to read it all day, yeah, so. That usually works out well when I'm grabbing a girl's hair and they take that picture. Right. It's good. The honey. You just happen to be in this direction. Come here, can he grab your hair and earn your trust? She got handlebars already, so. Right. I'm not really tripping. Yeah, he grabbed my hair. And it's hers, so I'm not. Yeah, that's why I wear my real hair so it can be grabbed. Yeah, right, right. You didn't know no weave tonight. Good, I'm glad you're prepared. Yeah, I like my ass smacked, all that. Oh, really? Yeah, choked, all that. That's something different now. You should have been here last week. Oh, yeah, we had some choked, we had some fire. No, I showed you what happened last week. Yeah. And next time we have that, anytime you want to get choked, we got some people that can do it. I was like, oh shit. So I didn't know you were, do you like to get choked? Yeah, I like to get choked. Spanked and all that stuff. A lot of girls do. I think more girls do than don't. Right. And the ones that say they don't are just closet about it. I'm slowly, I'm slowly learning this. Yeah. Josie said she don't and she got choked and she's like, eh, it's kind of, I kind of like it. when I'm with someone, I allow them to, to be dominant. Right. Um, in public though, I'm not like, well, no, you can't, you can't choke me at the movies. That's not, I'm not. The dom role. No, no. No, not at the movies. But if I'm intimate with someone, then. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Nobody's going to see. Yeah. No choking in the park. No choking at McDonald's. I get it. But, so, so, so, I see you're just trying to order. Can I get a, uh, and if, and yeah, and if you have a small dick, you can't even argue with me. Like we're in a relationship. And you get mad, and your dick is small. Only thing you can do is be like, oh man, that's all you can say to me. How many, how many small dick guys have you been to have a relationship with? That's some girl shit right there. But if you have a big dick, you can be like, fuck this shit. It's some bullshit. You can go off. But little dick just, oh man, that's all you can say. That's all you can do. How many little dick guys have you gone out with? Not that many. Right. Cause I tell them, like, why did you show up? This is not fair. Right. Come on. Why are you kicking people? This is bullshit. Men cannot get away with that. Why, why? Like if a girl turned her clothes off, we were like, oh hell no. Ah, you'd be surprised. Yeah. We can't get away with it. I mean, you can't. If she has a little dick, he'd be like, oh come on. He'd at least argue with it. That's how I feel. You didn't pull your, oh come on, you didn't got me hot, said you was gonna fuck you, and then y'all lie. That's the point. If you didn't tell me over the phone, oh baby, I'm gonna do you like this, do you like this, and I'm like, hold on. He's got a cavernous vagina, yeah, we can't really say look. Yeah, we never talk about that, do we? We always talk about men having a small dick. We don't talk about women having a big fucking pussy. If you don't, if you've got the vagina lips hanging down, we can't say look. Holy shit. You can't have this. If they're not out here taking care of their bitch. If you've got the roast beef, stick it to the thighs. Oh my God. We can't say look. The shaman meat? Yeah, none of that. Like girls can communicate with each other and be like, girl, look. They love me, so I don't have complaints. No, no, no, no, well, I'll tell you one thing you can do. Don't you do things like this. What? What's that? Like they're hanging low or something, I don't know. Well, see, in our community. What is it? In our community. Wait, wait, wait, you're onto something, Derek. Now, can you women tell how big the dick is? Josie, can you tell how big the dick is? Sometimes. Sometimes? There's no rhyme or reason. I mean, can you really tell how big the dick is? No. I mean, it depends. No, you can't tell. If anybody says that, you can't tell. You can hope. You can go off the step like, oh, he has big feet, or he has a big nose or something. No, no. Or he's unborn. Well, you can see it in sweatpants. Yeah, you can. You just have a marker at your door, huh? You gotta be this tall to ride. For real. Sure. Because men want what they want. What do men, men go after big butts, this, that. How you gonna have a little wee wee and want a big butt? Listen, if we're horny, we will fuck everything that's not nailed down. That doesn't even, that doesn't make no sense. The circumference, you can't even get through, you know. Right, right. We want to stick our, we don't dig in the big ass. How you dig a diameter in the ass? Right, right, right. You know what I'm saying? Gotta have a dick that's proportional to the ass. Then they will open your ass all up, and then your shit split open, and then you all have to work like this. You gotta work like this, goddamn. Hey, I think that might have happened in Captain America, Triple X, and Axel Ron parody. I'm not sure that you were, but no, but this brings up. I've done Plumper Pass movies, so I'm good. What's that? I said I've done Plumper Pass movies. What's Plumper Pass movies? It's a website called Plumper Pass. Plumper Pass? They do all BBW stuff. Oh, here we go with the BBW again. I mean that BBW shit. You just set her off. You just set her off. What do you mean about it? No, no, the big beautiful women. Tell us what you mean about it. Big beautiful women. How do I, big beautiful women? Don't call me that. I don't know what, I make a joke. It's called Big Booger Wolf. I said it about Josie. I didn't say it about you. I know what a Booger Wolf is. Yeah, Big Booger Wolf. I mean, you've been in the Bay before. Big Booger Wolf. So you fuck fat girls on film? Yeah, and I mean girls that weigh more than I do. Okay, question of the day. Question of the day. Whose pussy is better, straight up? What? Fat pussy or skinny pussy? Oh, thick girls all day. I told you. Exactly. Thick girls all day. They try harder. They try harder. It's a combination between the two. I'd always choose a little more over a little less, and big girls typically have more to prove. I hear that you're into Asian and Latin women. I like, I work backwards. I work backwards from what I dislike the most, which is typically blonde and white girls, and then I move from there. Right. So the other end of the spectrum is like Asian and Latin, and then black girls, and like that's all kind of like intermixed right there, and then we move down the spectrum. And you've got your choice. You're a porn star. Now, have you met women, and then they find out what you're doing, and they find out what you do for a living, and they turn off? It all depends on how you present it. How do you present it? Depends. If I want to, if I really want to talk to you or not, that's where it kind of runs in. So if I'm interested in a girl, and we go out, and I'll give them their whole little line about, look, like I'd like to see you again. I think you're really cool, but I kind of got to come clean about, you know, something I told you. I do these activities, but there's also something else I do. I'm involved in the entertainment industry. Right. And so usually they'll say, well, what kind of entertainment? And some of them get it, and some of them don't. I used to have a radio show. Right. On Sirius and XM. Right. On Playboy. Right. Look at it. He's easing them into it. Right. Exactly. It's like doing anal. It's like doing anal. You just got to take your time with it. Right. You do. Yeah. Please. And so you kind of go through. It's not a run and gun kind of thing. So there's levels to it, and then you ease them into the whole thing. And then there's the other avenue. So you don't just start out, look, I just ate a BBW's ass last night for a website. No. Okay. You got to ease them into it. Yeah. And then the other end of the spectrum is, if I don't really give a fuck about that bitch, then they're like, what do you do for a living? And I'm like, I fuck girls for a living. A lot. Well, you know what? To be honest with you, I know that there's some girls I've met that if I told them I was a porn star, you know, if I look like you, I told them I'm a porn star, it's on. And there's some women that it's not on. Yeah, but then they never take you seriously. They just want to fuck you for like a bucket list kind of thing. Right. That happens often. Right. Go ahead, Karina. I didn't mean to interrupt. Well, I was going to say, I think that women can deal with that more than men. I agree. Really? Because men are hoes anyway. Like, the only thing he's doing is telling you the truth. Right. And he's getting paid. Bring the money home. At the end of the day, they cheat on you and spend your money. No, I've been cheated on. There's some female hoes too. At least you're bringing the money home. Shit. There's some female hoes too. Yeah, there are. Yeah. But you couldn't deal with, like, men can't deal with us being hoes. We can deal with you guys being hoes all the time. Like, men will cheat on us and we'll still be with you. If we cheat on y'all, oh, she's a fucking slut. Yeah, absolutely. Well, I have a personal rule. If a woman cheats on me, it's over. I mean, that's it. And I tell them right up front, that's it. What's your definition of cheating? Fucking somebody else. Period? Yeah. Well, you know what, to be honest with you. Because my definition of cheating is if you just do it when I don't know about it. Whoa. See, if I know about it, if we talk about it beforehand, if we're dating and then she goes, like, daddy, I'm gonna fuck somebody else. Like, I put that in there, right? See, there you go. So I guess you're right. I couldn't date a porn star because she's paid to fuck other people. Right. So I don't know. Even though you know about it. But if we had that understanding beforehand, then, and for me anyway, it's like she has now permission to do it. I did that. That's me. I allowed you to have that happen. But have you dated other non-porn stars and they could fuck anybody they want? Well, here's the difference between the two is if you date somebody within the business, there's advantages. One of the advantages, well, they know what you do for a living. And lots of testing. It's not even that. The disadvantage is if the girl, you're dating, doesn't like the girl you're about to work with, now there's a problem. I know that bitch. Fuck her. She's going to try and talk to you. She'll try and fuck you in the bathroom. Blah, blah, blah. Sounds to me from what you're saying that there's a lot more drama with the girls than there is with the guys in the industry. It can be. But when you, when you date somebody that's not in the business, now the other avenue, like if, if she's cool with it, she's cool with it 100%. Like she doesn't, she has no idea the difference between Bridget B and Nikki Benz. She just knows this is another bitch. Right. That's all she knows. That's all she cares about. So she's cool with one, she's cool with the other. Right. Doesn't matter to her. Right. Oh, but if she's in the business, she don't like her and then you, I get it. I know that bitch. I get it. She fucking talk shit about me, whatever. I get it. And you're like, ugh. I get it. She can't, she can't, she can't. Now I can't work with you. Whatever it is. Now, now you have to explain to that girl, like I like you, but my girl doesn't really like you. So now there's more drama. So now you can't work with any of her friends. Right. And you can't work with that girl's friends sometimes. Yeah, that's too much. So it can get rough that way. Have you been jealous of like, guys that fucked your ex-porn star girlfriends? I mean, have you had drama? It's like, oh yeah, yeah, she's good. Have fun, you know. If the girls that I dated, if I told them, I don't want you working with somebody, it's because it was personal. Like, it was like, I don't like him for this particular reason. Like, we have a personal problem. Right. But there's guys I don't like in the business, and I'm like, I don't care. Go do your fucking job. Right. Suck some dick. Right. Whatever. Let me ask you a question, because we only get, I tell you, the show goes by real fast, so it's a mess. I did want to ask you, because you, before you were in porn, you were, first off, you were a trainer, and you also were an MMA trainer for some serious. I still am an MMA trainer. Okay, so you're an MMA trainer. But I mean, you train people that have gone on to, to professional, but. I have corner guys who are in WEC, which is now defunct, because UFC bought them. Right. They were always part of UFC. Right. And then one of my fighters is a 135, or in UFC. Okay, so you've trained people that are in UFC. How come you never did it competitively? Too fucking old. Shit hurts. But you're not too fucking old to do porno. No. Okay. That doesn't hurt. That's a huge difference. No, but I mean, I'm not getting punched in the face when I'm trying to have sex. I mean, you're 40 now, but when did you start doing MMA? Well, I started martial arts when I was 19. Right. I've been on a US team and two collegiate world teams for taekwondo, yeah. Oh, wow. And then I boxed for about seven years, and then I've been doing. Amateur professional? No, no, just amateur. Not even amateur, just training. Just training, yeah. With a guy named Stan Ward, who's an old school guy. I know the name. Yeah. And then that moved into all of the no-gi grappling stuff with all the guys I'm with now. Right. Yeah. So, okay, so when UFC started like 15 years ago, you kind of got interested in that? Yeah, I was interested in the spectacle of it, but I didn't really become serious about, I was really casual about it before, before I started working with these guys. Right. So, yeah, acquired taste. but, because you started, because you started porn when you were like, you were in the 30s. 30, 30s. So you're an old, I mean, I'm not saying you're old, but I mean, for porn, I mean. I couldn't have done porn if I was in my early 20s. Are you crazy? I don't do drugs, I don't drink, I don't smoke, so I'm really boring. I don't think I could have held that up and had that much, I don't know how you're 22, 23 years old, and you make X number of dollars for those guys, it's a lot of money. Straight, like, you know, doing what you should be doing at 23. You don't hear the story about women, I mean, other than like Blue Iris and Grandma porn, you don't hear like women like starting at 35. Yeah, Veronica Avlo did. Oh, did she? Yeah, she started at eight. Okay, there's one, okay. Let's see. I can still start. Kendra Lust, Kendra Lust, really popular, she started later. Right. Phoenix Marie is 30. No, come here, you could, are you thinking of going into porn? We should, well, maybe. Look, times is getting hard. I know. Listen, my phone shoots in HD. I got you. Oh my goodness. Don't trip. Yeah, and then, you know, they got that big girl thing going on, I guess, and I'm a fine big girl, that's why I don't want to lose weight. You're beautiful. I might be an alright skinny girl, but I'm a fine big girl. And that's the thing, there are fine big girls, there's not a lot of fine big guys, it's a whole thing, there's a whole fetish for BBWs, Derek will tell you. Yeah. And there's a whole, there's a whole market for it. I was overwhelmed the first time I saw BBWs seen it. It was a great scene. It was a big, big BBW. It was me, another guy named Mark Anthony, and then three really big girls, and they were all super cool, but you're just like, oh my God, I'm going to get eaten alive. The folds, the cellulite, the flaps. And they're all down for whatever you, what do you want me to do? You want me to rub your back? You want me to stroke your balls? I'm sure. They probably were going to make some spaghetti too. They wanted to be there. They wanted to be there. The craft service must have been fucking great. You know, they were hungry. Yeah. They were hungry. I'm sure you helped them work up an appetite too. You know, that's probably the best sex y'all could go. Like, we get the whack, you know, you know, like, you know, like, you don't get the top of the line. You know what you should do? You know what you should do? And I'm sure this has been done. I'm pretty sure that was it. But you know what you should do? I'm sure this has been done. You should rent out like a hometown buffet. Oh my God. Like all the hours that have been right on the buffet. That is hilarious. Eat, eat, and fucking fuck the whole fucking time. You fucking eat and they doing the ice cream thing like that? Right. Oh yeah, the ice cream. They would be paying to be in it. The cuts between the ice cream and the dick and the whole thing. Oh my God. The cum shots and the soft serve. That'd be fucking great. Hilarious. Oh yeah, that would be funny. See, now I'm thinking, now I'm thinking like a director. Now you're a director. You got some stuff coming out, right? Yeah, I direct with a guy named David Lord for a company called Primal Productions. So we shoot a bunch of different stuff. But this year I've had, what do I have? A Hustlers 40th anniversary. I did a movie called Hard and Fast which is an all sex release. It's all like motorcycles and quads and dirt bike. Oh wow, it's like motorcycle scenes and are you fucking on a motorcycle? Yeah, I know that, but I mean, are you guys, you're fucking on the motorcycles, fucking on the quads. But I mean, do they have like little motorcycle scenes and you guys are going in the dunes and then they're fucking? Yeah. See, there's stories here. Where's the weirdest place you ever did it? Weirdest? Fuck, I don't know. Rock in the back of somebody's yard, middle of the desert. Well, it's hard to top the 13 year old story when he's outside the window. That's probably the weirdest place I really think about it. Yeah, it's probably the weirdest place. What's the weirdest place you fucked up, Camara? In the back of a van while my boyfriend's mom and sister was driving him home. Okay, that's pretty fucking weird. That's weird. She had a catering van. Yeah. So, you know, at that cage and we were in the back. And they didn't know you were fucking? And they didn't know. They were just talking to us. Where do we make a right turn at? By the way, you noticed that was you and your female friend, right? No. Oh, your male friend. Okay. Yeah, I don't do female. Okay. All right. I thought I caught you with something. Never. Never. You've never done anything? Never. Strictly dickly. So, you were in the back of a moving van. If I was gay, I would probably be abusive. Right. Like, bitch, clean the house up. I'm not about to. Right. And Josie, what's the weirdest place you fucked? Bathroom church. Oh. That's not weird. That's good. That's blasphemous. That's good. I'd have done it on the altar if they'd let me in the church. Right. I don't mess with Jesus. I'm black. I don't mess with Jesus. No, you do, you mess with Jesus because your cell phone goes off in church. You told me that at the beginning of the show. Everybody has had that accident. Right. It's not an accident. You didn't turn it off. Like I said, you probably have an attitude about it. She was sexting in church. I know what she was. It's bad, too, when a song is like, you know what I'm saying? Just all kind of irate. Wait, your ringtone is pumps and a bump? Something. It was something crazy. I'll be making waves. Pumps and a bump. Pumps and a bump. We love the girl with the pumps and a bump. Every day I'm hustling. Anyway, where does the time go? Derek, if people want to get a hold of you, let them know how to get a hold of you and what you got coming up. You can reach me on Twitter at at D Pierce triple X. You can reach me on Instagram at Derek Pierce, D-E-R-R-I-C-K, Pierce. What do I have coming up? I have three movies next month. One's a high-heeled fetish movie. One's a massage movie and the other one's like a Fifty Shades kind of movie. Okay, did they stick the high heels in your ass? I love that shit. In your ass? In your ass? Whatever your fetishes are, Mark, we can get to the No, I'm asking, what do they do with the high heels? Do they stick them in your ass? Do they stick them in your balls? What would you have a girl do with high heels? Wear them. Oh, okay. Girls in heels look fucking amazing. Do you have a foot fetish? I have a heel fetish. Okay. A shoe fetish. All right, okay. Big time. All right. Camara, how do people get a hold of you? Tell us about your show every Wednesday night. Oh my God, I have a show coming up September 6th at Inside Jokes. Oh, okay. Yeah, we did show at Inside Jokes. You can reach me on Twitter, Instagram, Camara White is. I'm on Facebook, Camara White, and Derek Pierce can reach me at 310-366-7244. Was that your real number? I hope not. No, it's not. I know, I was saying. We had somebody get a number. By the way, Camara, there's the phone. And Josie, how do people get a hold of you? Just Google me, Josie, J-O-S-I, Kat, K-A-T, and you'll find all my websites. I'm sorry that I, I'm sorry I got the cock blocker in the middle of there, Camara, she got all your action with the adult porn star here, the male porn star. Oh, she can have fun. I'll have her fun. It's always a love connection on the Dark Mark show. Right. Anyway. I mean, I have to fuck, I want to be a chuckle fucker. I have to fuck a white boy once in my life. Are you going to be a chuckle fucker? I'm going to be a professional. What's a chuckle fucker? A chuckle fucker is somebody who fucks comedians. Have you fucked other comedians? No. No. Oh, okay, so this will be the first one. Yeah, I could see you fucking, yeah. I'll give you a good idea. Make the whole circuit, yeah. I was going to say, yeah. She's going to go on my Instagram and break it down. Look, this nigga is the truth. Well, you know, Camara, once you go white, you know you've done it right. Anyway, yeah. Sure have. Derek, Camara, Josie, thank you. Everybody have a wonderfully creepy week. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. you